The Bend In The Wave
by HyperFitched
Summary: Naomi Is a student studying marine conservation.  When she travels with her best friend to the Welsh coast for a practical project she meets an intriguing bunch of locals, one of whom manages to completely enchant her.
1. Sea Blindness

**What? You again Hypes? And so soon? Well the long and the short of it is I have a new friend who has been very sick for a long time and has been in hospital for a while. She is a very brave young woman, and had a big scare recently. So as a reward for pulling through I told her I'd write her a story. And here it is, or the beginning of it anyway. She loves Naomily, and she loves the ocean, so I thought I'd put the two of them together. This will be an angst free zone, as the last thing she needs is any more trauma. So sit back and feel free to enjoy…**

**Any mistakes are due to the fact that I've been partying.**

**I don't own Skins, but I'd like to think I am using its powers for good**

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1. Sea Blindness

Naomi

"Isn't she beautiful," said Thomas, smiling that indelible smile of his.

For once, the depth and joy of my smile matched his.

"Oh my God," I sighed contentedly. "I think I'm in love."

I was standing at the top of a cliff with a boy who ran away from an almost land locked country, and fell in love with the sea. We'd been friends since we both went to the same shitty sixth form college in Bristol. I was the first person he'd made friends with when he arrived. Which was quite an achievement on his part, seeing as I was usually such a cynical, uncommunicative loner. But Thomas is such a gracious human being, I defy anyone to deny his charms. I guess he was attracted to the fact that I was an outsider like he was. A stranger in my own land.

I took him to Weston-super-Mare on a day trip. It's a shitty little resort, and it was raining, but Thomas didn't care. As soon as he saw the sea he ran towards it, stripping down to his boxers as he went, and then jumped right in, splashing about like an excited puppy in the waves. I had to hold him for about twenty minutes afterwards to try to stop him from shivering, but it didn't put him off. From that moment on he started begging me to go with him to the coast whenever we could. We started local, but eventually began to venture further afield to Devon and Cornwall, and soon we were spending most of our free time down by the water.

We stayed close throughout college, my interests and his meshing until they found a common ground. I had grown up with a hippy mother and the various randoms she collected. I had been going on protests and marches since before I could walk. I became passionate about the environment and was desperate to try and help do something about it before it was too late. Despite the fluffy-minded chaos of my home life, it turned out I had quite the brain for science. And I was determined to use that brain to make a difference. To make people listen. To change the world. Thomas had quite a brain on him too, and though his parents had hoped a British education would turn him into a doctor or a lawyer or some such, in the end we both applied for the same course in marine biology and conservation. I was no longer alone. Thomas and I were going to change the world together.

Everyone who met us thought we were a couple, but we weren't. Don't get me wrong, Thomas is an intelligent, well-mannered, charming and incredibly good-looking guy. By anyone's rating he was most definitely boyfriend material. If things were different I'm sure we would have ended up together. I even kissed him once, but that only confirmed what I'd suspected for a while. I didn't want a boyfriend at all.

Thomas was the first person I came out to. About five minutes after I'd kissed Stacey Mathiesson in the middle of the dancefloor at a filthy drum and bass night at the Trinity. She had been doing it because she wanted to wind her boyfriend up. I had been doing it because I wanted to get Stacey Mathiesson into bed.

Although we has several more snogging sessions and I even got to feel her tits once, I never did get to go to bed with Stacey Mathiesson. It's one of the biggest regrets of my life. Stacey had a gorgeous body, delicious auburn curls that she used to flick around her as though she was in a shampoo ad, and a smile that could melt the heart of the most unfeeling person on earth. Sadly, she wasted all of these fine assets on a gormless dick called Jed who completely didn't deserve her. And so the fanfare of my grand coming out was quickly followed by a year of moping over Stacey, and failing to get off with other girls because they didn't measure up to her. University was a different matter. Freed from the shackles of seeing Stacey every day, I decided to explore the wonderful world of lesbianism with renewed vigour. I met a few nice girls, had a few cool flings, and one incredibly clingy girlfriend, who I had to let go when she even started getting jealous of Thomas. But no one who really gave me the thrill that Stacey did. No one who could make my whole life better, just because she walked into the room.

But it was cool. I put that down to teenage infatuation, and figured that this regular type of attraction was how things really were. Maybe one day I'd get lucky and find a girl who didn't start to bore me as soon as the first fires of passion had died down. Maybe not. I had my best friend and an ocean to save. These were the things that mattered

Which was why we were stood on top of this cliff right now looking down on the waves rolling into Rhossili beach. It's at one end of a gorgeous bay at the end of the Gower Peninsula in South Wales. This was going to be our base for two months as we worked on a practical module for our course. We were going to be taking samples of the water quality over a period of time, to measure the effects of pollution from the west Wales refinery towns and it's impact on the food chain of the Minke whales of the Irish sea. My mum had teased me that it was just a way of getting our jollies in one of the most beautiful locations in the country, but I knew deep down that she was hugely proud of me, fabulous old hippy that she was. It was quite an ambitious project for two second year students to be taking on on their own, but me and Thomas were the top of our class, and I knew we were going to ace it. We had already worked up a system and a mapping process, installed a model on our computers for future projections, and hired some guy who was going to take us out in his boat. We had applied for and gotten a bursary from the university to pay for us to hire a little cottage so that we'd have a proper base to work from. To say we were excited was the understatement of the year. The next two months were going to be boss.

"Come on," said Thomas excitedly, hoiking his backpack up onto his shoulder. "Let's go."

We had arrived here and gotten settled in to the cottage this morning, and then come straight here. I knew Thomas was dying to get in the water. I swear that boy must have been a fish in a past life. Despite coming from central Africa, he had acclimatised quite quickly and would go in the water whether it was rain or shine. I had poor circulation and was very much more of a fair-weather fish. Luckily, despite being early May the weather today was unseasonably hot and sunny. A good omen for our first day, I think. Thomas bounded down the steep path like a mountain goat whilst I followed on a little more gingerly behind him.

By the time I caught up with him, he was already in the water. I'll never tire of the smile on his face. It inspires me, and so in spite of myself, I got changed and ventured in to join him. Even though it was hot on the beach, it was only the beginning of the summer and the sea was still fucking cold. I totally lost my cool and shrieked like a little girl when I gingerly tiptoed in. I had just about forced myself to go waist deep, when I heard Thomas laughing. I tried to run, because I knew what was coming next, but the resistance of the water made it too difficult. Before I had even gotten a metre, I felt his hands on my shoulders, and he unceremoniously dunked me into the icy water. And yes, people of the world, it is possible to cough, splutter and yet still curse and swear like a whole frigate full of sailors. Another reason I love Thomas (even though I hated him right then) is that no matter how much mardy shit I throw at him, he still just laughs and loves me anyway.

"You can't just keep on tiptoeing around, Naomi," he smiled. "It only hurts you more in the end. Sometimes you just have to take the plunge, feel the rush, and then enjoy the warmth that comes afterwards."

I knew he wasn't just talking about the waves. He was talking about the way I overthink everything in my life. I'm always thinking about the consequences before I'll do anything, calculating the odds, weighing up the pros and cons. I've tried to chill, to be more like Thomas, cause it certainly seems to make him happy, but my brain just won't stop working. It races along at a hundred miles an hour, and the only way I can get it to stop is when I anaesthetise it with booze or drugs. But I can't live my life wasted, so most of the time I just have to put up with it.

Thomas has had his heart broken more than a couple of times. He's such a good-hearted man, he seems to attract evil witches who take shameless advantage of him. But in spite of this, he's still an optimist. He still always sees the good in people. I'm the opposite. Even Stacey didn't break my heart, because when I analysed the situation, I knew she could never really be mine. But I'm distrustful. Whenever a good thing is laid out before me, I am always looking for the catch.

After our swim and my enforced lesson in 'taking the plunge', we decided to chill out with a cheeky spliff. So much more my style. I know I sound like a bit of a wuss for someone who is hoping to save the oceans, but I kind of pictured myself more as being on the boat analysing data or studying stuff that lives in warmer water. And yes, it pisses me off that the African boy is more hardcore about the cold than I am, but hey, I have poor circulation, what can I do?

The beach was pretty much empty. The whole bay is about three or so miles long, and is a bit of a hidden treasure, being so far away from what most people would call civilisation. To the north there is Llangennith, where a lot of the surfers hang out. And to the south there is a gorgeous rocky outcrop bleeding out into the sea called The Worm's Head, which you can only walk to at high tide. When I was researching for this project, I got to see an awful lot of pictures of fabulous sunsets over here. It looked breathtaking and I was looking forward to seeing a few of those for myself for real. Thomas handed me the spliff and I took a deep drag, unconcerned by the few random dog-walkers and surfers scattered around the beach. I took another one, and then another one.

"Christ, this stuff is shit," I complained. "It's even worse than the last lot."

"What do you want me to do?" shrugged Thomas. "I told you there was a drought on. This is the best I could find."

"I wasn't dissing you, mate," I apologised hurriedly. If even Thomas couldn't get any good gear, there really wasn't any around.

"I should learn to appreciate it," I continued. "It's not like we're going to be finding any decent drugs round here."

I sat up on my towel and swept my arm around, gesturing to the gorgeous emptiness all around us.

Moments later, I was ready to eat my words, as I swore I had started to hallucinate. Surely this crappy homegrown couldn't be that strong, could it? But what else could account for the vision I was about to witness? I suddenly felt like I was in a movie where everything goes into slow motion and soft focus, and your ears are assailed with the swelling tones of stupidly sexy music. My heart started accelerating as soon as I saw her emerging out of the sea in front of me. The first thing I saw was the hair. Strikingly gorgeous bright red hair. That's what made me look, but after I had looked I just wanted to keep on looking. I started with her face, which was almost unbelievably pretty, with big brown eyes and the cutest little nose, and soft, beautifully kissable lips. How did I know that they were kissable? Because I immediately imagined myself kissing them.

But it didn't stop there. She emerged from the tumbling waves dressed in a shimmering cobalt blue bikini, revealing a beautifully toned and perfectly formed body that swayed tantalisingly as she waded into the shallows. My first thought was, why isn't she cold? Well ok, my first thought was, I want to fuck that girl, but my first coherent thought was, why isn't she cold? But then again when you are a goddess in human form, maybe you don't feel the cold.

It was a total Bond film moment, one I would replay in my head over and over again. She was a complete honey, the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my life. I know I was a little bit stoned, but I thought I was going to pass out from the overwhelming intensity of her loveliness. I had no idea it was possible for another person to affect me so much, but when she sauntered by, casually throwing a friendly smile in our direction, I was almost left gasping for breath. The flashbacks started almost immediately. The way the white water of the waves had caressed her exquisite curves. The way her wet hair fell teasingly around her neck. The way that shimmering bikini clung to her perfect tits. The way the sunlight shone in the beads of water on her skin….

I don't think I had moved a muscle until Thomas shoved me in the arm, waking me from my trance.

"She's a very pretty lady, no?" he grinned

My heart was pleading for me to just get up and run after her. To find any lame excuse to introduce myself. My heart was yelling that it would be ok. That she was a good person. That it already knew it was in love with her. But my stupid brain was contradicting it. Already coming up with a dozen different reasons why chasing her would be a really bad idea. She was probably straight. Even if she wasn't, then she would definitely have a girlfriend. Why would she want to talk to the idiot who had just blatantly drooled all over her? Love at first sight was clearly a nonsense. And blah, blah, fucking blah.

So did I go and seize the moment, and take a chance on life? No of course I didn't. I just sat there on my towel, whilst Thomas took the piss. What a loser.

We stayed at the beach for several more hours, Thomas going swimming and me replaying my James Bond fantasies in versions where I actually was a suave as Bond, and the little redhead came running willingly into my arms. After that we treated ourselves to dinner in a local pub, and went back to enjoy our first night in our new home.

I call it Sea Blindness. When you've been at the sea all day, and when you close your eyes you can still see it and hear it clear as day in your head. I love it, and usually it sends me off into the most blissful of sleeps. When I closed my eyes that night I had the most vivid and intense case of sea blindness I'd ever had. So real it was like I was still there. But this time my visions were inextricably linked not only to the waves themselves, but also to the unforgettable red-haired sea goddess who had emerged so spectacularly from their embrace.


	2. The Moment

**Well what do you know? Had a chilled day and got on a roll with this, so here we are. Cat was very happy to receive all your good wishes, and she says thank you…**

**I don't own Skins, but it's given me a few perfect moments**

2. The Moment

Emily

When I woke up this morning the sun was already streaming into my room. I got up and checked out the window and saw nothing but blue sky stretching as far as the eye could see. A huge grin spread across my face. I didn't have any classes today so the day was mine. So what to do? Go into Swansea or Cardiff and do some shopping? Fuck that for a game of soldiers. The trick would be to get out of the house before Katie tried to coerce me into doing just that. I could try and track down Effy and she if she wanted to hang, but there was plenty of time for that later. Call me predictable, but the answer was the same as it always was – the sea. You'd think I'd get bored of her, working with her all the time, but she never gets old. She is like a beautiful lover with a fascinating brain. Every day is a different conversation. Different sounds, different nuances, different shapes. Every day is a different negotiation, and she always keeps you guessing.

I pulled on some shorts and a vest top and grabbed some fruit from the kitchen. I threw a few essentials into a bag, jumped on my scooter and headed off to the bay.

"Good morning, lovely Emilio," shouted the boy in the shed as I pulled into the car park. "Might I say you're looking particularly beautiful today."

"Still gay, Cook," I laughed at him as I pulled off my helmet.

"Still worth trying, muff monkey," he grinned back at me.

Cook had been trying to get into my pants ever since we got here, which you might think would be a monumental pain in the arse, but he does it with such good humour that it's hard to get annoyed with him. And the rest of the time he just treats me like one of the lads. I left my bag with him and wandered over to the cliff's edge to check out the waves. I held my hand up to my forehead to shield my eyes from the sun, and scrutinised their pattern. After all this time here, I could read the sea like a book, especially this bay, and it only took me a moment to make my assessment. Bummer. The surf was way too choppy for any decent rides. Ok to shove a beginner out on a long board, but nothing that would get my juices going.

"How's it looking, champ?" asked Cook when I wandered back to the shed.

He let me keep a board and wetsuit there so I didn't always have to bring the company van down here, and could just chug along on my scooter instead. Cook took the money for the guy who owned the car park. It was the only car park near this end of the beach, so it always did a roaring trade. It was a menial job, but Cook had been expelled from school, and he didn't seem to mind it as it came with very little responsibility or effort required, and gave him the chance to chat up girls.

"Looking a bit rubbish to be honest," I admitted. "Not going to get much of a ride today."

I had to fix him with an evil stare before he offered me a ride on little Cookie. I could tell that he was thinking about it, but the ferocity of my gaze must have made him think twice.

"Does this mean you'll come and hang with the Cookie Monster for a bit?" he asked hopefully, pulling a pre-rolled spliff from his stash tin and waving it under my nose. Jesus, Cook it's only nine in the morning, I thought. I don't know how he did it, but I guess it helped to pass the time.

"Maybe later, Cook,' I offered. "I have to go and see my girlfriend."

"Better not keep her waiting then," he laughed. "You know how she gets."

It was our little joke that we started once when Cook was moaning that I loved the sea more than any person, especially him. And to be fair it was kind of true in a way. Of course I had my crazy family, and a great bunch of friends, but the sea was my most significant other. She was certainly the longest love affair I'd ever had. I had fallen in love with her from the moment we moved here. My Dad used to own a gym back in Bristol, but a mate had introduced him to watersports when we were on holiday once, and from that moment on there was no looking back. When my Dad sets his sights on something there's no holding him back, and within a year he had shunted us all out to Wales where we'd built up a highly successful business that eventually had the whole involved. I was sixteen at the time, and I have my suspicions that my mother's enthusiasm for the project had more than a little to do with my recent pronouncement that I was gay. I guess she thought all the fresh air and wholesomeness would somehow cure me of my affliction.

I suppose it had worked in a roundabout kind of a way. I was still as gay as a window of course, but I wasn't exactly spoilt for talent round here. I usually had to go into Cardiff before I even got a sniff of another lesbian. In fact the only remotely fuckable girl in the area was so hopelessly and unrequitedly in love with my twin sister, that the weirdness of anything happening between us had successfully put us off even in our most drunken lonely moments. Of course, I did occasionally get off with some of the clients. When I had suggested to my Dad that we set up a women only surf school, I was only partially motivated by the empowerment of the sisterhood. After all I did have that sexy teacher thing going for me, and I was only too willing to fit in a few extra private lessons for the fit girls. Eventually Mum became quietly resigned to the situation, but I don't think she ever entirely gave up hope that one day some hunky surf dude would sway me from my path.

Fat chance. The lads were ok to have a laugh with but cock just really wasn't me. I had taken all my diving qualifications and I knew a hell of a lot about surfing and all the other sports. So maybe one day I would fuck off and get a job in some exotic part of the world and get me a fit, tanned girlfriend in a bikini, but for the moment I was happy where I was.

I got changed in Cook's shed and left my shit with him, promising him I would be back to hang out with him later. My plan was to walk up to the other end of the bay and then swim the whole way back. It would be a decent workout and give me some quality time with my girlfriend.

The sun was pretty hot for this time of year, so I decided to ditch the wetsuit and just go in my bikini. Walking through the sand would get me warm pretty soon, and although I knew the sea would be fairly cold, I was pretty acclimatised to it. My plan was to swim hard, so my body would be pretty much working the whole time. Of course I would have to leg it back to Cook's pretty swiftly once I got out, but he'd have the kettle on for me as soon as I got there and some warmer clothes for me to change back into. I let my thoughts drift as I walked up the beach, my mind set free as it always was my the seductive music of the waves, and before I even knew it I had reached my destination.

As always I stood silently on the shore for a few moments before I went in, making my peace with my lover before I entered her. I wandered down to where the shallows tickled my feet, and performed a little personal ritual I had been carrying out for years. I bent down and dipped my fingers in the water, before standing up and drawing a tiny kiss on my forehead with the moisture as if sealing the bond between us. I always did this, even when I wasn't going in. Effy always laughed at me, and called me her little sea Druid, but I knew that she had her own relationship with the water that was every bit as intense as mine. How she ever fell so hard for such a shocking landlubber as my sister was beyond me, but Effy has her own mysterious ways. And they are very mysterious indeed.

I waded into the water, enjoying the bite of the cold as it rose up my body. As soon as I was up to my waist, I plunged right in. No point in fannying about, eh? The rush of adrenalin hit my body and I was off and swimming, diving head first into the aggressive white water. I worked my arms hard to get through the messy waves, resisting their attempts to pull me back towards the beach. I wouldn't get anywhere trying to swim sideways through this shit, so I had to plough on through and get myself out back, before the swell broke into these angry horses, where I could I could truly find my peace, and let my journey begin. Once I had made it I paused again, treading water and staring out into the endless reaches of the water, the water that connected me to even the most distant parts of the world. I offered her my love if she would send me some decent breaks for the first day of the new womens' course starting tomorrow, but then she was a fickle lover and she would no doubt do her own sweet thing regardless.

I smiled and kicked off into the water, swapping strokes every now and then to give myself a little variety of muscle movement. I kept my pace quite high, I wanted to push myself, but I knew enough about my own limits and the variations in where the stronger currents ran to know where I needed to conserve energy. Working with and through the water, whether it's on the board or under my own steam always gives me a tremendous natural high, and I could feel it taking over me as I pushed onwards, rising and falling with the dip of the swell. It felt so fucking good when I reached that peak, some days I felt like I could swim right over to Ireland. In fact some days I did challenge myself by swimming out as far as I dared, but I wasn't stupid. I always made sure I had plenty of energy in reserve and the minute I had the tiniest suspicion of a current I couldn't handle, I was out of there as fast as my small but powerful shoulders could take me.

My life in the waves had certainly given me a strong physique. I might only be five foot three, but you still wouldn't mess with me. It was still the talk of the village, the night I beat Freddie at arm wrestling The poor boy's had the piss ripped out of him ever since.

"God Ems, you're such a dyke," Katie had huffed, trying to defend his honour. She had a supposedly secret crush on him, except everybody knew about it, and she seemed personally offended that I'd managed to outmuscle him. But that was Katie. She was always making pronouncements.

"Oh God, Ems, you're totally perving on that girl."

Usually when the girl in question was in hearing range. Subtle. Thanks Katie.

"God Ems, you're getting such swimmer's shoulders."

I think that one was supposed to be another insult, but I didn't take it as such. I had spent many a teenage hour fantasising about the gorgeous women in the swimwear posters in our shop, and to be compared to one of them was nothing short of wish fulfilment. But despite all these pronouncements, I knew out of the two of us, I was the one who was happiest in her own skin. Ok, so she didn't have an athlete's body like mine, but then she didn't aspire to one, and she was extremely beautiful in her own way. She had lots of male admirers who adored her curves, and the most amazing tits that reduced Effy to a hopeless mess every bikini season. But even though she oozed confidence in public, Katie was one of those women who constantly worried about the way she looked. I suppose it didn't help that, despite all the attention she got from others, the boy she was in love with only had eyes for another.

Love certainly seemed to be more hassle than it was worth, but I guess that goes to show that I've never really been in love. They say that the chemicals it produces in your body are the most powerful known to man. More powerful than the ones I was producing right then as I shot through the sea like I was born to it? If that was true then it was certainly worth going out on a limb for. Or maybe Cook was right and I already had the best girlfriend I could have.

Jesus, where does my mind go sometimes? I saw the Worm's Head rising up ahead of me and realised I'd almost swum right past the edge of the beach. I smiled as I internally check my energy levels. I felt well worked, but not exhausted. Fuck me, Emily Fitch, you are a champion, a goddess of the waves.

I turned back to the ocean again for one of my favourite things of all. Waiting. Watching. Picking your moment. Breathing with the swell until you knew. This one would be the one. This one would be your wave, the one that would carry you back to shore. It was important not to be too impatient. To let your desire for the rush cloud your judgement. The waiting was all. Waiting for her to give you that perfect gift.

I saw it coming. My sixth sense starting tingling. I turned back towards the shore and started paddling just ahead of it, waiting for it to catch me up, until our energies merged. I caught it fucking perfectly and body surfed most of the way back in. I was fucking buzzed. This had been a most excellent of mornings and I felt on top of the world. Like I could do anything. I felt my feet hit the floor and rose out of the waves like I owned them. This day could only get fucking better.

It was the boy I noticed first out of the couple on the beach. He had strikingly deep black skin. This was rural Wales after all, and we're not the most representative of modern Britain's multi ethnic population. Of course we did get tourists of all variations, but this boy was still unusual enough to make me look, and mixed race couples were even rarer. At least I thought they were a couple. I mean you see a boy and a girl together and you kind of assume, don't you? They certainly would have made a breathtaking pair. She was the complete opposite to him, pale white skin, shoulder length platinum blonde hair, and arctic ice blue eyes that shone as they….

Checked me out? Oh God, she was totally checking me out. She was totally fucking hot, and she was checking me out. Well, if that's what she wants then I'd better give her a show. Work the swimmer's shoulders, Emily. Use those hips now. I thanked the sea herself, that I was feeling so in tune with myself today, and I could make this beautiful girl study me with such delirious intent. Her desire was almost tangible, like I could almost feel it's warm fingers reaching out to caress my skin. I don't think anyone had ever looked at me that way. I have been perved on and I've been ignored, and any number of things in between, but this was something different altogether. This was something beautiful. It made me want to fall to my knees in the sand and offer myself to her there and then, or at least stop and have a friendly chat. But I knew that I had a minute at most before I would become a shivering wreck now that I was out of the water. Much better I decided, to retain my air of mystery and cool now that I had made such an impression. The odds were that they had come here in some kind of vehicle, and if that were the case, it was going to be in Cook's car park.

So I kept going, throwing them a nonchalantly friendly smile as I went past, letting her think she had gotten away with it. I would hang out with Cook as long as it took, and seemingly catch them by accident later. If they were just day tripping, I would probably chalk it down to one fucking perfect moment. But if they were staying in the area for a while?

I was about to become the friendliest fucking local in the village.


	3. All At Sea

**Thank you for all the cool comments, and the links to the surfing vids. I think I'm gonna have fun with this one… and Hawke, there's a little something in there for you ;-)**

**For Cat, as ever…**

3. All At Sea

Naomi

The first thought that entered my semi-conscious brain when I woke up the next morning was her. Before I even knew what I was doing I'd turned my pillow sideways and snuggled into it, imagining I was wrapped around that gorgeous body instead. The levels of detail I conjured up were amazing considering I had only seen her for about a minute or so at most. I have a pretty good photographic memory. I can memorise maps and still see them in my head when I need to get somewhere. I can memorise entire tables of figures and remember every number down to the last decimal place. And I used every last ounce of that skill as I recreated a map of her body to facilitate my fantasies. I imagined my head resting against one of those strong shoulders. I imagined how her stomach would feel as I traced my fingers slowly and luxuriously across it. I imagined the gentle pressure of her thighs wrapped around my own. Oh God, why hadn't I spoken to her? Why, why, why?

I knew we had arranged to meet the guy with the boat this morning, but I was struggling to tear myself away from the comfort of my bed every bit as much as I would have done if she had been there for real. I made up a dozen names for her, none of which satisfied me that I had captured her essence. I imagined a multitude of scenarios where I happened to bump into her casually at the beach. Scenarios where I would manage to be all cool and interesting and immediately gain her attention, instead of being the incoherent fool I knew I would be if I ever saw her again.

If I ever saw her again. Oh God, the thought of not seeing her again actually made my heart ache. What the fuck was happening to me? Yesterday I had actually counted to a hundred before I'd allowed myself to turn around and look at her retreating form. I was immediately mesmerised by her perfectly tight bum, and the way it moved from side to side in that magnificently revealing bikini. And her back. Oh fuck my life, her back. Those incredible shoulders, the power in her obviously well used muscles, and the tattoo… Shit, I actually felt the moisture begin to gather between my thighs when I thought about that tattoo. She had been too far away for me to work out what it was, but it started between her shoulder blades and snaked its way down her spine. Oh Jesus Naomi, you are such a ridiculous pervert, I told myself, as my slutty little brain decided to treat me to a vision of myself unzipping the sea goddess out of a dress and kissing my way down that tattoo. Except that I wasn't. A pervert that is. I never usually thought of girls like this, even the ones that I was seeing. It was as if the redhead had enchanted me, and I was completely in her thrall.

"Sort it out bitch," I told myself out loud, tearing myself away from the pillow that had become my temporary lover. "She's just a girl."

Ok, she was an insanely fit girl, but still just a girl. I pulled myself together and threw back the covers, determined to get on with the business of the day. I didn't get very far. Showering was a disaster, my rebellious brain filling my head with lurid shower fantasies, and even when I managed to escape that torture, I immediately found myself daydreaming again as I sat at the kitchen table, a cup of coffee growing cold as I cradled it untouched in my hands.

"Naomi, Naomi, Naomi."

I think it must have been the third or fourth time he'd said it before I finally realised Thomas was calling my name. I shook my head to clear it, and looked up at him.

"What's wrong?" he asked me. "You were miles away."

"Nothing," I lied. "Just thinking about the project."

"What about the project?" he said.

"Um, just… you know…. Stuff," I mumbled uselessly.

It was a dead giveaway. Thomas knew me too well. He would know that if I really had been thinking about the project, I would have been able to come out with some precise scientific detail I had been musing on.

"Ah, I see," he smiled slowly. "The other project."

"What other project?" I frowned.

"The one with the big brown eyes and the most perfectly shaped shoulders known to womankind," he laughed openly at me. "Project Redhead."

"Fuck you, Thomas," I scowled, taking a swig of my coffee and immediately spitting it back into the cup. It was stone cold. Fuck's sake, how long had I been sitting there? I looked back up to see Thomas's smile had grown more gentle. He sat down opposite me and took my hand in his.

"It's ok to like her Naomi," he said.

"How do you know I like her?" I said defensively.

"Because I haven't seen you look at anyone like that since Stacey Mathiesson."

He really did know me too well.

"Stacey who?" I sighed, admitting defeat.

"Wow," said Thomas. "That bad?"

"That bad," I confessed. "I can't stop thinking about her."

He gave my hand a reassuring squeeze.

"It's a small place," he said, attempting to comfort me. "Maybe we'll find her again."

"We better bloody had do, Exploro Boy," I said.

Thomas held up his hands in apology. He was one of life's natural explorers. It was his fault we'd decided to find our way back to the cottage across the dunes at the back of the beach. Why we hadn't gone back the way we had come. Back up the cliff path where my eyes had followed my goddess until all that I could make out of her was a tiny flash of red. Back past the lecherous boy in the ticket shed. Back to the grassy car park where a fabulous redhead might just be having a picnic by her car. No, we had to stomp around in the middle of some grassy wilderness, disturbing the wildlife and not finding any beautiful girls at all.

"Come on," said Thomas. "She looked like she does a lot of swimming. We can go to the beach again tomorrow. Now we have to go and meet Bob."

Bob was the guy who was going to take us out in his boat so we could conduct our study. He was more than a little bit scary. He was in his late fifties and sported the most amazingly ineffective comb over it had ever been my misfortune to witness. His face was brown and weathered as befitted a man who had lived his life on the sea, and his thick Welsh accent meant that I could barely understand a word he said. Thomas had no chance. He was forced to smile and nod with his charming smile, and then look at me behind Bob's back for a translation. But Bob did hold one major advantage. He was cheap, and he was pretty much all we could afford.

I almost changed my mind when I saw the boat. We'd gone down to the harbour at Port Eynon, a little fishing town around the headland from Rhossili. We met Bob at the pub, which was a little alarming as he looked like the pint he was nursing wasn't his first. And then he led us down to the moorings. Lurking between the traditional fishing boats and a few more modern pleasure craft lay Bob's pride and joy, the Rosie Malone, named after a hooker he'd met in Dublin, he reliably informed us. To say that Rosie was looking a little past her prime would have been kind, and I reiterated to Bob that we were going to have to go out into the open sea, and try to stick to our schedule regardless of the weather conditions.

"Oh don't you worry there. Blondie," he grinned at me, patting me on the head. "Rosie'll look after you good and proper."

I looked at Thomas, who merely shrugged in response. What other choice did we have? I had been my usual thorough self when researching our options, and financially Bob was pretty much it.

"So, students is it?" he said, once we had cast off and were sailing out of the harbour. "You'll be after a bit of the old wacky baccy then. I can do you a lovely deal, so."

Oh God. Our drunken boat captain was now trying to deal us drugs.

"Um, no thanks Bob, we're sorted," I told him.

"Oh you don't want to be smoking that rubbish they sell you in the big city. Ours is pure quality. Tell you what, why don't I skin one up for us now? Try before you buy sort of thing."

I looked at Thomas in horror. What the fuck were we supposed to do with this guy? I was glad I had brought my own copies of the sea charts and GPS with me. I wouldn't put it past him to take us to completely the wrong place.

"Unfortunately, we do have to work today," smiled Thomas, saving the day. "So we had better keep our minds clear. Thank you for your kind offer. Maybe on the way back."

"He's a lovely polite boy isn't he?" said Bob, winking at me. "You've done alright for yourself there Missy, so you have."

I was about to correct him in his assumption that Thomas and I were a couple, but then I thought better of it. During our first meeting in the pub, Bob's eyes had been firmly rooted to my tits. Fuck me, this was going to be a long day.

Thankfully, Bob settled down once we had reached our destination, which somewhat amazingly he managed to get us to, without seeming to consult any instruments.

"Know these waters like the back of my hand," he assured me. "Human GPS, they call me."

Fortunately, my actual GPS agreed with him and we could set about our work. To be fair it wasn't exactly a strenuous business, the real slog would come about in the analysis. We were taking water samples at various depths, and at various times of the day in the currents that we knew flowed between the refineries and the feeding grounds for the whales. We also had our pride and joy, a device that we could lower into the water with motion sensors and a live video feed to the surface, so that we could identify and catalogue any sea life that passed through its field of vision. It had been specially built for us by a friend of ours at the university. Such a thing would normally have cost thousands, but JJ had managed to knock it together for only a few hundred quid.

But most of the day involved just waiting, and though I frantically busied myself fussing over a few initial figures and results, I knew in my heart that we had far too little data for my fussing to mean anything at all, and I was inevitably left with time on my hands. Time to think. And that meant…

I groaned internally the first time she invaded my senses again. Could you try and cut me a break here, Red? But there was no resisting her. No matter how much I struggled she returned to haunt me. As if she'd actually managed to plant herself into my neural pathways, and I could almost sense her as much as I imagined her. Eventually I gave in, and just sat back and enjoyed it. To be fair, I could think of worse ways to spend a day than drifting about on a boat with my best friend and a crazy old man, thinking about a beautiful girl.

Thomas had to wake Bob up from a peaceful snooze when it was time to go back. About halfway back to shore, he started banging on about the bloody drugs again.

"Done all your measuring, have you love?" he asked when I shut the lid of my Macbook. I nodded in assent.

"Well you can have a little bifter then, can't you girlie?" he said. "I can promise you, you won't regret it."

Somehow I knew he wasn't going to let it lie. So I gave in. Better to have a toke on whatever shit weed he was trying to fob us off with. Then we could say we didn't like it and have done. But instead of some crappy bag of green, Bob pulled out what looked like some extremely high quality resin, the like of which we hadn't seen round uni for quite a while.

"This'll blow your head off, sweetheart," smirked Bob, handing me the lit spliff.

Yeah right, I though cynically. Probably cut to fuck.

I couldn't have been more wrong. From the first toke I realised that for once, Bob had not been spinning us a yarn. This shit was seriously fucking strong, and after a couple more drags I was well on my way to being high.

"Wow," I said as I passed the joint to Thomas. "That is some seriously good shit."

It was a beautiful high, very light and giggly without ever giving you that heavy feeling in your limbs. Bob seemed to make a lot more sense once I was stoned, and by the time we pulled back into the harbour, the three of us were laughing and swapping stories like we'd known each other all our lives. Bob's 'try before you buy' had been a definite winner, and I stumbled off the boat with an eighth in my pocket and a really fucking stupid grin on my face.

A grin that was soon to be plastered rigidly in place through sheer terror, when I realised who exactly had been sitting on the harbour wall reading a book. That was until she had the pleasure of witnessing mine and Thomas's entire stumbling, giggling and ridiculous walk of shame down the jetty.

"Hi there, nice to see you again," she said with a friendly smile, that was so sweet it could make me weep for joy. "I'm Emily."


	4. The Art Of Pining

4. The Art Of Pining

Emily

"Aw fuck," I said, probably for the hundredth time that day. "Fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck."

I had been busy with classes all day, and once I had recovered from the disappointment that the blonde wasn't somehow part of the new intake (yes, I know, but a girl can dream), I had to focus on my responsibilities to my clients. You know, like not letting any of them drown on their first day. There was a crazy blonde girl whose skill did not match up to her enthusiasm, who I thought was going to give me a run for my money on that score, but she was kind of fun. There were a couple of serious types, a couple of girlie girls who obviously were not expecting to actually have to work at anything, a posh chick who had her own equipment all in matching baby blue, and the rest were fairly normal women who just wanted to try something new. But it was hard, you know. Even the foxy dreadlock chick with the Celtic tattoos who I would normally been all over like a rash couldn't hold my attention. Even when she started giving me the eye during the afternoon session. Any time it got a spare second, my mind kept drifting back to yesterday…

I waited in that sodding car park all afternoon, hanging out with Cook, smoking and drinking tea. He seemed genuinely happy to have the company, and avoided saying anything too gross that would have pissed me off and made me leave. But I only ever had one ear on his ramblings anyway, as my eyes constantly scanned across to the little gate that led to the cliff path. But she never came. Oh fuck my life, they must have walked down from Llangennith. Why the fuck hadn't I said something on the beach? At least I could have found out if they were staying around for a while. It wasn't as if I was misreading any signals. I could still feel the delicate shiver of her gaze as it swept across my skin, and I wanted to have her look at me like that again. Like I was precious. I wanted those astonishingly blue eyes all over me again, swiftly followed by her hands and her lips, and the rest of her beautifully naked flesh…

"Aw fuck," I sighed again.

"Still?" said Effy quizzically, setting down two smoothies in front of us.

"Still what?" I said, dragging myself back into the real world as she sat down opposite me.

"Still pining?" she smirked.

"Jesus Effy, you can talk," I raised my eyebrows at her. "Or shall we not mention three fucking years?"

Effy was my best friend, and so of course I ran over here as soon as I could after work to gossip about the blonde bombshell with her. I hadn't made it over the night before, as 'just the one pint' with Cook had turned into a bit of a session. I'd held my tongue about the girl on the beach with him as I knew he'd just rip the piss out of me. It didn't seem like I was doing much better with Effy, although she had no grounds for gloating given her track record.

Effy had drifted onto these shores about three years ago under mysterious circumstances. Pretty much everything about Effy was mysterious, and apart from a few select people, that's the way she liked to keep it. She is stunning – long brown hair that looks gorgeous even when it's a total mess, penetrating blue eyes that seem to know all of your secrets without you uttering a word, and a cool unassailable distance that drives men and women alike into a frenzy. I fancied the hell out of her at first, but it is amazing how unsexy someone can quickly become when all they do is bang on about your wonderful bloody sister. Ask anyone around here and you'll get a dozen different versions of the whys and wherefores of Effy's arrival, but here's the generic version cobbled together from a number of different scripts.

It had been pretty much of an ordinary summer when one day a massive yacht pulled up in the bay. We were used to regular pleasure boats coming and going, but this was something else. It looked like something you'd see moored up in Monte Carlo or St Tropez. Whoever owned it came from Big Money, and we certainly weren't used to seeing that round here. Word gets around quick in a small place like this and soon the village was buzzing about the big boat, and whether some popstar or celebrity had decided to grace us with their presence. The most popular rumour was that Catherine Zeta Jones had decided to pop home for a visit to Mumbles.

But the reality was quite different. It was a family that eventually came ashore, a mother, and her two grown up kids, but they were no ordinary family. They weren't famous, but they certainly made an impression. They waltzed about the place as if they owned it, but although we were used to the behaviour of posh cunty tourists with no manners, this lot were different, especially the mother and son. They had this air about them. They looked… dangerous. And not 'I'll punch you in the face if you spill my pint' dangerous. More like 'step out of line and your entire family will disappear' type dangerous. Their crew appeared to be not so much crew as henchmen, and people very soon began to give them a respectable distance. Nobody knew why they were here, but then again pretty soon nobody wanted to know either. Even the most gobby lads knew not to give them any trouble. But there was one very notable exception.

Katie was waitressing in the local pub back in the days before Dad finally convinced her to join in the family business. It was a busy Friday night when the family we now know to be the Stonems, decided to come for dinner. The other girl who worked there had called in sick, and Katie had been rushed off her feet all night. My sister is what you might call volatile at the best of times, but that night she definitely not in the mood to take anyone's shit. The Stonems had been insufferably arrogant all night, demanding her attention even when she was busy with other clients, and by they time they reached dessert, she was just about at boiling point, especially as the son kept trying to feel her arse whenever she walked by. She was just taking an order from a lovely old couple who were regulars, when the blonde older Stonem woman interrupted her again.

"Oi, Shortstuff," she yelled. "Get me another bottle of wine. And make it something decent. Not like that crap you served us last time."

Katie slammed her notepad down, and all the people on the surrounding tables started to hold their breath. She marched right up to the Stonem table, and folded her arms belligerently across her chest, pushing out her cleavage like a weapon.

"Firstly, my name is not Shortstuff," she fumed. "Secondly, you chose the damn wine, so it's not my fucking fault if it's crap now, is it? And thirdly, I don't care how much money you've got, I'm serving someone else so you'll have to wait your turn."

"Is that so?" said the mother menacingly.

"Yes, it is," said Katie, defiantly.

"You know she's had people kneecapped for less than that," the boy laughed at her, as his mother pulled out a cigarette and lit it up. You could see the 'crew' at the surrounding tables start to tense up.

"I'm sorry," said Katie, momentarily plastering on a fake smile. "But I'm afraid you can't smoke that in here."

"I think you'll find that I can do what the fuck I like," sneered the woman. It was the last straw.

"Not in my fucking pub, you can't," exploded Katie. "Now put that fucking fag out, or get the fuck out."

"Who do you think you are, little girl?" said the woman, shaking her head, and going to take another drag.

Katie snatched the cigarette out of her mouth, and ostentatiously put it out in her own dessert.

"I'm Katie Fucking Fitch," she spat. "Who the fuck are you?"

The whole pub fell silent. The Stonem's goons stood up, ready to do whatever they were asked to with the troublesome girl, but Katie didn't flinch. She held eye contact with the matriarch not willing to back down. No one breathed for the several seconds, until Anthea Stonem laughed.

"I like you, Katie Fucking Fitch," she said. "You've got balls."

The tension in the room imploded, and Anthea ordered rounds of drinks for everyone in the pub. When the family eventually went, they left Katie a three hundred pound tip. It was Jonno Briggs who filled us in on the rest. He had been looking at Effy the whole time, for no other reason than he thought she was gorgeous. No one had seen Effy smile, or even express any other emotion the whole time they'd been here. She hadn't exuded the same level of swagger as the rest of her family. In fact she had mostly looked bored. But Jonno said he had never seen anything so beautiful as the way Effy's face lit up, when Katie had stood up to her mother. He said it was the kind of smile you'd expect to see on a saint, when they'd received a revelation from the heavens. And that she didn't stop smiling for the rest of the night.

The next morning I was cycling down by the harbour, heading for breakfast at Rita's café, which was my refuge from my mother's atrocious cooking, when I stopped to see the big boat sailing away. A glance to my right revealed that I was not alone. Standing leaning on the harbour wall watching it go, was Effy Stonem herself. She must have sensed my presence, as she looked up quickly, and her eyes shone for a moment before her face was clouded with a frown.

"You're not her," she said.

Even though I was, for the moment, unaware of the previous night's events, I still guessed she must have been talking about Katie.

"I'm her sister," I shrugged.

"Sweet," said Effy. "Buy you breakfast?"

I'd watched it all since then. The thrill on Katie's face when she got her first bunch of flowers from 'a mystery admirer'. Her growing excitement when said admirer kept lavishing beautiful gifts on her. Her shock and disappointment when Effy finally confessed it was her. I watched Katie fucking around to put Effy off. I watched Effy fucking around to distract herself from Katie. There were even some rumours that they'd kissed one a big New Year's Eve night out in Cardiff, but nothing ever seemed to come of it. They seemed to have come to some kind of truce now and they got on well enough. I think deep down Katie actually liked the fact that someone loved her so completely, she just wished it was the other party in their ridiculous triangle of unrequited love.

"Mine's not pining," stated Effy. "It's love."

I rolled my eyes at her.

"She doesn't want you, Eff," I said, and not for the first time. "When are you going to move on?"

"You don't move on from Katie Fitch," said Effy, as if it were some fundamental law of the universe.

"Fine," I said, giving up on her. "But this is not helping me with my lost blonde problems."

"Her name's Naomi," smirked Effy.

"What?" I said, putting down my smoothie and leaning towards her urgently. "Damn you Effy Stonem, what do you know?"

"I may have certain information," replied Effy coolly.

It didn't surprise me. Effy made it her business to know everything that was going on around here, and she would certainly get wind of it if a couple like those two were staying around for more than a day or two.

"Spill," I said.

"What's in it for me?" shrugged Effy.

"Whatever," I said. "What do you want?"

"Will you put in a good word for me with your sister?"

"Effy, I've put an entire dictionary of good words in for you with my sister. It doesn't bloody change anything."

Effy just stared me out until I relented. She had me by the balls and she knew it.

"Fine," I huffed.

"Her name's Naomi Campbell," said Effy.

"Oh fuck off bitch," I said, shoving her in the shoulder. "Stop fucking with me."

"I'm not," countered Effy. "That's her name. Tall, bottle blonde, steel blue eyes that could 'melt a man's heart in a moment'. Gorgeous black boyfriend?"

"He's not her boyfriend," I said with certainty.

"How do you know?"

"Because she looked at me," I mumbled, knowing that this would not be enough to impress Effy.

"Oooooh," said Effy sarcastically. "She looked at you, eh? Must be love"

"She looked at me the way you look at Katie," I blurted.

All hint of cynicism fell from Effy's face in an instant.

"I sold some gear to Bob the Rental last night. Said he'd got himself a nice little earner renting the boat to some students doing a marine biology project. Described your two to a tee. He was taking them out today, in fact. Said they probably wouldn't be back till around sixish. So if you happened to be hanging round in the harbour…"

I checked the time on my phone. Ten to five. I had better get down there now just in case they came back early. I gulped down the rest of my smoothie, and ran to the other side of the table, grabbing Effy and kissing her on the head.

"I fucking love you, Effy Stonem," I said.

"Yeah well just remember to pass on your opinion of my magnificence to Katie," she laughed.

"I will big you up like you're a goddess," I told her as I hurried towards the door.

"Oh and Emily, be cool," said Effy. "They're here for two months."

My heart was hammering as I ran down to the harbour to see if Bob's boat was there, and I did a little dance of joy when I saw they were still out. I bobbed into the second-hand bookshop and bought myself a legitimate excuse to just be lurking round on the harbour wall. You're such a fucking stalker, I laughed at myself as I settled in for my vigil, but damn that girl is seriously stalkable. I tried to actually concentrate on my book, but it was impossible when my head would shoot up at the slightest little noise on the off chance it would be them. Forty minutes later and three pages in, I heard the sound of an engine shot through with the most beautiful sounds of laughter drifting back into the harbour. Somehow I managed to restrain myself from running down the jetty to Bob's berth. Be cool, be cool, be cool, I muttered under my breath, as Bob brought the boat in home. But as soon as the two students lurched onto the jetty, I knew I would be the only winner in the coolness stakes tonight. Naomi Campbell and her friend were stoned. Seriously fucking stoned. I remembered Effy had sold Bob some gear, well it looked like Bob had passed it on and Effy's stuff was not to be taken lightly. The pair of them giggled and stumbled up the jetty like fools, completely delightful fools, setting each other off with the music of their laughter until at one point they had to stop and cling onto each other to stop themselves from crying with the hysteria of it all. I half readied myself to dive in and save them if one of them ended up in the water. Miraculously they made it back to dry land, and I found myself smiling almost as much as they were. Naomi Campbell was an adorable stoner, and her smile was doing funny things to my heart. She was so fucking beautiful, but all I wanted right then was the chance to sit next to her and listen to her talk. I had time. I could be cool.

Naomi froze when she looked up and saw me, and I saw her poor stoned brain trying to reel itself in so she could cope.

"Hi there, nice to see you again," I smiled sweetly. "I'm Emily."

Naomi just grinned at me helplessly. It was the boy who spoke first.

"I'm Thomas," he said, in a gorgeous French African accent. "So glad to meet you."

"Likewise," I replied, accepting his extended hand.

This seemed to spur Naomi into action.

"I'm stoned," she said. "Um, Naomi. I'm Naomi."

"Stoned Naomi? Nice name," I smiled.

"Um..shit… um," she mumbled.

"It's ok, we've all been there," I said sympathetically. "Effy's gear is legendary."

"His name is Bob," offered Naomi helpfully.

"Are you staying in the area long?" I asked, deciding not to reveal the true extent of my stalking powers.

"We are here for two months," replied Thomas, who seemed considerably more coherent than his friend. "We are students on a science project."

"Measurinf fish, and shit," added Naomi.

God, she was so cute, I wanted to kiss her there and then.

"Well, you should come down to the Golden Lion tonight," I said, making sure to address both of them. "A friend's band is playing, so there will be quite a few people there. I can introduce you to everyone."

"That would be most excellent," replied Thomas.

I looked back over to Naomi to see if she had taken my bait, only to find that she was staring at me again.

"Lovely," she murmured.

She could have been talking about the invitation, but I got the distinct impression that with the drugs impeding all her social filters, she was simply talking about me. I had to get out of there, before I blew my new found cool.

"Great, well I'll see you later then, about nineish?"

"Lovely," repeated Naomi, and I swear my heart changed shape.


	5. A Collapsible Plan

5. A Collapsible Plan

Naomi

Two cold showers and several coffees later and the world was still a little fuzzy round the edges. I was standing outside the door of the Golden Lion doing deep breathing. She asked me out. She asked me out. She asked me fucking out. Well ok, she didn't so much ask me out as invite the pair of us to come along and meet all her friends, but still, she wanted to know me, despite how much of a fool I'd made of myself at the harbour. And she was sweet, and she was lovely, and she was Emily. My sweet, lovely Emily. Ok so not exactly mine exactly. But she was here, and she was real, and oh my fucking God, how was I going to get through the night when I couldn't even get through the door?

"Calm down, Naomi," said Thomas soothingly. "You're going to hyperventilate."

He pulled me into a friendly hug. Thank fuck for Thomas. I was so lucky I had him. He had totally saved the situation down on the quay. And he was here for me now, being the calm voice of reason, whilst I freaked out like a fifteen year old on a first date.

"It's ok, Naomi," he said. "I've got your back. But anyway, she seems like a really nice person."

Yes, a really nice person. Just being friendly, like friendly people do.

I needed to stay calm. I needed a plan.

Step one. Be casual, take an interest in her friends and all the rest of the people round here. Don't be a stalky nerd.

Step two. Make sure she knows that Thomas isn't your boyfriend.

Step three. Engage her in stimulating conversation. Use your wit and your brains to fascinate and intrigue her.

Step four. Get her alone. Ask her outside for a smoke or something.

Step five. Pretend she's got something in her hair. Step closer. Close the distance between you. Pull her into a gorgeous kiss. Put your tongue down her throat. Get your hands on her tits. Drive her wild with passion. Take her home. Get her naked. Make her scream your name as you fuck her until dawn….

No shit no, Naomi. Jesus, what is wrong with your fucking brain?

"Are you ok, Naomi?" asked Thomas, as I screamed aloud in frustration.

"I think I'm turning into a pervert," I told him.

"Or maybe you're just in love," he smiled.

"How can I be in love? I've only met her twice," I moaned.

"Well, if you don't actually go inside, you'll never get to find out," he said. "Take the plunge, remember?"

"Ok," I said, straightening my clothes and fussing with my hair. "Take the plunge."

"That's my girl," grinned Thomas.

It was the same pub we'd had dinner in the night before, but tonight it was a lot more crowded. Guess this band were good then. Or maybe they were shit but there really was fuck all else to do round here. We'd only been here a couple of days, but I was already able to pick out a few familiar faces. There was really only one face my ever expectant eyes were waiting to see, and I immediately started scanning the bar to find her. I thought I saw her across the room, and started making my way over, but shit, she certainly looked way more dressed up than I'd expected for a band night down the local. Oh fuck, a rush of adrenalin hit as the thought sped into my brain, maybe she dressed up for me… Or Thomas. Shit, maybe she dressed up for Thomas. I got a little closer, but her hair, would she really have had time to die her hair purple, since we'd seen her on the quay? I mean, it was nice and everything, but that red had been so awesome…

"Emily?" I said hesitantly, trying to make my way past the two big blokes standing between us.

"I'm not Emily, you dick," said the woman, turning to look me up and down in annoyance. "Who the fuck are you?"

I stood there with my mouth open. Why had I managed to turn into such a socially inept clown the moment I'd set foot on this peninsula? She looked like Emily, but she wasn't Emily, and she certainly wasn't sweet, and lovely, and friendly.

"I'm Thomas, so pleased to meet you," came the voice of my guardian angel from behind my shoulder, and the demeanour of the she-devil that had been cloned from Emily changed from hostile to friendly in an instant.

"I'm Katie," she smiled, in a smile that I was sure she reserved for attractive boys. "So very pleased to meet you too."

She held out her hand, and giggled in a feminine manner when he took it and kissed the back of it.

"Enchante, Mademoiselle," he said, sending Katie into further spasms of delight.

Jesus Thommo, you cheesy fuck, do you want a trowel to lay on that half baked faux smoothness, or what?

"I see you've met my sister then," the beautiful husky voice of the sea goddess said softly in my ear, and I was suddenly begging for even an ounce of Thommo's half baked smoothness.

"You might want to keep an eye on your boyfriend though," she grinned.

"He's not my boyfriend," I blurted out.

Oh well, that was step two dealt with. Shame I'd somehow managed to miss out on step one.

"He might want to pretend he is, if Katie gets her claws out," she laughed.

"Thomas and Naomi are marine conservationists," she said, raising her voice so that Katie could hear. "They're going to be around for a couple of months, conducting a study of pollution levels in the current channels."

"Ooh, sounds complicated," said Katie, keeping her attention fixed firmly on Thomas. "You must be ever so clever…"

Emily shook her head and smiled at me again.

"I think I'm just going to let her run with this one for a bit," she smirked. "We can come back and rescue him later. Can I get you a drink?"

"Yeah, that would be good," I mumbled.

Yeah, that would be good? Fuck me, I am a scientist. I am articulate and

intelligent. I am a modern, powerful woman and I can hold my own against pretty much anyone. So why does this girl keep reducing me to the level of a buffoon? She grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the bar, and I took total leave of my senses. She was touching me. All the blood rushed from my head, and pulsated round my palm where my flesh was meeting hers. She was touching me, and I never wanted it to stop.

"Oi Gav," she yelled with surprising volume and confidence at the barman. "Get us a pint of cider mate. And something for the lady…"

Both Emily and Gav looked at me expectantly. Shit this was the part where I was supposed to say something, but my brain couldn't make the connection between thought and speech, because all it's resources were still celebrating the fact that she was touching me.

"Naomi?" she said dropping my hand and waving hers in front of me. "You still stoned?"

"Vodka," I managed to force out, now that the connection had been broken.

"Just vodka?" said Emily, raising an eyebrow.

"And lemonade," I said quickly. "Vodka and lemonade."

We grabbed our drinks from Gav, and looked for somewhere to sit or stand.

"Hey Emily," called a massive lad with a buzz cut as we passed him by. "Who's your lovely new assistant?"

"Fuck you, Jonno," bantered Emily playfully, heading for a door at the back of the pub. I willingly followed her through it.

"They're a funny old bunch," she said as she leant against the wall in the back porch outside the pub. "But they're alright once you get to know them."

I looked around to find we were alone. Shit, step four already. Emily kept messing with my plan, and I hadn't even had the chance to impress her with my stimulating conversation. Emergency protocol one. Have a cigarette. I pulled out my pack and offered her one, but she declined.

"I only tend to smoke when I'm wasted," she grinned. "So where are you staying? Are you in a BnB or something?"

Oh God thank you, small talk. Something I could possibly cope with.

"No, we've hired a cottage quite close to the beach actually," I said, forming my first entire sentence since I had met her.

"Oh well that's better, I suppose. You'll be able to party."

"We came here to work, not to party," I said.

Oh fuck, that came across as really pompous. She's not going to want to get to know me if she thinks I'm a funsponge.

"Oh, yeah, of course, right," she said, looking a little crestfallen.

Fuck, I had to rescue this and NOW.

"Though it doesn't hurt to blow off a little steam every now and again," I said attempting a casual smile.

"Is that what you were doing in Bob's boat this afternoon?" she smirked.

I had to laugh, the cheeky little minx.

"Busted," I said holding up my hand in admission, and relaxing for the first time in her presence. "So what about you? I'm guessing you live round here."

"Yeah, I work in the family business Fitchwater Watersports. 'Swim like a Fitch!'"

"What?"

"Exactly," laughed Emily. "Our surname's Fitch, and my parents have an irrational love of pun based marketing slogans."

I didn't take the piss. My mind was too busy running the words 'Emily Fitch' over and over again in my head.

"My Dad does all the boys toys stuff like paragliding and jet skis, Mum teaches windsurfing, and my little brother James is a devil in a sea kayak. I run the surf school and Katie takes care of the sunbathing…"

"They have classes for that?" I said stupidly.

"No," laughed Emily, finally looking at me like I was a nitwit. "But if they did, Katie would be your girl. Actually, she runs our retail department, and she's pretty fucking good at it. Particularly making surfy boys part with their money."

"Do you like it?" I asked her.

"I love it," she told me, her eyes lighting up when she told me about how she was in the sea every day. She was enchanting. I could have listened to her talk all night. Her voice was so sexy she could have turned me on reading excerpts from Deuteronomy, but she was so animated and excited when she talked about what she did and about the wonders of the local seascape I began to seriously doubt my earlier assertion that I couldn't possibly be in love. Step five began to transform itself from fantasies of getting laid to the simple desire to keep hearing this woman talking for the rest of my life. I hadn't even noticed that the porch had filled up with people, until a loud call interrupted the divine music of my true love's voice.

"Emilio! Blondie!" yelled the car park boy, waving a half empty pint in our direction. "Get me my sunglasses. My eyes are suffering from an overload of hotness here, ladies."

"Hi Cook," laughed Emily, shaking her head. Surely she wasn't friends with this bozo?

"You might wanna get back inside, Blondie," he said. "I think your fella's about to be eaten alive."

"He's a big boy," I said. "He can look after himself."

There was no way I was leaving Emily with this sleazy Cook character. His eyes lit up and he waggled his eyebrows at us.

"All the more for the Cookie Monster then. How about it ladies? Fancy a threesome? I could be the meat in your sandwich."

Emily poked him in the stomach.

"Even if I was up for it, I'd have to knock you back for that old cliché," she told him. "And anyway, last time I checked, Hell hadn't actually frozen over."

"Yet again, she wounds me," said Cook, staggering back dramatically as if Emily had dealt him a fatal blow. "When are you going to give me a chance, Ems?"

"Better start saving up for the operation," she winked at him.

Operation? What? Ems? How fucking cute was that? Why did he get to call her Ems? I wanted to call her Ems.

"Guess I have to console myself elsewhere," sighed Cook. "Gotta love these women's surf courses of yours, Ems. Lotsa fresh totty for da Cookie."

"You are disgusting, Cook."

She cuffed him round the head, but there was still no malice in her voice.

"Excuse me?" said Cook, feigning offence. "Pot? Kettle? Colour naming arrangement? What about that dreadlock chick who's been giving you puppy dog eyes all night?"

"She's not my type," said Emily hurriedly.

"What do you mean?" laughed Cook. "She's totally your type. You love those alternative chicks. What was it you said? 'Girls with tattoos make me totally horny'. Remember that one with the pink hair? We could see you two coming for miles."

"Whatever Cook," said Emily, her voice showing irritation with him for the first time. "We should go inside, the band will be on soon."

Emily pushed back on in without waiting for either of us. Emily who is gay. Gay Emily. Sweet, lovely Gay Emily. I felt the grin start pulling my face apart as I thought of it. Emily is gay. I wonder where the nearest tattoo shop is…

The sound of Cook's raucous laughter punched into my daydream.

"Oh it's like that is it?" he howled. "Get in, Blondie. Just make sure ya get me pictures."

"What the fuck, Cook?" I frowned at him.

"Ya just found out Ems is a muff monkey, and now you're smiling like a beauty queen. It ain't rocket science, babe."

I didn't have an answer for him, so I abandoned him and went back inside. I looked for Emily in the crowd, but she was so fucking tiny, it wasn't easy. Suddenly any girl in the place who looked even slightly alternative had become my enemy, so when I caught her talking to a devastatingly beautiful girl, with backcombed hair, ripped clothing and dark smoky eye make up, I was just about ready to break. I watched in horror as Emily put her hands in the girl's hair, pressed their foreheads together and stared deep into her eyes. Clearly, the dreadlock chick held no interest for her because she already had this. The girl was fucking beautiful, how the fuck was I supposed to compete with that? So what if Emily was gay? She also had a ridiculously hot girlfriend. I was just about to go and throw myself off the cliff, when I saw Emily sweep her hand through her own hair, and search around the room. She didn't look turned on. She looked worried.

On instinct, I went straight to her. If Emily was hurting, then I was hurting too. Girlfriend or no girlfriend, I wanted to help her.

"What's wrong?" I said once I had reached her.

"It's Effy," she said, looking down at the brunette. "She's completely fucked."

"Isn't it a little early to be that drunk?" I asked.

Emily shot me a look.

"She's not drunk," she said.

I looked over at the girl who had lurched into Emily's arms. Her pupils were practically eclipsing her irises.

"Jesus, she's really wasted," I said.

"She doesn't normally get like this," frowned Emily. "I mean she gets high. A lot. But she normally knows how to handle herself. Effy, what have you taken?"

"New batch," murmured Effy. "Got to test the merchandise. It's good customer service."

"How many?" insisted Emily.

"Just the one," said Effy. "Until I got here and saw that."

Both Emily and I followed her gaze to where Katie and Thomas were still obviously flirting.

"Fuck's sake, Effy. Why do you do this to yourself? You know what she's like," said Emily.

"Hey, I'm just having fun," said Effy. "Just like Katie's having fun. We're all just having fun."

"You might want to get your friend out of that," said Emily, looking at me. "Katie's just using him. There's some fucked up little mind games going on round here. You wouldn't want to get involved."

"It's all his fault," said Effy menacingly, furrowing her brow and smouldering with anger.

"Hey, Thomas hasn't done anything," I said defensively.

"She doesn't mean, Thomas," said Emily.

"I need the loo," said Effy, getting to her feet remarkably efficiently considering the state she was in.

"I'll come with you," said Emily.

"I'm not a child, Em," said Effy disdainfully.

"Give me your drugs then, Eff," insisted Emily.

Effy shrugged, and discreetly handed her a small bag.

"All of them," said Emily firmly.

Effy rolled her eyes, and stuck her hands out to the sides, daring Emily to frisk her. To my surprise Emily did just that. I found myself considering acquiring a serious drug habit just so I could undergo such treatment at the hands of Emily Fitch. Especially when she reached inside Effy's bra and pulled out another wrap. Effy smirked, and my heart sank as their physical familiarity led me once again to the conclusion that they were lovers. Effy was still out of it, but she seemed to be gaining a measure of control, as she blew Emily a kiss and disappeared in the direction of the ladies. Emily sat down heavily, and let out a long sigh. I sat down beside her, and put my arm around her shoulder.

"Is she going to be ok?" I asked gently.

"Yeah," said Emily wearily. "She's always ok. She does a lot of drugs, but she knows what she's doing with them. She's fucking hard as nails, apart from one devastating weakness."

"What's that?"

"Katie."

"Katie?"

"Yep, Katie. She's completely in love with her. Has been for years."

"Katie?" I repeated, seeking clarification for something I was finding hard to believe.

"Katie does have her good side," shrugged Emily. "But she's not interested. She's totally into Freddie."

"So why is she hitting on Thomas?"

"To try and make him jealous, I guess. Not that it's going to work. Freddie is infatuated with Effy, but Effy hates him because she thinks he's keeping her from Katie."

"That's fucked up," I said trying not to laugh, but Emily caught me out and started giggling herself.

"Personally, I think they should all just get it on in a big bisexual threesome, and have done. Then the rest of us could stop getting dragged into their drama."

Oh God, was that the kind of stuff she was into? Is that why she didn't tell Cook to fuck off? Have they done that kind of thing before? Oh fucking brain, stop thinking, stop thinking.

"So who's this Freddie then?" I asked.

Before Emily had time to answer a loud crashing guitar chord, made my head spin round towards the stage. At the front of it stood a tall handsome boy with a cheeky lopsided grin and an old beat up guitar.

"Hey everybody," he said. "Are you ready to make some noise?"

The response from the punters in the crowd was a mixture of enthusiasm and apathy, apart from one.

"Fucking Freddie," growled Effy, having mysteriously reappeared beside us. She started heading towards the stage. I noticed she had a half empty vodka bottle in her hand.

"No, Effy,' said Emily firmly' leaping into her friend's path. "We are not going to bash Freddie's head in with a vodka bottle tonight."

I looked at Emily in alarm. Was this actually a possibility? Ems shrugged back at me apologetically.

"I think I'd better get her home," she sighed. "I'll see you round though, yeah? I'm at the beach most days, or you can find me if you Google Fitchwater."

"Swim like a Fitch," I offered by way of a goodbye, earning myself the most wonderful peal of Emily laughter.

"I will," she said, twinkling her eyes at me.

She didn't leave. Well, obviously she did, but she held my gaze for way too long before she did so. In fact it was only the sound of Effy threatening to 'wrap that fucking guitar round Freddie's neck' that caused her to look away from me. And I looked too. I ignored the band on stage, as I blatantly checked out her ass whilst she dragged Effy away from the love triangle of doom. So my plan had been shot to shit, but Emily Fitch was gay. Effy was not her girlfriend. And at the very least, she wanted to be my friend. The rest I could work on. Time to go and rescue Thomas from the evil twin.


	6. Someone Who Cares

**A big hello and thanks from both me and Cat to everyone who is reading and enjoying this story. I know I am enjoying writing it, I made myself smile for days when I thought up 'Swim like a Fitch'.**

**Cat has had some good news this week, but progress is slow and she does get very bored being stuck in the hospital. So if any of you lovely lot feel like following her on Twitter and maybe even having a chat, her Twitter name is Cat_tastrophic (obviously you have to put an 'at' sign in front of that but this formatting won't let me do it here)**

**Enjoy**

**.**

**.**

6. Someone Who Cares

Emily

When I woke up I was in a bed that was gently swaying, and a slender arm was thrown around my waist from behind. As I stirred, I felt the body nuzzle closer into my back. A sleepy contented sigh issued from her throat, and I felt light kisses begin to adorn the back of my neck. Here we go again. I squirmed away from her, and turned round.

"Wake up, Effy. Wrong twin," I told her.

"Wha..?" she murmured sleepily. "Katie?"

"Nope, not Katie," I said firmly.

Effy's eyes shot open.

"Shit. Sorry. I was dreaming," said an alarmed Effy, scooting back to give us some distance.

"Yeah, I got that," I said, squeezing her hand to show I wasn't mad at her.

"Why is the room swaying?" she asked me.

"Cause we're on your fucking boat, you idiot?" I teased her.

"How did we get here?" she asked.

.

.

We'd been outside the Lion in the car park. I was trying to call Asif. He wasn't legally a taxi, but being the only Muslim boy on the peninsula he took full advantage of the fact that he didn't drink, by driving the rest of us about the place for a nice little earner. Although I was technically over the limit, I was sure I would have been ok to ride my scooter if it had been just me, but there was no way I was going to be able to handle a flailing and out of control Effy on the back as well.

"Fuck," I hissed as Asif's phone went to voicemail.

"What's up Emily?" a female voice asked me.

It was Linda, whose parents owned one of the local campsites.

"Can't get hold of Asif," I shrugged.

"I think he's got family over from Cardiff," said Linda. "That's going to be everyone fucked for transport for the next few days. You'll have to watch yourself on that scooter of yours with all the extra drunks on the road."

"Tell me about it," I said, rolling my eyes. This was the country, and with no public transport people's attitudes to drink driving were a little more slapdash. And things always got worse when Asif had family over.

"Little bit early to be leaving," said Linda. "Surely things are just starting to kick off?"

"Yeah well…" I said, pointing over to where Effy was leaning against the wall, head lolling dangerously from side to side.

"Katie got herself a new boyfriend then, has she?" said Linda. "Or did Freddie finally wise up and see who really loved him?"

"She was just flirting with some new guy," I shrugged. We had all seen this more times than we cared to remember.

"Love's cruel," sighed Linda. "It's a shame she didn't fall for you eh? That would have been perfect."

People were always trying to pair me and Effy off. They liked things to be neat. I liked girls, Effy liked girls, it all made perfect sense in their heads. Except that Effy didn't like girls, she liked a girl. She loved her, but the girl didn't love her back. Linda was right. Love was cruel. Love was an utter shit. It didn't match things up nicely and have everyone pair off two by two to a happy ever after like a Hollywood movie, or some kind of fucking celestial dating agency. Love was a fucking mess, and it left people broken and lonely. It was only ever sheer fucking blinding luck if you ever got away with it.

But did that make the blindest bit off difference to the way I felt now? Did it fuck. Did it mean that I wasn't secretly hating my best friend, because I had to be out here looking after her, instead of being back in the pub putting subtle moves onto a gorgeous blonde? I don't think so.

"Do you want me to give you a ride back to the boat?" said Linda.

Thank god for friends, eh? In the end, they were what mattered. Love was a fucking lottery, but your mates would always be there for you.

"Cheers Linda, you're a lifesaver," I said.

For most of the ride back to Effy's, I stared out of the window whilst she slumped uselessly against me, and reflected on the evening's events with an ever-increasing smile playing over my lips. First big bonus of the night – Naomi had shown up. Secondly she had been fantastically fucking cute, all tongue-tied and nervous. Years of being mates with Effy had taught me how to observe and read the tiniest nuances of people's body language, and there was certainly enough going on in that delicious body to make me believe that day on the beach had not been a fluke. Ok, so I was working it, getting up close to her and throwing her little flirty smiles, not being too overt, but giving her plenty of time to react. And I had seen the little shivers running down her spine when I had used my sexy voice to whisper something in her ear. I had noticed how she hadn't moved away when I had sneaked over the boundaries of her personal space. How her eyes had fixed on me when I was talking, even about the most banal of shit. She hadn't done a runner after Cook's none too subtle outing of me, in fact she had come after me. I could almost hear the cogs in her brain grinding as she tried to work out if Effy was my lover.

Taken as a whole, all these little things were leading quite nicely to a point where Emily was going to get laid. But the thing I kept returning to, the thing that made me smile the most, was the way she had come to comfort me when Effy had gone to the loo. It wasn't a sneaky move when she had put her arm around me. At that point she still didn't know if Effy and I were together. It was an instinctive move on her part. Something you would do for a friend regardless of the circumstances. And it felt fucking good to have her there. Fucking good to have someone else who cared. I probably could have sat there quite happily all night with that arm around me, listening to the band and getting slowly more drunk, laughing with her and getting to know her. Because by the end of the taxi ride I had realised something.

I liked her. Yes, she was fit as fuck, and the force of her attraction to me was an attraction in itself, but it wasn't just that. I liked her. I liked that she was cute when she was stoned. That even though she was obviously very smart, she wasn't arrogant with it. I liked the way she didn't even seem to realise how goddamn fucking gorgeous she was. I liked the way her and Thomas worked together, and that what they were doing meant something. I liked the way that she cared about the marine environment and was trying to do something about it. I liked the way that she cared about Effy even though she could have been a rival. And I liked the way that she cared about me. She seemed like a very genuine person. She seemed good.

Linda's car pulled up at the harbour, and I managed to drag Effy out of the door.

"You going to be alright with her?" said Linda out of her window.

"Won't be the first time," I said resignedly. "Probably won't be the last."

I was expecting Linda to leave, eager to get back to the pub, but she hesitated.

"I don't suppose…" she said, looking slightly guilty.

"What do you want?" I sighed realising her motives were not entirely altruistic.

"Well, it's just that I was hoping to get a pill for tonight, and Jared said he's run out, see."

"Here," I said taking one from the bag that I'd confiscated from Effy earlier. "But be careful, it's a new batch and they're really fucking strong. You're best off taking a half."

"How strong?" asked Linda, pocketing her prize.

"They did that to her," I said, indicating Effy, who was stumbling towards the jetty.

"Christ," said Linda. "I think I'll just take a quarter."

.

.

"Thanks Emily," said Effy, sipping on the cup of coffee I'd brought her in bed. "What would I do without you?"

"Well I know what I would have been doing without you last night, you wanker," I teased.

"Oh fuck," she said, remembering a little more of last night. "The blonde. I totally muff blocked you. I'm so sorry, Ems."

"It's ok," I grinned. "I got my revenge. I took some of your coke and drank some of your booze when we got back here."

"Emily, you know you don't even have to ask to share my shit. But how did it go? Are you going to see her again? Do we sense potential?"

"Oh we definitely sense potential," I said, jumping back on the bed with her.

I texted my assistant Jen to come and pick me up in the company van, and grabbed some fresh clothes. I stayed over at Effy's boat so often I had my own drawer there. It was no secret that Effy had money, but when she had abandoned her old lifestyle, she had left behind all the ostentation that went with it. Her boat was new, and clearly the most expensive one on the harbour, but it was moderately sized, and she chose to live quite simply on it. She didn't have a load of fancy gadgets. She had a small car. She got most of her clothes from the second hand shops and then adapted them to her own unique style. It was as if she didn't want to be associated with who she had been before. So we let her be. Nobody asked too many questions about her life before she came to us, and she slipped quietly into being just another part of the community. All the old boys down the harbour loved her. The women treated her like some poor orphaned waif that needed feeding up. And all their children bought her drugs.

"How's it looking?" I asked Jen, when I jumped into the van next to her.

"The sun is out and the waves are rolling," she smiled. "It's going to be a beautiful day."

She drove us back to Fitchwater HQ, to pick up the boards and the ladies, before heading on down to the beach.

"Morning ladies," grinned Cook, looking like the cat that got the cream as we piled out of the van in the car park.

"Morning Cook," they all replied with varying degrees of enthusiasm, except for posh girl whose face rose up with a hint of a blush.

"Cook, you dog," I whispered in his ear, as the girls got themselves together.

"All the posh birds like a bit of rough," he answered conspiratorially. "You'd do well to remember that, Emilio."

"Well, they don't come much rougher than you, mate," I said punching him in the arm.

"Is Eff alright?" he asked me, changing the subject suddenly. "Heard she pressed the self-destruct button when Katie was doing a number on that Thommo guy."

Despite his obnoxious front, Cook was a good friend too, even though he was one of the guys Effy had messed around when she first got here.

"She'll survive," I told him.

"Doesn't she always?" said Cook.

Survive, yes. But how do you _live_ with a broken heart?

I led my little flock down to the waves, and I could feel Julie, the dreadlock chick's eyes burning holes in my back all the way down the path. I had the top of my wet suit down and tied around my waist, and I could tell she was scoping out my back, and trying to work up the courage to invite me for a night of 'I'll show you mine if you show me yours' tattoo swopping. I let her look. Even though Naomi had effectively sideswiped me from any interest I might have had in her, it was still nice to feel wanted. But as she continued looking as I got suited up, and then kept sneaking glances whenever she could throughout the lesson, I realised that she was seeing me in a totally different way. That the gaze of sexual desire is as complex and intricate as snow. From a distance snow, is just snow. It blankets everything with white and is uniform. But examine it in detail and no two snowflakes are the same, each one an elaborate pattern that differs in a myriad of ways from it's nearest neighbour.

And so it is with lust. On the face of it, it's universal. We have all felt it. We have all experienced it in the gaze of another. But just like the snowflakes, each look was unique. It didn't just carry the message of sex, it also carried that person's history. It carried their joy and their pain, and their hopes and their dreams. It carried their personality and their ambition. It didn't just tell you that they wanted to fuck you, it also spoke of the way they wanted to fuck you, and what they wanted it to mean. When Cook looked at a girl, it was all about getting his dick damp, that explosive moment of shooting his load and nothing else. Even though I was his friend, when I caught him looking at me like that I knew it was nothing more than animal instinct. When Katie looked at a random guy, I could tell she was always searching. Searching for that elusive cocktail of someone that she wanted as much as she wanted Freddie, but who could love her as much as Effy did. When Freddie looked at Effy, he wanted her to love him, but he was so desperate to be inside her, he would have let her fuck him even if she didn't give a damn.

I felt Julie's eyes on me again. There was a girl called Meryl in the group. She was as sweet as pie, but she didn't have the greatest of physical co-ordination, and she was struggling the most out of the whole group. I could see she was getting frustrated, and close to giving up. So I took the biggest board we had, and helped her to swim out back with it. I let us just sit out there for a bit, looking out into the ocean until I sensed she had begun to calm down.

"It's not all about being the best," I told her. "It's about having fun, and about your own personal relationship with the sea. Any ride you enjoy is a good ride. And this one's all for you."

I turned my attention back out to sea, and waited for our wave. When I spotted it I told Meryl to start paddling whilst I helped her from the back. When I felt the surge take us, I slid onto the back of the board. I got quickly to my knees and then encouraged Meryl to do the same. I could see her excitement mountain as she realised she was actually going to be able to stand up for the first time, albeit assisted by me. She tottered nervously, fucking with our balance, but I managed to compensate, keeping us upright on the water until we reached the shallows. When she finally fell off the board, Meryl was laughing with pure delight.

"Emily, you're amazing," she said, dancing through the water to give me a hug.

And that's when I caught Julie eyefucking me again. For that's what it was. Julie clearly wanted me, but it was all about possession. I was the cool thing, the shiny new toy that she wanted to play with. I got the definite impression she could show me a good time, that she would be a dirty, sexy fuck, and until two days ago that would have been enough.

Until her. Until Naomi. Until that beautiful gaze that had left such a deep and lasting impression. Naomi had looked at me with a desire every bit as fierce as any I had known, if not fiercer. Her eyes had roamed over every inch of me with no doubt in my mind as to what she was envisioning doing to me, but she wasn't just taking a two dimensional snapshot. It wasn't just that she was looking at me, it was like she was looking _for_ me. She had seen the whole of me. She has looked at me in context, she had seen who I was and she had seen my relationship with the sea. She had admired my muscles and my form, but it was like she had understood why I was that way and admired that too. It was a gaze filled with wonder, and such humility. She had no intentions of owning me, just a genuine hope that she and I could find a way of sharing, and an amazement at the possibilities that lay open to us if we were ever fortunate enough to meet. Despite the unequivocal filthiness of its intention, her gaze was innocent, and spoke to me of the purest form of connection. I was waist deep in cold water, but still I could feel my pussy clench and tingle at the thought of what it would be like to have sex with such a creature. To be naked and vulnerable and open under that gaze. For a moment I lost myself in her, in how much I wanted her. How I wanted her to take me, and fuck me and fill me up with that beautiful, caring, unpretentious soul.

The gaze that I could most easily relate to hers was the way that Effy looked at Katie. Effy's gaze was so magnificent because deeply entwined with her desire, was a powerful, unconditional love. It was ridiculous to assume that Naomi could love me without even knowing me, so why did it fucking feel that she did? The one thing that differentiated them, was that Effy's gaze was laced with pain as the object of her desire continually and consistently rebuffed her. I thought of seeing that pain in Naomi's perfect blue eyes, and I couldn't fucking bear it. I was going to find her. And I was going to ask her out. And if she wanted me the way she seemed to, I was damn well going to let her have me.

I was smashed out of my reveries, when an unexpectedly large wave hit me in the side of the head and sent me flying. I rolled with it underwater, found my feet and pushed skywards out of the water. I cleared my eyes just in time to see the crazy blonde girl catch a wave and jump to standing for the first time with a cry of "Blimey, this is flippin' whizzer!"

"That's great, Panda," I shouted encouragingly. "Drop your centre of gravity. That's great, now lean your body to the right. No, your other right, Panda. Shit, no Panda, no!"

I was too late. I watched helplessly as Pandora veered straight into the swimmer, and fell off the board, sending it into the air. Even above the roar of the waves you could hear the crack, as the board fell again and connected with the swimmers head, and she disappeared under the water.


	7. Observe And Engage

**Cat got out of bed and took a walk down the corridor today. She wasn't exactly supposed to do it, but she did it anyway. Badass anarchist mothafucka. My kinda girl – go Cat**

**I don't own Skins, but if I can borrow it to make a sick girl happier, then I don't exactly care.**

.

.

7. Observe And Engage

Naomi

I was sat alone in the living room at the cottage, staring at my computer screen but not really taking anything in. The pattern we had decided on for our working schedule, was one day at sea followed by one day at home working on the results. But of course we didn't really have enough results yet to be doing anything of importance so there had been a lot more facebooking and tweeting than actual work. I'd sent an email to our tutor back at uni to let him know that everything had settled into place. I'd made numerous cups of coffee and smoked numerous fags, but it didn't really distract from the fact that I pretty much had nothing to do. I'm not really one of those people who could just say 'fuck it' and pack it in to watch a movie or just go to the pub. If my brain thinks it ought to be doing something then it will have a damn good stab at it, even though I usually end up being paralysed between the two extremes and don't achieve anything or get to have any fun either. But today my mission was even more frantic than usual, because I knew that if I let my guard down even for a moment, I would find myself drowning in her. In Emily.

Thomas had fucked off somewhere. I think he was still annoyed with me for having dragged him away from Katie last night. It was for his own good. Having learned about the love triangle of doom that Katie was mired in, I knew she would only be using him to get herself some kind of distraction. She would take advantage of Thomas's good nature, and leave him broken hearted. I had tried to explain this to him, but he was having none of it.

"You're too cynical, Naomi," he said. "It closes you off and stops you seeing the good in people. Katie was a lovely young lady."

"Mate, she was a bitch until you showed up," I said. "Then she turned on the fucking charm in an instant. It was like she flicked a switch or something."

"Maybe she is just trying to reach out for something," said Thomas.

"You mate, and your gullible little heart," I scoffed. "She's just like all the others. She can pick out a kind-hearted soul, and immediately see how she can use it to her advantage. When are you going to find yourself a nice girl?"

"Perhaps when you stop being such a pussy and actually take a chance on someone," he retorted.

"I'm not a pussy," I countered. "I'm just being smart."

But I was saying it to myself, cause Thomas was already out of the door.

I wasn't being a pussy. I'd gone to the pub hadn't I? I'd talked to her, hadn't I? I hadn't run a mile when she had started flirting with me, or at least I think she had. Fuck, maybe she was just being friendly. I mean I know I have personal space issues, and I know that Emily was flouting them, but maybe that's just how she is. Some people are just that touchy when they're being friendly. I mean look how she was with Effy. She'd shoved her hands down her best mate's bra for God's sake. And she was always punching or poking Cook. She taught surfing, she was a physical person. And those kind of people are always much more tactile. It was probably nothing. I mean she was so fucking beautiful, she could have any girl she liked. What would she want with me? I'm not edgy or alternative, I'm just me, and all I'd ever done was act like an idiot in front of her.

But then there was that look she gave me just before she left, when I found her brown eyes cutting into me, and slicing and dicing any resistance I might have had. I sure if she had asked me to follow her to Vladivostock in that moment I would have gone. I don't like it, it freaks me out. Surely no one person should be able to have that much control over you, should they? Thomas would say it was love, and that it was perfectly fine to feel this way, that that is how love should feel. But what if I couldn't trust her? She was obviously experienced from the way Cook was joking about it. I had seen what loving a Fitch girl had done to Effy. Did I really want to end up like her, wallowing in narcotics just to be able to face the pain? It was ridiculous. It was Stacey Matthieson all over again. Except I'm a grown woman, not some stupid teenager with a crush. I needed to get some focus. I needed to regain some control. I needed another fucking cigarette.

I opened the door to the cottage and smoked whilst I boiled the kettle for yet another cup of coffee. I know I had probably gone way over my limit for the day, but I had to get my brain working properly and to stop spinning round in these stupid fucking circles over a girl. A girl for Christ's sakes. Yes, I know I am gay but it's only a part of me, it's not who I am. There are far more important things that I need to be thinking about here. Trying to stop our planet reaching the tipping point being one of them. I took my coffee outside and sat on the little bench in our garden. Maybe the fresh air would help to clear my head. Beyond the couple of fields I could see in front of me lay the dunes, and beyond that the beach. It was beautiful, so peaceful, and I could hear the sound of the sea from where I sat. But the sea was no longer a thing unto itself. The sea was now welded to the image of Emily the first time I saw her, and that image fired off an electrical shit storm in my brain.

She would be there now, with her class, the water wrapping itself around her as she introduced the other women to the mysteries of the sea. Women who weren't me, and I couldn't fucking stand it. It was like I could hear her calling me, physically drawing me to her with open invitation. She hadn't given me her number, or told me to look her up on facebook. She had told me to come and find her at the sea. Emily Fitch was no ordinary girl, and all the fake-ass hippy bullshit that my mother used to spout, like destiny and karma and soul-mates started spinning round in my head, doing battle with my rational brain, until my rational brain decided on the perfect solution.

There was no point trying to force a sense of control, when it was clear that I did not have one. I did not know what was happening to me, but when you get a set of results in an experiment that you do not understand, you can't just pretend that they didn't happen. You have to investigate, you have to make an active effort to understand. You cannot just sweep them under the carpet and hope that they will go away. No, I had to face this Emily thing head on. I had to find out what the fuck was going on before I could attempt to explain it. I needed to acquire data, and to do that I needed to observe and engage with the subject.

I ran most of the way to the beach, even when my progress became more difficult once I had reached the dunes. I was hyped up on caffeine and nicotine and excited to get started on my more scientific approach to Project Redhead. As I crested the last dune and saw the bay spread out before me, I scanned the waves to find them. There were a few random pods of surfers about, but Emily's must be a larger group. I took a chance that they would be down at the Rhossili end, and headed off to the left to try to find them. It wasn't too hard to spot them in the end. Most of them had wetsuits and boards with the Fitchwater logo and that ridiculous slogan on them, and I smirked at the memory of how cute Ems had looked the first time she had said it. And then I saw her, talking intensely to one of the women in the shallows. She looked completely in her element. Even though I couldn't hear her, I could see she was animated. I could almost feel the enthusiasm as she used her hands and upper body to illustrate what she was saying. The girl she was talking to was hanging on her every word, as if Emily was some kind of sorceress who could give her control of the wave. Emily put her arm around the girl's body as she finished her pep talk, giving her a squeeze of encouragement before sending her back out into the waves. Observation number one – Emily is generally tactile, using physicality to assist communication. Or a tart.

Fucking stop it, Naomi. You are allowing your emotions to impede the observations. But I hoped she wasn't a tart. I really didn't want her to be a tart. Emily turned and dived back into the waves, slicing through the onrushing breakers as if they were nothing at all. Observation two – Emily is really good at swimming. Fuck, she was disappearing from view. I needed to get closer. I changed into my swimsuit and ran down to the water, screeching to a halt as my toes hit the edge of the surf. Fuck, if this thing with Emily was going to go any further, I was going to need to invest in a wetsuit. I did my usual pointless trick of sneaking into the cold liquid bit by bit, needlessly prolonging my torture, despite the fact that logic dictated that Thomas's approach was far superior. As usual, I got stuck once I reached waist height, unwilling to take the final plunge and put my head and shoulders under the water. But then I heard her voice, shouting encouragement at someone and laughing, and my body went into automatic. With no thought for my fear of the cold, I plunged head first into the water. I had to get closer to her.

Which was fucking easier said than done. I don't know how Emily had made it look so easy, but I was getting a right battering trying to get through these waves. My 'on the boat analysing data' vision of my future was getting a serious promotional boost right now. Every time I seemed to be getting somewhere, some massive big fuck off wave would knock me backwards almost as far as I had come. I wasn't that crap of a swimmer, but I was already getting tired. And the jitters I was getting from the stupid amount of caffeine in my body weren't helping either. Shit, why didn't Emily teach badminton or something? That way I could have sat having a fag on some bleachers watching her play. If I'd have had any sense, I would have just given up and waited on the beach for her to finish her class, but the all-new obsessive stalky pervert she had turned me into was determined to carry on. I saw another big breaker coming my way, and tried to do what they did, which was to dive right through it. I was astonished at the peace I found under the water compared to the turmoil above, and was actually feeling quite proud of myself as I breached for air on the other side. But I didn't have much time to congratulate myself, as the next thing I heard was Emily's voice shouting "No, Panda, No." I had only a second to register a blonde girl careering towards me on an out of control surfboard.

If I had had my wits about me I would have just dived and let her sail right over me, looking cool and impressing Emily at the same time. But I did the opposite. I panicked. I started flailing recklessly in attempt to escape and the edge of her board smacked me in the jaw. 'Panda' then fell off, and the next thing I knew I was smacked on the head from behind. I lost my sense of direction and awareness as another breaker hit us, and I was whirled around in its path like a rag doll in a tumble dryer. I was under the water, and I was freaking out. I had no idea which way was up, and my lungs began to tighten in my chest. I flung my arms and legs in all directions, hoping that one of them might propel me to the surface, but it was fucking useless. I was going to fucking drown.

Suddenly I felt my arms being pinned to my sides from behind. I wanted to scream but my lungs would have filled with water. I wanted to fight, but whoever it was that held me had a grip of steel. I could feel them pulling me in one direction, and I could do nothing but comply. Almost instantly, we breached the surface, and I opened my mouth to take a huge gasp of air. I caught half a mouthful of water, and I started to panic again, until my fear was punctured by the most beautiful sound in the universe.

"I've got you," said Emily, one arm still clamped firmly around my body, whilst the other held my head above the water. "Don't fight me Naomi. You're going to be ok. I've got you."

With anyone else I would probably have kept on struggling, but her quiet authoritative tone and the feel of her strong arms around my body made me all too willing to let her take control.

"Ok, now try and breathe normally, Naoms," she said. "I'm going to help you back to the shore. Don't worry about trying to swim, babes. Let me do all the work."

I felt her legs kick off underneath me as she held me on my back above the water. She didn't fight the waves that closed in on us, instead she used them to increase our momentum towards the shore. She kept whispering soothing and encouraging words into my ear, and I felt my body starting to relax under her guidance. She released her vice-like grip on my arms and curled her arm round my waist instead. All of a sudden this terrifying experience had become an extremely pleasurable one instead. I felt completely safe with her, and could allow my thoughts to drift from my own personal survival to how fucking good it felt to have her this close to me. Observation three – Emily's physical presence appears to have a direct correlation to my own sense of wellbeing.

"There we go, all safe and sound," she said as she guided us to our feet in waist deep water.

Is she gonna be alright?" came a distraught Bristol accent from behind my shoulder.

Emily span us round to face a very guilty looking Panda, standing a few feet away, the offending article bobbing about on its leash behind her.

"She's going to be fine, Panda," said Emily in that same calm voice that just made you absolutely believe her. "It was just an accident. Don't let it upset you. You need to go back out there and get straight on another wave. It will all be good."

"If you're sure," said Panda.

"I'm sure," smiled Emily.

Panda wandered back out into the waves, where the other teacher immediately looked after her, and Emily turned back to me.

"So how you actually feeling?" she asked me. "It sounded like a nasty crack. I've been smacked in the head by a board a few times, and it's never exactly pleasant."

"I'm good, I think," I said, unwilling to relinquish the safety of her grasp, but feeling the need to test the truth of my statement. Just as I managed to steady myself and stand on my own two feet, another fucking wave came and knocked me sideways. Before I could fall, however, Emily's arm was round me again. Jesus, I felt like some pathetic damsel in distress, but I wasn't exactly hating the end result.

"Ok, let's get you to the beach," she said, and have a proper check on you."

I had to allow myself a little smile about the thought of nurse Emily giving me a thorough once over, and I slipped my arm around her shoulder as we walked over to the sand. She sat me down, and knelt down in front of me.

"Whereabouts did it hit you?" she asked.

"In the face, and on the back of the head," I said, feeling like a little kid with a grazed knee.

"Well, that's not so bad," she said.

"How do you work that out?" I pouted.

"You're less likely to have gotten a concussion," she grinned, feeling gently round the back of my head.

"Ow!" I moaned, when she hit the spot.

"Yeah, you've got a bump," she grinned. "That's good news as well. Means the swelling is outside of the skull and not inside. I think you're going to pull through Ms Campbell."

She sat down beside me, and we both watched the waves in silence for a while.

"Not going back to class?" I asked her, immediately cursing myself for the suggestion."

"I'm just gonna wait here a while, symptoms sometimes take a while to show up. Let me know if you feel dizzy or nauseous, or experience blurry or tunnel vision."

Are you fucking joking, Emily Fitch? How could I tell her I felt all of those things? Not because of some stupid whack on the head, but because she was sat so close to me. Because she put her arm back round me when she noticed the goosebumps on my flesh. Because our thighs were now touching all the way down. The very thought of her makes me feel dizzy, and my stomach churns over with nerves, because I can't find the words to tell her how fucking beautiful she is. I've had acute tunnel vision for the past two days, because all I can focus on is her. She looked back across at me, and I visibly shivered. I knew it wasn't the cold, cause my body temperature was raging.

"How are you doing?" she asked me softly.

"I don't… I don't know," I mumbled.

It was the only truth I could tell, because being next to this girl ripped up the rule book of everything I thought I knew about how the world worked, everything I thought I knew about how 'love' worked, and everything I thought I knew about how I worked.

"Here, let me take a look at your eyes," she said, scooting round to face me again, and taking my head in her hands.

I thought I was going to explode when she stared deeply into my eyes, moving her head around and studying how I followed her.

"Hmmm," she said.

"Hmmm?"

"Well, your pupils are dilated, but you seem to be able to focus well enough," she said.

Of course my pupils are dilated, the most gorgeous woman in all creation is touching my face. I lowered my eyes. I didn't know how much more of this I could take.

"You're hot," she said.

My eyes shot back up to meet hers.

"I mean, you feel hot," she said, realising the innuendo, and putting the back of her hand on my forehead as if to prove her professional point.

"Who's prime minister?" she said, embarking on a comedy set of head injury questions.

"A cunting tory arsehole," I replied, making her burst out laughing. God how I loved it when she laughed. I could be in a fucking monsoon and the sun would be bursting out of my heart if she was laughing. She was so close, I could see her beautiful breasts rising and falling with her breath.

"How many fingers?" she asked.

I swear I must have turned bright red in an instant as my shiny new pervert brain gifted me a 3D IMAX surround sound presentation of how many Fitch fingers I wanted and where. I couldn't stop the gasp that escaped from my throat, nor the way I tore my eyes from hers and stared into the sand. The sand that I would have been quite happy to have swallow me up in my entirety, as I heard Emily emit a nervous giggle, and knew that she had clocked what I had been thinking about.

"Am I holding up," she said, trying to hide the laughter in her voice. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

Dear Universe, please let me have a severe concussion, in order that I may sink into an unassailable coma and never have to wake up to face this embarrassment again. But Emily was still close, and waiting for her answer, so I reluctantly looked up at her hand.

"Two," I mumbled reluctantly.

She seemed satisfied with my answer, and smiled at me with genuine affection. I was pleased to have somehow gotten away with the recent fiasco, and not sent her running for the hills with my gutter dwelling mind. And then my brain decided to completely disconnect from whatever it what that controlled my mouth.

"Good number," I said quietly.

Emily's eyes lit up.

"Naomi Campbell," she said in faux shock. "I didn't think you were that kind of girl."

I'm not, I wanted to protest. It's just you and your saucy temptress ways. You make me say and think and feel all kinds of things I have no control over. But I just bit my bottom lip and stared at her nervously. I kept waiting for the bottom to fall out of my world, for her to realise what a useless pervoid fuck I was and abandon me. But she didn't, she just kept looking at me from the depths of that infernal closeness. I was the vampire and she was the sun, and any minute now her power and her purity were going to make this evil body burst into flames.

"You're ok, Blondie, I think you're gonna make it," she grinned. "There's just one more thing I need to try."

"Ok," I said, and sat there passively awaiting the next concussion test.

But it never came. Instead she leaned in and brushed her lips delicately against mine. It was sweet, and uninvasive. It was a question. Am I allowed to do this? Is this what you want? I'm sure she already knew that answer, but I opened my mouth to give my assent.

Were we only supposed to blow the bloody doors off? Cause suddenly the whole building was in fucking flames. My hands were in her hair before I even knew what I was doing. The taste of her seemed to be reverberating round my whole body and doing little dances on my flesh. She opened her mouth to meet mine, and when she moved her lips against me I felt it in my stomach. I felt it in the back of my neck. I felt it in my bones. Like she had always been there, but I had only now discovered her and woken up. I felt her tongue dancing across my lips, and my hands pulled her tighter in as I opened up to welcome her. I'm not sure what I had been doing up until now, because this was fucking kissing, man. This was the most glorious feeling on earth. This was kissing that mattered. They should have important summits on kissing that felt this good, to make sure that there was more kissing of this nature, because if everyone could understand this feeling then the world would be a place of peace and unity and joy. There were little men and women performing rituals of celebration in my head, dancing and chanting 'Emily Fitch's Lips, Emily Fitch's Lips' over and over again. Because Emily Fitch's lips were the single most important thing in the world right now, and they must never be allowed to leave mine. I felt myself trying to chase her, when she eventually pulled away.

"Woah," she said in genuine surprise, and exhaled strongly a couple of times before she took her next breath. "Well, that seemed to go well."

We stared at each other breathlessly, neither one of us seeming to know what to say.

"Do you want to go out?" said Emily eventually. "I mean with me. Do you want to go out with me on a date?"

I could barely restrain myself from answering with 'well duh', but managed to squeeze out a simple yes. There followed a brief interval for more breathless staring before we heard the voices of the other women approaching as they wandered inshore after class.

"Do you want a ride?" said Emily, collapsing into giggles as she realised yet again how we suddenly seemed only to be able to communicate in innuendo. "Home. Do you want a ride home on my scooter?"

"I'd love a ride with you," I said, no longer caring that I sounded her friend Cook.

"Fuck," she smiled, suddenly looking coy, which only made her even more devilishly attractive. "What have you done to my brain?"

"Well I could tell you," I said. "But I'd have to give you a chemistry lesson."

"Is that what this is?" she said, standing up and pulling me to my feet. "Chemistry?"

Observation four – I didn't much care what it was any more, but I knew that I wanted it.


	8. Sophistication And Simplicity

**Cat's been in surgery again today, so I banged this out to give her something nice to wake up to. It's not a major procedure so she'll be fine. She does read all the reviews, so all your kind words mean a lot to her. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter**

**Hypes x**

**.**

**.**

8. Sophistication And Simplicity

Emily

Once I had parked my scooter up, I practically ran across to the harbour and down the jetty to where Effy's boat was berthed. Effy was sat on one of the benches on the back deck, reading a book with a spliff in her hand and a glass of pear cider on the table next to her. She looked up and smiled as she heard me approaching, watching me as I jumped from the jetty to the deck.

"Hi Eff," I said breathlessly, as I plonked myself down beside her. "How are you doing?"

"You want to borrow the boat," she smirked.

"What?" I frowned. "How do you do it? How do you fucking know?"

"You have a special 'I want to borrow the boat' voice," she said. "I can tell within seconds."

"Sometimes you are just way too creepy," I told her.

"You give yourself away," she shrugged.

"I don't have a special boat borrowing voice, do I?" I questioned.

"Do you want to borrow the boat?" she arched an eyebrow at me.

"Well yes," I reluctantly admitted.

"I rest my case," she said, handing me the spliff.

I took a deep drag to give myself a moment's relief.

"So can I?" I asked.

"Can you what?" she replied coolly.

"Fuck you, Stonem," I huffed.

Effy stood up, and wandered down into the cabin, returning moments later with another can of cider.

"When do you need it then?" she grinned.

.

.

.

I was walking back up the cliff path next to Naomi, still slightly stunned by what had just happened. I know I'd said I was going to ask her out, but I wasn't expecting it to happen like that. But I couldn't help it, she was just so lovely, even if she was daft enough to try to swim through the middle of a beginners' surf class. I had this overwhelming urge to protect her, to look after her, and mend her and kiss her better all over. Of course I would have looked after anyone who'd just been whacked in the face by a surfboard, but somehow I just couldn't be professional around her. I just felt this need to be with her, to touch her. I couldn't go back to the class and leave her on the beach looking all lost and forlorn. And of course, her delicious embarrassment when I caught her red-handed thinking dirty thoughts was irresistable. I just had to let her know that I was ok with that. So I kissed her, and fuck me what a surprising kiss it turned out to be.

There was nothing shy or dorky about that kiss. It was as if all she had been waiting for was permission. She deepened it almost immediately, and left my head spinning with thoughts that must have been every bit as filthy as hers. I lost all sense of decorum, and slipped my tongue into her mouth as she tangled her hands into my hair and gave just as good as she got. I'd envisioned an icebreaker, an innocent little kiss to let her know her feelings were mutual, but almost immediately she had stirred up a roaring passion I was barely in control of. I know I'm not exactly a 'let's take it slow and hold hands on the beach forever' kind of a girl. If desire is there then it's fucking there, so why waste time fannying about over it? But still I'd never experienced anything quite like that. I had to break the kiss when I did, cause fuck knows what would have happened if I'd let it go much further. I needed to try and retain some fucking air of cool about me.

It was a tough job. It was all I could do to restrain myself from doing a little victory dance on the sand when she said she would go out with me. I really wanted to hold her hand when we were walking back up that path, but luckily being so short, I needed both arms to carry my board, so I was spared from accidently doing it and revealing the extent of my soppiness. About halfway up the path, Naomi demanded that we stop for a breather.

"We're not all so super fit," she protested. "Some of us have a smoking habit to support."

"It's ok, I was getting tired too,' I lied, putting the board down. "This thing's heavy when you're as little as me."

Naomi took a few moments to regain her breath before turning towards me with a shy smile on her face.

"So, where are you taking me?" she said.

"You might have to give me a couple of days," I replied. "I think I need to come up with something more exciting than a couple of pints of cider down the Lion."

"I wouldn't mind drinking cider with you," she said with complete sincerity, and my heart just grew to twice its size. I began to wonder if she was actually for real, or just a cyborg created as part of some evil scheme to manufacture the most adorable woman ever, in order that we might all lose our senses and do whatever she asked of us. It only made me more determined to do something special for her.

"Well I'll bear that in mind," I said. "But I still think I can be a little more creative for you."

Her smile was like the sun coming up after a long cold winter's night.

"Emily?" she said.

"Yes?"

"Do you think you could kiss me again?"

As if I could refuse. I was a little more cautious this time, trying not to let myself get carried away, but it was still way beyond delightful. There seemed to be no artifice to this girl whatsoever, and I imagined her buried away behind great reams of scientific info, studying the whales and the dolphins, hanging with her best friend and not getting corrupted by the filthy wiles of the rest of the human race. And that's when it struck me – the perfect fucking date. I pulled out of the kiss and smiled as I thought of it. This girl loved the ocean, and I had a best mate with a fabulous boat.

When I brought her back to her place, the Ellis's old cottage that had been turned into a rental, she scuffed her shoes and looked at the floor for several moments as she internally debated asking me in. In the end I made the decision for her, making my excuses before taking her number and heading off. It was all very well fucking _on_ the first date, but it probably wasn't very good form to fuck her _before_ it. Besides, I was keen to go and see Effy and put my plans into action.

.

.

A couple of days later I went to pick her up after work. I called her earlier and told her to wear something comfortable and casual. Thank fuck the weather seemed to be holding, cause I knew there was a big storm coming in the next couple of days. Naomi clung onto me a little bit too tightly as we rode down to the harbour. The other night had been her first experience of riding on a scooter and she was still a little nervous. I could almost feel her heart beating as she pressed herself tightly into my back. My heart was thundering too, but not for reasons of fear. Anticipation, lust and excitement maybe, but not fear. I knew she liked me, liked me quite a lot and I was determined that she was going to like me a whole lot more after tonight.

I pulled up round the back of Rita's café. She always let me stash the bike there when I went to Effy's. When we went back round to the front, Rita was there, clearing off the outside tables.

"Hello Emily," she said. "Are you coming in for your dinner?"

"Not tonight, Rita," I smiled. "I've got a hot date."

I could almost feel the heat radiating from Naomi's face, as she blushed furiously beside me.

"Well, you'll have to bring her here next time," winked Rita. "Give her a good bit of feeding, we will. I know the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, do you think it works for the ladies as well?"

"It works for me," I said. It was a good plan. Rita's food was legendary.

I could feel Naomi stiffen up as I tried to take her hand after she had been exposed.

"Relax, Naomi," I said. "It's a small place. They see me with a hot girl, they're going to be gossiping about it anyway. I am rather exotic in these parts, you know."

"How do you stand it?" she said. "Everybody knowing your business the whole time?"

"You get used to it," I shrugged. "What else can you do? It's all pretty friendly for the most part."

"It's weird," said Naomi.

"Yeah, well where we're going we'll be well away from prying eyes," I said.

"So where are we…Holy Fuck!" said Naomi, as I turned onto the gangplank to Effy's boat and reached out my hand for her to join me. Her eyes were almost out on stalks as she followed me aboard. The Catherine The Great (subtle, Effy) was a considerably classier vessel than The Rosie Malone, and I smiled to myself that Naomi was seriously impressed.

"Is this yours?" she said, almost in awe.

'Oh God no," I admitted. The temptation to pretend only lasted a fraction, but it was definitely there. "I'm only borrowing it for tonight. I mean the business does ok, but a lot of the profits have to be reinvested, so there's no way on earth we could afford something like this. I mean the insurance alone for Fitchwater costs thousands."

"Well I'm not surprised, if you keep bonking random swimmers on the head with surfboards," grinned Naomi.

"Funny," I said, as I started undoing the mooring ropes.

Naomi watched me with alarm.

"What are you doing?" she said.

"Well, we're not going to get very far if we're still attached to the harbour," I quipped.

"Are you allowed to drive it?" she said incredulously.

"Yes, I'm allowed to drive it," I laughed. "I wasn't planning on taking us to a watery doom."

"But it's so posh."

"Naoms, I've been driving this boat for nearly three years."

"So I'm safe in your hands then?"

"I'm not promising that," I said, giving her a wink, before going to fire up the engine.

We'd been sailing for just over an hour, when Naomi asked me if we were going anywhere in particular. She'd been standing on the prow of the boat with her arms out wide and her beautiful blonde locks blowing in the wind. She was already slightly tipsy, having found a bottle of Effy's expensive champagne already set out in an ice bucket with a label saying 'Drink Me'.

"I mean the boat is amazing, and the sea is great, and the champagne's fucking wonderful," she said. "But it's not that much of a date, if I don't actually get to see you."

She stuck out her bottom lip in a gorgeous pout that almost had me stopping the boat then and there, but I had a plan. Fingers crossed it was going to work.

"Not much further now babes, then we can stop and have some dinner," I assured her.

It was a perfect fucking evening, there were a few clouds coming in across the horizon, a for the moment gentle reminder of the storm front that was on it's way, and the swell was large enough to give you that feeling of excitement, but not so big as to disrupt your pleasures. After another ten minutes or so, I slowed the engines. A couple of kilometres away we could see the craggy outcrops of a small rocky island. In an hour or so the sun would be setting, and it looked like it was going to be a cracker. I turned the boat around so that the back deck was facing the sun, and took Naomi back down onto it. As we reached it, I could smell the dinner that had been cooking in the oven on a timer.

"Mmmm," what's for dinner?" said Naomi. "Smells gorgeous.'

"Pies," I said, and she spluttered into her champagne.

"Pies?" she said incredulously.

"It's good seafaring food," I laughed. "Just because we're on a posh boat, doesn't mean I'm posh. I wouldn't want you to get the wrong impression. Anyway, I made them myself so they're filled with love."

"In that case I shall adore them," beamed Naomi. "Champagne and pies. I love it."

I went to the fridge to get some salad to go with the pies, and found more champagne with a note in Effy's handwriting.

"You didn't think I was just going to give you the one bottle did you?"

God, I loved that girl. Poor Katie was going to get a serious earbashing with her virtues tomorrow. I brought the food out to Naomi. She looked so fucking happy with my cocktail of sophistication and simplicity, that I was pretty sure I could count the date as a success even if phase two didn't come to fruition. As we ate I asked her questions about her degree and her work, and she came alive talking about it. It didn't take too long to realise that Naomi was no ordinary student. She was clearly very knowledgeable and ambitious, and I could see her going far. Literally. Travelling the world doing important and groundbreaking studies, and fighting the good fight for the beautiful ocean. Almost without my realising it and definitely without my permission, my brain started conjuring up little visions of going with her. The pair of us in exotic foreign lands, me teaching diving and surfing, her working on her studies, always together and always by the sea. It would be perfect….

What the fuck, Emily? What the fuck are you doing? You haven't even fucked her yet, and you're conjuring up the marine equivalent of the U-Haul truck and sailing off into the fucking sunset with her. She might snore. She might be fucking useless in the sack. She might be a secret Godbotherer. She might be neurotically jealous. There might be a hundred other reasons for this not to be a stupid fucking fairytale. You don't know her, I told myself. You don't know her at all. You are just letting her super-hotness play havoc with your brain cause you really really want to get in her pants. Well that much was true. I did seriously want to get this girl naked even if it didn't lead to a lifetime of nuptial bliss. One thing at a time Emily. Shag first, work out future compatibility later.

"So," said Naomi, once she had finished her meal, and was smoking her after dinner fag. "Now that you've got me all alone out here in the middle of nowhere, what are you planning to do with me?"

She was pitching it as a joke, but her body language betrayed a hint of nerves that it might actually be a possibility. She had done a tour of the boat and would no doubt have spotted the luxury double bed. Once again she was managing to look so unbelievably sweet I could hardly even bear to look at her. My eyes scanned the surface of the ocean behind her, and I started to laugh. The timing was so fucking perfect, I half expected to see Effy out there in a zodiac with a bucket full of fishes for bait. Blissfully unaware of my plan, Naomi relaxed as she took my laughter to mean I understood her joke.

"Are you planning to have your wicked way with me?" she giggled.

"As beautiful as I am sure that would be," I said. "I did actually bring you out here for something else."

I took her hand, and turned her round to face out to sea.

"Oh my God, Oh my Fucking God," she said, as she discovered what I had been hoping for all along. A pod of bottlenose dolphins were breaching not more than fifty metres away from us. Thank you, Universe. Emily Fitch is now firmly ensconced in the Smoothness Hall Of Fame.

"Do you want to ride with them?" I said.

"Fuck, yes. Fuck!" she exclaimed.

I ran up to the bridge and fired up the engines, swinging the boat round to follow the pod as Naomi clung to the front handrail shrieking with delight. We rode with them for fifteen minutes as they clustered round, investigating us to see if we were a fishing boat that might give them spoils, before veering off and outrunning us as they went on their way into the open sea. I slowed and then cut the engines before joining Naomi on the prow. Her eyes were wide with wonder, and her face was flushed with awe.

"Did you really bring me out here to see the dolphins?" she asked breathlessly.

"Well, it's never a certainty, but this area is known for them," I said.

"Thank you," she said, throwing her arms around me and pulling me into a kiss.

"It was beautiful," she said between frantic kisses. "Really fucking beautiful."

"You're beautiful," I said, drunk on the hedonistic excess of her lips on mine.

She drew back and stared into my eyes, her hands still loosely locked around my neck.

"Do you really think so?" she said hesitantly.

I was at a loss to understand her doubt. She was the most gorgeous woman I had ever seen. If I looked as good as her I would be the cockiest fucking bitch in town.

"Yes, I do," I said, with complete sincerity. "I've never met anyone as beautiful as you."

She bit her bottom lip. God, I loved that quirk of hers. All it made me want to do was bite it for her. And there it was again, the gaze that undid me. She looked at me with that pure, magnificent passion, and I wanted to throw my arms asunder and declare myself to be her willing sinner, to do whatever she wanted me to do. She said nothing, merely closed the gap between us slowly and blessed me with another scorching kiss.

Just as every look of lust carries a different message, so does every kiss. And I knew within seconds what this one was saying. This kiss was the kiss. This kiss was a contract. The one that says I will be yours. The kiss that starts with a meeting of lips and ends up with my hands deep inside of her. She pushed her tongue into my mouth and the sensation leapt straight to my cunt, making it throb in anticipation. I needed her. There would be no separation until we'd found satisfaction.

Except for the weird siren sound that suddenly pierced the air behind my head. Damn.

"What's that noise?" said Naomi.

"It's the phone," I said, frustration beating it's way through my blood. "It's the satellite phone. I better go and answer it."

I went into the cabin and snatched at the receiver, fuming with hatred at the innocent inanimate object.

"What?" I said angrily, ignoring the fact that it might have been someone important calling for Effy.

"I'm so sorry," came Effy's voice across the line.

"What's wrong, Eff?" I said.

"I need the boat back."

"What now?"

"Yes now," she said. "I'm really sorry but the meeting's been moved up. They got here earlier than expected and they're not going to hang around because of the storm. I've got to get to sea tonight."

"Fuck," I said harshly. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

"Date going well then?" said Effy.

I could hear her fucking smirking down the line.

"Well it was," I sighed.

"I'm sorry," Effy apologised again. "If I could do it any other way…"

"It's fine, Eff. It's your boat. If you need it, you need it."

"I'll make it up to you."

"Don't worry about it, mate. I already owe you big time for this one."

I left Naomi on the back deck to watch the sunset as I drove the boat back home. It was dark by the time we got back to harbour. When I came down to fetch the mooring ropes, she was nowhere in evidence, so once I had us secured, I went inside to find her. She was fast asleep on the couch. Seems like the champagne, the sea air and the excitement had been too much for her. I called Asif, and gently woke her up whilst he was on his way. Reluctant as I was to do so, it was better to send her home for a good night's sleep. There was no point involving her in Effy's business. Some things were better off remaining a mystery. I called Eff to let her know we were back, waited until she arrived so I could help her cast off, and then smoked a cheeky one skinner as I watched her sail off into the night.


	9. A Wave That Is Coming For Me

**Cat's surgery went well and she's back to terrorising the nurses, so thanks once again for all your well wishes. **

**So I'm sure she won't mind me borrowing this chapter of her story for a couple of special dedications. The first goes out to Ladyhawke1709, Skins FF's favourite Norwegian. There really aren't the words to describe what happened in her country last week, so I'll just say I love you and your beautiful Norway, Hawke, and you'll know which part of this is meant for you…**

**The second goes out to another friend, who is currently fighting for her life in Intensive care at the moment. She is a warm, beautiful and talented person who is still so young, so if you've got any energy to give please send your thoughts to SJ.**

**Thanks. And on with the show…**

9. A Wave That Is Coming For Me

Naomi

Emily had sent me a text the next morning wishing me a good day at sea, and I sent a thank-you in reply. I hadn't really heard from her since then. I mean obviously we had been out on the boat with no signal for the rest of the day, but as soon as we got within range of the shore I started compulsively checking my phone. I was glad to be back, the sea had gotten progressively rougher throughout the day, and I was fearful of the Rosie Malone's capacity to survive a real storm. Once we got back to the cottage, I made some dinner for me and Thomas, trying to provide myself with tasks to distract from the stupidly powerful urge to phone Emily. Once again, I cursed the power she seemed to have over me. I have never been clingy. I'm not normally bothered if someone doesn't get in touch for a few days after a date. I've usually got much more important things to be doing anyway. I've never been that desperate to hear from someone before. But the long hours of waiting around on the boat had me replaying that wonderful date for most of the day. The thought of spending all day tomorrow pretending to analyse our non-existent data, when what I'd really like to be doing is analysing Emily's body in minute detail was driving me nuts.

But I had to at least try to be a little bit cool, didn't I? I didn't want her to think I was any more of a nerd than she already did. I was useless at this game. I usually just waited until the other girl rang me. But then normally, I didn't give that much of a fuck. But then again, I didn't normally get plied with champagne and taken dolphin watching on a first date. I'd looked at the labels on those bottles, and I know I don't know that much about fancy wine, but I knew they weren't the twenty quid stuff you get in Tesco's. So I told myself I would just have to wait until she called me. You do not spend that much time and effort and money on someone if you're not interested in coming back for more. And then there was the hunger. I had felt it coming from Emily every time we'd kissed, even the first time. She seems like such a sweet and lovely girl, and of course she is, but there's a wildness to her and I feel it every time her lips are on mine, like she wants to devour me. It's kind of scary, but not enough to stop me fucking throwing myself at her.

I would have let her take me on that boat. I was a little bit drunk and overwhelmed at what she had done for me. And that was all it took. When I kissed her for that last time, I was fucking ready to give her anything she wanted. Despite the fact that I had known her for less than a week. Christ, was that all it was? It seemed like she had been in my head my whole life. Like she was meant to be there. I was seriously losing the plot. If she hadn't gotten that phone call when she did I would have been fucked. Literally. Not that time and distance and sobriety had made any difference. I was horny as fuck. Not even the mundanity of doing the washing up could cool my ardour. I wanted to have sex with Emily. Let's face it, I wanted to have sex with her the first moment I saw her. And I've been wanting to have sex with her pretty much every moment since.

I managed to distract myself for the rest of the evening, drinking tea and playing backgammon with Thomas. He was excellent company as ever, and rather smartly managed to avoid bringing up the subject of my current obsession. I wasted a few hours in the easy comfort of our friendship, but eventually he went to bed and I was left to face the night alone. I tried to do the right thing, making myself a cup of hot chocolate and having an early night. Normally the sea air makes me sleepy, and is one of the few things that can help turn down the revs on my motorbrain. But not that night. As soon as my head hit the pillow the overthinking sprang into life. Should I sleep with Emily? What if she just wants a fuck? How will I know this? If that is all she wants, will it make it any better to string it out anyway? Would it be worth it to have her even if it was only for one night? Should I be looking at anything more than a fling anyway if I'm going to be out of here in eight weeks time? What if I start something I can't stop, and then can't make it work when I go back to Plymouth?

Needless to say there was copious amounts of stressing, and fretting, and tossing as well as turning, and I had one of the shittest nights sleep ever. It seemed like I'd only been properly asleep for a matter of minutes before I was woken up by a loud banging on the front door. I blinked my eyes, and blearily made the decision to ignore it. I heard Thomas's door open and his footsteps going down the creaky stairs. Thank fuck, I sighed and turned over to the wall, Thomas will sort it. Good Thomas. My eyes closed and I was drifting off again, when a shaft of electrical light from the hallway punctured the comforting darkness of my room.

"What is it Thommo?" I asked, my voice still husky with sleep.

There was no reply and so I struggled to turn over yet again, only to find myself facing the silhouette of a woman in the doorway.

"Emily?" I said as I groped around for the switch of my bedside light.

Again there was no reply, and it wasn't until the light came on that I discovered it was not Emily at all, but her strange friend Effy.

"What the fuck?" I said. "Is Emily alright?"

I could think of no other reason for Effy to be in my bedroom.

"Sweet," Effy smirked back. "She's fine. But you need to come with me."

I looked at the clock by the bed and almost did a comedy doubletake.

"Effy, it's six o'clock in the fucking morning," I said.

"It's the early bird that catches the worm," she said. "Trust me, you're going to want to see this. Wrap up warm."

She went downstairs to wait, and I actually found myself getting up and putting on clothes instead of telling her to fuck off and leave me alone. What is it with these women here having complete control over me? Is there something in the water?

"Where the fuck are you taking me?" I demanded, once I had managed to stagger into the kitchen.

"It's a surprise," replied Effy.

I would have pressed it but something told me that no one got any information out of this woman that she wasn't ready to give them.

"Oh you have got to be fucking joking," I said, when I opened the door and saw the weather. Dark clouds filled the sky, the wind was howling and it was pissing down.

"If you don't come, you'll regret it," she said, opening a large umbrella. "Take the plunge."

It was her echoing of Thomas's advice that pretty much dared me to do it. To follow this stranger out into a storm at this stupidly ungodly hour of the morning. When she drove us to the beach I wasn't surprised, a lot of these people's lives seemed to centre around the bay. The sea was huge, enormous waves pounding down repeatedly onto the sand, but it wasn't until we were half way down the path that I spotted the small group of boys with boards clustered by the edge of the water.

"Oh my God, are they seriously going to go into the water like this?" I said.

"They live for days like this," said Effy. "This is Wales, not Hawaii. Waves like this don't come very often."

"Those boys are fucking mental," I said, shaking my head.

"We're not here for the boys," smirked Effy.

My jaw fell and I stared at Effy open-mouthed as the bomb that she had just dropped exploded in my brain.

"Emily?" I stuttered. It seemed to be my default 'go to' word this morning.

"Told you, you would want to see it," smiled Effy.

"I don't want to see it, I want to stop it," I said. "Those waves are going to smash her to pieces."

"She's small, Naomi," said Effy. "Not fragile. And she has the most profound understanding of the water I have ever seen in anyone. It's fucking beautiful to watch. And if you do want to be with her the last thing you must ever do is try and get between her and the water. It's part of her."

She led me the rest of the way down to the beach, and grabbed my hand as we walked across the sand. Half of me was desperate to get to the water's edge, and half of me was dreading it. The closer we got, the bigger the waves looked.

"Ems here yet?" asked Effy when we reached the guys who were still on the beach.

"Yeah," replied one of them. "She's out back waiting for her girl."

"Her WHAT?" I said involuntarily.

"Relax," said Effy. "Her girl is her wave. The only real girl she's got her eye on is you."

I blushed slightly, and saw the guy we'd been talking to stop checking me out with a disappointed look on his face. It seemed like everybody on this bloody peninsula was going to know about me and Emily before the week was out. But at the same time I couldn't help feeling a warm glow in my stomach at Effy's words. I was the only girl that Emily was interested in, and I had that straight from her best friend.

He rain had started to dwindle, and Effy closed up her umbrella and reached into the bag she'd brought with her, fishing out a pair of binoculars and handing them to me. Next out were a picnic blanket and a flask of tea, swiftly followed by some sandwiches.

"You've done this before," I said.

"I love this," stated Effy simply. "Emily has a magic to her when she rides. It's like watching the sunrise out at sea. It never ever stops being beautiful."

"There's Emily now," said the guy. "Suit with the red flashes on."

I followed the direction of his arm, and saw her, her hair and her suit contrasting with the uniform colour of the wave she was speeding down the front of. I raised the binoculars to my eyes and followed her progress, as she twisted and turned and teased the wave always staying just in front of the white water that threatening to engulf her. Even though I was far away I could tell that she was smiling. Her whole fucking body was smiling. The wave curled right over her and my heart started pounding, terrified it would smash right down on her. But only a few seconds later she emerged from the tube it had created and danced along the surface of the wave once more. It was a classic image, the kind of thing you see in all the movies and stuff, but instead of clear sunny skies and crystal blue water, we were surrounded by angry grey. In some ways it made it all the more wonderful, because it was real. These people weren't playing on the big stage. They were living out their passion in a tiny corner of rainy Wales.

Eventually Emily threw herself backwards into the water, to a few cheers from the lads on the beach.

"She rocks it every time," laughed the guy who'd been stood with us.

Fired up with enthusiasm, he grabbed his board and ran towards the water. I put the binoculars back up to my eyes and scanned the water for any sign of Emily. Finally I caught sight of her paddling back out to sea, diving through those enormous waves as if they were nothing to her. Watching this it was plain to see where she got those magnificent shoulders, and my whole body shuddered when I thought about kissing them. And then I remembered the tattoo.

The next wave Emily caught, she was even more daring, and I forgot to be scared for her, as I marvelled at her skill and her courage. And the end of the ride. I turned round to Effy with the face of a kid at Christmas, visibly unable to contain my excitement. The cool brunette merely smiled back at me with a knowing look on her face.

"Thank you," I said.

"She likes you," shrugged Effy. "I wanted you to see who she was."

"She's beautiful," I whispered, knowing that Effy would somehow understand that I meant more than just appearance.

"I know," she replied.

I must have watched Emily for the best part of an hour, gratefully accepting Effy's tea and sandwiches in between. The clouds began to break up, and streaks of sunshine started to glance the water. Emily crouched down and reached out her arm, her hand touching the surface of the wave she was riding. In all the bluster and fury and the roar of the breakers and the shouts of the boys, it was a beautifully intimate moment, as if she was saying thank you to the ocean for giving her this pleasure. I loved the ocean. I loved it for it's richness and its diversity, and for it's massive importance to the global ecosystem. I was always moved by its beauty, but in truth I mostly understood it in my head. But there were other people who understood it in their bodies, as if they had some kind of primal memory that had never forgotten where we all came from. That somewhere back in the dawn of time, each one of us had risen from the sea. Watching Emily that morning, I knew she was one of those people, and I fell even more deeply because of it.

Finally I got to watch her emerge from the water again, just as I had on the first day, and the fact that she was covered with a wetsuit took nothing away from the experience. Emily was a wave that was coming for me, even more dangerous than the ones that were beating down on the shore around her. If I wasn't careful, she would knock me off my feet and I would drown in her. Even the sight of her walking towards us in a state of almost trance-like ecstasy started a riot of sensation in my poor defenceless body. It wasn't until she was nearly upon us that she shook herself from her sea blindness and noticed me.

"Naomi?" she questioned.

"Effy brought me," I blurted out, suddenly scared she would think I was stalking her.

Emily looked at her friend and broke into a cheeky grin.

"Sweet," she said. Just the way Effy said it. Effy reached into her bag and pulled out more sandwiches that she obviously reserved for Emily, and I struggled not to be jealous of their easy intimacy and the way they knew each other so well. Emily wolfed down the sandwiches, before she made any further attempt at communication.

"I'm sorry about that," she said, wiping the last of the crumbs from her mouth. "I just get really hungry after a session like that."

"I'm not surprised," I said. She must have used up a ton of energy.

"So what did you think?" said Emily, nodding back out in the direction of the sea.

"It was good," I replied.

It was good? Fuck Naomi, you dork. Is that the best you can come up with? But how was I supposed to answer that question for real? That I was now so fucking hopelessly in love with her that I would walk across burning coals just to stroke the neoprene of her wetsuit? That watching her on the wave was one of the most profoundly beautiful things I had ever seen in my life, and she should feel free to make me her sex slave any time she liked? I could never reveal the truth, because the truth would be my undoing.

"I mean it was really good," I stammered. "I mean, um.. beautiful. Like really amazing and stuff."

Emily laughed at my babbling, but her eyes were full of kindness. She stretched out her hand towards me.

"Walk me up?" she said. 'You coming, Eff?"

"I'll catch you in a bit," said Effy, taking the binoculars from my hand.

I felt myself go into my own state of trance-like ecstasy at the feeling of Emily's fingers closing around mine, but seconds later she huffed in frustration.

"Actually, I need both arms to carry this," she shrugged sheepishly, starting to withdraw her hand.

"I'll carry it for you," I said, the thought of losing Emily's touch being more than I could bear.

"You don't have to," she smiled.

"No, it's fine," I assured her. "You've been doing all the work. I've just been sitting around."

I only made it about a third of the way up the path. The arm I had tucked the board under was burning, and I was struggling to control the damn thing in the wind.

"Thank you," said Emily, generously. "I think I can take it from here."

Epic fail Naomi. Can't even carry your girlfriend's surfboard up a hill. I cringed as I realised my mistake. Jumping the gun a bit aren't you, Blonde for Brains?

"Are you ok, Naoms?" she asked me.

"Yeah," I said, frantically digging for excuses for my weird behaviour. "I just not used to getting up this early."

"I know, it's a bitch isn't it?" she laughed. "But when the wave comes, so do we?"

"You do realise that sounded really dirty?" I snorted.

"Somehow everything seems to sounds dirty when I'm around you," she said. "Guess I must have sex on the brain."

She has to know the effect she's having on me, cause she left me floored like that and took off up the path. After a few deep breaths and a few moments of rampant ass perving, I managed to push myself off the wall and follow her. By the time I caught her up, she was nearly at the Fitchwater van, and the sun was fully streaming through a big break in the clouds. There were only a couple of other vehicles in the park obviously belonging to the other surfers, and Cook wasn't even at his post yet. Emily plonked her board down at the back of the van, and reached up behind her neck to undo her wetsuit. Almost immediately she groaned and dropped her arms to her sides again.

"What's up Ems?" I asked her, noticing how she smiled at the familiarity.

"Nothing," she said. "My arms are just _really_ tired. I was kinda pushing it out there today. When you're in the water you feel superhuman. It's not till you get out that it hits you."

"Here, let me," I said, relishing the tiny glimpse of humanity in my heroine.

She turned and put her arms against the van, showing her back to me, and it wasn't until I heard the rip of the Velcro as I opened the flap that revealed the top of the zip that I realised what I was about to let myself in for. There had been a good deal of unzipping in my Emily related fantasies, but they had usually involved some kind of dress. Unzipping her out of her wetsuit? That was just too James Bond to be true. My hands were practically shaking as I reached up and pulled at the toggle of the zip. As I dragged it down the first couple of inches, and the nape of her neck was exposed to me, I knew I couldn't let this moment pass. I leaned and kissed her neck gently, hearing her breathing accelerate as I did so. I dragged the zip a few inches further, and pulled the material apart so I could see a bit more of her spine and the top of her shoulder blades. Again I kissed the flesh I could see, taking my time to savour every tiny nuance of it's topography.

"Oh God," whispered Emily.

The evidence of her desire was enough to temporarily banish shy, dorky Naomi. Something else had taken me over now. I felt Emily's muscles tense in anticipation as I slid the zip to halfway down her back. I turned my attention back to the top of her neck, pushing her wet hair out of my way and lavishing more kisses on her in between nipping gently at the muscles of her neck. I was kind of nervous to leave that part of her, knowing what was now revealed for my gaze further down, and not quite knowing how I would cope when I caught sight of it. Eventually curiosity got the better of me, and I kissed my way down her spine, vertebrae by vertebrae until I reached the first evidence of her ink.

I pulled back slightly so I could focus on the picture. Fish. A shoal of thin striped fishes, reminiscent of cleaner wrasses, each of them about two and a half inches long, curling and flowing around each other between her shoulder blades. It was beautiful, the picture seemed to teem with energy and life. I reached my hand up to touch it, almost in awe. Emily shivered in delight at my touch, and I was struck by a sudden powerful bolt of lust. I yanked the zip down the rest of the way, and pushed the top of her suit down to her biceps, exposing her beautiful, powerful sea goddess shoulders. Emily gasped as I took hold of them, squeezing the muscle and peppering the top of her back with fervent kisses. I released my grip with one hand, and trailed five fingers down from her neck until I was touching her tattoo again.

"You are so fucking sexy," I murmured into her back, as my lips sought out the coloured flesh, wanting to meet each one of those fish individually. Her skin still smelt of the neoprene of her suit, and it instantly became my new favourite scent, knowing it would always remind me of her. Emily's back started undulating as I kissed her, and she became the sea, an ever-restless ocean for her fishes to swim within. I kissed and stroked her, fascinated by the way her muscles moved to make her marine life dance. I followed the shoal down her spine to the centre of her back, where the fish began to thin out and curl around her bones rather than each other. The strength of her mesmerised me. She may be small, but as Effy said, she was most definitely not fragile.

She had a bikini top on under the suit, but it definitely had to go. There needed to be absolutely nothing between me and this paradise of a back. I undid the clasp and pushed the straps from her shoulders, pushing the sleeves of her suit further down her arms as I did so. Her hands were tangled in the neoprene, and she started moaning as I began to kiss her again, snaking my hands inside the suit to reach for her hips and pull her towards me. Once again I pulled back, I couldn't resist the siren call of her tattoo. I started kissing the shoal between her shoulder blades again, my fingers tracing the contours of the muscle and bone beside them.

"Fucking hell," groaned Emily, and she struggled to free her hands from her sleeves, causing yet more exquisite motion in her electrifyingly athletic frame. I was lost in her, dropping down to grace kisses on the fish that swam down towards her ass. Once she was free, and completely topless, I fell to my knees and pulled down her suit till it sat on her hips, discovering the final fish as it swam cheekily down the crack between her buttocks. I followed it with my tongue, and heard Emily's hand slamming against the side of the van.

Much as I was enraptured by my own pleasures, it hadn't escaped my notice that I was driving Emily crazy. My brain that span daily with a thousand questions, stopped thinking at all, and recovered its primitive state, issuing me with simple directives. Fuck Emily. Make Emily happy. Make Emily come. I climbed up her body again, kiss upon kiss, wrapping my arms around her as I went, pulling her close to me and listening to the screaming demands of my own body that it should be semi naked too, so it could feel the delicious ecstasy of her flesh. My fingers snaked across her stomach as I was kissing her shoulders again, knowing that her breasts were bare and just waiting for me to…

Emily span in my arms and gently pushed me away to arms length, staring at me breathlessly her eyes as black as night. My eyes scoped downwards to seek out her tits, how could they not? Oh fuck they were perfect, pushing out from her defined pectoral muscles, her nipples hard with lust. Again my primal brain took over and my right hand was rising of its own accord, before Emily grabbed my wrist to stop me. I frowned in a semi-dazed confusion. No I had to feel her breast. It was what was meant to happen. It was written in the fabric of the universe. It was a fundamental need.

"We have to stop," said Emily reluctantly, as if it was the last thing she wanted to do.

"Why?" I protested. I knew stopping was not on my agenda.

Emily shook her head.

"If you get anywhere near my boobs, I'm just gonna let you fuck me in the back of this van," she said, with a half incredulous smile.

I stared at her like that was the best idea I'd heard in my life, and her eyes flashed at me when she realised I was thinking about doing just that.

"I have to go to work," she apologised.

"What?" I moaned, the injustice of it seemed terrible.

Surely the world could stop so that I could be with Emily?

It was touch and go. We glared at each other in a sexual Mexican stand off, and Emily looked like she was on the point of crumbling, when we were interrupted by the sound of a car pulling into the car park.

"Morning Ladies," came Cook's unmistakable foghorn of a voice, killing the moment.

"Hey Cook," replied Emily, casually waving back at him.

I looked at her in alarm.

"What?" she said, and my eyes flicked down to her torso, to the uncaged beauties that were paying havoc with my libido. Fuck knows what they were doing to Cook.

"Ah," waved Emily dismissively. "He's seen my tits before, haven't you Cook?"

"Yes ma'am," grinned Cook, giving her a salute.

My eyes must have registered my horror, because Emily immediately qualified her statement.

"Not like that," she laughed. "It's just, we're surfers. We're always getting changed out of the back of cars and stuff. After a while you stop being precious about your body. I've seen most of the local lads cocks on more than one occasion."

"And she's still as gay as a window, aren't you luv?" laughed Cook.

"Yes ma'am," grinned Emily, returning his salute.

"I'll go put the kettle on, eh?" he said.

Once we were alone I felt myself consumed by her once more. I couldn't believe how confident she was about her body, but then again, if I had a body like that, maybe I would be too, instead of being painfully shy about exposing myself to anyone.

"Nai, you're going to have to stop looking at me like that," said Emily.

"Like what?"

"Like you're gonna have some kind of heart attack if you don't fuck me in the next five minutes."

My eyes shot to the ground as I felt the blush spreading over my features.

"Hey, don't get me wrong," she said, reaching out to touch my cheek. "I like it, but I got a whole bunch of other women waiting for me, and I can't let them down."

"Surely you're not going to take them out in this?" I said in horror.

"Not here," she replied. "But there's a little bay on the south side that's a lot more sheltered. Should be able to give them a proper thrill for their last day."

"Ok," I said, not knowing what else to say.

"You're going to have to go away," she smiled. "I'm gonna have to take the rest of this suit off, and I don't think either of us are going to survive that. Why don't you go and see Cook for a few minutes?"

"Ok," I said again, and reluctantly turned away and left her to it.

"Ey up, lovebird," said Cook, as I poked my head round the corner of the shed. "Welcome to my palace. Cup of tea?"

I nodded my assent and peered into the tiny room. The back wall was covered with pictures of scantily clad women. Mostly blonde, fake breasted women posing for the camera with patently false desire.

"How d'ya like my hotties?" grinned Cook, before seeming to think about it. "Nah, probably not your type. That's Emily's wall over there."

I followed the direction of his arm to see another cluster of girls. These ones for the most part more suitably attired, and completely different from Cook's glittering array of bimbos. Emily's girls were all kick ass bitches – Eliza Dushku, Michelle Rodriguez, Katee Sackhoff, Pink, Summer Glau, Kate Beckinsale in her Underworld gear, or they were real life sports heroines – Hope Solo, Yelena Isinbayeva, Serena Williams, Amy Williams, Lindsey Vonn, as well a number of other extreme sportswomen with mountain bikes and skateboards and the like. All of them fit, active and badass. And none of them anything like me. How was I supposed to compete with this fantasy? I'd be terrified Emily was going to cop off with every fit surf chick she came across.

"And that's Effy's wall there," laughed Cook. "She's a little more picky than us two."

I looked over to the opposite wall to get a glimpse inside the mind of the mysterious Stonem girl, but instead of a bevy of beauties there hung a single blown up picture of Katie Fitch laughing. I had to admit that without a scowl on her face, she was beautiful.

"Ain't love grand?" said Cook, handing me a cup of tea.

"I'll have to let you know," I told him.

Outside I heard the roar of an engine starting up, and I ran out to see the Fitchwater van driving towards us. Emily stopped at the gate and jumped out to meet me.

"Mission accomplished," she said. "I am now fully clothed and safe to engage."

"I'd call that a mission fail," I whispered.

"Do you want a ride?" she flashed her eyes at me shamelessly. I couldn't take it anymore. I held up my recently acquired cup of tea as a defence shield.

"Nah, I'm gonna hang on for Effy," I said.

"Ok, cool," said Emily, kissing me on the cheek, trying to be all business.

"When am I going to see you again?" I blurted as she turned to leave, and her mask slipped.

She ran back and kissed me breathlessly, our tongues instantly and urgently finding each other. When she pulled away, it looked like it was physically hurting her to do so. She kept our foreheads touching and stared deep into my eyes.

"Tonight," she promised me.

She kept her eyes fixed on me as she backed away towards the van.

"And Naomi," she said with that irresistible husk of hers. "Tonight, yeah?"

Now that was a fucking promise.

**.**

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**So, I know I've been writing this like a demon cause I want to keep Cat entertained, but I've also been on holiday. I'm now off to work at Edinburgh festival for a month so updates might get a little sketchier from here on in. I'll do my best, but unlike Emily, I'm not promising anything.**

**Cheers, Hypes x**


	10. A Perfect Storm

**Well, hello there my lovlies. Sorry we've been away for so long. I have been off working all the hours of the day, and Cat has been off having seizures and getting all unconscious and having more surgery, but just like the fighter that she is, she is back with us and to quote will soon be 'back to rebel hallway walks and nurse patronizing.'**

**We have a new theme tune for her 'The Cat Came Back' – if you don't know it, look it up on YouTube. Of course this meant I had to get on and finish this chapter so I could entertain her.**

**After being told off for not giving a work/school/granny warning for the last chapter I think I better do this…**

**Warning. The following chapter contains scenes of a sexual nature. Cat, don't read it in front of the nurses ;-)**

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10. A Perfect Storm

Emily

Fuck me if I wasn't actually nervous. I had arranged to meet her in the pub on the clifftop, cause I didn't want it to look like all I wanted to do was shag her. Except that was a bare-faced lie. All I could do was think about was shagging her. It was all I'd been thinking about since this morning. I'd been barely there at work. When she had peeled me out of my wet suit with those gorgeous kisses, it took every ounce of my willpower to push her away and go to my class, instead of dragging her off somewhere for wild passionate sex. I was so fucking turned on I could barely stand. I don't think anyone has made me feel quite like this before. The lust is almost overwhelming, but it feels like there's something more.

Katie had caught me sneaking out of the house earlier and laughed her head off.

"What?" I had challenged her.

"You must really like this one," she smirked.

I was rumbled. I couldn't hide it from Katie. I had done my hair and put make up on and I was wearing a dress. Ok, so it was a fairly casual blue cotton dress with an aboriginal pattern on it, but the thing is that I don't usually dress up for anyone. I'm in and out of the sea so much that a fancy hairdo is a waste of time. And I usually just hang out in pretty casual surf gear. People can take me as I am. I'm not that bothered about trying to impress others. But Katie was right, I really fucking liked Naomi and I wanted her to think I was pretty.

"Whatever,' I huffed at Katie, and turned to leave.

"Ems," she called after me.

"What?" I sighed.

"You look nice," she said.

My heart did a little lurch. That was Katie's way of wishing me luck. The Katie Fitch seal of fashion approval was not easy to come by, and I knew that the way I'd accessorised the dress with a zip up hoodie, leather jacket and Converse wouldn't normally be greeted with such enthusiasm. But despite her temper and her attitude, Katie was a good sister and she only wanted the best for me.

"Have fun yeah?" winked Katie.

"Thanks," I said, coming back to give her a quick Fitch hug, before heading out on my date.

Date? Was this a date? I had an agenda for sure, and I stood outside the pub praying to gods I didn't believe in that Naomi still felt the same as she did this morning. Fucking Hell Emily, it's not like you've never had sex before. You know she's attracted to you. Just go in there and seduce her for fuck's sake. After three deep breaths I pushed open the door.

It took only seconds to find her. That gorgeous peroxide hair tends to stand out in a crowd. She was stood looking nervously over Jonno Briggs's shoulder as he attempted to charm her. Her blue eyes sparkled with relief, and a hint of pleading for rescue when she saw me. I stopped breathing when I looked into those eyes. Fuck me, she was beautiful. I was awestruck. I even forgot that I was supposed to be rescuing her from Jonno, and just stared, my powerful limbs that I'd worked so hard to achieve rendered useless by the power of her gaze. In the end my damsel in distress had to rescue herself.

"Hi Emily," she said, waving at me over Jonno's shoulder.

Her voice kicked me into action, and I walked over to her, slipping an arm around her waist, and kissing her on the cheek.

"Hey gorgeous," I said, smirking at Jonno.

"Oh bugger," he sighed. "This one of yours then Emily?"

"Fraid so, Jonno," I grinned.

"Oh bugger," he sighed again, slinking off to comfort himself with a Strongbow. I slid my arm from Naomi's waist, and reached for her hand, intending to lead her over to the bar to get us a drink. But Naomi stayed rooted to the spot, gripping my hand tightly and stopping me in my tracks.

"One of your what?" she said suspiciously.

"He just means one of 'my lot'," I said. "As in gay."

Fucking Jonno. The last thing I wanted was to start this evening off with a fight.

"Just checking you didn't have a secret harem tucked away somewhere," said Naomi cheekily.

"No, no harem," I assured her, as if I could even think about another girl when she was in the room. One glance from those perfect liquid eyes could obliterate the rest of womanhood.

"Good," she said sassily.

I made another attempt to lead her to the bar, but once again she stopped me.

"I don't want there to be anyone else," she said quietly.

All hint of sassiness was gone, and instead there was a quiet vulnerability that ripped my heart right open on the spot, and made it promise never ever to hurt this woman. In that moment the babble of the pub and everyone who knew me there evaporated, leaving only her and the honesty in those sweet blue eyes. I acted on instinct, closing the distance between us and wrapping her in my arms.

"There's no one else," I whispered into her hair. "No one."

I felt her body relax into the embrace, and we just stood there in the middle of the fucking pub. In the list of constant surprises that had been winging their way in my direction ever since I had found Naomi on the beach that day, here was another one. To discover that simply touching someone in this innocent way could feel so fucking good. It felt so natural to be holding her, it felt right. It was impossible to explain the connection, but it felt like she was family. Like I was hugging Katie or my Dad or Effy. It felt like I was supposed to hold her. Like I was meant to.

"Emily, what are we doing here?" her soft voice, interrupted the peace of our embrace.

"Shit, I'm sorry," I mumbled. "Do you want a drink?"

"I don't know," replied Naomi.

She seemed just as dazed and confused by what was happening between us as I was. Suddenly being in a pub surrounded by babbling drunks seemed like a really stupid idea. It was way too fucking normal. I wished we were out on Effy's boat again, just me and her and the ocean. She deserved more than a boozy date and then a tumble, but I had promised her…

"Would you like to go for a walk instead?" I offered.

"I think that would be nice," she smiled.

So I took her back to where it started, to the beach, to my world. I wished I could offer her a beautiful sunset to enhance the mood, but the sky was filled with angry looking clouds. Naomi didn't seem to mind though. She squeezed my hand gently as we walked along the sand. We barely spoke, I think we both knew that the next thing we did would be something that could change our lives, and even though I knew that we both wanted it, both of us were kind of scared. All of a sudden Naomi stopped and looked around as if she was getting her bearings. Then she smiled, and ran a little closer to the water. She turned to look back at me as I followed.

"This is where I was the first time I saw you," she grinned.

"How can you tell that?" I asked her. "It's just a beach, it could have been anywhere round here."

"I have a photographic memory," she replied. "I can remember the exact orientation of the rocks and my relative distance from them. It's even more accurate when my mind is stimulated, and trust me, my mind was stimulated. I am never ever going to forget that moment."

"Me neither," I admitted.

"Really?" she said optimistically.

Could I tell her? Could I tell her that I used to think that love at first sight was a myth, but that now I thought it was an absolute reality?

"Yeah really," I said. "I thought you looked beautiful. I think you look beautiful now."

Naomi kissed me on the cheek and ran away down the beach. It didn't take me long to catch up with her. I wanted to kiss her but she dodged away from me.

"Not yet," she giggled breathlessly, looking around her once more, mapping out where we were. "This way."

She skipped off a little further down the beach. This time I followed her slowly, entranced by the simple joy she embodied in her actions. Once again she turned around, orienting herself against the landscape, a coy smile breaking out across her lips once she was satisfied. She really was as adorable as a fluffy kitten. I could watch her play for hours.

"This is where we were when you first kissed me," she said shyly.

I shut my eyes, reliving the moment my lips first tasted her flesh, first gently and then greedily once I had encountered her hunger.

"I'll never ever forget that moment," I told her. "You surprised me."

"I did?" she questioned. "I thought you were… experienced."

Experienced or not, I had never experienced anything like that kiss. I had expected it to be tentative, awkward even, but it had been the living embodiment of her gaze. It had spoken to me of great and beautiful things. It had reached right into me and offered me a future.

"I want to kiss you again,' I said, holding out my hand.

"I want to let you," said Naomi, lifting up my arm and grazing the tips of my fingers with her lips. I let out an involuntary groan at the touch of her. The gesture was innocent, but it opened the air ducts into the furnace of my lust, causing the flames to roar up and to scorch me. What was it about this geeky blonde scientist that made my brain scramble its information, and made the innocent inspire raw carnality, and the flagrantly sexual seem so unwaveringly pure? Once again I found myself shredded with nerves. I knew I wanted to fuck her, but found myself terrified of what would become of me once I had done the deed. This gentle soul I was pulling towards me scared me more than a raging ocean, but I knew I was powerless to resist her undertow and soon she would engulf me.

I tugged her towards me until our bodies bumped at the hip, and slid my arms around her waist. Naomi's hands slipped easily onto my shoulders, and she pulled our torsos together until I could feel her breasts pressing into the space just above mine. Naomi gasped as my hands slid lower and wrapped around her bum, leaving her lips already parted as I kissed her. This time it was my turn to tell her that this was the start of something, to pour everything I wanted from her into the movement of mouth upon mouth. She let me in, oh God did she let me in. She opened her mouth wider to admit my curious tongue, as one hand locked into my hair, and the other traced its way down my spine. I knew she was tracing the lines of my tattoo, and remembering the morning. My own memory was invaded, and I started to kiss her harder, driven on by the aching in my pussy, and the moisture in my knickers. She started kissing me back just as hard, our bodies pressed tightly together, our hands starting to seek out the gaps in each others clothing. I neither knew nor cared how long we had been kissing. I neither knew nor cared about anything other than kissing her feverishly until the end of time, not that my perception of time was troubling me right now. The world could stop turning and I wouldn't give a damn as long as I could keep my face attached to hers.

"Shit!" said Naomi suddenly, finally breaking the kiss.

The world hadn't stopped turning. And more specifically it hadn't stopped dragging the moon around in its orbit, and the moon was still exerting its influence over the waves.

"Fuck," I said, realising my feet were soaking wet. The tide had come in and we hadn't even noticed it. Naomi shrieked and ran as another wave lumbered towards us. I just let it hit me, and wandered casually out of the water, looking around at how dark the sky had become.

"It's going to rain soon," I said. "We should get off the beach."

There followed a moment's silence as we stared at each other and tried to work out our next move.

"Let's go to mine," said Naomi eventually.

"Ok," I whispered hoarsely, my throat suddenly dry as the Sahara.

She stepped forward to embrace me again, and hugged me as if she belonged there.

"I want to make love to you," she murmured into my hair.

"I want to let you," I replied.

We started tramping our way back up the beach. I knew we could get to her cottage over the dunes. I didn't even mind the sand sticking to my sodden shoes in lumps, because beautiful Naomi was giggling.

"I can't believe we didn't see the tide coming in," she laughed. "Especially you. I thought you were Mrs All Knowledge of the Sea or something."

"Yeah, well normally I am," I replied. "But someone had me kinda distracted."

"Well, you're very distractable," she said. "I can't really be held responsible."

I stopped dead. She was so fucking cute when she said stuff like that. I fully intended to kiss her again, and become all kinds of distracted. But before I could pull her close I felt the first drops of rain begin to hit my face.

"Oh fuck," I said. "We better get a move on."

We had barely made it to the dunes, when the heavens opened, and a proper Welsh monsoon decided to dump itself onto the heads of two horny girls trying to make their way to safety. Within a minute we were soaked from head to toe, sand and wet clothes sticking to our skin. We tried running, but the wet sand of the dunes clawed at our legs and all our efforts did was conspire to make us dirty and tired.

"Jesus," said Naomi. "Is this an apocalypse?"

"No, just Wales," I assured her. "I'm so sorry, Naomi. I should have been more aware. I normally have an instinct about the weather. I don't know why I fucked up so badly."

"It's ok, she said.

"No, it's not ok," I said, feeling suddenly guilty. "I invite you to a pub and don't even buy you a drink. I let the tide surprise us on the beach, and now we're fucking stuck in a storm fit for the end of days. This has been the fucking worst date ever and I just wanted to make things nice for you. I suck, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry."

In some ways I was glad that it was raining, as I felt actual fucking tears escape my eyes at the thought that I had failed her.

"It's ok, it's ok," she said pulling me closer.

"I don't care," she said, drawing me into a passionate kiss.

"This is all that matters," she said, as her kisses started to roam around my body.

I felt my knees start to waver, but Naomi went with it, letting us fall to our knees in the sand, without breaking the delicious rhythm of her kisses. Even in the midst of the downpour, my skin burned where she touched me, as if the skies were raining paraffin and Naomi was a match. My hands grasped at her wet hair as my mouth fought desperately for hers. I needed to feel her tongue inside me, and her hot breath against my lips. She pushed one of her legs between mine and I gasped and clung onto her neck as I felt the friction of her thigh against my impatient clit. One of her hands grabbed the lapel of my jacket to drag me close whilst the other one tugged at the zip of my hoodie until she could reach inside and squeeze my tit. I let out a glorious string of expletives as her fingers found my nipple through the thin cloth of my dress. Naomi was a woman in flames.

"God, I want you so fucking much," she said, pushing me onto my back in the wet sand, and kissing me so hard I thought we were going to end up in Australia.

My lovable dork was gone, and in her place rose the woman from behind that gaze. The woman who wanted me completely. The rain must have been pounding down on her back, but she barely seemed to notice as she kissed the exposed flesh where my pectoral muscles met my breasts. I clung to her back, wanting the weight of her body on top of me, wanting her to reach for me and roughly palm my tits.

"Oh God, you're fucking gorgeous," she cried, forcing her hips hard down against my own, and making me spasm against her. "I need to feel you."

"Take me," I cried, opening my legs to accommodate her. "Just fucking take me."

She grabbed my arms and pinned them over my head, kissing me hard and deep and slamming her thigh against my clit, and making me ache for her so badly. She kept me like that for ages, hands trapped uselessly above my head, her tongue controlling my mouth, and my hips pushing wildly against any part of her I could find. I had never been so desperate to be fucked before, never trusted anyone enough to let go this completely. Never felt this glorious. Never felt this free. The rain was dripping from the sodden strands of her hair onto my face and neck, but I didn't care. There was only this need, this searing need to feel her inside me. Her hands released their grip on my arms, and before I knew it, one of them was snaking its way under my dress, sending it's fire curling around my cold, wet thighs and incinerating me. She clawed my knickers from my body with one hand, throwing them carelessly into the dunes behind her. I pulled her back down on top of me, needing to feel the weight of her again, and to feel her fingers dance across my pussy.

She didn't keep me waiting too long, thrusting two fingers deep into my cunt in the middle of an overwhelming kiss that had me writhing in complete abandon beneath her. The feeling of her entering me was earthshattering. She seemed to fill me up completely, even before she started pulsing in and out of me, releasing a delicious friction that had me grabbing at her like an animal. I lost it for the first few minutes, grabbing fistfuls of useless sand in an attempt to push myself harder against her. The physical intensity was so great, I felt the universe collapse around me until all of its fiery greatness was contained inside my cunt. Huge galaxies swirled in there, old stars exploded and new ones were born in their wake, as Naomi fucked me through the heavens. I held nothing back, I didn't have a choice. She was ripping me apart and recreating me with every thrust.

And then I felt it, felt her eyes upon me, felt the beautiful heat of that gaze. I opened my eyes to see her cool crystal blues burning across every inch of me, and realised that this is what she had wanted all along. To watch me as my body danced helplessly beneath her touch, to see me as her fingers stole my soul. Everything was about Naomi now. We were soaked and we were filthy, our hair was a mess and our make-up was streaming down our faces, but I had never felt more beautiful than I did right then. I had never known a woman to be more beautiful than she was. I grabbed her arse, using it as leverage to work my hips even harder against her hand, needing to feel that beautiful fulfilment pushing deeper and deeper into me.

"Fuck, I want you," she cried. "I want to watch you come."

And then the rush came. Not orgasm, not yet. This was a different rush, the rush of giving myself away. Naomi was a stranger I had only met a few days ago, and yet I was willing to let her fuck me harder and deeper than anyone before. But not just that, this fucking meant something. If anything, I was allowing it to mean far too much too soon, but I didn't care. I clung onto her back as she kissed me and fucked me and told me I was beautiful, whilst the rain hammered down on the frantic motions of our bodies. I cried out again and again as Naomi sped up her forceful thrusts, using the weight of her body to increase the pressure. This was raw and dirty sex the like of which I had never expected from the shy biologist. It was filthy and gorgeous and I couldn't get enough of her. But if this was only lust, then why did it feel so perfect? Why did I feel this overwhelming sense of completeness with her inside me? Why was this hungry shag on a sand dune the closest I had come to the divine?

I felt that special burn begin inside me, and knew that my orgasm was close. My body had its own agenda, working against her even harder in its desperation for release. But in my heart, I wanted to come for her, to show her what she did to me, to give her my body at its most honest moment, free from all pretension and history. In this moment, in this most precious of moments, I wanted to be hers. I kept my eyes open as I hurtled towards the point of climax. Even in the last moments of the light of the day, those blue eyes shone so clearly. She was looking at me again, and it was even better than I had imagined it. That perfect gaze searing into me with the ultimate of desires, and yet at the same time still looking for me, still searching me out. She wrapped me up with her eyes, took me in and held me. My mouth was full of expletives and protestations to God, but here was where our real conversation was playing out in a land without words. I watched her watch me come, and the sheer sense of wonder on her face made me come twice as hard and long. It was a perfect storm of satisfaction, wave upon wave of pleasure for me to ride along the surface of driven by my Naomi. My ocean.

She collapsed on top of me when I was done, and we held each other tightly, squeezing hard. My hands were grappled into the fabric of her jumper, and my cunt was still clenched tightly round her fingers. I didn't want her to leave me. I didn't want to have to break away from her and end this moment, despite the persistent attentions of the rain. Naomi showed no intentions of breaking us either, and just lay there with her face pressed into my neck as my breathing gradually slowed to normal. It wasn't till I realised she was shaking that I found the will to break my trance.

"Are you ok?" I asked her.

"I think I'm so much more than ok," she murmured into my neck but her shaking intensified.

"Naomi, you're shaking," I said, stating the obvious.

"Yeah, but I'm fine," she insisted. "I'm just a little cold."

She lifted her head up and kissed me, gently pulling out of me.

"You were amazing," she said, stroking my cheek.

I could smell myself on her fingers, and it triggered instant flashbacks that made me swoon.

"I had a little help," I half smiled, making her giggle, until she was gripped by another violent bout of shivering.

"I'm ok," she said, when she noticed the alarm in my eyes. "I just have shit circulation. I get cold easily."

"Shit, you should have told me. We could have stopped," I flustered with concern.

"You think so?" she eyed me sceptically.

"No," I admitted truthfully. "You were… fuck, I don't think there's a word for what you were."

I rolled us over and sat up, stripping off my leather jacket and offering it to her, scotching her attempt at refusal by saying I was used to being cold and wet.

"Let's get out of here," I said pulling her up and abandoning my lost knickers to the dunes.

"My cottage is this way," she frowned as I tugged her in the 'wrong' direction.

"Yeah, but my place is closer," I said, wrapping my arm around her.

.

.

I was kissing her in the hallway outside the bathroom when Jenna found us. I had seen Naomi's eyes go wide when she saw the size of my house, until I'd explained to her that it was the family home, and I had to share it with the rest of the Fitches. It was one of the downsides of rural life. Affordable rented housing was hard to come by. Empty properties were snapped up by holiday homers who had more money than we did, and local owners could make a bigger profit renting out to tourists than they could to native youngsters. Most kids had to move out to Swansea if they wanted a place of their own, but I needed to be close to the bay. Most of the time it didn't matter, we had a pretty lovely house, and I could always escape to Effy's any time it got too much for me. But there were times when it held terrible drawbacks, and one of them was staring at me right now.

"Emily, can I have a word?" she said politely, but failing to hide the censure in her voice.

"You go in and get in the shower, babe," I said to Naomi. "I'll be in in a minute."

"K," she smiled sweetly.

"Who is that girl?" said Jenna, once Naomi has disappeared.

"She's my lover, Mum," I said with no malice in my voice. Even Jenna couldn't sour my mood tonight.

"What have you been doing?" frowned Jenna. "You look like you've been beaten up."

I couldn't hide the filthy smirk that ripped across my face as I remembered, and I saw Jenna's face fall as she realised the implications. Poor thing couldn't cope with the idea of one of her babies having rough sex in the dirt, let alone with a dreaded girl.

"We got wet," I shrugged, not bothering to hide the innuendo.

Jenna sighed her 'disappointed that I'm _still_ fucking gay' sigh.

"I hope your not thinking of having her stay over," said Jenna disapprovingly. "You know the rules."

Yeah, I knew the fucking rules. The bitch that was my mother had grudgingly accepted that I was gay, but she still didn't want to see the evidence. Katie could have boys over, James could have girls over, but I was not allowed to bring my filthy lesbian whores into her precious house. So far I had put up with it for the sake of an easy life, but Naomi had put new steel into my veins.

"The rules are about to change, Jenna," I said with a calm forcefulness. "This isn't your house any more. We all work for the family business, we all help to pay for this place. So it's my house too. And if I want to sleep with _my_ girlfriend in _my_ house, then I am damn well going to do so."

"But, but…" attempted Jenna, but this time I wasn't going to let her win.

"This is not a debate, Mum," I told her. "Naomi's special, and I will not have you treating her like a second class citizen. You fuck this up for me and I will tear you down, understood?"

I stared down the woman who had belittled my existence, my hopes, my heart and my love ever since I was a teenager. It was time for it to end. Something must have registered with Jenna that this was our pivotal moment. That I had finally found someone worth fighting for, and I had pit bull in my eyes.

"Ok," she said quietly, and walked away.

For the second time that night I experienced an enormous rush of euphoria. Oh yes, Naomi Campbell, you are special. You are the lightning strike that sparked the dawn of a new era. The old order lay in pieces, its prejudices and condemnations crumbling before my newfound power. The sense of completion I had felt when I was with her had left its mark, for now I was afraid of no one. I finally felt as strong in my mind and my heart as I always had in my body. Her passion had shown me the way to myself. I didn't stop the dirty grin that leaked salaciously across my features as I opened the bathroom door. It was time for payback. It was time to give my lover her reward.

.

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**And finally a bit of pimpage – if you haven't already been caught up in the 'Keep Yourself Warm' revolution, go read it now, it is a truly beautiful piece of writing and has a Naomi who is just to die for. It's by EverythingOnceRight – go be enchanted and amazed. Till next time, Hypes and Cat.**


	11. The Wet Room

**Oh no. On re-reading the last chapter I realised I had made the fatal your/you're error at one point (yes, I do know the difference, it's typo, ok). I think this means I'm supposed to take a shot or something, but the apostrophe police might have been too distracted by the shagging, and I think I got away with it…**

**Now to those readers who were concerned for the welfare of Emily's nether regions in the last chapter, fear not. As you know, Hypes laughs in the face of danger. I have had sex in the dunes, and I can assure you, no sand got into inappropriate places…**

**And a whole bunch of good news from Cat. She has been for physical therapy and got to GO IN THE WATER! She has had two tubes removed and eaten toast and soup! This is all fantastic news so thank you for all the well wishes and good vibes you've been sending. Obviously doing the trick so keep it up…**

**And in other news, SJ's condition had become less critical, so thank you for all your support.**

**As you might expect this chapter carries the work/school/granny/nurses warning…**

**I don't own Skins, but I love fucking writing this shit and making people happy, especially you Cat.**

**.**

**.**

11. The Wet Room

Naomi

So my eyes flickered open and I crept towards consciousness, and my first thought was that I was going to have to reassess my atheism, because surely I had woken up in heaven. For starters I appeared to be in the most comfortable bed I had ever slept in, certainly better than the lumpy piece of crud I had back at the cottage. My nose took in the most delicious aroma that seemed to permeate the whole of the air as I breathed. My body felt more relaxed and simply right in it's own skin than it had done in ages, and my limbs appeared to be wrapped around an object of infinite warmth and softness. For a moment I forgot how I usually faced the world with a brittle, nervous cynicism, and allowed myself to bask in the sensation of feeling good. And then I remembered. Oh God, did I remember… The reason my body felt so good was because it had been worshipped, worshipped throughout a night of unfathomable passion by one Ms. Emily Fitch.

When I walked into the bathroom that night, I was initially confused. Instead of seeing a sink and a toilet as I expected, I found myself in some sort of changing room with a rack of towels and places to hang up your clothes. I frowned, still shivering from the cold, and decided to try the door on the opposite side of the room. It was then that I understood. The room that I entered was a wet room, fully tiled on all the walls and floor with light green tiles. Sink, toilet, bath and bidet sat in one half, whilst the other half, semi partitioned with another tiled wall was a whole shower room with a dazzling array of multiple shower heads. The temperature was obviously maintained for warmth, and I could start to feel my benefits through my soaking clothes. I peeled them off and left them in a corner by the sink. It wasn't like they could get any wetter, and I was desperate to feel hot water pounding down on my goosebumped flesh, and sooth away these spasms. As soon as the rivulets began to trickle down my back I was instantly transported, back to the sand dunes, and Emily. Oh sweet merciful heavens, Emily. Fucking Emily. I don't know what had come over me. Her kisses had made me lose it, and some deep untouched part of myself had taken over. I was still a little shocked as to who that person was down there on the beach, but the one thing I couldn't deny was that it had been fucking incredible. Emily was every bit as much of a force of nature as the sea that she adored. It seemed she could knock me over and surround me just as easily. And I had wanted her so badly, I had barely even noticed the fucking storm. It had just seemed like the perfect background for my tempestuous desire. I had to prop myself up with my hands against the wall of the shower, as my senses overloaded from the recollection of her orgasm, and the way she clung to me afterwards. Is this the thing that they call love? Cause if it is, it's kind of fucking terrifying.

"Wow," a low husky growl of appreciation sounded out behind me.

I span round to see a naked Emily leaning against the partition wall.

"And again, wow," she said, smiling as her eyes burned their way slowly across my whole body. Normally I would have felt awkward and nervous, and tried to cover up my naked vulnerability, but I just let her stare. Stood there under the cascade of steaming water and let her eyefuck me. But instead of feeling humiliated, she made me feel beautiful. It was a strange sensation. I know I'm clever. I don't doubt my intellect or my political conviction, but beautiful? No, other people were beautiful. Emily and her sister, and her friend Effy – they were beautiful, not me. But Emily made me beautiful. She didn't even need to say it, I could feel the way she thought about me, and it staggered me. I felt shivers running down my spine that had nothing to do with the cold, when she pushed herself off the wall and walked towards me.

Now it was my turn to stare. I had never been one to overstress the physical in my affairs, personality was always more important to me even in a fling. But Emily _was_ her body. It was a direct product of who she was, and as such it was an essential part of her. Her delicate balance of powerful muscles and curves, her shapely shoulders, her tattoo that spoke of her passion, and the way she moved. For her there was no shame in nakedness, and I could sense how in touch and in control she was with every part of her wonderful organic machine. She was magnificent, and I felt suddenly inadequate.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled as she joined me under the forceful stream of water.

"What for?" she said softly.

I almost whited out from overload of sensation when she gently traced her fingers over my stomach.

"For before," I said, unwilling to touch her before I'd said my piece.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for," she whispered in my ear.

I felt myself becoming overwhelmed by her, even though she was barely touching me.

"I lost control," I stuttered. "I couldn't help myself. I had to… I just.. you were so…"

"Did you notice me complaining?" she smirked, snaking one finger down from my collarbone between my breasts, and causing my head to spin.

"But, you're not just…" I forced out. "I wanted it to be special."

"Oh believe me," said Emily, walking me backwards until she had me pinned against the wall. "It was special."

She stared at me with midnight eyes, her thigh pushing up between my own.

"Oh Jesus," I hissed.

"Well, I can't quite walk on water, but I suppose I get pretty damn close," she smiled.

Still she just held me there without making a move.

"You're going to fuck me in this shower, aren't you?" I said, my throat suddenly dry despite all the moisture in the room.

"Yes, I am," she said. "But first, I'm going to do this…"

She withdrew to arms length, and reached over to the water controls. She flipped some kind of faucet thing and the walls leapt into life, firing horizontal jets of water across the whole of the wet room. She pulled me towards her and then span me round until she was embracing me from behind. I burst out laughing, as she gently twirled the pair of us to face the different jets. Her hands snaked upwards to cup my breasts, and she gently nipped at my shoulder as we continued our aquatic dance, warm water massaging us from all directions before cascading in rivulets from our entwined bodies. I still couldn't fathom why the sea goddess had picked me out of all the women she could have had, but I wasn't about to labour the point right now. I let my head fall back onto her shoulder, I let her start to kiss my neck, I put myself entirely in her hands, too terrified that she would suddenly come to her senses and kick me out of her house. She released one of my breasts and slid her hand downwards to cup my mound, and I began to space out on desire. Emily was more powerful than any drug I had taken to soothe my furious mind. She had woken my body up so I could feel and understand every sensation around me. Everything was as beautiful as if I'd taken an industrial amount of pills. The colour of light dispersed through steam. The tingling of my skin at the points of contact with the jets. The bolts of fire Emily's kisses were sending through my nervous system. The sliding of wet skin on wet skin.

Somehow I found myself turned round to face her, her lips somehow already on my own, as if I was actually fucking high on this girl. Her tongue flicked across my bottom lip, causing me to gasp and offer her entry. She took ruthless advantage, pushing her tongue inside me and kissing me fiercely. I felt the pressure of her small yet, powerful body against mine, and I gave in to it, letting her push me backwards until my back hit the hard tiled surface of the wall. She didn't break the kiss, just pressed her whole body harder against mine, before letting her hands dance an electric dance over my willing flesh. I may have fucked her in a storm, but the lightning was all in here, crackling around the wet room in an electromagnetic field of dangerous lust. So much water and electricity was a shock waiting to happen, and I felt it when she thrust two fingers into me where I stood. Everything came alive, as if I had been whacked in the chest with a defibrillator charge. My eyes shot open, and my hips jerked forward to meet her. Again she just pinned me there, her black/brown eyes gleaming with satisfaction, as she slid her fingers excruciatingly slowly out of me.

"No wonder they call it a wet room," she purred, as she played tantalisingly with my entrance and my clit.

"I'm all about moisture, me," I somehow quipped.

Emily was still laughing as she started to fuck me, even though her motions immediately started sending spasms down my limbs. I pushed back against her desperately, and could barely remember a world where I wasn't having sex with Emily whilst water splashed and cascaded all around us. She might have tiny hands, but Jesus Christ they were skilful. In my mind I had once imagined a world where Stacey Mathiesson would make love to me, and the world would suddenly be magical. The reality of sex had been somewhat more mundane and disappointing, but Emily had blown both fantasy and reality out of the water. She was moving slowly in and out of me, turning my legs to jelly and my brain to mush as all the blood rushed to my excitable pussy. Her mouth surrounded one of my breasts, teasing the nipple with her teeth and tongue. Her free hand pressed against the other, and I found myself forced against the wall. I put my hands flat against the tiles, and used them to push myself back at her, my muscles straining with the tension. I watched her as she raised her head to transfer her attentions from one breast to the other, slightly quickening the pace of her thrusts as she did so. She looked at my tits with an absolute sense of wonder, as if she had never seen anything so beautiful, before seizing upon them again with a passionate ardour. Again, I forgot myself, forgot that I was some sort of bashful geek, and a lioness of a woman roared into life inside me.

"Harder," I growled, throwing my arms around her neck, and she flashed her eyes filthily at me before complying with my demand.

"Oh God, yes," I cried, as the feel of her pushing into me released a new flood of endorphins into my brain.

I let my hands fall down to her gorgeous ass, and grabbed her, wanting nothing more than for her to fuck me into oblivion. She was pumping into me hard and fast now, and I was loving every minute of it. Emily grabbed my wet hair, and kissed me, and even though I knew it was impossible, it felt like the force of the glorious hot rain that surrounded us was growing ever more powerful. It streamed from our faces as we kissed, and pelted in torrents across our electrified skin. I had to tear my mouth away from hers to cry out, and cried out even louder when she took advantage of the opportunity to bite into the muscles of my neck. Each of her actions was a catalyst for more sensation and my body was going crazy for her, jerking and pushing and pulling against her to grasp at every last iota of pleasure. I was practically feral by the time I found myself of the tip of an orgasm I knew was going to be colossal, and when it took me over I screamed and screamed like something untamed. Emily drove me further into it, and by the time I stopped coming, I was completely hers.

I don't know where I went for the next few seconds, but it certainly wasn't bound by this Earth's gravity. When I came to, Emily was still, and still pressed against me. A good job too, because I doubt I would have been able to carry my own weight without her. She looked me in the eye as she pulled out of me.

"You are unbelievable," she told me. "You're absolutely stunning."

Immediately we were kissing again. Deep, delirious sexy kisses that spoke to all of me. They told me that she loved me, and even though I had barely known her a week, I was more than willing to believe them. I couldn't even begin to entertain the notion that what I had just experienced could be merely physical. Sure enough the physical pleasures had been unprecedented, but I was drowning in emotion, and I had felt it coming off her in waves. I had guzzled on a delicious cocktail of generosity and trust and love. God dammit, it had to be love. There was no other way to explain it.

Without another word she grabbed a bottle of shower gel and washed me, massaging my head as she shampooed my hair, and running her hands over every inch of me. She shut off the water, and dragged me back out to the changing room and wrapped me in big fluffy towels, eyeing me greedily as she did so.

"You look seriously fucking cute in that towel," she said appreciatively. "I am going to have to take you to my bed."

She hung our still wet clothes over her radiator. She dried my hair roughly and loosely with a towel and kissed the back of my neck when she had finished. She dragged me to her comfortable bed and pushed my legs apart so she could lick me. She made me come so hard I forgot who I was. We must have spent half the night making love in a gracious tumble of skin and limbs and compliments. By the time I collapsed into her for the final time, I almost believed I was the fittest and sexiest girl on the planet.

Part of me still did. Especially when her eyes drifted open and she smiled at me. And definitely when she rolled on top of me and told me I was beautiful. And undoubtedly when she kissed me. I could feel the fire rising in my belly again, and I flipped her over, determined to have my wicked way with her when a knock on the door made me freeze in fright. I had almost forgotten we were in the family home with four other Fitches.

"Emily, breakfast's nearly ready," came a voice that I recognised as her mother's from last night.

"Ok mum," Emily replied, and I heard the sound of footsteps walking away.

"Your Mum still makes you breakfast?" I inquired.

"It's a Sunday thing," she shrugged. "We take it in turns to make a big breakfast for everyone. Luckily for you, I think it's Katie's turn this week."

"Why's that lucky?"

"Cause I would never subject someone I care about to my Mum's cooking," laughed Emily. "She's atrocious."

I laughed along, but my brain had fixated on 'someone I care about'.

"But I don't want to foist the full onslaught of the Fitches on you if you're not ready for it. We can skip it if you like," she said kindly.

"Actually, I'm quite hungry," I said. "I think I burned a lot of energy last night."

"Oh thank God," sighed Emily. "I'm fucking starving. I always get hungry after sex. And Katie's fry-ups are legendary."

Emily leapt from the bed with surprising energy, ferreting around in her cupboards. In the end she had to borrow a pair of her brother James's jeans for me as nothing of hers would fit me. I sat on the bed in the middle of this flurry of life, feeling like I was drunk, and not quite believing what was happening to me. Not only did I appear to be completely in love with this girl after one night together, but I was about to meet the family. Emily squeezed my hand as she led me towards the kitchen, giving me the cutest little reassuring smile. When she pushed the kitchen door open there was a decided lack of frying smells. Instead there was a blond boy of seventeen or so, setting out a generously spread continental breakfast.

"Thought it was Katie's turn?" frowned Emily.

"Katie's a dirty stop out bitch," grinned James, turning to face us. "Woah, Ems. Is this your bitch? She's totally uberfit."

"James, this is Naomi," said Emily, shaking her head. "Naomi, this is the perverted little twat known as my brother."

"Well if you ever get bored of her Emily, let me know," said James. "Cause I would totally tap that."

In the microseconds it was taking me to come up with a sarcastic comeback, James crumpled under a vicious slap to the back of the head, administered by a dishevelled looking Katie who had just entered the room, obviously still dressed in last night's party clothes.

"Don't perv on the guests, worm," spat Katie.

"Owww, bitch," whined James. "What's up with you anyway? You look like you've been shagged through a hedge backwards."

Katie cast her eyes nervously towards Emily, who was looking back at her with a questioning glare.

"It's not what you think, bitches," said Katie. "I just stayed at a friend's, yeah?"

"Aye aye, Katie love, good night out?" a booming male voice with a Liverpudlian accent rang out behind me. Fitches were descending upon me from all sides. I turned to face a muscular older man with a Hollywood smile.

"And who is this lovely lady?" he beamed in my direction.

"This is Naomi, Dad," replied Emily.

His eyes flicked down to our still joined hands.

"Nice work, Emsy," he grinned. "Very nice indeed. Don't leave the lady standing around now, love. Offer her a seat, don't let it be said that the Fitches neglect their guests."

We all sat down, but no one started eating. It seemed like we were waiting for someone. Eventually Emily's mother joined us, but unlike the rest of the Fitches, who seemed genuinely welcoming, she barely said a word or even looked at me, as if she was trying to pretend that I wasn't there. The rest of them more than made up for her though, and breakfast was brash and chaotic and noisy. It reminded me of mornings back at my mum's house, back in her communal living phase where breakfast consisted of a dozen strangers trying to talk over each other, except that these people were all from the same family. They bitched and bantered and insulted each other, but you could tell there was a tremendous amount of love in the room, and that family was something that was incredibly important to all of them, even the seethingly silent Jenna.

"I don't think your mum likes me," I said, once we had escaped to the privacy of Emily's room.

"It's nothing personal," said Emily, coming over to hug me. "She still can't cope with the fact that I'm gay."

"Seriously?" I said.

My mum had reacted to my own timid revelation with nothing less than a squeal of delight.

"She's still living in the dark ages," shrugged Emily. "You're the first girl I've ever had stay over so I think she's a little bit freaked out."

"Really?" I asked her.

Emily seemed so confident in her sexuality, I found that hard to believe.

"I guess I figured you were worth fighting for," she smiled.

A felt a stupid grin take up residence on my face.

"You are the cutest fucking thing ever," said Emily, sporting her own stupidly happy grin.

She grabbed me by my T-shirt and pulled me into a kiss. A kiss that became increasingly heated until she pushed me onto my back on the bed, and started reaching for the button of my jeans. I felt desire exploding within me again, as she tugged the trousers from my legs.

"Fuck, Emily," I gasped as she pushed up the fabric of my T-shirt and started showering my belly with kisses.

"That's my plan," she smirked, before returning to her lavish attentions to my flesh.

"Shit. No. I have to go," I groaned.

The disappointed pout that flooded her features made me want to abandon the day and give in to her there and then, but I had responsibilities to my work and to my best friend.

"We're supposed to be going to sea today," I told her.

"It's my day off," she sighed. "I was hoping we could spend the day together."

"I'd love to," I assured her. "But I can't let Thomas down."

"No you're right," she said. "What you're doing is important. I'll drive you home."

I felt another surge of love overwhelm me. Emily understood. She got me. The things that mattered to me mattered to her too. The sea lived in both our hearts, and our bond was all the stronger for it. But the thought of leaving her behind was ripping me apart. My very next thought was out of my mouth before I even had time to process it.

"Come with us," I said.


	12. A Deep Connection

**So I've been a right grumpy hormonal fucker today, and so for the benefit of humanity I decided to forgo the delights of the world's largest arts festival, and lock myself away in my van instead – and this is the result.**

**So Cat has been in hospital for nearly a year now, but for the first time they are now actually starting to talk about her getting out of there, so I would like you all to join me in rejoicing and sharing our energy to make it happen.**

**The highlight of my week was when Cat told me this…**

"**I was reading the next chapter, and a nurse walked in and I slammed my laptop shut and all she said was "you look guilty"**

**There is a slight moment of heatedness in this, but I think you're all probably safe without the warning…**

12. A Deep Connection

Emily

I drove Naomi back to her cottage but I'm not sure I should have been allowed to drive my scooter that morning. I was still delirious from the events of the night before, and I was struggling to concentrate on driving, especially with her arms wrapped round my waist and her breasts pressing into my back as we rode. By the time we arrived there I had worked myself up into such a frenzy that as soon as our helmets were off I had thrown myself onto her lips again.

"Wow," said Naomi, when I released her from my grasp. "You really are the most fantastic kisser."

"I try," I blushed at my own enthusiasm.

Naomi pulled me back towards her, and held me tight.

"You're lucky I've got plans," she murmured into my hair. "Otherwise I might just have to chain you to my bed."

I knew she meant it light-heartedly, but my mind suddenly flooded with the most inappropriate of images.

"We better go in," I said, my voice suddenly croaky. "We don't want to keep Thomas waiting."

Naomi kissed my forehead and slid away from me, leading the way inside. She frowned on discovering an empty kitchen, looking at her watch to confirm the time.

"Thomas," she yelled up the stairs, before shrugging back at me. "Not like him to still be in bed at this time. He's usually been and gone for a run by now."

The sound of heavy footsteps started thudding down the stairs, quickly followed by the appearance of Thomas, looking like he had just thrown some clothes on the second before.

"Naomi," he blinked a few times before breaking out in his trademark smile. "And Emily, how lovely to see you."

A second set of footsteps sounded on the stairs, and Naomi flashed her eyes cheekily at Thomas, and punched him on the arm, before turning her eyes expectantly to the door. She was rewarded moments later when a pretty blonde storm of energy burst into the room.

"Blooming 'eck, Thommo, I hope you've got some food in cause I am whacker hungry after all that making monkey."

"I ran into Pandora at the pub last night," grinned Thomas sheepishly.

"Oh really?" smirked Naomi, delighting in winding him up. "And what happened then?"

"Oh he charmed my pants off. Literally, as it happens," giggled Pandora. "Came back here and we've been surfing and turfing like crazy people all night. He's a blinking dream, and I swear he musta given me about twenty orgasms, cause right now my legs are like big wobbly jellies."

Naomi's eyes went wide at Pandora's particularly joyful brand of oversharing.

"Well, you did ask," I grinned, having grown used to her idiosyncrasies through the week.

"What about you two?" asked Pandora. "Get up to anything fun last night?"

I threw a sideways glance at Naomi, and the violent blush that exploded across her face. Once again her adorable transparency had my heart doing dances under flashing lights and twirly glitterballs like a full on disco queen. I felt both Thomas and Pandora's inquiring glances switch between Naomi and me. There was no point trying to beat about the bush, especially as I was fully intent on making Naomi my girlfriend. I gave a cocky little shrug.

"Some monkey may have been made," I admitted.

We packed some supplies for lunch, and Thomas drove the four of us down to the harbour in his car. Once Pandora had found out we were going on a boat there was no containing her excitement until Naomi had agreed to let her come too. After all, she could hardly begrudge her after having invited her own lover along for the ride.

"This is going to be whizzer!" exclaimed Pandora, as she skipped along the jetty. "Look, there's even some blue sky over there."

"She's excitable," said Naomi dryly.

"She is wonderful," beamed Thomas. "And you did tell me I should go for a nice girl."

"They don't come much nicer than Panda," I said.

"And I see you have taken my advice too Naomi," said Thomas.

"What advice?" I asked him curiously.

"Take the plunge," he grinned.

All brain function seemed to desert me at his words. I remembered just how magnificently Naomi had taken the plunge with me last night. The thought of how she had taken me on the sand dunes made me trip up over my own feet, and clutch at the jetty railings for support, as my entire being decided to decamp to my pussy once more.

"Smooth, Ems. Smooth."

I looked up to find Naomi grinning at me, obviously delighted that I had taken over her crown in the adorable klutz stakes. At least I hoped she found it adorable. I got my answer when she held out her hand to pull me back to my feet, not stopping until I found myself being kissed. I'm sure we were supposed to stop at some point and get on with the business of the day, but she just tasted so fucking gorgeous I couldn't tear myself away. Naomi seemed of a similar opinion as her lips kept seeking out mine and her hands roamed over my back. She was an intricate and beautiful maze that I never wanted to find my way out of. I could wander these perfect corridors forever, lost in softness and lust. I had almost forgotten where we were until the sound of Thomas calling out Bob's name repeatedly, caused Naomi to pull away from me.

"Where is that crazy old bastard now," she muttered, turning towards the Rosie Malone.

It took me several seconds to recover myself, but then I quickly jumped down onto the boat.

"Probably just sleeping it off," I said, turning to hammer on the cabin door. "Come on, Bob you lazy sod. You have customers."

"Looking for Bob, is it?" came a gruff male voice from the adjacent boat."

It was Huw, one of the fishermen.

"Yeah," I said.

"Well, you'll not find him there," said Huw.

"Where will we find him?" frowned Naomi. "He's supposed to be taking us out today."

"These the students is it, Emily?" said Huw, ignoring her.

"Yeah," I said placatingly. "Where's Bob?"

"In the hospital down Swansea," he replied. "Got himself pissed and totalled that new car of his. Broke an arm and a leg, he did. He'll not be taking your students anywhere for a while."

"What the fuck are we supposed to do?" exclaimed Naomi. "We can't afford another boat. We need to go and see him and get our money back."

"Oh, you won't be seeing that again," shrugged Huw. "He spent that wodge of cash you gave him on that new car he's just crushed."

"This is indeed a problem," frowned Thomas. "We can't exactly wait for the insurance money."

"Insurance?" laughed Huw. "You'll be lucky. Bob, doesn't believe in insurance. Says they're all a bunch of thieving bastards, so he does."

"Fuck," yelled Naomi, slamming her fist into the side of Bob's boat. "Fuck, Fuck, FUCK!"

I leapt back onto the jetty and wrapped my arms around her, before she could do herself any more damage.

"It's ok," I told her. "It'll be ok."

"No, it's not ok," she screamed. "Tell me how the fuck this is going to be ok."

"My she's a feisty one," winked Huw. "I bet she's a tiger in the sack, eh Emily?"

From the look in her eyes I thought she was about to rip his balls off. Luckily Thomas seemed to understand his friend's temper and swiftly placed his body in between Naomi and Huw's boat.

"We cannot solve anything by fighting, Naomi," he soothed. "Come on back to shore. I'm sure we will be able to find a way."

Between us we managed to half drag Naomi back to the harbour wall, with a somewhat dazed Pandora following on behind.

"What the fuck are we going to do, Thommo?" she said, once her second cigarette in a row had managed to calm her enough to speak. "The project's fucked. We need another boat, but that cunt Bob has crashed our only money into a ditch."

It was only then that I truly understood just how passionate she was about what they were doing, and the distress in her eyes made me want to sell my own sister if it could afford a solution. Out of that thought a sudden bolt of inspiration hit me, even if it meant I would probably have to spend the rest of my days trying to convince Katie of the joys of lesbian sex.

"Effy has a boat," I said.

"Effy?" said Naomi incredulously. "Wasted Effy has a boat? Do they let people that munted have boats?"

"That's Captain Effy to you," I said defensively. "She's actually an excellent sailor. Besides, you can hardly talk. You went on the high seas with Bob. Don't try and tell me he was sober."

"Do you really think she could help us out?" said Thomas. "We have no money to offer her."

"Effy doesn't need money," I replied. "And she's my best friend, an environmentalist, and a good person. I'm sure she'd want to help you. Just let me talk to her first. If Katie did cop off with someone last night, she might not be in a very good state. Why don't you go get tea at Rita's and I'll see what I can do?"

I set off down the jetty towards the Catherine The Great with a sense of trepidation. I know Katie had claimed to have been staying at a friend's, but I knew my sister, and I knew something had been going on with her. I just hoped to fuck Effy hadn't witnessed it and gone on another bender. I climbed over the gangway, calling out her name as I entered the cabin. There was no sign of her.

"Effy?" I called cautiously as I opened the door to her bedroom.

Effy was not comatose or falling down munted as I had expected. She was in bed, but seemed wide-awake, and she whipped her hand out from under the covers.

"Emily," she said somewhat breathlessly, and all the signals clicked alarmingly into place in my brain.

"Oh shit, were you…? Oh fuck, shit. I'm sorry…" I stuttered.

Effy seemed entirely unfazed by my intrusion.

"I may be saving myself for Katie," she smirked. "But I still have needs."

"I'll come back later," I muttered in embarrassment.

"No it's fine," smiled Effy. "You've kind of ruined the moment anyway. It's hard to masturbate over someone when their baby sister's in the room."

I rolled my eyes at her.

"I know we're close, babes, but there are some things I do not need to know," I shuddered.

"Who else would it be?" shrugged Effy.

I jumped onto the bed beside her, and she immediately pulled me into a massive unsolicited hug.

"You're in a good mood," I said in surprise, pleased that I wouldn't have to try too hard to convince her to help Naomi and Thomas.

"I am," she beamed back at me.

"How come?" I asked, pushing thoughts of Katie to the back of my mind.

"Katie stayed here last night," grinned Effy.

"WHAT?" I stuttered.

"Not like that," said Effy calmly. "Just as friends. I was in the car park of the pub last night doing some deals, when Katie came rushing out. She was upset, because that Thomas boy was getting off with Pandora from your surf course. I think she had her eye on him for her next non-Freddie distraction shag. Anyway, she let me comfort her, and we ended up coming back here to get wasted. It was lovely, Ems. I mean we ended up having a whole bunch of coke, but it meant we talked to each other for hours, and it was fucking amazing. She's just amazing, you know?"

I shook my head. I know Katie. I've lived with her all my life, and I know she isn't the angel she is in Effy's eyes, but there was no disputing the sheer joy on my best friend's face.

"She stayed here, Emily," smiled Effy. "Here in my bed. I slept next to her all night long. It was beautiful. It means she's starting to trust me."

I wanted to support Effy in her happiness, but I remembered how rattled Katie had seemed when she got home.

"Tell me you didn't try anything, Eff," I sighed.

"I didn't," insisted Effy. "At least I didn't mean to…"

"Were you dreaming again?"

Effy nodded sheepishly.

"I didn't mean to. I really was just happy that she was here and she wasn't freaking out. But I think I might have cocked it up this morning."

"You felt her up didn't you?" I sighed.

I had been the victim of Effy's wandering dream hands on more than one occasion. Who knew how much further she could have gone with the real Katie sleeping here beside her?

"The first thing I knew about it was waking up to her yelling at me, and pulling her clothes on as if she was in an Olympic speed dressing event, before she flew out of the door. So yeah, I guess I must have felt her up. Will you apologise to her for me? Will you explain?"

"Of course I will, I'm your best friend, and best friends look after each other, right?"

Effy cocked a quizzical eyebrow at me.

"You want to borrow the boat," she said knowingly.

"It's a bit more than that," I said, not even bothering to try and deny it. "Bob the Rental crashed his car pissed last night and he's ended up in Swansea hospital with a broken arm and leg."

It took Effy less than a second to figure out what I was after.

"So Naomi's fucked," she said.

The proximity of the words 'Naomi' and 'fucked' caused implosions on a cosmological scale in my faculties of reason, and the corresponding physical reactions ran riot through my tiny frame. Breathing became suddenly difficult, my body temperature shot up in an instant and I could almost feel my pupils growing in size. All of my muscles tensed, and a massive thump of desire punched its way into my pussy. The indicators would have been obvious to a hyperactive four year old, let alone the stupidly perceptive Effy, who could read body language like it was made from giant flashing neon signs.

"In more ways than one," she smirked.

I threw my hands in the air and allowed the smug grin I'd been hiding to explode over my face. If I couldn't do a little gloating with my best mate then who could I do it with?

"It went well, I take it?" said Effy.

"You have no idea," I replied huskily, whilst random flashbacks played themselves out vividly in my brain.

"One day I hope to," she said.

I hope so to Eff. I hope so too.

"So Naomi and Thomas need a boat," said Effy.

"They were supposed to go to sea today," I informed her.

"And every other day for the next eight weeks," said Effy, reminding me of the enormity of the favour I was trying to pull from her.

"I know it's a lot to ask, but.."

"I'll do it," interjected Effy. "With the proviso that if something comes up business wise, that has to take precedence."

"Of course," I agreed readily on Naomi's behalf. I would have to somehow try to explain it to her later without revealing too much. "How did the rendezvous go the other night?"

"Sweet as," said Effy, clambering out of bed to put some clothes on. "All done and dusted."

"And the other stuff we needed?" I asked her cautiously, as if we were being bugged.

"Sorted," said Effy looking me in the eye.

"So it's on then?" I said with a mixture of apprehension and determination.

"It's on whenever you're ready for it, Em," said Effy, her steely blue gaze laced with a dare. I looked back at my beautiful brave friend, and the conviction won out over the fear.

"Sweet," I grinned back at her.

The news of Effy's agreement was greeted with great joy back on the quayside. Pandora did a little victory dance, Thomas's smile threatened to split his face right open, and Naomi flung herself into my arms and plastered my face with kisses. Naomi and Thomas went off to get their equipment from Bob's boat once Effy had told them where he kept the spare key, and then she had given a wide eyed Panda a tour of her boat, nearly giving the poor girl heart failure when she promised her she could drive it once we reached the open sea. It took us almost an hour and a half to reach the dedicated study point for the day, still probably less than half the time it would have taken in Bob's old heap of junk. There was an initial bit of setting up to do, but once that was done, it was as Naomi had explained to me, mostly about the waiting. Thomas and Pandora cuddled up in front of the undersea video feed as if it was a David Attenborough programme, Effy got started on some serious marijuana smoking, and Naomi and I found ourselves on the back deck with little other to do than snog. It was an activity I threw myself into with great gusto, and the pair of us went at it like teenagers in the bus stop. There had been no awkward silences, no nervous discussions of where we were going next. There seemed to be no doubt in either of our minds that we were headed for a relationship, we could scarcely let go of each other long enough for the discussion.

Despite the fact that we had barely spoken before we'd fucked, I felt an innate closeness to her. A sumptuous intimacy that I had struggled towards, but rarely achieved with any of my previous lovers. I couldn't think of anything I would rather be doing than kissing her out here on the waves, their ceaseless motions only adding to the sensuality of our delicious meeting of mouth on mouth. We had managed to control ourselves for what seemed like hours, but eventually, inevitably maybe, Naomi's hands grew restless, and I could feel her fingers searching for the edge of my top. As soon as she managed to discover a little flesh she let out the most delightful little moan, and before I even knew what I was doing I found myself sliding on top of her until I was straddling her where she sat on the white upholstered bench. I took her face in my hands and kissed her again with open lips, offering myself to her for a deeper kiss. Naomi took the bait and her tongue came searching into my mouth, releasing a now familiar tingling sensation into my cunt. I don't know how she made me want her so much so quickly, but I was dying to feel her filling me up again. I found myself grinding up against her as our tongues clashed more violently, and I felt her hands slide down over my bum to feel the way my hips moved. My hands spread over her tits, and I massaged them through the thin fabric of her borrowed T-shirt, imagining how much better they would feel if she were naked.

"God you make me want you so much," I growled into her ear. "I want to feel you fuck me where we are, like this. I want to ride you."

I watched her eyes grow wide at my dirty talk, but she slid one of her hands round to the front and grabbed me by the crotch.

"I want that too," she hissed breathily. "I want to watch you come on top of me."

"You know I've got a perfectly serviceable bed downstairs if you need it," came an amused voice from above us.

I looked round guiltily to see Effy leaning on her elbows peering down on us from where she was lying on the roof of the boat.

"Unless you were planning on giving me a show, cause I'm cool with either option," she said calmly.

I looked back towards Naomi to find her transformed from sexual tiger to horrifically embarrassed shy scientist in an instant. I raised my eyebrows at her. I was so fucking horny I wasn't about to turn down Effy's offer of a bed because of shyness. I flicked my eyes towards the door of the cabin, and watched Naomi bite her bottom lip nervously.

"I'm supposed to be working," she whispered.

"Fuck first, work later," I suggested.

It was enough. She kissed me passionately and slid forward, forcing my feet back to the ground and propelling the pair of us to standing. She kept kissing me, as she continued to push me backwards until I had to stop her for fear of falling down the cabin steps.

"So bed, yeah?" I said breathlessly.

"Bed," affirmed Naomi.

I had just turned round to lead us down the steps when I was distracted by the sound of shrieking coming from the prow of the boat. Naomi and I looked at each other, before abandoning our mission and clambering to the front of the boat. When we got there Panda was jumping up and down, practically screaming. I wasn't quite sure whether it was with pleasure or terror, until I saw Thomas smiling and messing with the video controls.

"Naomi, you have to see this," he said excitedly, setting the video onto playback.

"We saw a sea monster!" screamed Panda. They didn't even have a scale of measurement for how excited she was.

"Fuck me," I said, when the image of Panda's 'sea monster' floated across the screen. It was a massive fucking turtle, over two metres long floating gracefully though our very own bit of ocean.

"Dermochelys coriacea," said Naomi almost respectfully. "The giant leatherback sea turtle. I knew their numbers have been increasing in these waters, but I never thought I see one on our own camera feed. This is awesome."

"And relevant to the study," enthused Thomas. "It is the pollution affecting the jellyfish stocks that are bringing them here."

"Well some say climate change is the major mitigating factor," countered Naomi. "That and the overfishing of the herring stock."

I left them arguing about the why's and wherefore's, and acted purely on instinct. I could see Effy had had the same thought as me when I saw her shrugging herself out of her jeans and preparing to dive from the top of the boat. I left my clothes in a pile behind me and took several deep breaths. A final glance across at Effy and within seconds the pair of us were in the water, pulling down and down towards the darkness. Effy kept up as well as she could but soon I easily outpaced her, pushing myself onwards until I knew I was reaching my limit. I could feel it in my lungs, and I stopped my descent, flipping myself right way up again and allowing myself to travel slowly back towards the surface. And that's when I saw them. Four majestic turtles swimming no more than twenty metres away from me. I desperately wished I'd had the time to put on my scuba kit, so I could stay and watch them for longer, but if I had done that they would have been gone. So I had to make the most of the precious seconds I had with them and commit the experience to memory as I continued my infuriating ascent. Moments like these are priceless, when we can experience communion with beasts who know nothing and care nothing for us. The ocean is a different world, and much as though we try to lord it over the planet, we can only ever be guests in its embrace. It's a thrilling and yet humbling experience, that I am thankful for every time I have the chance to grab at it. It fuels me, and makes me understand why I am who I am. I prolonged it for as long as I could, but I knew my lungs would start burning soon, and I cursed my need for air. I stared as hard as I could as the magnificent creatures that completely dwarfed me swam on into the distance. It was time to kick off, and back to the surface.

I breached, taking in great gulps of air and buzzed as fuck from what I had just experienced. It took me several seconds to realize that Effy was shouting at a terrified looking Naomi.

"She'll be fine," yelled Effy, treading water, her eyes holding the same glint of pure wonder as my own. "She knows what she's doing."

"But she's been under there for ages," said a panicked Naomi.

"I'm here," I called, waving my arms in her direction.

"Oh thank fuck," she cried. "You scared me."

I swam over to Effy, once I had reassured Naomi as to my safety, and we shared a knowing glance. Effy and I were partners in crime, both daredevils, both willing to take risks if the payoff was worth it, and it was that connection that flared between us as we let the swell carry us.

"Did you see them?" I asked her.

"Yes, I fucking saw them," she beamed.

We fucked around in the water, swimming and diving around each other in the aquatic equivalent of a dance of joy, reluctant to go back to the boat and relinquish our connection to our special moment, to our rapture. It was the cold that drove us back in the end. We were in the open sea in our underwear and our bodies simply couldn't maintain temperature. Panda and Thomas were still clustered around the video feed, excitedly looking out for more turtles, but Naomi was watching us as we swam back towards her and I knew she'd been watching us for some time. I kicked off and swam fast to the back of the boat, leaving Effy behind, wanting to reassure my nervous lover.

"See," I declared as I climbed back onto the low deck platform. "All safe and sound."

"That was crazy," said Naomi, wanting to hug me, but not wanting to get wet. "You fucking freaked me out."

"I'm sorry," I told her. "Me and Effy free dive all the time. I guess when you know me better, it won't frighten you so much. And I want you to get to know me better, Naomi. I want you to get to know me a whole lot better."

"Wowzer, you and Eff are like mermaids," said Pandora, scampering towards us with towels as Effy climbed out of the water.

"Yeah, we swim like a Fitch," smirked Effy.

I caught Naomi eyeing her suspiciously.

"Come on you," I said, grabbing Naomi's hand. "First food, then the next round of samples, then back to what we were headed for before we were cockblocked by a turtle."

"Bed?" said Naomi, a hopeful glint returning to her eye.

"Yeah, bed," I assured her. "And your hands inside my body."

She seemed happy with that.


	13. A Question Of Trust

**Watch out world. Not only has Cat been eating, but she is also gaining weight. Which is one of the main things she needs to do before they will let her out of hospital. All of which means, that the mighty force of nature that is young Cat is getting ever closer to being unleashed upon the world. She is a very happy girl at the moment, and that makes me very happy too.**

**And something that makes me even more happy, is that SJ has come off the ventilator and has woken up. She is still very tired but she has smiled and been rolling her eyes at her friends' fussing over her. It's looking like there aren't any serious side effects from being on the ventilator for so long. So a thousand thanks for everyone who sent their best wishes to my fighting girls. I have been doing quite a few little happy dances this week.**

**To Boo. Naomi has indeed been on Effy's boat before, but she didn't know it belonged to Effy. Emily only ever referred to it as 'a friend's boat'. **

**This one goes out to all those Katie lovers out there. KFF makes me happy too.**

**I don't own Skins, but right now I'm so happy I don't care….**

**.**

**.**

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13. A Question Of Trust

Naomi

It has been a glorious week to say the least. Ever since I slept with Emily, my life has been fucking beautiful. Even Bob's accident turned out to be a sliver lining, as we have seriously upgraded in the boat stakes. The Catherine the Great fits much better with my fantasy image of my future career. Our first week's samples have been sent off to the lab for analysis by JJ, and being the efficient little fucker that he is, he's already begun sending us back data to feed into our model. Our video capture has been working like a dream, we've seen all kinds of wonderful species, and even encountered more turtles. Pandora is still here on a follow up surf course, so Thomas has been skipping round the place with all the enthusiasm of a spring lamb. And almost every day has ended up with Emily Fitch in my bed.

We seemed to have managed to skip the casual 'getting to know you' side of things, and leapt straight into Grand Passion. I spend all day thinking about her and by the time I get her in my arms again, I am so desperate to get her naked there never seems to be any time for 'shall we watch a dvd?' or 'fancy a trip to the pub?'. I'm sure those things will come, time to snuggle and be cosy, to have long, deep searching conversations, but we seem to be going about things backwards. From the outside it must just look like a lust-fuelled shagfest, something that would burn out with no companionship to sustain it. But those nights were something close to majesty. My scientist's brain struggled to understand what was happening to me. The way touching Emily made me feel. The things I saw in her eyes when I was inside her. Sex with Emily was a complex model. I was being fed data on a myriad of levels. Of course there was physical sensation, the girl had skills that could stimulate my nerve centres in ways that I had not yet experienced, but that alone could not explain the intensity of the pleasure I experienced when I was stimulating her. But there was also emotion, we had never talked about what we wanted, never had a conversation about being girlfriends or defining what we had. It didn't seem necessary. All those conversations were being had through touch, and they were far more intimate and deep than any nervous attempts at chatter. And there was escalation. Our first night was so sensational, I had worried that it would all slip into a disappointing decline from there, but the opposite was happening. The more I learned about her, the more I explored her body, the better it became. This feeling, this connection grew, and it was driving me towards a deeper and deeper passion.

The wave that was Emily had come to take me, but instead of floundering and letting myself get dragged under, I was riding it, letting its incredible power push me forward. Yes, it was still terrifying, but it was exhilarating too. I liked the woman I became round Emily. Now that she had let me take her as my own, the bumbling idiot that had been occupying my body when I first met her had fled, and in her place stood a sexually confident champion. Just knowing what I could do to her, what she would let me do to her, made me walk out into the world with a different step, and a different beat in my heart.

The days on the boat were magical. Effy was amazing. Despite her seemingly constant state of semi-intoxication, it didn't space her out like it did other people. In fact it seemed to make her come alive. She was incredibly knowledgeable about this part of the sea. She would take us on special detours to places she knew we could see marine life. We saw porpoises, dolphins and whales. She took us to a secluded bay where a solo dolphin had taken up residence. She had nicknamed him Freddie, cause every time she dived in the water he seemed fascinated by her presence and would swim and play with her until she came back to the boat. She was incredibly helpful, she began to look at my charts and current projections, pointing out changes that had happened in the last couple of years, and where currents were affected by seasonal variables. Bob hadn't given two shits about what we were doing as long as he had our money, but Effy was interested and engaged.

It almost made me forget the jealous funk I'd gotten myself into when I had watched them swim together. The way Effy was so chilled when Emily disappeared into her dive. Because she knew her. Because they had been close for years. Really close. Closer than the average best friends I would say. They seemed to have an unspoken language every bit as fluent as the one I was developing with Emily. They had a kinship, a deep sense of caring. I got the sense that to offend one, was to risk the wrath of the other. I was jealous of their easy and unsettlingly physical intimacy. I was jealous of all the memories they must have shared. All the things they had done out here on the ocean. I was jealous of how together they were, when they were in their element. I hadn't realised it until I had seen her in the water, but Effy and Emily were creatures of the same spirit, and I was worried that I couldn't compete with that. I knew that the nights when Emily had refused my company, she had done so to spend time with Effy. Effy had this fucking air of mystery about her, and when they were together it rubbed off on Emily too. My sweet openhearted girl took a step back, and a darker, more guarded Emily took to the fore.

I still had no idea what it was that Effy did. I asked her about it last evening, just as we were mooring.

"Import/export," she said, waving her hand vaguely. "Mostly import."

"What kind of stuff do you import?" I asked.

"It varies," she shrugged. "Demand informs supply."

"Don't go pestering Effy about boring business," said Emily, jumping onto the boat from where she had been waiting on the jetty. "Come here and give me a kiss."

Now that was a demand I definitely had to supply, but delicious as the subsequent kiss was, I couldn't fight the feeling that it was a distraction. That she didn't want me pushing things with Effy. Emily managed to distract me most efficiently for the rest of the night, but as I lay watching her beautiful form as she slept that night, my thoughts kept returning to her secretive friend. The only conclusion I could come to, was that Effy was a smuggler, and that Emily knew about it.

I knew that life was different out here, and that some aspects of the law were treated more as a guide than a set of absolute edicts, but I was still a little nervous that my entire project was now in the hands of a potential criminal, but what other choice did I have? And when Effy was being so kind to us, I felt a little unworthy for jumping to unproven conclusions, which were probably prompted by my jealousy of her relationship with my girlfriend.

I slept a fitful sleep that night, which was unusual these days, cause I usually just crashed out after all the shagging, but my 100mph brain had come back with a vengeance, and it had left me in a grumpy mood this morning. I was sitting at the kitchen table in the cottage, reading the local newspaper, whilst Emily was making coffee. My old self would have been slightly disturbed at how quickly she had settled in here, but Emily had exploded all my previous assumptions about the way the world worked, and I scarcely raised a murmur over the speed with which she was embedding herself into my life.

"Fuck's sake," I growled when a particular story caught my eye.

"What's up, hun?" said Emily, pushing my hair to one side and kissing the back of my neck.

Normally such erotic attentions would have made me forget what I was reading, but I was not only grumpy, but seriously incensed.

"They're opening another fucking pipeline in Pembrokeshire," I spat. "Isn't there enough fucking crap getting spat into the sea already?"

"It's only a transport pipeline, baby. Not a wastepipe," said Emily soothingly.

"Yeah, if you believe that," I grumbled. "Somebody should do something about it."

"If you feel that strongly about it, there's a protest going on tomorrow. You should go," suggested Emily.

"_We_ should go," I urged her.

"I can't," shrugged Emily.

"I thought you surfers cared about the sea," I frowned, disturbed that her sense of moral outrage didn't match my own.

"I've got stuff to do," said Emily.

"What stuff?"

"I have to help Effy with something," she said breezily.

"What kind of something?" I pushed.

"Just stuff," she said unhelpfully. "Anyway, gotta run. Can't keep the customers waiting."

She gave me a quick kiss on the lips and was out of the door before I could question her any further. I felt an icy fist grab hold of my heart and start to squeeze. Emily was definitely hiding something.

I would have asked Effy about it when we were at sea that day, but for some reason she was even more impenetrable than usual. And I had the uneasy feeling that the reason was that Emily had warned her. I struggled for a way to calm my fears, but it's kinda hard to slip 'what the fuck are you doing with my girlfriend?' into the conversation, without exposing yourself as a jealous bitch. I had no doubt that whatever I said would get straight back to Emily, so in the end I chose to say nothing, and chided myself for my paranoia.

As soon as we got back in range of phone signal, my phone beeped with a text message from Emily saying that Freddie's band were playing in Cardiff, and Katie was driving and did we want to go? Thomas was all for it, immediately calling Panda to invite her, but Effy's face was a picture of derision.

"Drive all the way to Cardiff to listen to that fucksplash mewling like a sick kitten?" she sneered. "I'd rather cut my own ears off with a blunt knife."

Jesus, she really hated the poor guy.

"Are you going to be ok?" I asked her, worried that we were leaving her alone to get lost in a bender of epic proportions.

"It's worse if I have to watch her drooling over him," she said. "I'll be better off here. Quiet night in."

I was sure that Effy's definition of a quiet night in probably differed from most, but at least she wasn't planning to go mental. I might have seriously mixed up feelings about Effy, but I didn't want to see her hurt herself.

Katie and Emily were waiting for us in the harbour, as we would have to leave straight off to catch the gig. When I saw what Emily was wearing all my paranoid thoughts evaporated in an instant. She was in a clingy red velvet dress that pushed her tits together in a most appealing fashion. She looked so fucking gorgeous, she and Effy could have been serial killers and I would have forgiven them. My feet anchored themselves to the gangway as I drank in the feast of her with my eyes. Thomas had to literally push me off the boat to get me moving again.

"God, you look fucking amazing," I said, once I had kissed the living daylights out of her. "I look so fucking scruffy next to you."

"You look sexy," countered Emily. "All windswept and wild, and fresh from the ocean. If we didn't already have plans, I'd throw Effy off the boat so I could have my wicked way with you right now."

I liked it. I liked the idea of getting one up over Effy, and the image that it gave me made me forget about everything else. Emily loved me, and we were going to party and drink and dance and come back home to have rigorously athletic sex, and all was good with the world.

"Katie, come on," called Emily, as Panda returned from the shop with an ice cream. "We need to get going."

I turned to see Katie and Effy staring at each other silently. They looked like a pair of cats, sizing each other up over territory, and I couldn't for the life of me work out what was going on in their heads. All I could see was the challenge, as if both of them were daring the other one to speak.

"Break it up, ladies," sighed Emily, grabbing her sister's hand and leading her from the scene. I dawdled behind the group as we walked off, principally so I could ogle Emily's ass in the clingy dress, but I could feel Effy's eyes burning into us all the way down the jetty.

.

.

.

Next afternoon the drizzling rain was starting to soak through the outer layers of my clothes, and I was about ready to commit mass homicide on the colourfully dressed samba band, who were destroying my already delicate state of health. My skull was pounding with every beat, and when the git with the beard had started blowing his fucking whistle, I was already forming a defence of justifiable homicide. The other protesters were dancing around and enjoying the music, but all I wanted was to kill, crush and destroy.

The gig had been brilliant fun last night, but I had gotten carried away. I had drunk like a fish trying to handle the ridiculous levels of lust that Emily was inspiring in me. Katie had pills and like an idiot I accepted one from her. She told me that they were really strong, and that I should go easy, but once again I had made the mistake of assuming that the countryside would only have rubbish drugs, and necked the whole thing in one go. I had a fucking amazing time on it, and it made me feel like a goddess, but it made me reckless and I seemed to believe that it was my personal mission to drink the bar dry. The post gig sex was also bedshakingly good. I must have been really drunk, but because of the drugs I wasn't feeling it, and though I say so myself, I was kind of proud of the way I'd made Emily scream for me that night.

But I was fucking feeling it now. Thomas and Pandora had made the same mistake as me, and were far from their usual bubbly selves. And all three of us spent most of the protest just wishing everybody would stop shouting, and wanting to murder the samba band. I felt suddenly powerless standing there outside the massive security gates of the refinery, surrounded by police and hippies. I began to wonder what the fuck we were doing there, cause nobody was going to listen to us. The company were probably laughing at the little group of greens dancing in the rain outside their gate. They probably thought we were fucking hilarious, cause we sure as hell weren't going to change anything. I was coming down hard, and I felt angry and frustrated.

It was evening by the time we got back. I felt like death, and all I wanted to do was collapse into the comfort of Emily's arms, and have her hold me until the aching went away. I tried calling her but there was no reply. I had Thomas drop me at her house, only to find the door answered by fucking Jenna almost gleefully telling me she was not in. I walked all the way to the pub with a growing hole in my heart. I wanted Emily. I needed her. This was another new sensation for me. I had never been so desperate for the company of any of my previous lovers. I always thought I could look after myself. But not now. I needed Emily to mend the hole in my heart. I needed her to fit against my painfully incomplete body. I needed her to bring the balance back into my shaky universe. I cast my eyes around as I walked into the bar, but no sign of Emily. And it hurt. It actually physically hurt. I spotted Cook and Jonno over by the pool table with a couple of other guys. When he spotted me, Cook put down his pint and swooped me up into a massive hug. I clung onto him for longer than I should have, but his arms and the genuine affection I felt in them were reassuring, and I didn't want to be lost again.

"Naomikins," he said enthusiastically. "About time someone brought a bit of glamour into our lives. How are you doing?"

"Not so great," I admitted. There was something about the boy that made me trust him. "I was looking for Emily. Have you seen her?"

"Of course you are," he grinned. "If Emily wanted to get in my pants, I'd be looking for her too."

"She's at sea," said Jonno. "Her and Effy are off on one of their jaunts."

Welcome back paranoia.

"What's that supposed to mean," I asked him a little too harshly.

"Nobody knows what they get up to when they go off like that," shrugged Jonno.

"But we'd all like to," smirked Cook.

"I like to think they're having loads and loads of lesbo sex under the stars on the roof of the boat," sighed Jonno, and I felt my fury rising.

"Except that Effy makes Emily wear leopard print and heels," laughed an unknown boy.

I punched him. I punched him hard and he went down. Red rage flooded through my body and I was about to start kicking him, when I felt Cook's strong arms wrap around my body and hold me back.

"Easy tiger," he said, laughing. "Give the boy a chance to apologise."

"Why the fuck should I apologise?" whined the boy. "She hit me."

"I could always let her go," offered Cook.

The boy mumbled a grudging 'sorry', and shuffled away, and I felt Cook's grip relaxing, but he still didn't release me completely.

"Are you ok?" he asked me. "What's got you so wound up?"

"What the fuck are they doing?" I asked, my tone laced half with anger, half with despair.

"Like I said, nobody really knows," replied Jonno. "Best not to ask really."

"What do you mean, best not to ask?" I challenged him.

"Well you know," said Jonno. "With Effy being a Stonem, and that…"

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" I spat.

"That she's a very private person," interjected Cook. "And even if you did ask, you probably wouldn't get anything out of her."

My paranoia had made itself so comfortable in my skull, it had its feet up on the sofa and was demanding I make it tea. I got the distinct feeling that fucking Cook was protecting them as well. I shrugged myself out of his grasp. I was sick of stupid men, and their stupid riddles, and their stupid lesbian fantasies. If I wanted answers, I would have to go to someone who knew Emily inside out, and who wouldn't fucking bullshit me.

For the second time that night I found myself outside the Fitches house. Once again Jenna answered the door and raised her eyebrows in surprise.

"Emily's still not home," she informed me.

"I haven't come to see Emily," I said. "Is Katie in?"

"Oh," said Jenna. "I think she's in her room."

She stepped aside to let me in. I think in my bedraggled state she even felt a little bit sorry for me. I knocked on Katie's door, and entered when she called me in.

"Wrong room," she said sarcastically, looking up from her computer. "Lezzer central's across the hallway."

I couldn't hold all the emotion and exhaustion in any longer. I started to cry, and Katie's demeanour changed immediately. She got up and pulled me over to her bed, sitting me down and putting her arm around me.

"What is it?" she said, gently. "Has Emily upset you?"

"I don't know. I don't know," I said, collapsing into her embrace and shaking from the weariness and the sobs.

Katie waited patiently until I had managed to calm myself down a bit.

"I'm sorry if this is a stupid question," she said. "But how do you not know if somebody's upset you or not?"

"Because I don't know what they're doing," I exclaimed. "And nobody will tell me."

"So I'm guessing this is about Emily and Effy, right?"

I nodded.

"That's because nobody really knows," shrugged Katie. "Emily and Effy have their own stuff going on. All I know is that it's important to them. If you're serious about Emily, you shouldn't try to get between them."

"But why are they so fucking secretive? I just want to know what they are doing, then I'll be able to handle it."

"Best not to ask," said Katie, squeezing my knee.

"No!" I said, standing up in anger. "I'm fucking sick of this 'best not to ask' crap. I want to fucking ask. I need to fucking ask."

"Ask what?" said Katie calmly.

And so finally I asked the question that had been smouldering in my brain all week, but tonight had erupted into flames.

"Are they fucking?"

Katie's first reaction was to laugh, but when she saw the distress in my eyes, she leapt up from the bed, and pulled me into a loose embrace.

"No, no," she assured me, cupping my head in her hands. "They haven't. They've never… They wouldn't. She wouldn't do that. Effy wouldn't do that to me."

"_Effy_ wouldn't do that to you?"

That was not quite the response I was expecting.

"She loves me," stated Katie. "She wouldn't fuck my sister."

"How do you know?"

Katie stopped her active comforting, and seemed to drift away for a moment into her own world. She drifted off and sat back down on the bed.

"Because she promised me," she said quietly.

I followed her over and sat down beside her. Despite my urgency to find my own answers, I was prepared for Katie to reveal hers in her own time. Katie's brown eyes delved into mine, as if she was deciding whether she could trust me.

"She promised me she would wait for me," said Katie.

Her voice was nearly in a whisper, and I got the feeling that this was information she had not revealed to anyone. She took a deep breath and continued.

"It was a year and a half ago, in Cardiff, at New Year's. We were all in this wicked club, and it was getting towards midnight. Everyone was getting fucking mental and we were having a brilliant time, but I'd noticed that Effy had fucked off somewhere. I know she's kind of a loner, but I didn't want her to be alone at midnight, so I went to look for her. She was standing on some balcony smoking a spliff, completely ignoring the anti-smoking rules. And she looked so fucking cool."

Katie laughed and smiled to herself, as she remembered the image.

"She always looks so fucking cool, eh? I asked her if she was coming back down cause it was nearly midnight, but she merely smirked and told me that institutionalised celebration was a farce. Normally I would have shrugged and left the moody bitch to it, but for some reason I didn't want to leave her. Maybe it was the drugs or something, I don't know. I tried again to convince her to come down and join us, telling her she would miss out on the midnight kisses. She looked at me, and then she looked right into me. Those bloody blue eyes of hers were cutting me open where I stood. She told me there was only one person she was interested in kissing, and it wasn't exactly rocket science to work out it was me.

She told me I should go and be with our friends. I knew she wanted me to stay, but she didn't want to stop me having my fun. I guess that's what sealed it, that she was thinking of me before herself. I stayed. I would let her have her midnight kiss. It was New Year's after all, I had an excuse, and what fucking harm would it do? I could feel my heartbeat accelerating with each number of the countdown that floated up from the chanting crowd downstairs. I was nervous, but I thought it would be fine, you know. Just a bit of fun. I didn't expect to _feel_ stuff."

"What did you feel?" I asked Katie.

"I liked it," she said honestly. "The countdown got to zero, and I was the one to close the gap. I wished her a happy new year and then I pressed my lips against her. I was surprised at how soft she was. I was surprised at the pleasant buzz I felt at her touch. But most of all I was surprised at how I didn't want it to stop. I let it slip way way beyond the pretence of a New Year's kiss, and soon we were full on proper snogging, tongues and everything, and it was sexy as fuck. It was only when I felt her hips start pressing against me, pushing me back against the balcony rail, that I realised I was out of my depth. I freaked out and I pushed her off me, but not completely away. I told her I couldn't do it. I told her it was too much. I told her I wasn't ready, but instead of getting angry or upset like I expected her too, she was really gentle with me. She took my face in her hands and told me she would wait for me. It was a promise, and she's been good for her word. She used to fuck around loads, but ever since that day she hasn't been with anyone."

"And you trust her?" I questioned, my own trust issues making me cynical.

"You weren't there, Naomi. You didn't see her eyes. She promised me she would wait for me, and she's been waiting ever since. She loves me."

"But you don't love her?"

Katie seemed to ponder the question deeply.

"I think I do love her, in a way," she said. "It's hard not to feel something when somebody holds such a pure emotion for you. You'd think it would be creepy, but it's not. I stayed there the other night, on her boat and it was lovely. I slept next to her and I felt totally safe. The one thing I do know is that I can trust her."

"So you love her, but you don't fancy her?"

"Well that's the thing," said Katie sheepishly. "When I woke up, she was kissing my back and stroking me. I mean she didn't know she was doing it, she was asleep. Apparently she does it all the time, she dreams about me, and gets a little handsy."

"Who told you that?" I said, already knowing the answer.

Katie's eyes shot up to mine guiltily.

"There's nothing going on between them, I promise you," she said. "It's me that Effy dreams about. And when she was touching me, before I realised it was her, it felt amazing. I even…. you know…. got wet. But then I woke up properly, and I just freaked out."

"So your body was loving it till your brain kicked in, and then you just had this kneejerk reaction because it was a girl?" I said.

"Well would you ever sleep with a man?" asked Katie.

My face must have told a story, because she laughed and raised an eyebrow at me.

"Kneejerk reaction much," she said. "I'm not just talking about shagging some dickhead down the pub. What if there was a beautiful guy, who loved you and cared for you, and you felt things when he looked at you? Could you do it, just cause he deserved you?"

Her words made me think. I'd never been with a guy, so I didn't have much to go on, but could your attraction for a person, outweigh your natural sexuality?

"I don't know," I finally admitted. "If that would have happened with anyone, I think it would have been Thomas, but I kissed him once and I didn't feel anything."

"Then it's different," sighed Katie. "I do feel stuff. I was upset that night. Fed up with this stupid situation we are in. Every new guy that comes through here I somehow hope is gonna be the one to break us out of our obsessions. You must have been mad to pass Thomas up, because he's lush. He was in the pub being fucking enchanted by Pandora. Another chance gone tits up. So I ran out into the car park and there she was. Even though I was upset cause I was trying to get away from her, she was still there for me. She will always be there for me."

Katie laughed again. I reckoned I needed to take a leaf from her book, because she could still find the humour in her dilemmas instead of collapsing into them as I did with mine.

"There's this moment in Terminator Two," she smiled. "Where Sarah Connor is watching the Arnie Terminator playing with her kid, and she realises that the machine would be the best dad she could ever find for him, because it would never ever leave. It would never stop looking out for him, and taking care of him. It would never neglect him or hurt him, or do anything bad to him. And that's what Effy is. She will never stop loving me, she will never hurt me, she will never let me down. She is in fact the best lover I could ever find, because her love for me is just so fucking…. good. She would never ever fuck me over. She's like the fucking Terminator of love."

"Jesus, Katie. What are you fucking waiting for?" I said. "She sounds fucking wonderful. If I found a love like that, I think I'd grab at it with both hands."

"You really are a bit dense sometimes," laughed Katie. "Don't you realise that you already have?"

"What do you know?" I asked her eagerly.

"She's my twin. The whole telepathy thing? It works. She loves you. I can feel it in here," replied Katie, placing her hand on her chest. "Ever since you turned up, it's like she's been more alive. I can feel how happy she is, not to mention the fucking racket she makes when you're shagging her. Even my stupid mother can tell that you're special to Ems, which is why she's not putting up a fight. If Emily and Effy have stuff that they need to keep between them, then they have a good reason for it. Effy's always going to be part of her life. You have to learn to trust Emily. She's a good person."

"You're right," I sighed, my limbs heavy with exhaustion. "I guess I still can't quite believe I'm lucky enough to have her, and I'm scared she'll wake up one day and realise her mistake. And I'm terrified, I'm just fucking terrified, because I don't know how I could live if that happened. I love her so much, and I know it's only been such a short time, but I just knew, I just knew as soon as I saw her that she was going to own my heart."

"You look knackered," said Katie kindly. "You should stay here tonight. Go sleep in Emily's bed."

"You don't think she'd mind?" I asked.

"I think she'd be delighted to come home and find her blonde bombshell in her bed," laughed Katie.

"Her blonde bombshell?"

"I'm seriously violating twin rules here," smirked Katie. "But yeah, that's what she calls you. Of course, tell her any of this conversation, and I'll have to bitchslap you down."

I drifted off to sleep surrounded by Emily, by her things, by her scent, her essence. But it was Katie that I thought of as my brain slipped into unconsciousness. We had something in common. We both had to look beyond the unbreakable bond that was Emily and Effy. And we both had to stop being afraid.


	14. An Element Of Risk

**Well hello again. It's been a while, but it was the end of the festival and there was partying to be done. And we all know how Hypes loves to party. Brilliant old friends, fabulous new ones… ladies with Scottish accents, what's a girl to do?**

**Medical progress continues apace, SJ is doing better, and Cat is now a tube-free crouching tiger of energy waiting to run amok in the outside world. Fingers crossed it will be very soon. Go Cat, you awesome devil. This chapter may feature on the blushometer, so watch out for those nurses and get stuck in. For the rest of you, standard warning applies.**

**Enjoy.**

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14. An Element Of Risk

Emily

I was stuffing my face at Rita's café, when I saw her. Rita's breakfasts are second only to Katie's on the whole peninsula, and it takes a lot to distract me from one. But when I saw Naomi walking past on her way down to Effy's boat, I had to fight my natural urge to run to her. I had been up all night and I was exhausted. Far too exhausted to face the bevy of questions I knew she would have for me. I hated having to conceal things from her, but the fact of the matter was I had only known her a couple of weeks, and the less people who knew about this shit the better. All the locals knew well enough to leave me and Effy alone, but Naomi was a scientist. It was her job to ask questions. So I skulked like a coward behind a menu, and let her go past unhindered.

Effy was taking them out in the boat again today, but when I left her she just took some drugs to stay awake and I had no doubt she would be fine the way she always is. Naomi would get nothing out of her. Effy never bothered to make up lies. If she didn't want to answer a question she would just smirk silently in that way of hers, until the inquisitor gave up. Effy never capitulated. She was always stronger than anyone who challenged her, even me on occasion. I suspect the only person who could get the better of her was my sister, but Katie was smart enough to realise that some things were better left unknown.

I would need the day to recover before I was strong enough to face Naomi. Some sleep and then some time in the waves, and I would be myself again, ready to flirt and divert my way out of trouble. At least I hoped I would be. It was nerve-wracking how quickly Naomi had gotten in so deep. Could I really look into those mesmerising blue eyes and bullshit her? Even if it was to protect her as much as us? The fact of the matter was I didn't want her to know what we had done. It wasn't as if I didn't think I could trust her, in fact all my deepest instincts were telling me that I could. But I didn't want to implicate her. Effy and I had nothing to lose really. My Dad would carry on employing me whatever, and I'd probably become some kind of hero amongst my peers. And Effy? Well it wasn't like she'd exactly be disappointing her family, was it? But Naomi had a bright future ahead of her, an important one, and I didn't want to fuck that up for her by making her into an accessory. I know we had been careful, but there was always going to be an element of risk.

I had texted Naomi later in the day asking her if she wanted to come out for a drink. I figured neutral ground with lots of other people around would be the best way to ease myself back into this. In fact I then had the bright idea of making it into a group night out, and started ringing round everyone else too, reducing my chances of being cornered by my girl. I was walking through the village towards the pub congratulating myself on my cunning plan when I found myself outsmarted by Naomi again. She was lying in wait for me in the little alley down the side of the old post office, and grabbed me as I sauntered past.

"Hey gorgeous," she said, pulling me into a deep searching kiss.

"Hi babe," I said breathlessly, once she had released me for air.

My cunning plan lay in tatters. I was unfocussed and unguarded, and all I could think about was getting her mouth crashed against mine again as quickly as possible. It was ridiculous how easily she could undo me, but right that second it didn't matter. It didn't fucking matter at all.

"I missed you," she said, pushing me up against the wall of the alley. Her leg went straight between my thighs and she started grinding up against me and attacking my neck with her lips and teeth. I couldn't help a moan of appreciation escaping my throat, and I felt her hands sliding upwards towards my chest.

"Ooohh, go on Blondie, touch her boobs," said a painfully young voice from the roadway.

Naomi pulled back and shot the scruffy boy the look of a thousand daggers, but I had to stifle a laugh. Fourteen year old Billy was my biggest fan, and was desperate to see me getting down and dirty with some hot girl on girl action.

"If you don't fuck off right now, Billy McAllister, I'm going to tell your mum where you hide your spliff."

"You wouldn't," the dark-haired boy said with a look of horror on his face.

"Wouldn't I?" I replied, arching an eyebrow at him.

"Sorry, Emily," he said, backing off and running away down the street.

"I guess his mum doesn't approve of him smoking then," said Naomi, her pupils still wide and dark and hungry.

"Oh no, his mum's a massive stoner," I laughed. "She would nick his stash and smoke it herself."

"This place is all upside down," said Naomi suddenly. "Nothing's ever what I expect it to be."

I detected the overtones of deep thought in her words and decided I needed to get us out of there.

"Pub?" I suggested.

"Fuck the pub," growled Naomi.

She grabbed my hand and pulled me further down the alley, round the corner into the little garden at the back of the now defunct post office. Before I knew it I was pushed against the wall again with Naomi's tongue deep in my mouth and her hands pulling at the zip of my hoodie. She yanked it open and reached under my top, her fingers seeking out contact with the flesh of my belly. There was a ragged urgency to her actions, but I found myself getting turned on by how desperate she was to get at me. I felt the warmth of the moisture pooling in my knickers, as she squeezed my hardening nipples through the fabric of my bra and drank me in with her hungry kisses. Her hips were grinding furiously against me, and I knew I wasn't getting out of this garden before her hands had been down my pants. Not that I cared, I wanted her to fuck me up against this wall. All my earlier anxieties were lost in this fabulous bubble of lust. Once again, I abandoned myself to it. There was no outside fucking world. There was no pressure, no secrets and no bullshit. Only me and my honey in this crucible of furious muscular desire. She kept on kissing me as she fumbled impatiently with the buckle of my belt and the buttons on my baggy combats, effectively pinning me to the wall with her mouth.

"Right here, baby?" I questioned, as she tore away from me for a moment to look at her target.

I got my answer as she finally defeated my trousers and plunged her hand straight down my pants, swearing with delight at the wetness she found there.

"Right fucking here," she said, thrusting herself inside me. "Right fucking now."

"Oh fuck yes," I gasped as she grabbed my hair and began pushing in and out of me. She was using the full weight of her body to force herself deeper inside me. I was being taken without a shadow of a doubt. She was sucking and biting at my neck, and I knew she was marking me, but it felt fucking phenomenal. I bucked my hips hard against her, loving the feeling of her fingers in my cunt. It was rough and it was dirty, but I couldn't get enough. I had never let anyone fuck me like this before, but her aggression only made me want her more. I was moaning and swearing and offering protestations to God, little caring if any passers by could hear me. The only time I was silenced was when Naomi made me shut up with her filthy volatile kisses, and even then I had to groan into her mouth, which only made her fuck me harder, and me fall even more helplessly into her hands.

"Fucking hell, I want you," I cried, as I felt myself tipping towards climax. "Make me come."

She looked at me with pure fire in her eyes. Who would have known that my adorable little science geek was such a sex fiend? I even began to wonder if she was some kind of secret agent or superhero, and the mild mannered biologist was merely her secret identity, because the things she was doing to me were beyond my experience. This violent, carefree, animal sex was new and glorious, and I had only ever experienced this kind of rush on the wave. My fists balled up into the fabric of her clothes as I screamed my way through an orgasm of epic proportions, my body banging back and forth against the brick as my lover consumed me without mercy.

If you had seen us going at it like banshees, I guess you would never have described it as beautiful, but that's what it was. It was the most beautiful feeling on earth. We clung silently to each other for what seemed like an age after I had finally come down, clutching great grasping lungfuls of air to ourselves as we recovered. I loved the way she always stayed inside me, keeping the connection as though she was mentally recording the moment for posterity, cataloguing every last detail of the encounter with that rich photographic memory of hers. By the time she had finally pulled out of me, all trace of her aggression had gone, and she kissed me tenderly, and stroked my cheek. But when she looked into my eyes, the intensity remained. Much as though I had loved every minute of what she had done to me, I realised it hadn't come from nowhere. It hadn't been about loving and sharing, it had been about ownership. That wonderful aggression had been driven by something and I needed to find out what. Things were indeed upside down, and instead of being relieved that I had avoided her questions, she had only left me with questions of my own.

"So what was all that about?" I asked her.

"What was all what about?" she said, feigning innocence, but I could see the guilt in her eyes. I stared her out.

"I told you, I missed you," she said. "Do I need an excuse to make love to my girlfriend?"

"Naomi, that was not making love," I said gently, trying to keep any hint of accusation out of my voice. "That was fucking. That was you fucking me through the wall."

She blushed bright red, and lowered her eyes to the floor.

"I don't know what came over me," she mumbled.

I cupped her cheek and lifted her face up to meet my eyes.

"Yes you do," I prompted.

I was not expecting what came next.

"I love you," she said urgently. "I love you so fucking much."

Her ever-startling blue eyes were full of so much emotion I stopped breathing for a moment.

"Oh," I eventually stuttered. "So, it's not just me then."

Her face was a picture of shock, and I could almost see the cogs whirring in that beautiful brain of hers and she worked out what I meant.

"You do?" she said incredulously.

"Yes," I said. "I love you too."

She flung her arms around me and held me tight. I did the same, breathing in her scent, and marvelling at the fact that we had both just admitted something I had suspected from day one. That we were already deeply in love.

"I'm sorry," she said, softly withdrawing to face me, clasping my hands gently in her own.

"For what?" I asked her.

"For being so… brutal," she said, her feet shifting uncomfortably.

"Naoms, I can't lie," I said, pulling her back into my arms. "I fucking loved every minute of it."

"Really?" she said.

"What can I say, babe? You're a sex goddess."

She giggled shyly, and there was my adorable geek back again, but I loved every aspect of her, and I wanted to know all of her.

"But I still want to know where it's coming from," I said.

Naomi took a deep breath as if steeling herself for some kind of confession, before fixing me with an unwaveringly honest glare.

"I get jealous," she admitted. "I am jealous of Effy."

"Sweetheart honestly," I assured her, kissing her forehead. "There is nothing going on between me and Effy."

"Oh I know it's not sexual," she said. "But there is definitely _something_ going on between you and Effy."

Fuck. When I thought we had been distracting ourselves from the issue with sex, she had been showing me her fears.

"You disappear together," she continued. "No one knows where the fuck you are or what the fuck you're doing, and it hurts, Emily. I hate it that you have secrets with her. I hate it that you have this whole other life that I'm not allowed to be part of."

I didn't have an answer for her. It ripped me up that I was hurting the woman I loved, but what could I do? Then once again, she surprised me.

"But Katie told me that I had to learn to trust you," she said. "And she was right. Loving you means I should love the things that matter to you too. Which means I've got to learn to respect whatever it is that you and Effy need from each other. She's your best friend, and she's known you a lot longer than I have. I'm not saying that I'm never going to stuff it up, because I'm human, and foolishly paranoid, but I love you, and I'm going to try."

"God, you really are some kind of fucking amazing," I said, kissing her.

"Naw, I'm just some dumb blonde who got lucky," she shrugged. "And now I'm trying not to blow it. So how about a pint?"

"Why don't we just go home?" I suggested. "We can curl up on the sofa with some stupid movie."

"That sounds just about perfect," grinned Naomi.

My Dad was in the living room when we got back to the house, watching the news. His face lit up when he saw us.

"How's my two lovely ladies?" he grinned, drawing the pair of us into a mighty Fitch hug, somewhat to Naomi's alarm. "Fancy a cup of tea, or would you like something a little bit stronger?"

We both decided on tea, and Rob wandered out to make us a brew. I pulled Naomi down into the copious comfort of our settee and wrapped myself around her. She quickly became distracted by the stories on the TV, but the most important news in my life was that Naomi Campbell loved me, and I was happily replaying that story over and over again until my Dad returned with the tea. I got up to help him, and didn't notice that the programme had changed from national to local news as I did so.

"Holy fuck," I heard Naomi exclaim behind me, and in an instant the meaningless drone of the newsreader became a crystal clear series of words describing actions.

"Holy fuck," Naomi repeated. "Someone blew a chunk out of the pipeline."

"Good on 'em, I say," said Rob, setting down Naomi's tea in front of her. "Those companies are way too irresponsible with the future of the environment, eh Naomi? You'd know all about that, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah, well I went to the protest at the weekend," she said.

"Ha ha, well these guys went a little further than that, eh?" laughed Rob. "What do you think, Ems?"

My brain was racing at a thousand miles an hour. Say something light and meaningless, it commanded me. Or best of all say nothing. Say nothing. Say nothing at all. So what idiot part of me decided to sit down next to Naomi, and whisper cheekily in her ear?

"Looks like someone decided to do something about it."

The news report went on to say that responsibility for the action had been claimed by some mysterious group who named themselves The Sea Ninjas, that had been involved in direct action against pollution, whaling and over-fishing all across the world, but no one had ever been caught. Naomi was delighted. It seemed she knew all about The Sea Ninjas, and their activities, well as much as anyone on the outside could know.

"I fucking love those guys," she said excitedly. "They don't fuck about. They choose their targets wisely and efficiently for maximum effect. They're proper full on warriors."

"But what they do is illegal," I said.

"Sometimes that's what it takes," she said seriously. "They make sure they never hurt anyone. Environmental crisis isn't a fucking joke, Ems. I'm glad that someone has the balls to take it on."

"So you approve then?" I asked her.

"Approve?" she said. "I'm fucking ecstatic. I felt so fucking useless, poncing about in the rain with a fucking bad samba band, but all the time the ninjas were taking advantage of the distraction to put their plans into action. It's awesome. I finally feel like I've done something useful, however indirectly. I mean Sea Ninjas right here in Wales, can you imagine?"

Naomi continued chatting animatedly to my Dad, until he started fishing brainless action movies out of the cabinet to entertain us with. I had to love him for that, for providing us with the perfect distraction to give me another few hours of respite to think my way out of this. But as I lost myself in the choreographed ballet of guns and explosions, I knew it was only going to be a temporary reprieve, before the consequences of a very real explosion would rear up their untamed heads.

I didn't even make it as far as sleep, before she slid herself on top of me and kissed me way more tenderly than she had before. The effect, however, was just as potent, and I felt myself being drawn under her spell again. This time the way she touched me was artful and delicate, but it soon had me craving her just as badly. She kissed her way skilfully across my torso, setting my nerves alight, before returning to my face and kissing me long and slow on the mouth. By the time she pulled away, I was ready to give her anything she wanted.

"Was it you?" she whispered.

"Huh?" I said, dragging myself reluctantly from my sex trance to find Naomi looking down at me with deathly serious eyes.

"Are you and Effy Sea Ninjas?" she asked.

I closed my eyes and sighed. She was clever. She had lured me into a vulnerable position and now she was taking advantage. I couldn't tell her the truth. Cause the truth was yes. Me and Effy weren't out at sea shagging or taking drugs as everyone else suspected. We were out there sabotaging a pipeline with explosives we'd acquired via contacts from Effy's dodgy family. Yes, it was for the cause, but we had inflicted major criminal damage, and I couldn't involve Naomi in it. She had been so excited by the thought of the Sea Ninjas, I could only imagine how much more thrilled she would be if she found out she was fucking one. But I had to keep my ego out of this. I was a soldier, and I had to protect the mission.

But I couldn't lie to her either. I couldn't look into those beautiful eyes and feed her some kind of crap, not when I loved her this much. So I said nothing.

"So I guess this is one of those 'best not to ask moments'," she smiled down at me.

"Naoms, I…"

"Ssshh," she said, stroking my hair. "It's ok, I get it. You could tell me, but then you'd have to kill me kind of thing."

"I wouldn't go that far," I smirked. "I might have to keep you prisoner though."

"Oh," she grinned back at me. "And would there be restraints of some kind?"

"Don't," I shot back at her before my mind started taking me to very bad places.

"Seriously, do you have any idea how fucking cool you are right now? You blew up a fucking pipeline."

"I never said that," I said firmly.

"You didn't have to," she whispered into my ear before nibbling at the lobe. Shit, this girl was going to get me in serious trouble.

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"You are in serious trouble, Missy," Effy glared at me.

"Why?" I protested. What have I done?"

"You told her," said Effy accusingly.

I opened my mouth to protest my innocence, but the words dried in my mouth under my best friend's penetrating stare. Effy always knew the truth.

"How do you do it?" I sighed melodramatically.

"She has spent the last week looking at me like she wants to rip my head from my shoulders, and yet today she is suddenly looking at me like she wants to give me a medal. Not hard."

"I didn't tell her," I insisted.

"But she worked it out, and you failed to come up with a convincing lie to cover your arse," said Effy, her voice softening slightly.

"I can't lie to her, Eff. I love her."

Effy scoffed at me derisively.

"Oh yeah?" I said challengingly. "What if it was Katie? Could you lie to her?"

"That's different," countered Effy. "You've only known Naomi two weeks. I've known Katie for three years."

"And exactly how long did it take you to fall in love with her?"

"About thirty seconds," admitted Effy, smiling the smile I only ever saw when her head was full of Katie. "But at least your sister knows when not to ask too many questions."

"Naomi has to ask questions," I replied. "It's in her nature."

"And that's what makes her dangerous."

"She won't say anything," I said soothingly. "We can trust her."

"I hope so," said Effy. "I wouldn't want to see your cute little arse in jail."

"Like your Mum wouldn't bribe the judges, or whisk us away to start a new life in Rio de Janeiro or some such place."

"Do you think Katie would like Rio?" mused Effy.

I shook my head and pushed her in the water, jumping straight in after.

"I don't know about badass eco-warriors," I laughed at her. "But we're certainly both idiots for love."


	15. An Exercise In Cool

**Release date grows ever nearer for Cat, and she seems to be doing swimmingly. She has had all of her IVs removed now and I'm sure there is plenty of rebel walking and nurse terrorising going on. So I'd like to be greedy and steal some of your incredibly effective healing vibes for myself. This chapter has been incredibly difficult to write, not from any kind of writer's block, but because I currently have a leg injury which makes it impossibly painful to sit down. So this has been typed in fits and starts either lying on my side with one hand, or standing up, or having to get up every 2 minutes to move around. But you can't keep a good woman down, and here it is eventually. **

**And in a typical piece of annoying fuckery my internet dongle has just run out, and I have to save my money for the osteopath. So I'm off out in search of poachable wifi, so I can post this. Ha ha, it reminds me of the beginning when I would have to break into an abandoned railway station in Belgium in order to find the wifi to post IHAFICC. Always an adventure with Hypes.**

**Till next time, and hopefully with a functioning leg…**

**Your non Skins owning author xx**

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15. An Exercise In Cool

Naomi

"So, are you actually going to let me make it to the pub this time," smirked Emily as we walked hand in hand through the village.

"Not if you keep looking at me like that, I'm not," I retorted.

"Hey, is it my fault that you find me irresistible?" she laughed.

"It is when you go out of your way to try and make me horny."

"It doesn't take much."

"Fair point," I conceded. "But all available evidence points to the fact that my own elevated levels of sexual desire are entirely matched by those of the other party."

"The other party?" mused Emily. "Who's she then?"

"Fuck you, Emily."

"Yeah, you'd like that, wouldn't you?" she said, flashing me her oh so convincing bedroom eyes.

"Yes I would. And I'd be more than happy to give you a repeat performance," I said, looking over to the alley by the old post office. But you were the one who said you were neglecting your friends, and that we should make the effort to go out with everyone."

"You're right as always, Professor Campbell," she grinned. "How did I manage to bag myself such a smart girl?"

"Well, as you know I am studying the marine life of the area," I said. "And you are by far the most fascinating specimen I've come across so far. Well worth an extended study, I'd say."

"Happy to help," she smiled. "All scientific investigation should be thorough."

"Oh I think it's safe to say I will be dedicating a fair bit of study time to this particular subject," I said happily.

There was no way of denying it. I was a smitten little kitten. Ever since I had stopped getting myself so worked up about Effy, things with Emily had been nothing short of paradise. I was slowly beginning to discover the woman behind the body I had thrown myself so shamelessly at. My brain and my heart seemed to be coming to some sort of an agreement. Even though I couldn't truly make myself believe in love at first sight, everything I learned about Emily only seemed to prove that my reckless heart had been right about her. Not only was she a phenomenal shag, but she was actually really good fun to be with. I loved all the light hearted banter that flew between us, and I loved the way she made me feel more confident. Not in the arrogant, defensive intellectual superiority kind of way I had sometimes been guilty of in the past, but in a far more genuine, open, trusting in myself and others kind of way. Like she was. You would never hear Emily put herself down, but she would never use her self-belief to put down others. Even after this short amount of time I could feel her influence, and I knew that she was good for me. I felt so much more relaxed out here in the depths of nowhere with all the eccentric characters that surrounded me. I didn't feel like I always had something to prove. You are always working with the stereotype that people are less tolerant and more small minded away from the cities, and maybe that's true of small towns with ambition. But way out here, nobody seemed to give a fuck who you were as long as you weren't an asshole, and even if you were they somehow didn't make that big a deal of it.

Maybe it was the calming influence of the water. The sea was everything here, surrounded by it on three sides as they were. Certainly my days out on Effy's boat immersed in the beauty of the ocean and some of the finest drugs known to humanity were seriously beginning to chill me out. I couldn't think of a finer way to spend my days, and I definitely couldn't find a finer way to spend my nights.

I had to admit, I was a little bit in awe of them both. Emily and Effy were heroes. Real, fucking bona fide action women heroes. They did the kinds of things that people like me only talk about. I was seventeen when I first heard of the Sea Ninjas. My Mum had been fishing about on Indymedia, and had called me over when she'd found a story about them. It was just when I was starting to get really interested in marine biology, and she was always one to encourage me. Right from the off, I had loved their sneaky sense of style. In that first story I read, they had simply snuck into harbour where a fleet of illegal whalers had berthed, and removed the propeller from every single one of them in one night. The ships couldn't report them, because their own activities were suspect, but the ninjas publicised it anyway which led to an investigation and confiscations and massive fines for the captains. I had been following them ever since as they had been involved in actions all over the world. It had always amazed me how they could be so global, and yet never get caught, but now I figured it wasn't one small group, but a non hierarchical network of independent cells. And I was bang slap in the middle of the South Wales version.

It took a lot of effort for me not to just burst with over-excitement and beg them to tell me all about it, but Emily had been very clear that it was off-limits, especially with their action being so recent. And to be fair a couple of mornings ago it became perfectly clear why. The three of us had been chilling, having breakfast on the back of the boat when two guys in uniform came wandering up the jetty. I nearly shit my pants when I saw them, but Emily and Effy just carried on munching away as if nothing was wrong. I started taking deep breaths to try and calm myself down, but it wasn't much use. My heart was hammering in my chest when they stopped at our boat, and started to cross the gang plank.

"Hello Effy, Hello Emily," said the older of the two in a thick local accent.

"Hey Doug," replied Effy nonchalantly.

"Hi Carl," said Emily, waving at the young lad behind him.

"And who's this lovely young lady?" smiled Doug in my direction.

"This is my girlfriend, Naomi," said Ems. "She's studying marine conservation."

"Oh there's clever for you," smiled Doug.

"I've been taking her out on the boat for a university project," said Effy. "Naomi, this is Doug and Carl from the Coastguard."

I was so focussed on trying to keep a grip on my fear that I lost my grip on my knife and it went clattering to the floor.

"You alright there, love?" said Doug.

Effy was on it like a shot, bending down to retrieve it making sure her arse was in plain view, so that both men's eyes immediately wandered straight over to her, and they forgot all about me.

"She's just a bit tired," winked Effy. "Emily's been keeping her up nights."

Carl blushed bright red, but Doug allowed himself a little filthy chuckle before remembering he was here on business.

"So have you been out on the water much, sweetheart?" said Doug.

"Quite a bit yeah, why?" said Effy.

"Well, I don't know if you've heard about this pipeline getting blown up," said Doug.

"Yeah, it was on the news," shrugged Emily casually.

"Well we just wanted to know if you'd seen anyone fishy lurking about," said Doug.

"Not really," replied Emily, sticking her bottom lip out in the most adorable fashion. If I hadn't been quaking in inner terror, it would have made me go all goofy. Fortunately, it seemed to be having a similar effect on Doug.

"Nope, no fishy lurking," added Effy. "Apart from the fish."

Carl burst out laughing in the way women generally do when they're trying to impress a guy by finding his jokes funny.

"Apart from the fish," he giggled, before realising everyone was staring at him, and he returned to hiding behind Doug and flashing nervous lovestruck glances at Effy.

"Oh well," shrugged Doug. "Bit of a serious business, so we've got to ask about a bit."

"Sorry we can't help you, boys," smouldered Effy, as Emily continued to look as innocent as a cute little cherub.

"Oh that's alright," smiled Doug. "You ladies have a lovely day now."

The Coastguard guys took their leave, and the two coolest chicks I had ever met, just went back to eating breakfast as if nothing had happened. I waited for some kind of explosion of emotion, but none was forthcoming. I couldn't stand it a moment longer.

"What the fuck, ladies?" I exclaimed.

The pair of them stopped eating and turned their eyes towards me.

"How the fuck do you do it?" I said.

"Do what?" asked Emily.

"How did you stay so fucking cool?" I shouted. "And not only that. The pair of you wrapped those guys round your little fingers."

"Oh we've known Doug and Carl for ages," shrugged Effy. "They're sweet."

"Yeah, but that was before…" I stammered.

"Before what?" said Emily, calmly reaching for more toast.

"You know…" I said in a stupidly theatrical whisper.

"Nope. I don't know anything," said Ems. "Do you know anything, Eff?"

"Not me," said Effy emotionlessly. "I know nothing at all."

"And neither do you," said Emily, looking me straight in the eye.

I got it. Suddenly this shit was serious. Both of them were looking at doing time if they were caught, and I was just a dorky idiot who was more likely to fuck things up for them as to be of any use to them. The less I knew, the better. I had to temper my girlish excitement and realise that I wasn't cut out to be the dashing hero type. They weren't going to let me into the gang. I went to pieces under pressure. The story was the same one that had been playing the rest of my life. I was never going to be one of the cool kids. Fortunately for me, I wasn't allowed to wallow in my disappointment, as Thomas came bounding cheerfully onto the boat. I hadn't expected that, seeing as he had just had to say goodbye to Pandora.

"Coffee?" Effy offered him.

"Oh yes," Thomas. "That would be most excellent on this most excellent of days."

"Someone's cheerful," laughed Emily.

"Pandora has agreed to be my girlfriend," he smiled wildly. "I will miss her, but Bristol isn't so far. I think we can be happy."

I jumped up and hugged him, all the tension of the morning forgotten in the wake of his good news. Finally he had found a girl who's generous nature matched his own. His mood was so bright even Effy was smiling.

"Today is indeed a most excellent of days," she said, raising her mug. "To love."

"To love," we shouted, clinking our mugs together with the only one amongst us who hadn't found it. I felt ashamed that I had ever doubted this quiet champion of a woman.

It was much later when my own champion let her guard down for the briefest of moments in the deep dark silence at the centre of the night. She was kissing me gently down from orgasm after a blisteringly beautiful and intimate lovemaking session. I could feel the gentle weight of her immaculate body pressing down on me, and her kisses were still holding me in the lure of our own special private Utopia. These were the moments that I lived for, and I gazed up adoringly into her perfect warm brown eyes. The emotion that I saw reflected in them made me feel like I was wrapped up in marshmallow and chocolate. I had never known it was possible to get this close to another person.

"You know I love you, right?" she said.

I did. I had just felt it in every tiny fraction of her touch. I nodded my assent, not quite yet capable of returning to words.

"You know that what you do is just as important, yeah?" she said softly. "Information is power. No warrior can function without the intelligence to back her up. You show us what needs to be done. We're in the same fight, and it's the only fight that matters."

No words could possibly have expressed the massive amount of love I had for her right then, so I just reached up and pulled her into another sensuous kiss, hoping my lips could speak to her where my vocal chords could not. Her smile when we finally broke apart was the best thing in the world.

"I fucking love you, Ems."

Yeah, so I said it anyway. I'm a cliché, but I'm a cliché that's bursting with love.

"Yeah baby, you and me," grinned Emily. "Saving the fucking planet."

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"I fucking love you, Ems," I repeated, just before we went to push through the doors of the pub.

"Yeah baby, you and me," she smiled, holding up her fist to bump. "STFP."

"STFP," I laughed, grazing her knuckles with my own.

I may not actually be a badass, but sometimes she let me feel like one.

The first person we came across was Effy. She was sitting up on one of the raised areas in the corner of the pub. I guessed from the languid nature of her movements that she was already drunk. And when we got close and I saw her glassy eyes, I figured that wasn't all. She had formed the shape of a gun with her hand and she was pretending to fire it off over the railing beside her down into the body of the pub. But instead of a bang, she was punctuating her shots with a strange little hissing noise.

"That's a weird gun sound," I told her as I sat down.

When she looked at me I got a little shiver, for not only were her eyes rimmed with heavy dark make up, they also radiated darkness from within.

"I'm not an amateur," she said with a wicked smile. "It's got a silencer."

She turned back round and took another shot.

"Right between the eyes," she said with satisfaction.

I half stood up to see who she was aiming at, and saw the genial figure of Freddie, laughing with the boys next to the pool table. I heard another of Effy's silenced bullet sounds and turned back to face her.

"Straight through the heart," she said smugly.

"Effy,' scolded Emily. "Leave him alone, he's harmless."

But Effy was not to be deterred, even as she turned back round to face us.

"You know, all it would take is one phone call, and… poof!" she said, mimicking a tiny explosion with her hands.

"Effy no," said Emily sternly. "You left that shit behind for a reason, yeah?"

There was a genuine air of tension between them and it completely unnerved me. I knew that Effy could dark and mysterious, but was she really capable of having people iced? Who the fuck was she, a spy, a gangster, a terrorist? Whatever it was, it was serious enough for Emily to pull out the secret weapon.

"What would Katie think?" she said.

Effy laughed, and immediately her face was flooded with the smile that only came out for Katie. In an instant, the darkness that had been shrouding her dissipated, and she was just a wasted girl in a country pub again.

"She'd want me to be good," said Effy.

"So?" insisted Emily.

"I'll be good," promised Effy.

Satisfied with her work, Emily headed down to the bar to get us drinks, leaving me sitting impatiently on the thousand and one questions I wanted to ask Effy, but never would. On her way back, Emily grabbed the lads, and brought them back up to join us. Cook, Thomas, Jonno, and even the hapless Freddie (unknowingly dicing with a sticky end) brought their beer and their enthusiasm to the table.

"Good evening, fine and beautiful ladies," grinned Cook. "Any of you having a heterosexual moment? No? Ah well, can't blame a boy for trying."

And the truth was that none of us did. The fact that I didn't immediately bite his head off was evidence of my new more laid back nature. Once you got beyond the crude remarks and the lewdness, he was really just like a cute puppy who wanted everybody to love him. At first I had been amazed that Effy had already shagged him, back in the day before she made her secret promise, but since getting to know them both, I could see that there was still a lingering trace of genuine affection between them. Which was definitely more than could be said for her and Freddie. His enthusiastic puppy had been repeatedly kicked by the dark angel, but still he came back for more. I watched him sneaking covert moody glances at her, and wondered how he could convince himself that he was in love with someone who held him in such contempt. But Effy had decided to reign herself in in the interests of group harmony, and a couple of pints down the line, we were all enjoying raucous banter just like any other group of mates.

We were just in the middle of listening to Emily telling a funny story about some daft boy from this week's surf school, when I saw Cook's eyes practically bug out on stalks.

"By all that is hot and heavenly, we must praise the fucking Lord, for surely he has sent us and angel," he said in a woefully bad imitation of a southern American accent.

"Sweet merciful heavens," sighed Jonno, as all the boys followed his gaze.

I had learned from personal experience that any time a new fit girl showed up in this pub, it was a major cause for celebration amongst the local boys, and our table became a full on droolfest right about then. Even the newly enamoured Thomas was staring. I imagined that until recently, Emily would have been happy to join them, and I was disappointed to discover on glancing over at her to gain some solidarity, that she was looking too. I decided to temper my huffiness until I'd seen what all the fuss was about, and was immediately compelled to forgive Emily as the sight of the girl gave me a little flutter. I had to admit she was stunning. Small and petite, yet athletic, with long blonde hair and a glorious smile that could probably bring world peace if inflicted upon warring leaders.

"She is…" muttered Freddie.

"She's totally…" added Jonno wistfully.

"I would not kick her out of bed," grinned Cook.

"Hell no," agreed Emily. "Um, if I wasn't taken," she added guiltily.

I squeezed her thigh in reassurance.

"She is kinda fit," I admitted.

After a further bout of collective admiration, Cook stood up purposefully.

"Excuse me lads and lasses," he said. "Enough with the looking, it's time for the Cookie monster to get himself a little action."

But before he could successfully extract himself from the group I saw his face fall in shock.

"Shit," he said. "She's coming over."

We all turned as one to see that the newcomer was indeed headed straight for our table.

"Hi there. How are you all doing?" she said in a bright American accent, putting her drink down on our table.

We responded with a bunch of nervous 'fines' and 'yeah good thanks', before Freddie managed to gather his wits.

"So are you here on holiday?" he asked her.

"Oh really? Small talk?" she scoffed cheekily. "I saw you all checking me out, and I thought I'd save you the bother of deciding which one of you was going to have a crack at me first."

Cook howled with laughter.

"Feisty," he said. "I like it. How about you and me go and discuss the matter privately?"

"You weren't the only one looking, Mister," the stranger laughed. "I think everyone should get a chance."

"Ha ha, why not?" beamed Cook. "The Cookie Monster can be generous, and let these lesser men have a shot. I accept the challenge. We'll all give you our killer lines and may the best man win."

With that the blonde grabbed a chair from the next table and sat down in our midst.

"Right," said Cook, seizing the moment. "I'm Cook. I'm fit. You're fit. I want it. You want it. We owe it to the gods of fitness to get together and make beautiful mayhem."

The blonde weighed up his attempt for a moment.

"Forthright and to the point," she said. "And you have to admire that. But with one fatal error."

"What's that?" said Cook.

"I don't want it," she grinned.

"She shoots, she scores," laughed Cook leaning back in his chair and clutching at his heart. "You're up Fredster."

"Hi, I'm Freddie," he said, with what was an obviously practiced adorably dishevelled grin, going for the underground hero approach. "I play lead guitar, and I sing in a band."

"Ooh, cliché much," grinned the American, faking a cringe. "Not every girl gets swept off her feet by the hipster muso approach."

I swear they must have been able to hear Effy's cruelly delighted laugh in Cardiff.

"Oh, well, um, right then," muttered Jonno nervously.

I almost felt sorry for the guy. I had been on the receiving end of his bumbling attempts at a pick up, and I didn't give him much of a chance with the amusingly hardassed newcomer.

"Um, I'm Jonno," he said. "And um, I think you're really gorgeous."

"You're sweet," she said, and I got the feeling that this put down was going to be dealt with more kindly than the others. "But everyone here seems to think I'm gorgeous, so you'd have to be a little bit more creative than that."

"Oh, right then," said Jonno, staring glumly into his pint.

"I'm Thomas, so pleased to meet you," said my best friend. He had been in this country for years now, but he could still pull off his faux-naïve Congo charm when it suited him. "I'm afraid I have a lovely girlfriend so this is only for the sport, but 'Maîtresse, embrasse-moi, baise-moi, serre-moi, Haleine contre haleine, échauffe-moi la vie, Mille et mille baisers donne-moi je te prie, Amour veut tout sans nombre, amour n'a point de loi.'"

"The fuck was that, Thommo you smooth bastard,' said an astonished Cook. "I'm fucking glad you've got a girlfriend."

"Nice touch," smiled our new friend. "But I'm afraid I don't fall into the category of American who is so easily swayed by the simple addition of a foreign language."

"So you don't fancy any of us?" moped Freddie.

"What's wrong with this picture?" smirked Cook, clearly enjoying this game too much to give up yet. "Four very different, but nevertheless fine specimens of manhood here, and she doesn't want any of us? I say we need to open up the playing field. Ladies…"

He opened up his arms gesturing to us.

"Show us what ya got."

I glanced over at the fabulous blonde. With her perfect hair and teeth and her feminine style of dress she didn't look like she played the ball from the leftfield. Probably had some hunk of a boyfriend back home and was just playing with the lads to amuse herself.

"I'm taken, Cook," said Emily, squeezing my hand to prove her point.

"Yeah, but I'm intrigued," answered Cook. "Come on, Emilio. Show us what sophisticated banter you used to win over Blondie here."

"Well I didn't exactly," grinned Emily cheekily. "I kissed her first, and then I asked her out."

"Well I can see how that would work," laughed the stranger.

Well fuck me and my jumping to stereotypical conclusions.

"Oh bloody hell," sulked Jonno.

"We're just going to have to face it man," howled Cook. "They're taking over the world. It's like 'Invasion of the Muff Monkeys'. Now that's a film I'd like to see."

"That's a film you'd like to be in, Cook," teased Emily. "One lone man and his weapon fighting to save the world from a vicious plague of lesbianism."

"Sometimes I really hate you, Emily," pouted Jonno, as Cook boisterously howled his approval of her scenario.

"Chin up, Jonno man," said Cook, punching him on the arm. "Emilio hasn't won yet. Let's see what our fabulous lady scientist can come up with."

I wasn't jealous of Emily's apparent success. I knew now that I could trust her, but I certainly didn't want her to have the last laugh.

"So, are you interested in the marine environment?" I asked the stranger.

"I'm very interested in the marine environment," replied the blonde.

Cook's laughter was pure filth.

"Nice one, Naomikins," he said. "Straight down to where it's salty and wet."

Emily snorted with laughter.

"I'm sorry to burst your bubble, Cook," she said. "But she is almost definitely actually asking about the sea."

"Well that's a chuffing boring pick up line," he smirked.

"Not so," countered the American girl. "It shows she's interested in my brains as well as my looks. I may be blonde, but I'm not a bimbo."

"Well, I make that a tie between our two luscious lezzers," said Cook. "Unless the high priestess of cool can snatch victory at the eleventh hour."

Effy said nothing, merely letting out a contemptuous breath and fixing him with a cold-eyed Stonem stare.

"Yeah, go on," goaded Freddie. "Stop being all superior and show us what you got."

She slowly turned to face him and I watched a furious dark fire erupt into life behind her eyes. Poor little clueless boy. He had just whipped out a bright red rag in front of her raging bull and he was about to get skewered. Effy downed the rest of her drink in one, and turned her hotness up to centre of the sun proportions. She waited until she had the blonde girl's full attention.

"I can get you any drug you want," she said calmly. "And I have a yacht."

"What's your name, beautiful?" asked the stranger, looking serious for the first time since this whole charade began.

"Effy," husked our dangerous brunette. "Effy Stonem."

"Well then, Effy Stonem. How about you and I get out of here?" said the blonde.

Every eye in the group turned towards Effy, waiting for her inevitable denial.

"Ok," said Effy.

Without a further word the two women got up and walked out of the pub together. A stunned silence hung over the table as we followed their progress in open-jawed surprise.

"Fuck me," said Cook eventually, fanning himself with a beer mat. "Looks like we have a lucky winner."

"What are we going to do?" I blurted out in a startled defence of my girlfriend's sister, before remembering that Katie's confessions had been for my ears only.

"Um, nothing," said a still gobsmacked Emily. "I'm always telling her she needs to move on. I just never expected that she actually, you know… would."

"Yeah, well maybe some other people round here should start following her example," said Cook, looking over at Freddie who was perfecting his kicked puppy look again.

"Think I need another pint,' said Emily, standing up. "My round, yeah?"

Jonno, Thommo, and Cook cheered her on, whilst Freddie and I remained lost in our reflections.

The poor boy looked fucking broken, but there wasn't much I could do for him. He had always been a lost cause as far as Effy was concerned. But I couldn't help but feel terrible for Katie. I knew despite her public indifference that this would fucking devastate her. I wanted to run after Effy and beg her to think again. I wanted to blurt out Katie's secrets and tell Effy to carry on waiting. I didn't want her to fuck things up when she was so fucking close to her prize. But then what if I was wrong? What if Katie was always going to be too scared to take a chance on the girl who loved her? She was the one who kept throwing herself at any half decent bloke she could to see if it broke the spell. What if she finally clicked with one of them and Effy was left alone? I sat there with a thousand contradictory thoughts whirling round in my head, paralysed between action and inaction like some nerdy modern day girl Hamlet. When Emily returned with the drinks, I threw myself gratefully into her arms.

"You ok, babe?" she asked me.

"I'm glad we didn't win," I told her.

"Oh I think we won," she smiled back at me. "I think we both won the day we met."

She drew me into a beautiful heartfelt kiss, and as the sweet sensations of her lips pushed thoughts of other people's dramas away from me, I found myself thanking the stars that, with the small exception of my girlfriend being a potentially wanted felon, my life was beautifully simple.


	16. Utopia

**If you don't like fluff then look away now, cause the first bit of this is several baskets of kittens worth of fluff. But this is Cat's story, and Cat wanted fluff, so Cat gets fluff and that is that. **

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16. Utopia

Emily

When I woke up from a relaxed and bountiful sleep I found myself wrapped round her again. It always felt so fucking perfect waking up next to this most wondrous of bodies. The sight of her beautiful face, the silky feel of her lustrous curves. The unique and intoxicating scent that meant only Naomi. The gorgeous little noises that she made in her sleep. And the warmth, my God the warmth that felt so much more than mere body temperature. Like the gorgeous balmy heat of a Mediterranean night that wrapped you up in its soothing goodness till the dawn. Or like settling down into the comforting embrace of a deep hot bath. I could feel my muscles relaxing every time I lay next to her. And no matter how long or how passionate the previous night's sexual adventures had been, I always woke up feeling rejuvenated.

I think it's fairly safe to say I was addicted. I've never been that desperate to have a partner, you know the way some people feel they need a boyfriend or a girlfriend to complete them. I've always been much more of a take the world as it comes kind of a girl. I have a twin, a crazy family, a good bunch of mates, I have Effy and I have the sea. Girls have come and gone within that steady framework, but I've never really clutched desperately at them hoping they'll turn out to be 'The One'. I've fallen in and out of what felt like love, but I've never done desperate drama. And yet now, with this, I find myself overcome. I spend almost every night with her, and when I don't it feels kind of weird and wrong. It's like she's meant to be here. Like the universe resonates to a different frequency when we're in proximity, a better and more harmonious one. It's not like my life was shit before she got here, but now that she is I don't think it will ever be the same again.

I lay there watching her as she slept and I was completely fascinated. I could look at her for fucking hours. I lay on my side next to her making maps of her features, and watching the changing light of early morning dancing across her golden hair. Every breath she took was a wonder to me, the rising and falling of her chest as artful as the finest ballet. The casual way her arms were splayed across the duvet was as moving to me as the greatest of paintings. And then the most sublime moment of all, the moment when her eyelids fluttered open and I got to gaze into the depths of the mesmerising boundless blue I loved every bit as much as the ocean.

She blinked, and smiled a fuzzy smile, reached out a lazy arm and softly stroked my cheek. Neither of us said a thing. The moment was too perfect for the invasion of words. Our hands clasped together on automatic and we just looked at each other, insane amounts of emotion spinning between us as we drank each other in. A tiny thought sparked in the centre of my heart, but soon my beating organ pushed it out into my blood and spread it through every part of me until I was consumed by this thought, and this thought alone. That if I had Naomi and the sea I could be happy for the rest of my life.

"You're so beautiful."

Her first words of the day, uttered with complete sincerity as she wrapped me in that perfect gaze of hers, had physical repercussions in every cell of my body. It felt like she was filling me with some unearthly kind of magic that made me feel stronger, better and even more myself than I was without her.

"I don't think I ever want to wake up without you," I said.

And I meant it. I didn't know how I could have meant it after such a short span of time, but I knew that I did.

"What's happening to us?" asked Naomi.

"You're supposed to be the clever one," I smiled. "I was hoping you could tell me."

"I have nothing to compare this to," she said.

"Me neither."

"I mean, I understand the physiology of attraction, but that knowledge has always undermined my sense of the romantic until now," she said. "I could give you a detailed chemical breakdown of desire, but this… I have no understanding of this. All I know is that I must have been a fucking awesome bastard in a past life to deserve you in this one."

"A scientist who believes in reincarnation?" I grinned. "That's novel."

"I don't really," she smiled. "That's more my Mum's kind of thing. I like the idea of it though, that you have lots of lifetimes to work out your shit."

"Most people would need several lifetimes," I laughed.

"But not you," said Naomi. "You're fucking perfect as you are."

"That's very generous of you," I said. "But we are in the honeymoon period. I'm sure you'll discover lots of my faults as we go on."

"Is that what you want, hun?"

"That you find out my faults?"

"That we go on?"

I tried to imagine a future without her and it seemed like the most absurd notion on earth.

"I love you," I told her. "And I want to be with you. I can't even begin to think of an alternative."

She leaned over and kissed me softly on the lips, and then immediately broke away so she could look at me again. Her smile was as bright as the sun breaking over the ocean when the new dawn was full of promise. It felt like every day would be full of promise with this most fabulous of creatures by my side. I was so happy I was fit to burst.

"I love being in bed with you," I said.

"Yeah right," she smirked.

"No, I don't just mean for the sex," I said urgently. "Cause with our track record I think we've proved we don't need to be anywhere near a bed for that to happen."

Naomi got flashback face, and it was the sexiest thing in the world, but I wanted to get my point across before we travelled down that road again.

"What I mean is that I love being in bed with you like this. This beautiful private intimacy in a space that's purely ours. I love the way you look at me. I love the way I wake up all tangled in you. I love the way you fill my senses. I love just holding you. I love talking to you when we're sleepy. I love the way I can just stare like an idiot into your eyes for hours. I love the way that everything about me just seems to fit with everything about you. I love sleeping next to you and absorbing your amazing energy, and I always wake up feeling better when I do. I love sharing my space with you. I love sharing myself with you. I love the way it feels like you're supposed to be here, like it's just so fucking right."

During the course of my speech, Naomi had somehow seamlessly and gracefully slid herself on top of me.

"I know," she whispered, looking down at me. "This is a perfect Utopia. And it scares me sometimes. I keep wondering when something's going to go wrong, and tear you away from me."

"Nothing's going to go wrong," I assured her. "We just have to trust each other, and believe in each other, and not let any of the stupid little things get in our way. We can choose to make this work for us. We can own our fate together."

"I like that," she said. "We can take this random encounter and turn it into something unbreakable. All it takes is chemistry."

"And we've got bucketloads of that."

"Emily Fitch, you are fucking fantastic," she said, kissing me.

"So are you, Naomi Campbell," I said, kissing her back.

We kissed and kissed again. Warm fresh baked scones and muffins of kisses. Nourishing and utterly delicious. With her long limbs wrapped around me I felt like nothing could ever hurt me. Somewhere out there I knew there was a vicious world, but it could never penetrate the fortress of love that we were building for ourselves. Even if someday we had to be an ocean apart as we fought to save the fucking planet, I would always have this moment, and the hundreds of other moments like this we would make for ourselves. We kissed and stared and laughed our way into a promise. We kissed and stared and laughed our way into a union. We kissed and stared and laughed our way into a future.

Maybe we would have just kissed and stared and laughed all fucking day, if the door hadn't burst open and a tiny me-shaped whirlwind flew into the room.

"Ems, can I borrow that blue top of yours, the one with the starfish on it? I've got that hot new rep from Quicksilver coming in and I wanna look all surfy… and Oh my God, fucking naked lezzers."

Naomi slid off me and lay on her back with a dirty smile on her face.

"Relax Katie, we might be naked, but we're not fucking," I laughed. "Just snogging."

"Ok," she huffed. "I'm just still not used to that kind of thing going on in this house."

"You're not going all Jenna on me are you?" I said accusingly.

"No, no, no," she said hurriedly. "I'm sure you and the professor here do beautiful things together."

"Then you should stick around," I teased. "You might learn something."

"Pfff, I don't think I need to learn anything about sex from you my little rug-munching sibling," she scoffed.

I turned round grinning to share the joke with Naomi, only to find that her dirty smile had been replaced with what looked like a sudden frown of concern.

"Second drawer down," I said to Katie, before turning back to my lover.

"What's up?" I whispered.

"Nothing," she said. "I just remembered something."

"Aw, that's fucking mint, babes," came Katie's voice from the other side of the room, as she held up the top. "I'll let you two get back to Lezville."

Naomi's frown of concern was soon mirrored by my own, as I watched her watch Katie leave the room. Whatever it was that was worrying her seemed to have something to do with my sister.

"She doesn't mean anything by it, you know," I said. "They're just words. It's just the way she talks. It's not meant as an insult. She loves me, and if you make me happy, she's gonna love you too."

"It's not that," said Naomi. "I know Katie's alright."

"Then what?"

"You have secrets," said Naomi. "Aren't I allowed to have secrets too?"

"Well yeah, you got me there," I conceded. "It's just, it's my sister."

"Then you're just going to have to trust me like you said we should," she said softly. "There's no life threatening drama going on here, but I won't break a confidence. It's not honourable."

Jesus Fucking H Christ in a basket with balloons on. Every time I think that Naomi has reached the limit of everything that is perfect, she says or does something so unutterably adorable that I have to constant redefine my parameters for love. The thought of her living by her own personal code of honour to protect the people she cared about was almost too fucking wonderful to bear. I jumped on top of her and smothered her face with kisses.

"I fucking love you Naoms, you fucking wonderful fucking lioness of a girl. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and if I ever forget that, just slap me."

"Maybe I could spank you instead," she smirked, raising one eyebrow at me.

"Now that would only encourage me to be bad," I argued.

"I have to encourage you?" grinned Naomi. "I thought it came naturally to you… Ninja."

I'm sure it wasn't her intention, but her use of that word yanked the outside world back into my consciousness.

"I need to go and see Effy," I said.

"Oh," said Naomi, her cheekiness deflating in an instant.

"I have to make sure she's alright," I said.

"She was getting laid by a hot blonde. I'm sure she's doing just fine," pouted Naomi, but the look in my eye stopped her dead.

"Can't you just phone her?" she asked.

"Effy tends to ignore her phone. It's always better to turn up in person," I replied.

"Ok," conceded Naomi with just a hint of pout. "So is this private Effy seeing, or together Effy seeing?"

"Jesus girl," I hissed. "How many more times are you going to try and make me fall in love with you this morning?"

"Infinity times?" she suggested with an innocent little shrug.

"Together," I shouted, as my heart swelled to a size that could barely be contained within my chest. "We can go together. Um, in a bit…."

Naomi's face suddenly didn't look so innocent any more…

.

.

.

A couple of hot shags later and I was still encased in the fortress of love as we breezed out of the house past my mother. And all the way through the scooter ride to the harbour. Even walking down the jetty with Naomi's hand clasped in mine I was still riding safely through the world in our charmed little bubble. It wasn't until I saw the blonde girl lounging on the back of Effy's boat looking like she owned the place that the pinprick of reality pierced my protection. I mean it was good right, Effy moving on? Even if I still couldn't quite believe it. But I couldn't help it. It was in my nature to worry about my best friend. Effy was the coolest fucking person in the world, and she was hardcore in ways even I didn't want to think about. But for as long as I had known her, Katie had the power to unravel her. And I had seen her get into some epically tragic states over my sister. What if she had slept with the blonde and was now being torn apart by guilt? What if she was heading into another phase of fuck the pain away shagging? Maybe I should try to be more optimistic, but I knew my friend too well. I had to find out what was going on so I knew how to support her.

"Hi girls," said the confident American, as we walked over the gangplank. "It's Emilio, right?"

"Emily," I corrected her from Cook's stupid nickname. "And this is.."

"Naomikins," smiled the stranger. "Though I'm guessing that's really Naomi."

"I didn't catch your name last night," I said.

"This is Cat," said Effy, emerging from the cabin with a full pot of coffee.

I took a good long moment to check her out. She didn't look stressed in the slightest. In fact she looked relaxed, and coherent and surprisingly bright-eyed for this time in the morning. Ok, I admit it, I was confused. I had expected angst and drama, but all I got was two extremely chilled out girls enjoying a spot of breakfast. Had this Cat girl actually broken Katie's spell? Effy caught me looking and sussed me out in a heartbeat, and I was treated to one of her most classic of smirks.

"Cat wants to hire the boat," she said.

"I am tracing my family tree," said Cat. "My great granddaddy was from these parts, but he was lost when his boat went down. I want to try and find the wreck."

"Of course we'll have to work it round Naomi and Thomas's schedule, and your classes," said Effy.

"Why my classes?" I frowned.

"I need a dive buddy," smiled Cat. 'And Effy said you were the best."

"Can't you do it?" I said to Effy.

"But these are deep and dangerous dives," she replied. "And you're much more experienced than me."

"Hang on a minute. Dangerous?" interjected Naomi.

"Not for the Queen of the Deep here," smiled Effy. "I swear she's got fish genes in her somewhere."

"I thought we were going to go with mermaid genes," I pouted.

"Mermaids are pure nasty," laughed Effy. "And you, my beautiful Emily, are the loveliest girl alive."

"Now that's something I can agree on," said Naomi, wrapping her arms around me from behind and kissing the back of my neck.

"So, do you have any plans for today?" asked Cat.

"Um no, not really," I said, feeling Naomi tense slightly behind me.

"It's a good day to go to sea," said Effy.

There was something in her look. It was only the tiniest of inflections, invisible to anyone but me, but it told me there was more to this than just a charming piece of business. Something that meant I ought abandon my ideas of a day of fluffy kitten love with Naomi. Nope, no running through meadows hand in hand for me. I needed to get Effy alone and find out what the fuck was going down, and until I knew, I needed to keep Naomi out of it.

"Ok," I said. "I could do with the extra money anyway."

"Cool," said Naomi. "Should be exciting."

"Boring more like," said Effy. "They'll just be underwater for ages."

"Yeah babes, you should take the chance to get some work done," I added. "I think I've been distracting you far too much lately."

"I suppose," said Naomi reluctantly. "Thomas has been getting on my case since his bloody girlfriend went home."

"I'll make it up to you," I promised her.

"I like the sound of that," she replied.

I swivelled round in her arms to kiss her goodbye and for a few precious minutes we brought ourselves back to Utopia. I lost myself once more in the softness of her lips and the endless waves of love that radiated from her. Whatever challenges the day might bring, if I had this to come back to I had no doubt I could defeat them. We left my lover on the shore, and as we sailed out of the harbour, I turned my attention to the two girls on the boat. The pair of them were just too bright and sweet and perfect to be believable. Effy doesn't live in bright, sweet and perfect land, and Cat, well let's face it, who the fuck _was_ she? I was desperate to grill Effy for information, not that I'd get anything out of her that she didn't want me to hear, but it wasn't until we were well out on the open sea, and Cat went below to check her dive gear that I had the chance.

"So?" I said firmly, trying to show that I wasn't to be fucked with.

"So what?" smirked Effy, fucking with me anyway.

"What the fuck, Eff?" I said angrily.

I had come here thinking she might need my help, and instead I was getting the silent superior treatment.

"Did you fuck her?" I hissed, deciding to take the direct approach.

Effy laughed at me like I'd just asked her the most ridiculous question in the world.

"No," she said.

"Why not?"

"She's not Katie."

Ok, so not moving on then.

"I have a girlfriend, and she's amazing," said Cat from behind me, making me jump.

Ok so they may not have been shagging, but they shared an alarming ability to be able to sneak up on a girl.

"So what was all that crap about last night?" I challenged her.

"They way those boys were perving on me I deserved to have a little fun," she answered. "Besides, it was a useful way of finding Effy without arousing suspicion."

"Suspicion of what?"

"Cat's a Ninja," said Effy.

Shit. I wasn't expecting that. We weren't supposed to have active contact with the other cells, that's the way we remained untraceable.

"So that whole granddaddy's boat thing?"

"A bunch of bullshit," laughed Cat. "I figured people would buy some crazy Yank on a nostalgia kick."

"Yeah, they probably will, but why are you here?" I asked her.

"Stingray," she answered.

"Is that a mission?"

"It's a person," said Cat. "A hacker. We think he or she is based in the UK somewhere, but wherever they are they are bloody good at what they do. We get a lot of useful information from them, and it always checks out."

"So what does it have to do with us?" I asked.

"Stingray has uncovered some information that leads us to believe that the pipeline you attacked was secretly a dual core pipe," said Cat.

"What does that mean?"

"It means there is a pipe within a pipe," said Effy. "And that as well as it's legitimate use for fuel transport, they were also going to use it for secret illegal waste dumping."

"What you guys did was amazing, and slowed the company down," said Cat. "But if we can prove the pipe was dual core, we can cause them some serious damage and expose the true nature of their operations."

"But that would mean…" I stuttered.

"Going back," said Effy. "To get evidence."

"Isn't that a bit risky?" I said.

"It's very risky," said Cat. "And I'll completely understand if you want to turn me down. You've already risked a lot, and it will always be your choice if you feel you can risk more."

"But if anyone can pull this off it's us," said Effy.

"You're right," I said.

I knew she was right. We were local. We had a reason to be out on the water. Cat was right about her cover story, people would buy it. Whether there was a wreck or not, people would happily believe me and Effy would take the money off the dumbass American anyway. We knew exactly where the breach was and we knew what we were fucking doing. The question was, did we have the balls to do it? Before Naomi I wouldn't have cared. I would have taken the challenge without hesitation. But I wasn't single anymore. I had someone else to live for, someone else's life to take care of. The thought of waking up without her in a cold prison cell, instead of in her arms in the warmth and luxury of Bed Utopia seemed suddenly fifty times more horrifying than it had before. Saving the fucking planet had just become a whole lot more complicated.

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.

**Cat also wanted to be a Sea Ninja, so I made her one. Ha Ha. You were all so suspicious of the mystery blonde, but she's definitely one of the good guys. Only a few more days, and she will be out of that damn hospital and off on her journey to save the fucking planet for real. Go CatAttack. You're every kind of awesome.**


	17. Complicated Creatures

**For my most excellent friend Cat. When I first found you, you were fighting your way back from the very jaws of death, and now here you are on the brink of hitting the outside world again. And I'll know you'll hit it running and then we'll all have to watch out. You are an inspiration.**

**This is probably the last chapter you'll have to read around the nurses, so I made it extra blushy (beautifully crafted and essential to the storyline notwithstanding).**

**The rest of you, you know the score… work/school/granny warning is in full force, yo. Hit it…**

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17. Complicated Creatures

Naomi

I could have called Thomas to give me a lift, but the day was nice enough so I decided to walk. Get some fresh air to shake off the sluggishness of the morning and prepare my body and mind for some work. Of course what it really boiled down to is that I wasn't yet prepared to steep my self in cold hard facts and figures, when all I wanted to do was daydream about Emily for a little while longer. This morning had been something else. The sex had been fucking beautiful as ever, but it wasn't that which had made the morning special. It was the tenderness. That gorgeous moment when I had woken up to her looking at me. And the way she looked at me. And the beautiful things that she said. And the moments when she didn't need to say anything at all. It was like something had shifted between us and we had come to an unspoken agreement. We weren't just sleeping together any more, we weren't even just girlfriends. We were partners, looking to a future that included the other, and sharing our hopes and our ambitions.

The fact that this was the kind of understanding that people generally came to after months or years of seeing each other rather than a few short weeks didn't seem to bother me at all. When I flashed back over the morning's events the thing I most remember was the feeling I got when she told me, 'I love you. I want to be with you. I can't even think of an alternative.' That's some pretty fucking deep shit going on right there, and yet for some reason it didn't send me running for the hills. I've never really known commitment. My Dad fucked off before I was even born, and my Mum's been through a string of lovers since then, some of whom were cool and some of whom were just plain awful. So I didn't exactly have much to go on. Until now the most abiding thing in my life despite my friendship with Thomas was my unrequited crush on Stacey Matthieson, and that was hardly what you'd call a healthy relationship.

Emily, on the other hand has known nothing but… The Fitch family might be slightly bonkers, but they are a solid unit. They live together, they work together, and despite their many ups and downs, their solid foundation is love. Rob and Jenna married young, and their kids have grown up knowing that family is everything, and that commitment, loyalty and hard work are part of what makes that family strong. Even Jenna's problems with Emily's sexuality weren't enough to tear them apart. There was no doubt that Emily was loyal. I only had to look at the way she looked after Effy to see that. For Emily there was no such thing as commitment issues. If she decided to take you on, it seemed you could trust her with your life. Maybe that's why Effy had such faith in Katie, she had seen the true power of Fitchdom, and didn't want to settle for anything less.

Except maybe now she had. She was pretty full on with her total inscrutability this morning. I couldn't fucking read her at all. The circumstantial evidence was damning though. She left with Cat the night before, and Cat was there first thing in the morning. The American was kinda gorgeous, and Effy was looking pretty pleased with herself. But then again, except when she's on a Katie inspired meltdown, Effy always looks pretty damn pleased with herself. I shook my head to shake her out of my thoughts. It's not like it was my fucking problem anyway.

I looked up to get my bearings, and realised I was just opposite the Fitchwater shop. I grinned at the daft 'Swim like a Fitch' logo on the front with its cheerful font and picture of a smiling fish. My brain is no longer mistress of its own destiny, for in an instant all the correct synapses fired to leap from cosy cartoon fish to fish of a much more interesting kind. The fish that swam around Emily's spine. I stumbled over a broken paving stone, and it took all my efforts not to go flying head first onto the pavement. As it was I more or less ended up on my knees as the sound of laughter tumbled round my ears.

"Very dignified, Campbell," said Katie.

I looked up to see her leaning in the doorway of her shop, arms folded and a cheeky smirk on her face.

"Daydreaming about my sister's tits again?" she teased.

"Her tattoo, actually," I admitted freely.

"Yeah, I've heard that goes down well with the ladies," she said. "And then the ladies go on down."

I felt a sudden stab of jealousy over all the girls that had been there before me, and I cursed myself that even on the day that she told me she wanted to get serious, I still fell fucking victim to my rabid insecurities.

"Has Emily had many girlfriends?" I asked Katie.

"A few," shrugged Katie. "You know, enough."

My face must have given me away, because Katie laughed at me again.

"Relax Blondie," she said. "None of them were really serious. I still think you're winning. Now, are you just going to mess up the pavement in front of my shop or are you going to come in for a coffee?"

She was halfway through making it when the Quicksilver rep turned up. I have to admit I was quite intrigued after the effort she had made this morning to see what kind of man was Katie's definition of 'hot', but then again she had managed to fancy both Freddie and Thomas so I was prepared for that definition to stretch to 'any'. I had to admit I was shocked when the guy actually showed up. I had been expecting some kind of tall muscular surfing hunk, all confident charm and swagger, but the reality was quite different. Not that I'm any kind of expert, but he looked pretty damn average to me, nothing to mark him out from a hundred other blokes you would pass on the street without noticing. Which would have been fine if he'd had some kind of charm, or striking personality, some kind of spark that made you want to be around him. But actually I found him rather slimy, and watching Katie fussing about trying to impress him made me feel quite uneasy. He was a serious downgrade from Freddie, and about a thousand miles away from Effy. His eyes seldom left her tits, and though I know she likes to show them off, even Katie has to get tired off that. He was taking the fucking bait though, promising her that on his next visit he'd make her his last port of call so they could go for a drink together. When he gave her a kiss on the cheek before he left, I had to fight the urge to wipe it clean for her.

"Well, what do you think?" she turned to me excitedly.

I hesitated for a moment, trying to find a non-hurtful way of telling her he was a smarmy wanker, but my face must have given me away as usual.

"What?" said Katie with a hint of aggression.

"Really?" I said incredulously. "Are you that fucking desperate?"

"I'm not desperate," she pouted.

"Then what are you doing dressing up in borrowed clothes, and trying to pretend you're something you're not?" I said. "Why are you laughing at his fucking inane humour and waggling your tits at him to try and prove you're the kind of girl a guy like that would want?"

Katie looked deflated.

"Isn't that what you do?" she said. "Isn't that what everyone does?"

"No," I said. "Can you imagine me trying to pass myself off as some kind of superfit action chick to impress Emily? I'd fall flat on my fucking face."

The image tickled Katie, and made her smile again.

"No way," she said. "You're such a total fucking dork."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," I said. "But she still loves me for it."

"She does," admitted Katie. "Even though you're not her 'type'."

"You deserve better, Katie," I said softly. "Really, you do."

"Well that's easy for you to say," said Katie, all her normal feistiness seeming to have deserted her. "You've already got an amazing, strong, passionate, intelligent, beautiful and sexy woman who's absolutely crazy about you just the way you are."

It seemed like a time to point out the obvious.

"So have you," I said.

Katie laughed her most genuine laugh of the day.

"You're not wrong," she smiled. "You know I think she's the only person who's ever really loved me like that. For the real me, with all my faults. Not that she wouldn't go crazy if I waggled my tits at her."

"I'm sure she would," I giggled.

"She totally thinks I'm hot," smirked Katie.

It was easy to see the pride and satisfaction she took from that. It had after all been one of the constants in her life over the past few years, despite the ups and downs of her affairs with her men. At the end of the day, whenever the latest disappointment was grasping at her soul, there was always someone there who thought she was profoundly beautiful. It was something she had come to take for granted, but something that might be even now be being ripped away from her. I remembered how quickly information travelled in this place where everybody knew each other's business, and suddenly was desperate for her not to hear about Cat in some vicious village rumour.

"So why the sudden concerned face?" asked Katie.

I looked up at her in alarm.

"What?" she laughed. "I couldn't read you any easier if you came with coloured diagrams and footnotes."

"There's something I have to tell you," I said. "And I know it's probably not my place to say, but I don't want you to hear it from anybody else."

"Spill it, Campbell," commanded Katie.

Thinking about Effy seemed to have reinvigorated her mood. I hated to be the one to spoil it for her again, but she had been so kind to me when I was upset over Emily I felt I owed her the truth.

"I think Effy might have slept with somebody else," I said.

Katie laughed nervously.

"No," she said. "She wouldn't."

"There was this girl in the pub last night, and she was definitely flirting with Effy," I said. "The pair of them left together, and when me and Ems went over this morning she was there on Effy's boat."

"Is she fit?" said Katie.

"Very," I admitted.

"Who is she?" asked Katie, suddenly very serious.

"An American. Over here on one of those find your British roots kind of deals. They went out to sea with Ems today, looking for some old wreck or something."

"I don't believe it," said Katie, shaking her head. "I mean yeah, she used to pull that kind of shit all the time the first time I rejected her. She even slept with Cook for fuck's sake. But not now. She promised me. She wouldn't break her promise."

"How much rejection can one person take?" I asked her. "You know how upset she gets when she sees you coming on to guys."

"You'll have to find out for me," said Katie decisively.

"Why can't you ask her yourself?" I protested.

"What, and look like a lame-assed saddo?" she said fiercely. "No, you have to do it."

"I don't even know Effy that well."

"Emily will find out, and you'll have to get it out of Emily," insisted Katie.

I felt myself shrivelling into acquiescence under the ferocity of her gaze, until we were interrupted by the arrival of a bunch of customers.

"I'll do my best," I muttered as I made a hasty exit.

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.

.

I was pleased upon getting back to the cottage to find Thomas Skyping with Pandora instead of getting any work done. It meant I could rib him about that instead of taking any flak for my own late appearance.

"You know we are going to have to pull ourselves together," he grinned. "These ladies are seriously beginning to distract us."

"Women, eh?" I shrugged, but he was, as usual, right.

It was actually a relief to clear my head of the wanton emotions that surrounded me, and immerse myself into some cold hard data. Science was so much cleaner than love, and a hell of a lot easier to understand. Lost in the tempest that was Emily, I had forgotten how much satisfaction and fulfilment I could get from analysing facts and drawing informed conclusions. Thomas and I worked easily alongside each other for the rest of the day, crunching numbers and comparing notes from JJ's lab reports, and smiling with satisfaction as we watched our model slowly starting to take shape. It was like watching our baby taking its first tentative steps, knowing that soon the little bastard would be running all over the house. I was a proud mother. The project was going to be good, me and Thommo were going to ace our degrees and then the world would be our oyster.

Of course all of this grand scientific ambition exploded into dust the second Emily Fitch showed up that evening. I only just had the forethought to press save before she whirled me round in my computer chair, sat straddling my lap and starting kissing the fucking life out of me. These were not the sweet gentle kisses of the morning. These were dirty hungry kisses that were demanding I give my body to her, and that I bloody well better do it now. Thomas had gone to the kitchen to make us all some tea, but by the time he got back with the steaming mugs, Emily had dragged me up the stairs and thrown me on the bed. I began to wonder if scuba diving always made her this horny, because if it did, I hoped it took them a fucking long time to find Cat's granddaddy's boat.

Emily's hands and lips were all over me as she tugged unceremoniously at our clothing. Even as I wondered what had prompted this urgency, I felt my body responding to her zealous attentions. Her eyes were full of love, but her breathing was already ragged as she paid full attention to every newly exposed piece of flesh. She pushed my t-shirt up and raked her fingers across my stomach, leaning down and sticking her tongue into my belly button. Still straddling me, she pulled me up to sitting and dragged my top over my head, following through by pushing me back down into the bed with hot and glorious kisses that trailed down my neck and collar bone, before finally settling at the curves at the top of my breasts. Waywardly tossing aside pieces of her own attire in between, she then undid the zip of my jeans. I arched my hips up towards her, watching her eyes darken as she caught the scent of my desire before pulling the trousers down my legs and off. She removed my socks and nibbled at the bone of my ankle, as her right hand stroked its way smoothly back up towards my thigh. She started kissing her way back up, stopping to pay some very distracting attention to my knees, but she didn't linger there. Emily was in no mood to tease today. She wanted to make me feel good, but it was clear she had her goal fixed firmly in her sights. She rolled away from me briefly to discard her skirt, leaving us both just in our underwear, and then virtually sprang back up to seek out my mouth with hers, one hand grabbing into my hair whilst her other closed firmly around my breast as she pushed her tongue deep into my mouth.

My whole body shuddered beneath her as my own need and urgency started to match her own. My legs spread open beneath her without any conscious involvement from my brain, and she took full advantage, thrusting her thigh down against my clit and causing me to cry out as the friction carried through my wet knickers.

"You're wet," she said huskily, her hot breath practically burning in my ear.

"Can you blame me?" I said, as she dragged her thigh across my highly sensitised clit once more.

"I fucking love it when you're wet for me," she said, and my hands shot up behind her back, grabbing desperately at the clasp of her bra.

"You want me naked baby?" she grinned wickedly.

I gave her no answer as my entire focus was on ridding her of the offending article, and closing my mouth around the tantalising flesh of her beautiful bare tits.

"Oh fuck," she hissed when I tugged at her nipple with my teeth.

She grabbed my wrists and forced my hands down to my sides and trapped them there. She pushed her tit down towards my face and I kissed and licked and bit at her anyway I could as she deliberately restricted my movement. She adjusted her position till she could grinding rhythmically against me whilst pinning me down and letting me take each breast in turn into my oh so willing mouth.

"Oh God, I want you," I cried as she pulled my feast away from me.

"Trust me, Naomi honey," she growled as she looked down at me. "You are going to get me."

I was wearing an elasticated crop top, and she relinquished her grip on my wrists to pull it roughly over my head. Before I had the chance to reach for her, she was pinning me down again, her mouth closing around my rock hard nipple as she once again adjusted her position to keep her gorgeous molten pressure against me with her thigh. Her tongue began flicking expertly across my nipple making me moan and arch my back towards her, which in turn intensified the movement between my legs. I picked my head back up from where I'd thrown it wantonly back into the pillow, and caught her watching me for my reaction to each of her moves. Emily knew exactly what she was doing, and she knew what it was doing to me. I desperately wanted her inside of me, and I'm guessing she knew that too.

"Darling, something's coming between us," she said. "And I can't allow that to happen."

Quick as a flash she knelt up on the bed and wriggled out of her pants, before gazing greedily down at mine. I lay breathlessly on top of the duvet, letting her look. I wanted her to own me with that look. And I sure as fuck wanted to know what she was going to do next.

She plunged her head down to where the flimsy fabric met my skin, and in one smooth unbroken move she licked her way up across my belly, between my tits, out to my shoulder and up my neck, then pushed her full weight down onto me as she took me into another deliberately invasive kiss. My body reacted with a massive spasm, and I clutched at her back, but soon she was on the move again. She travelled back down my torso covering me with kisses as she went, forcing me to moan and grab twisted handfuls of bedding at her every touch. I was so hot for her she had me dangling at the very edge of control. This time when she reached my knickers, she carried on down, taking them with her and exposing the last of me to her proprietary glare.

"You are the most beautiful thing I've ever fucking seen," she told me as she crawled back up my body. I couldn't help but close my eyes and fling my limbs asunder, waiting for her to take her prize.

My eyes shot open again when I felt her enter me and I heard the colourful batch of profanities coming from her lovely mouth as she pushed into me with short hard thrusts. Control became a thing of the past, and I listened to my own unbridled cries fall ringing round my ears. She felt so fucking good inside me, and my mind drifted back to my own words from this morning. I have nothing to compare this to. This was not like any other sex I had encountered. Nothing else had ever felt this dirty, yet at the same time nothing else had felt this true. It was impossible for me to withhold any part of myself from her, and I couldn't understand how this meeting of flesh had suddenly become so important to me. But I couldn't give a fuck for any reasons right then. I needed her so badly it was beyond my capabilities to question why. I tilted my pelvis and pushed myself up against her, spreading my legs as wide as I could to give her greater leverage and encourage her to up her pace. Emily read me perfectly and started driving into me faster with those same short powerful thrusts, with her other arm wrapped tight around my back, pulling my tits to where she could consume them. She was driving me fucking crazy, and soon the two of us began to move even faster. Both of us were sweating and breathing heavily between releasing groans of delight as I felt myself building up to release. Emily didn't look at me, but her eyes were focussed and I could tell she was putting every thing she had into working my body for maximum pleasure. I could feel the tension in her muscles, and the thought of all that gorgeous strength being harnessed just for me caused great raking spasms to start flowing through my abdomen. She was riding one of my legs as she fucked me, and I realised she was close to orgasm too. I yelled her name and felt a thundering release take over the whole of me. I could hear the sound of her coming with me, and the whole of my perception became nothing more than me and my lover writhing against each other as we screamed out the final throes of our abandon.

I felt like I was coming out of some kind of coma, as I slowly regained my senses what could have been several minutes afterwards. I could still feel Emily inside me, the weight of her spread across me as her head and shoulders lay collapsed across my chest. The next few minutes remained wordless as well, as we breathed through the tremors of our aftershocks. It was beautiful. It was peaceful and fresh, like the morning after a violent storm. It was perfect.

I could have just left it there. I could have not rocked the boat. But I'm a scientist. It's my job to ask questions.

"So what was all that about?" I asked her.

The same question from her had prompted my confession of my jealously and my love just a few short days ago, but it triggered no such response in Emily.

"Can we not talk about it right now?" she said. "Can we just have this moment for a bit?"

"Ok," I said quietly, and we spent another while simply lying together, idly stroking each other and remembering the astonishing pleasure we had just shared.

"So," I said, after what I judged to be an appropriate amount of time. "How was your day?"

It might have seemed a bright and innocent question, the kind of question couples across the land would ask each other when they met again after a day at work, but it was loaded. I had begun to know my Emily now, and I knew that something fundamental had changed in her world today. She didn't answer me, and started trying to kiss me again, but I pushed her away. We had shared too much beautiful communication today for me to accept the 'don't worry your pretty little head about it' approach.

"So is this going to be us then?" I said. "You trying to distract me with sex every time I ask too awkward a question?"

Emily pushed out a long breath. I had her made, and she knew it. She raised her head back up and looked me in the eye.

"I have so much that I want to tell you," she admitted. "But I still need to work some things out for myself. This is not me saying no or pushing you away. And to be honest I can't think of anything worse than losing you, so if you think you need to demand those answers then I wouldn't really have a choice, but…"

"Then it's ok," I soothed her. "I don't need to force you to make that choice. Take whatever time you need. I'll wait for you."

I felt a sudden kinship with Effy in that moment. The Fitch sisters were complicated creatures, and they were both stringing us along for different reasons, but at the end of the day what else could we do but wait? They were worth it a thousand times over.

"Are you sure?" asked Emily, a hint of moisture beginning to gather in her eyes.

"Yes," I said with absolute conviction. "I trust you."

I smiled because for the first time in my life I had dropped my defences completely and let another person in. And it felt good.


	18. The Rapture Of The Deep

**So today I would like to pass on SJ's thanks for all your positive vibes and healing energies. She said it's no wonder she got better with all your lovely thoughts. And thanks from me too, it's great to have her back.**

**And the marvellous CatAttack is out breathing fresh air and running round like a mad thing rediscovering the world anew. So I'm just going to go ahead and dedicate this chapter to her lovely girlfriend who had to cope with her nearly dying (a lot), but who had the strength and the love to stand by her through all her traumas. They are my real life OTP ship and I wish them joy.**

**For those of you who enjoy a sneaky Buffy reference, there's one in here.**

**I don't own Skins, but I'd probably tell it everything…**

18. The Rapture Of The Deep

Emily

The deeper you dive, the bluer it gets. Water is not like air. Up there in the air our entire spectrum of visible light is free to bounce around as it pleases until it encounters an opaque material. Or a refractive one. You see, water absorbs light, but it doesn't do it all at once. It's why we see rainbows when the sunlight hits the rain. And it's why the quality of the light starts to change the deeper we descend into the ocean. It's the reds and the oranges that are the first to go, their longer wavelengths snatched away from the eye within the first six metres. Then it's the yellows, petering out at about fifty metres. Green and violet disappear just over a hundred meters down, and then there's nothing left but blue. Out in the deep ocean there's a fish that lives in the blue zone whose only predator comes from the even darker depths below. But evolution has come up with a cunning camoflage. The underbelly of this fish has developed to be the exact same shade of blue as the light that filters down to those deep depths. From above and from the sides the fish can be seen by its species mates and other creatures. But from below, where danger is most prevalent, it becomes invisible.

One day, I'd love to go down that deep to see that perfect blue. And deeper still, to where the light doesn't penetrate at all, but where the miracle of life still manages to manifest itself in the harshest of environments, and where the population are strange ghost like creatures whose only light is generated by their own bioluminescence. A truly alien environment where the only way humans can survive the pressure is to encase ourselves in bubbles of thick steel and glass.

Of course at the depths we are diving at now, we still have half our spectrum left, but the world that we are floating through is dominated by green and blue, a constant reminder that we are, quite literally, out of our depth. I love diving, and I'm not even trying to be conceited when I say I'm very good at it, but every time I come down here there's a little part of my heart that stays blue. I can't help but wonder what it must be like to be down here without being tanked up. Freediving can give you some of that experience, but it's fleeting. There is only so long you can manage without the burning need for air. In those drunken 'what would you want your superpower to be?' conversations, most people go for flying or superstrength, except Cook who wants x-ray vision so he can see women's bodies through their clothes. But I always want the ability to breathe underwater, so I could be down here without tanks and tubes and regulators and gas mixtures. So I could be down here and be free.

I feel a touch on my arm and turn to see Cat signalling to me asking if I'm ok. I signal back to say that I'm fine and attempt to focus. I've been getting distracted, and that's never a good thing on a dive. I exhale through my nose a couple of times to equalise the pressure in my mask and give myself a mental once over. We're just over twenty metres down, and I've never had any trouble with narcosis at this depth but you can never be too careful. Nitrogen narcosis is a result of a chemical imbalance when breathing under increased pressures. It can hit you without warning and it's like a belt of laughing gas. You can start to feel drunk or high even without realising it, losing focus and concentration and leaving yourself open to mistakes. The truth of the matter is, I am distracted. There's an awful lot of stuff spinning round in my head at the moment and it's leaking into the important parts of my brain even when I need them firing on all cylinders to operate properly down here. But Cat is a good buddy, and she checks in with me again just to make sure.

I still haven't given her my answer about the pipeline yet, and that's part of what is driving me to distraction, but she's being cool about it. We're doing dives together to set up the façade of our alibi of looking for her great granddaddy's boat, just in case my answer is yes. Today I have taken her to explore the wreck of a world war two German battleship that lost its way in a storm and perished on the rocks on a dark Welsh night. It's a fascinating dive to see real history preserved in this deep quiet resting place, but at the same time to witness how the environment has changed it, how undersea life has taken hold of the remains and claimed it as a new home. You can still see the guns, the galleys, iron chairs and tables, quite distinct in form but now covered with barnacles and sea plants, the once shining metal absorbed into the greenish blue hue of everything that surrounds it.

I've been here a few times, and there is always something new to discover, but today it cannot hold my attention. Part of the reason I love diving is that when I'm down here, I can forget about everything else and just live in the moment. Here, where every breath becomes a conscious decision, there is nothing but the ocean and your buddy and this tiny portion of time, with only the fish to share it with you. But today, surface issues keep intruding and making me lose my equilibrium, and it all comes back to the pipeline. And to Naomi.

She is the reason I can't give Cat an answer. Because I can't make up my mind. I don't think that choice is mine alone to make now. I feel that I need to include Naomi in the decision. I need to know what she thinks before I can commit myself. But to include her in the decision I have to tell her everything and that compromises her, and I don't want to put her at risk. I suppose the easy thing would just be to say no and to keep the status quo, but my conscience keeps picking at me. I know we have the chance to do something important, something that will make a real difference, and am I just being a coward if I choose to ignore it just so I can live my fairly tale life with my girlfriend? Naomi herself said that taking a stand was important, and that sometimes doing illegal stuff is what it takes. She was nothing but enthusiastic in her praise for the methods and actions of the Sea Ninjas. Am I being patronising in wanting to protect her? She is passionate about ocean conservation after all. Surely my willingness to see a future with her is partially based on her sharing my beliefs. But do I have the right to impose my lifestyle choices on her by telling her things she might not want to know?

These and a dozen other questions spin round and round in my brain, and I can feel myself start to get giddy. Jesus, maybe I'm getting narced after all. I spin myself round in the water looking for Cat and see her just a few metres away, floating behind a massive anti-aircraft gun and clearly imagining she's firing it. I swim over to her and point my thumb towards the surface, telling her that I want to get out of there. She checks again to see if I'm ok, and I rock my outstretched hand, telling her I'm not great but that it's not an emergency. She flashes me an ok signal to let me know she has understood, and we start to make our way back to the surface. I've never felt this weird under the water before, and to be honest it's freaking me out a little, but I know that the worst thing I can do is start to panic. This is not a place to lose it, and so I push everything that's been troubling me to the back of my mind and concentrate solely on the here and now and the task of making a controlled and rational ascent.

About halfway up, Cat makes me take a safety stop. It's probably not strictly necessary, but as I can't actually tell her what's wrong with me she's taking no chances, and giving our bodies the chance to readjust to the change in pressure in a leisurely fashion. Even at this higher depth our colourscape remains altered, but I can see shafts of sunlight streaming in from above. Sometimes the ascent is the most beautiful part of the dive, looking up towards the sun glancing off surface of the water and feeling the transition between worlds. Today is one of those days and I find myself holding Cat's hand as I catch the shadow of the hull of Effy's boat. We watch the mesmerising motion of the swell above us and the shifting patterns of the light, and I am as entranced as the night I overdid it on MDMA in a dodgy gay club in Swansea and watched a multi-pattern green laser for the best part of an hour. Eventually Cat decides I am good to go and we swim on upwards hand in hand.

I breach into the dazzling complexity of full spectrum light, spitting out my regulator and ripping off my mask as I take great gasps of regular air, blinking at the brightness of the sun.

.

.

.

"Morning sunshine," said Effy as my eyes flickered open.

"What? Is it? What?" I said in alarm.

"Is it what?" said Effy calmly.

"Morning?" I said, staring around wildly and realising I was lying on a sun lounger on the front deck of the Catherine the Great. "I don't remember it being night."

"Figure of speech," said Effy, frowning. "You've just been dozing for about ten minutes."

"Oh," I muttered, looking down at my body.

I was still wearing my fucking wetsuit for Christ's sake.

"You said you were knackered and just wanted a sit down," said Effy. "Next thing I knew, you were out. What happened down there?"

"I just started to space out," I told her. "I think I got narced."

"What? You? The Queen of the Deep?" she replied, raising an incredulous eyebrow. "I'm jealous."

Only Effy could be jealous of a potentially life-threatening intoxication, but then again she had made it her ambition to experience every high possible so no wonder she wanted to subject herself to 'the rapture of the deep'.

"It can happen to anyone," said Cat, appearing round the corner with mugs of tea. "Even in conditions you're completely familiar with."

"Luckily there are no lasting side effects," laughed Effy. "Unlike some of the other things we do. Remember that time we went to Waveform and you got so munted you couldn't walk, and I had to borrow a wheelbarrow off that guy who was selling tequila so I could get you back to the tent?"

"Yeah, well I don't think Cat needs to hear about that," I said in embarrassment."

"How are you feeling?" asked Cat.

"I'll be fine now," I said. "I've got tea."

"Ah yes, the English answer to all evils," she laughed.

Two cups of tea and an enormous sandwich made with half the contents of Effy's fridge later I was feeling much better. But as I watched my two friends chatting idly in the gorgeous evening sunlight, I knew that the problems that had followed me down into the deep were even more pertinent up here, and a return to land would only exacerbate them further. I couldn't take this simmering confusion for much longer. I had to sort my shit out.

"You wanna talk about it?" said Effy, sitting down beside me.

Sometimes having an extra perceptive best friend was a definite bonus. There would be no hiding from her.

"It's Naomi," I admitted.

"What's up?" asked Effy. "I thought you two were love's young dream."

"We are," I said. "I mean she's amazing, and I'm completely fucking in love with her, and I know she feels the same way about me."

"But?" prompted Effy.

I looked over at Cat, feeling comforted by her relaxed and confident presence. She looked completely at ease with who she was and what she was doing.

"Is your girlfriend a Ninja?" I asked her.

"No," she laughed. "But she can move like one."

"Huh?" I frowned.

"She's a dancer," explained Cat.

"Does she know you're here?" I said.

"Yes," she replied.

"And why?"

"Yes."

"And she's cool with that?"

"She loves me for who I am," replied Cat. "And being an activist is part of that. I'm also a dog lover, a softball player and I like ridiculous action movies. She just likes the whole package."

"I want to talk to Naomi about the pipeline," I said. "I just don't think I can honestly decide what to do without asking her what she thinks."

"So ask her," said Cat.

"Just like that?" I said. "But that would mean exposing her. Just asking her would mean admitting what we've done."

"She already knows exactly what we've done," said Effy.

"You don't have to give her all the details," suggested Cat. "That way you can limit the damage. My girlfriend knows what I do. She doesn't know exactly when or where or with who, and that way she can't give me away."

"But I want to," I admitted. "I want to tell her everything. I don't want us to have any fucking secrets anymore."

"Then I think you've got your answer there, Emily," said Cat. "You obviously feel that you can trust her, and that she deserves the truth."

"What would you do, Effy?" I said.

"I don't have a girlfriend," she said flatly.

"What would you tell Katie?" I asked, refusing to be stumped on a technicality.

"I'd tell her everything she wanted to know," she replied without hesitation.

You have to love that about Effy. She may be love's bitch, but at least she's man enough to admit it.

"Even though she can't keep her mouth shut?" I questioned. "Wouldn't you be worried she would let something slip in the wrong circumstances?"

"I said I'd tell her everything she _wanted_ to know," said Effy. "Katie wouldn't want to know anything she couldn't handle."

"I guess what it comes down to is that every situation is different," said Cat. "And I think you should tell Naomi, because _you_ think her opinion is important. Because you want to share everything about yourself with her. Because you respect her, and you want your relationship to function with that deep level of trust. We all trust our partners, it's just that trust shows itself to us in different ways."

"I don't have a partner," muttered Effy darkly.

"Oh really?" smirked Cat. "Then why does your not girlfriend look at me like she wants to rip my face off with her bare hands? Have you even told her that we're not sleeping together?"

"We haven't really chatted lately," mumbled Effy barely audibly.

"Don't tell me you're doing the whole trying to make her jealous thing," said Cat, her eyes shining with amusement. "That's school girl stuff, Effy. You are seriously whipped, girlfriend."

I had to laugh at the sight of the mighty Effy Stonem being called out on her obsession.

"Yeah well, I'm not the fucking only one," she glared at me.

"Guilty as charged," I admitted freely. "My beautiful blonde geek owns my heart, every bit as much as Katie owns yours."

"Wow," said Effy in genuine appreciation. "Then I guess you better tell her everything she wants to know."

"It's Naomi," I stated. "She's going to want to know everything."

"Then I guess you better tell her everything," said Effy.


	19. For Your Eyes Only

**Warning – this episode contains strong language, drug use, and scenes of a sexual nature. Fairly average chapter then ;-)**

**.**

**.**

19. For Your Eyes Only

Naomi

Another day, another glorious awakening chez Fitch. Emily's room gets the sunlight in the morning, and the room was filled with a beautiful golden glow. She never closes her curtains, says she needs to feel connected to the natural cycles of the day even when she's asleep, and it's not like there's any close neighbours or passers by to peer in on us. It used to freak me out at first, being used to having my curtains shut tight as a defence against the world until my alarm clock snapped me awake at the last possible moment. But that was before I discovered the untold pleasures of gently seeping back to consciousness in the company one of Ms. Emily Fitch. Some days she's there first, and I get to wake up to the sight of her beautiful face smiling at me, or the feel of her fingers dancing lightly across my skin. Other days I get to watch her sleeping, her radiant red hair shining in the morning light, and I take dozens more mental photographs for my already enormous memory file marked 'Emily looking gorgeous'. Other days I will wake to discover her tiny form tangled lazily around mine, and my 100 mile an hour brain will decide to take a hike and allow me to bask uninterrupted in the simple delight of holding the woman I love.

I know that I am changing. This woman and this place are reaching into me and altering the way I operate on a very basic level. And I think it's for the better. I feel happier, and not just cause I'm getting awesome sex on a regular basis. Sometimes I feel like I was only half the person I could be before I got here. It's like Emily has somehow opened my eyes to the beauty of the world as well as its horrors. I'm definitely a lot less angry. She has shown me that passion doesn't have to be a burden, that caring doesn't have to lead to despair. I used to moan a lot about the state of the world, but my moaning wasn't exactly getting me anywhere. Of course I still care about corruption, injustice and the environment, but I don't let it depress me any more. Emily has shown me that if we want to change the world, we have to become the kind of people we would want to live in that world, so others might be more inclined to follow us. We are all a part of the future, and it becomes what we choose to make it.

Being out at sea all the time had definitely had an effect. I have grown to love it so much, I am starting to wonder how I'll cope being stuck in a building most days when I go back to university. But then that thought always leads on to the far more devastating question of how the fuck am I going to cope without Emily? That morning I glossed over it the same way I glossed over it every time it raised its ugly head. I didn't want to think about it. It was just too horrible to contemplate. We had gotten in so deep so quickly, and she seemed so much a part of me now that the idea of separation appalled me. I know she said she wanted a future together, but would we really be able to sustain a long distance relationship when we'd had such an intense beginning?

I was grateful for the distraction when I felt Emily stirring.

"Hey beautiful," came her voice from beside me.

It was her morning voice, the sleepy one with even more of that wonderful husk in it, and it was too beautiful to ignore. I rolled my head to face her and in an instant my whole world was pain. A mighty stabbing pain shot through my skull, as though Katie had just rammed a stiletto through my temple in a fit of temper.

"Fucking Christ!" I exclaimed, desperately trying to blink the pain away.

"Feeling a little worse for wear are we?" smirked Emily.

I couldn't even respond to her teasing, as the throbbing in my head was joined by a sensation of nausea, and the general feeling that every cell in my body had somehow been poisoned. Which of course they had been, but I had done it to myself. Emily's smirk dissolved into a tender face of concern.

"Are you alright, hun?" she asked me. "Do you need me to get you a bucket?"

Oh, if only it was that simple that I could just throw up and start to feel better, but I had the feeling that this hangover was going to haunt me throughout the rest of the day. I reached out for Emily and clung onto her weakly. At least if I was going to die, I could die in the heaven of her arms.

"How much did you have to drink last night?" said Emily softly.

I could only force out one word. The one word that I knew would explain it all.

"Cook," I mumbled into her chest.

"Ah, that explains it all," said Emily, proving my point.

I had found myself at a loose end the night before. Thomas had cried off for a couple of days after practically begging me to let him got to Bristol so he could see Pandora. Effy and Emily were still out at sea diving with Cat and I had pretty much done with work. I could have stayed in and done some reading or maybe dicked about on the internet, but I was missing my girl and I wanted the comfort of human company. I had contemplated going to see Katie, but as I hadn't yet succeeded in my mission to determine whether Effy and Cat were an item, I thought better of it. So I found myself wandering out to the pub to see who was around. One of the advantages of being in such a small place was that there was always bound to be somebody you knew. I had barely gotten in through the door before I heard Cook's astonishingly loud voice booming out across the room at me.

"Naomi Campbell, come and sit your arse down over here immediately," he shouted, before yelling over to the bar. "Freds, get Naomi a pint, man."

A free pint seemed like too good an offer to refuse, so I wandered over. Cook was patting the seat beside him.

"You are just the person I want to see," he grinned.

"Why's that then?" I said suspiciously.

"I need you," he replied.

"Cook, we've been through this," I sighed. "I'm still gay, and I'm still in love with Emily."

"I'm not after your body tonight," he laughed.

"What makes tonight so special?" I said sarcastically.

"It's quiz night," he said. "And I need you for your brain. You are the vital ingredient I need to complete my dream team. You're going to be my secret weapon that nets us the jackpot."

"The jackpot?"

"Yeah," said Freddie, returning with the drinks. "You see as well as the regular prize where you win pints and stuff, there's this cash jackpot that you only win if your team gets over 35 points. If no-one wins it, it gets rolled forward to the next week."

"And no-one's won it for weeks," added Cook with a glint in his eye. "It's currently standing at two hundred and fifty quid. Which is where you come in. We've got to get our hands on that cash before some fancy bunch of tourists comes in one night and nicks it off us."

"Which is where you come in," said Freddie. "Cause we've got some serious gaps in our knowledge base. I've got music covered, and Cook is great with sport."

"And Julie," said Cook, gesturing to a mousy looking girl who looked like she didn't get out much. " Has an encyclopaedic knowledge of soaps and all that X-Factor shit."

"The X-Factor's not shit," mumbled Julie.

In another display of how my personality has eased over these past few weeks, I refrained from jumping down the poor girl's throat with my opinions of the said appalling televisual spectacle, and instead turned back to Cook.

"So what do you need me for?" I asked him.

"We need someone for the nerdy shit," replied Cook.

"Oh great," I said, going to stand up until Freddie put his hand on my arm to stop me.

"He means for the clever stuff," said Freds. "He's just too dumb to say it like that."

"Can't you just Google shit?" I huffed.

"That's the thing," shrugged Cook. "I am dumb, and everyone knows it. So if I suddenly start coming out with clever answers, everyone's going to know that we are cheating. And that, my friend, is frowned upon. But you, you know, you're actually clever. You actually know stuff."

"What the hell," I shrugged, sitting back down again. "I'll be your brainy nerd."

"Fucking mint, Blondie," yelled Cook, high fiving Freddie before giving some neighbouring tables the evil eye.

"Your going down motherfuckers," he taunted. "You're going down."

The quiz turned out to be quite good fun, and got more fun as Cook kept feeding me more pints. Of course there were quite a lot of questions I didn't have a clue about, but the others seemed fairly confident about their answers. Cook's dream team, who he'd adventurously named 'Cookie Monster's Dream Team' were fairly good at coming up with the goods, but every time there was a question that stumped them they turned to me with expectant looks on their faces. I had to admit I was feeling quite smug every time I could drag out an answer from the back of my brain, and whisper it to my teammates, especially when I could hear groans coming from the neighbouring tables as they took fervent guesses at things I was absolutely certain of. I was fairly sure I was going to have a bruise the next morning from the number of times Cook punched me in the arm and shouted 'Nice one, Blondie' in delight.

Eventually it was time to swop papers and mark up a neighbouring team's score. Freddie grinned goofily and Cook howled with delight every time we got an answer right, which was a lot. I felt relaxed and happy in their easy company, and even Julie seemed to be coming out of her shell.

"We're gonna fucking ace this," grinned Freddie, when the time came to hand the papers back in.

"We've certainly beaten this bunch of bozos," laughed Cook, waving the crumpled sheet in his hand at 'Jonno's Boyos' at the next table.

On his way back he got yet another round of drinks in and we waited in giddy drunken anticipation for the results. The quizmaster, an enormous fat guy known as Mad Mike, stepped back up to the microphone.

"In third place with thirty-two points we have 'The Dirty Stopouts'," he said, raising a cheer from a group on the other side of the room.

"In second place with thirty-four points, and just missing out on the jackpot we have 'The Bling Bling Bitches'."

This announcement was greeted with loud shrieking from a table full of women.

"This is it people," said Cook, as Mad Mike paused for dramatic effect. "Prepare yourselves for victory."

I was more preparing myself for the spectacle Cook was going to make of himself if we did actually win, but I smiled back at him.

"Right there with ya, Captain Cook," I slurred, punching him back on the arm as hard as I could. He barely even flinched.

"But this week's winners," said Mike dramatically. "With a massive thirty-seven points, nabbing both top prize and the fabulous rollover jackpot are Cookie Monster's Dream Team."

A mixture of cheers and jeers rang out across the pub as Cook leapt from his chair and pumped his fists in the air. He danced across the pub loudly singing 'Championes, Championes' and ribbing the defeated teams around him.

"He really is a cock, isn't he?" I laughed at Freddie.

"Yeah, but he's cute with it," blurted Julie.

It was the loudest I had heard her all evening, and I raised a quizzical eyebrow at her forcing her face to fill with a deep crimson blush. When Cook returned to the table via a trip to the toilet, he seemed even more excitable than usual and dumped a wad of twenty pound notes in the middle of the table.

"So what are you going to spend your winnings on?" I asked him.

"TEQUIIILAAAAA!" he howled, shoving a note into Freddie's hand and ordering him to the bar.

"A sound investment," I giggled at him.

"Couldn't have done it without ya, Naomikins," he said, reaching out his hand for me to shake. "And now that I don't need your brain to be coherent any more, I'm gonna help you destroy it. Knock yourself out, babe. It's Effy's finest."

I felt him press something into my hand as he shook it, and as I closed my fist around the small packet, I didn't need to be a brainy nerd to work out that it was drugs of some kind. I smirked back at Cook, and wandered off to the toilets. It wasn't until I had locked the toilet door behind me that I opened my hand to discover what I was letting myself in for. I held the little plastic baggy up to the light. Cocaine. What the hell, I thought. I was already shitfaced and I was in the mood to party. I racked out a regular sized line on the top of the cistern, but had just enough of my wits about me to think twice. Effy's finest, the words came tumbling back through my brain. Every drug I had had since I'd come here had been seriously hardcore strength, and they had to be coming from somewhere. It seemed that my theories about Effy being a smuggler were proving to be correct. I cut the line in half, and then rolled up a tenner to take just that portion of it. The hit was almost instantaneous, and powerful as fuck. I leant back against the wall of the cubicle and let the rush come.

"Damn," I whispered to myself, as a feeling of euphoria and invincibility overtook me. This had to be the best coke I had ever had in my life. My brain was screaming in delight at the artificially induced sensations, and I couldn't help but laugh at the thought that some of my old buddies back in Bristol would kill for something this good. I eyed up the second half of the line lying temptingly along the porcelain. I could have just scooped most of it back into the bag, but Cook had released the devil in me. I've probably had better ideas in my time, but I re-rolled my tenner, and hoovered up the rest of the powder.

.

.

.

As lay there with Emily soothingly stroking my back I tried to piece together the subsequent events, but the rest of the night remained only in fragments, and those fragments only in pictures. The crack of glass on wood as we slammed down our shot glasses after yet another round of tequila. Cook jumping round in the car park with his top off demanding that someone take him to a party. Doing lines off Julie's make up mirror on the roundabout in the kiddie park. The four of us dancing round the duck pond in the middle of the village. The grin on Cook's face as he fondled Julie's tits up against the bus stop. Me sitting cross-legged in the middle of the road as if I was in a protest shouting 'Want Emleee'. Freddie giving me a piggy back down the lanes. Lying in a bush in the Fitches front garden whilst Freddie threw stones at the window. The delight on Katie's face when she opened the door to Freddie, only to be replaced with disappointment seconds later when she realised he was after Emily. The way Emily laughed when Freddie announced he had a present for her. Emily holding me upright under the shower in the wet room. And finally, falling into the soft welcoming paradise that was our bed.

"Good night then?" asked Emily, after a few more of my most pathetic moans and groans.

"We won the quiz," I muttered weakly.

"I can see how that would lead to total annihilation," nodded Emily sagely.

"Stop taking the piss," I pouted at her. "If somebody hadn't been out at sea so long, I'd have probably had a nice quiet evening in doing shagging."

"Yes, I can see how this is all my fault," said Emily deadpan. "I'm so very very sorry. I'll stop going out to work and become your little wifey instead shall I?"

"You have no compassion," I told her.

"None whatsoever," she laughed. "Now come on, it's time to drag your sorry arse out of bed."

"Noooooo," I whined as she pulled herself away from me. "I need to stay in bed so you can nurse me with cold flannels and cups of tea."

"Lovely as that sounds," said Emily, pulling on some clothing. "I've got plans."

"Don't leave me," I frowned.

"I'm not leaving you," she replied, pulling back the covers and running an appreciative eye over my stricken form. "I'm taking you with me."

"Where?" I said grouchily. "And you just perved on a dying woman. You're evil."

"I think you'll live," said Emily, sitting back down next to me and stroking my hair. "I wanted to show you one of my special places."

"Can't we go later?"

She leaned down and kissed me on the cheek.

"No darling," she said softly. "The weather's going to be shitty all next week, and we have to catch the tide."

Emily did bring me breakfast in bed, but after that no amount of pleading and cajoling would persuade her to allow me to stay there. She was kind, but she was firm and she definitely looked like a woman on a mission. And as sorry for myself as I was feeling, there was no way I could actually refuse my little red princess anything she wanted. So not long afterwards I found myself clinging to her waist as we sped along on her scooter to some unknown destination. I began to relax a little as I leant into her comforting back. It was actually a glorious day, and it wouldn't be so bad to ride around with my lover in the sunshine and have a lazy picnic in her special place. My sense of calm was rudely disrupted, however, when we pulled up outside a small brick building sporting the Fitchwater logo, and went inside. It was a boathouse, with a number of small craft in it, and my first feeling of alarm escalated into full-scale fear when Emily chucked the waterproof pack she was carrying into one of those inflatable dinghy things with an outboard.

"You cannot be serious," I said to her in horror. "You are not taking me out in that thing."

"It's perfectly safe," she smiled back at me. "And I'm an excellent driver."

"I've got the hangover from hell, and you want to take me out on the open sea in a glorified lilo?"

"You need to get your head underwater," she laughed at me.

"What?" I scoffed. "No way."

"Seriously," she replied. "Just jump in and get your whole head in the sea. It's the best hangover cure ever."

"NO," I said firmly.

"Would I lie to you?"

"You've been known to be economical with the truth," I challenged her. "And no. I'm not doing it."

"Your loss," shrugged Emily, jumping down into the dinghy.

"Can't we go on Effy's boat?" I suggested.

"Too big."

"Well what about one of those?" I said, pointing to an attractive and robust looking speedboat."

"Nah, I wouldn't want to take one of those that close to the rocks."

"There's going to be rocks?" I gulped, edging away from the tiny rubber deathtrap.

Emily sighed, and turned round to face me.

"Naomi, I really want you to come," she said earnestly. "It's kind of important to me."

I swear those eyes of hers should really be on some kind of register, because seconds after I stared into those soft, deep pools of endless warm and comforting brown, I had willingly thrown my life into her hands and followed her down into the inflatable. The smile that greeted my actions was enough to slice its way through my fear with one fell swoop. Who were you trying to fool, I asked myself. You would follow her to the ends of the earth. It didn't stop me from gripping tightly onto the ropes that ran along the sides of the boat, as Emily eased her out into the water. Luckily the sea was quite calm that day. Any rougher and I would have been puking my guts up over the side. Emily drove us for about half an hour across the bay, and then headed directly towards the tall dark rocky cliffs that rose out of the ocean. There didn't seem to be any clear destination, as the cliffs were sheer, and the sea was still deep below us, but Emily seemed to know exactly what she was doing. She steered us through two smaller rocks and the cliff face revealed it's hidden treasure. The rocks curved round to create a hidden pool of deep water, and at the back of the pool, there was a shelf in the cliff face. A perfect semi circle with a smooth flat bottom, that was a gorgeous concealed suntrap sitting just above the surface of the waves.

"It only reveals itself for a few hours at low tide," said Emily. "But I fucking love it here. I don't think anyone else in the whole world knows about it. Apart from you now. You can only see it if you come through those two rocks. I found it when I was swimming one day."

"You swim out here?" I said incredulously, beginning to wonder if Effy's fish gene theory was true.

"I generally start from the closer end of the bay, but yeah," she said, grabbing the waterproof pack and jumping in the water. "I swim like a fucking Fitch."

I looked at her in awe as she swam over and chucked the pack onto the shelf. As she turned back towards me I was hit by a sudden fit of madness. Despite still feeling pretty fucking sketchy, I stood up and flung myself head first over the side of the boat. The shock of the water slapped me into life, and when I righted myself and pushed my head back into the air, I felt as refreshed as people pretend to be on those zingy toothpaste adverts. I swam straight over to Emily and grabbed her into a kiss.

"What are you doing?" she laughed when I released her.

"Taking the plunge," I shouted in delight. "And it feels fucking awesome."

"Wow," said Emily. "But impressive as that is, I still need to secure the boat. Also, I'm pretty sure you've just fucked your phone."

My hand shot automatically to the pocket of my shorts, where I could feel the lump of what was my soon to be ex phone. I gave myself a mental head slap, and turned to watch Emily swimming strongly after the boat, which was drifting back out to sea after my reckless abandonment. She looked so fucking beautiful in the water that I suddenly didn't give a fuck about my redundant technology.

"You know what," I yelled after her. "I don't care. I don't fucking care."

"Well aren't you the wild woman of the ocean," she grinned back at me. "I like it."

My eyes stayed riveted to her as she found a place and tied up the boat. I felt like I was in a fucking movie or something, in this perfect place with this perfect fucking woman. I swam up behind her as she started to haul herself out of the water onto the shelf. My feet managed to find some purchase on a rock below and I pushed myself up until I was standing right behind her, half in and half out of the water. I pushed the strands of her wet hair aside, and started kissing the back of her neck.

"Well, hello my reckless beauty," she murmured. "You've certainly woken up a bit."

All she was wearing was a lycra rash vest and a pair of baggy surf shorts, but suddenly even that was too much for me. I wanted to kiss more skin. I pushed her top right up her back and over her head, covering her with random kisses as I went. I threw the top up onto the shelf and returned to my prize. Emily's beautiful back with its elegant musculature and tiny dancing fishes. She wrapped her arms around a rock and waited for me. I had spent enough hours worshipping her back for her to know exactly what I wanted. I scooped up two handfuls of seawater and let them fall down from her neck splashing against the tattoo and making her fish glisten as the sunlight hit the water. I started kissing her again, tasting the salt on her and praising every last one of her inky sea creatures with a kiss. My hands started to roam over the beautiful conundrum that was Emily's hard soft hard soft curves.

"Fuck," she hissed breathily, as the waves lapped gently against our barely entwined bodies.

My top and bra were the next things to go. I needed to feel my breasts pressing against my place of worship as I continued my devotions, tracing over her hallowed contours with my tongue. Emily's appreciative moans only served to excite me further, and my hands crept round her body so I could feel the perfection of her own breasts in my palms.

"I love you," I told her, as I kissed her over and over again. I would never grow tired of kissing her back like this, and I could feel my heart pounding in my chest as her breathing became more ragged. I slid both my hands down from her shoulders to her wrists as her powerful arms clung onto the rock, until I was wrapped around her with my face pressed into her neck and one of my thighs pushed between her own, and my lust became a raging bull. I let myself slide slowly down her back into the water, kissing my way down her spine as I went. I stopped for breath, and then slipped below the surface, pulling her shorts down so I could kiss the tail of the tiny fish that wriggled its way between her buttocks.

But still, it wasn't enough. I carried on down, pulling her shorts from her body until she was naked before me. As I came back up, I bent my legs and pushed against a ledge, hauling us both a little further out until we half stood, half lay against the slope that led up to the shelf with the water just reaching halfway up our thighs.

"Oh God," groaned Emily as my hands and lips began to travel across her flesh once more. I could feel her wonderful ass grinding back into me and I couldn't contain myself any more. I reached down and slipped my hand between her legs, my whole heart smiling as she gasped and parted them slightly to accommodate me.

"I want to touch you," I whispered in her ear as I stroked the insides of her thighs, my own pussy growing wet as I felt her spasm at my words.

"I want to feel you," moaned Emily, her body continuing to undulate against mine.

I found my own handhold in the rock, and kissed her between the shoulder blades as I moved the fingers of my other hand in search of her clit. I groaned against her skin as I discovered my destination, sliding my whole hand back and forth across her wet folds. She called out my name as I teased her clit, and nipped at the muscles on her back, and it pushed me into a sexual frenzy. This tasteful stroking wasn't enough. I wanted to take her like this. I wanted to fuck her up against this rock and hear her scream for more.

"I want you Emily," I said.

"I know," she replied huskily, curling herself back towards me.

It was all the encouragement I needed to push myself inside her pussy and start thrusting in and out of her. She felt fucking amazing, and I kissed her and fucked her as if my life depended on it. Maybe it did, cause I had never felt so alive as I did right then, staring in awe at my tattooed lover as the sun beat down on my back and the waves lapped around my legs, and she cried and gasped at every one of my thrusts.

"I love you, I love you," I cried as we moved in perfect accelerating symmetry.

"Fuck, you're so good," she cried out. "I'm gonna fucking…"

Her words died on her lips as I felt her come, her walls closing in on me as she screamed her way through the rush.

"I love you, I love you," I cried again. If I said it a thousand times, it still wouldn't be enough to express how I really felt about her.

With one last great cry Emily's body shuddered against mine, and she relaxed her grip on the rock, letting her full weight fall back onto me. I lost my footing and the pair of us fell back into the sea. I flailed around uselessly for a bit until I regained my equilibrium to discover Emily laughing at me. She swam up to me.

"You," she said, kissing me. "Are. Fucking. Amazing. You are the most amazing woman on earth. In fact, you're not even a woman. You're a goddess. In fact, you're what goddesses have as their goddess."

I grinned in smug satisfaction at her enthusiasm. Not just a geeky nerd then.

"Come on," she said, grabbing my hand and starting to swim. "I need to get up on that shelf."

"Let me guess," I teased her. "You're hungry, and you've got food in that back."

"What can I say?" she replied. "Sex makes me hungry, but mindblowingly spectacular sex makes me ravenous."

I picked at my lunch as I looked on in amusement at Emily devouring hers. I could hardly stomach my own food. My hangover sickness had been replaced by a different swirling nausea. I was so incredibly in love I was practically shaking from it. She finished her sandwich in record time, and then came over to cuddle into me. For ages we just sat there in contented silence, as I drank in the sheer beauty of our surroundings, the blue of the sea that contrasted with the black rocks that wrapped themselves around it to give us our own private lagoon. Emily was still naked, her natural outdoor girl tan protecting her from the sun, and her natural body confidence protecting her from any embarrassment. She had fished out suncream though, and made sure my pale city girl skin was covered in it.

"This place is fucking perfect," I said, eventually breaking the silence.

"I'm glad you like it," she smiled. "I wanted to take you somewhere special. And private."

I smirked back at her, but it was quickly wiped from my face when I saw the seriousness in her eyes.

"You know I love you too right?" she asked me.

"Oh God, there's a 'but' in there isn't there?" I said in panic. "As in I love you, but…?"

"No, there's no 'but'," she said urgently. "That I love you is an absolute. I have no doubts at all about that. I love you, Naomi Campbell. Which is why I have to talk to you. I have a dilemma, and I want your opinion and your advice, but to do that I have to let go of all my secrets."

"You can tell me anything," I assured her.

"Are you sure?" she asked me. "If I let you in, you'll be implicated in the things I've done."

"I'm sure," I said with conviction. "I can't think of anything I want more than to know you completely. I'll take my chances."

Emily took a deep breath in.

"Ok," she exhaled. "It was me and Effy that blew up that pipeline."

"I know," I replied.

"Well, now you've heard it officially. And yes, we are connected to the Sea Ninjas, but we operate as an independent group within that network, or at least we did."

"Did?"

"The pipeline thing was supposed to be it," said Emily. "You do your action. You move on. You don't get caught. You inspire others to take up the struggle. That's how it was supposed to be with us, until some hacker dude called Stingray discovered some evidence."

"Evidence of what?" I asked.

"That you were right all along. The pipeline contained a pipe within a pipe. They were going to use it for waste dumping, just like you suggested."

"Those fucking bastards," I growled. "So is this Stingray person going to go public?"

"Yeah, but it's only a paper trail, they want more solid evidence to back it up, which is why the Ninja's contacted us directly, even though that's against usual protocol."

"How did they contact you?" I asked.

"By flirting with Effy in the pub," laughed Emily.

"Cat?" I said incredulously. "Cat's a Ninja?"

"Yep," said Ems. "And she wants us to go back to the blast site, to get photographs, and if possible recover a piece of the pipe with a serial number that corresponds with Stingray's findings."

"Isn't that incredibly dangerous?"

"Yes it is," replied Emily flatly. "Dangerous and stupid. It dramatically increases our chances of getting caught."

"But you still want to do it?"

"I haven't said yes yet," said Emily. "I couldn't make up my mind without asking you. I don't want to take that risk without your approval. What happens to me affects you too now."

"So if I asked you not to, then you wouldn't do it?"

Emily shook her head.

"I love you too much," she said. "And lying to you would have killed me."

I looked across at my warrior sitting in front of me. As distracting as it was I loved the fact that she had chosen to have this conversation with me naked. It was as if she wanted to show me that she was prepared to reveal everything, to make herself completely vulnerable to me, and to trust that I would respect that. I was so happy that she had chosen to open up to me like this, that I was able to give her my answer with complete conviction.

"I think you should do it," I said. "I want you to do it. I believe in you, and I believe in what you stand for."

"What if I get caught?" she said.

"Then I'll visit you in jail," I said. "I'll stand by you. I'll wait for you. I'll file lawsuits in the courts of human rights that you were acting in the defence of humanity in the face of crimes against nature. I'll saturate the media and turn you and Effy into global environmental heroes."

"God, you would and all, wouldn't you?" she smiled, but with a hint of a tear in her eye.

"You can count on it," I promised her. "But in the far more likely eventuality that you carry out this daring raid without getting caught, I will keep my mouth shut and do anything I can to help you."

I closed the distance between us and captured her into an eloquent kiss with which I tried to show her just how much I meant it.

"Do that again," she said, the second I released her.

I complied with her request. Emily was my woman, and I would do anything for her.

"Do you know what those kisses do to me?" she asked me breathlessly on the next release.

"What do they do?" I whispered, staring into the eyes that had taken me prisoner.

Forty minutes later I was still staring into those eyes once she had shown me her answer. I lay with her in her secret hideaway, my senses blown away by the whole truth of her. I swear that there cannot be a more beautiful sight on this whole planet than a just fucked Emily Fitch staring back at you with complete love, trust and admiration. But the rest of the world will never know, cause this sight is for my eyes only.


	20. A Home For The Heart

**For Cat, who is heading to the ocean as we speak. And that makes me gloriously happy.**

**.**

**.**

20. A Home For The Heart

Emily

The next morning I awoke with a feeling of lightness running through my whole body. Naomi was still asleep, and I got up and padded over to the cottage window. Yesterday's wonderful sunshine had been replaced by gloomy clouds and an all-consuming hazy rain. Welcome back Welsh summer. I had a corporate team-bonding group in all this week. It was my least favourite type of work, because basically most of them were dicks and spent all of their time trying to outdo each other at the expense of actually learning anything. It was also a fairly safe bet that a fair proportion of them were going to try to hit on me.

But they paid well, and accounted for a good portion of Fitchwater's business, so I had to bite the bullet. Katie would do well this week too as they all spent hundreds kitting themselves out with stuff most of them would probably never use again. She would actively encourage their flirting and then fleece them blind whilst they were distracted by her cleavage. It was a crude strategy, but it was effective and she wasn't shy about using it, even on any female customers that showed an interest. For a straight girl she had a surprisingly effective gaydar.

But neither the rain, corporate gits nor my manipulative sister could dampen my mood this morning. All thoughts of them evaporated the second I turned back to the blonde in the bed. She was different. Inexplicably but undeniably different. I had always been my own woman in whatever relationships I had entered before. I have a life and friends that are important to me, and if a girl got too clingy or demanding of my time, it was time to let her go. I never felt the need to share everything about myself, and always hated those couples who merged into a single unit and became shadows of the individuals they were. But this blonde had split me right open. I felt so relieved that I had been able to open up to her yesterday. I felt mentally and even physically stronger for it. The only person who had seen that much of me had been Effy. I liked the rest of the world at a comforting distance, including all my other mates and even my twin. I wasn't unfriendly, or even naturally secretive like Effy, I just didn't feel the need to put everything on display. But there was something about Naomi that made me want to share my deepest hopes and fears with her, and felt completely safe putting my heart in her hands. Maybe it was simply because she was the very best person I had ever met.

I like to think I have a healthy amount of self-respect, and I do dearly love all of my friends and family, but for all of that we all clearly have our faults. Cook is a plonker and Katie's a bitch. Freddie's a loser and Effy takes too many drugs. My mother's a bigot and my brother's a perv. My Dad is a legend, but he's a coward when it comes to my Mum. I'm no fucking angel either, but Naomi, Naomi is just good. And honest. And honourable. And trusting. I think part of the reason I wanted to tell her everything is because she didn't ask. She was prepared to love me without getting all up in my business, and even when she was jealous of Effy, she never tried to take her from me. I knew Naomi had a beast of an intelligence, and a brain that could retain and understand incredibly complex ideas and systems, but at the heart of her she was a very simple soul who just wanted to love and be loved, and do the very best she could to make the world a better place. It made me feel uncharacteristically soppy, and as I looked back over at her with one arm, one leg and half of her cute as fuck little bum poking out from under the duvet, I was forced to concede that it also made me very horny.

No time for that this morning though. Thomas was still in Bristol and I had to drive Naomi down to the harbour before going to face my day of slow death by corporate moron. The alarm on my phone sprung into life beside the bed, shocking Naomi from her slumbers. A stupid smile exploded onto my face as I watched her instinctively reach out for me.

"Ems?" she said blearily.

"I'm here," I replied, before jumping back onto the bed and kissing her on the nose. "Time to get up, Sleeping Beauty, busy day ahead. Experiments to be done and idiots to manage in the water."

I didn't think it was possible for anyone to look that beautiful whilst pouting stroppily, but Naomi proved me wrong. I had to close my eyes and look away, otherwise I would have been toast.

The rain had pretty much soaked us by the time we got to Effy's boat, but it didn't really matter, both of us were going to spend most of the day wet, and not in the good way. I walked down the jetty hand in hand with her, telling myself it was because I wanted to say hi to Effy before I left, but knowing I was really just procrastinating.

"She's not here," frowned Naomi. "It's all locked up."

"Probably just having breakfast at Rita's," I shrugged. "It's ok, I've got a key. I'll let you in so you don't have to wait in the rain."

I let us in to the cabin, then decided I could do with a bit more practice for my attempt at the world procrastination record by making a cup of coffee. I had only gotten as far as putting the kettle on when Effy came crashing down into the cabin with a face like thunder. I stared at her in astonishment as she went straight to the cupboard where she hid her personal stash tin and pulled out a bag of coke. Both Naomi and I watched wide-eyed and speechless as she racked out a monster line for herself.

"What?" she said aggressively when she noticed me staring. "Do you want some? I would have thought it was a little early in the day for you."

"Actually I was thinking it was a little early in the day for you," I said.

"Whatever," she shrugged, and snorted up the powder.

"Effy, what are you doing?" I frowned.

"What does it matter?" she retorted. "I can still drive the fucking boat. Then all I have to do is sit around whilst Cousteau here does science."

"You know this isn't good for you," I insisted.

"Thanks for caring," she said sarcastically.

Much as I love Effy, there are moments when she has pushed me dangerously close to rage, and this was one of them. Fortunately Naomi sensed the tension and stepped in to save the day.

"It's ok, Emily. I'll keep an eye on her," she said.

"I don't need a fucking babysitter," growled Effy.

"I know you don't," said Naomi calmly. "But Emily loves you, and it will make her feel better if she thinks that someone's got your back. And I'm all about making Emily feel better."

The dark clouds that surrounded Effy seemed to part a little at her words.

"Sharp," she conceded. "She's definitely a keeper this one, Ems."

"I know," I said, seeing yet another facet to the Naomi jewel that dazzled me. Effy and I locked eyes, and for a moment it seemed like she was on the verge of spilling, but then the shutters came down again.

"Well give her a kiss and fuck off then," she said. "Haven't you got wankers to train?"

I resigned myself to the fact that I wouldn't be getting anything else out of her for now, so I did as she suggested and kissed my girl goodbye. As I walked back down the jetty, I tried to assess whether or not Effy was getting worse. Ever since I had known her she had teetered constantly between enjoying drugs for fun, and using them to block out her emotions, flirting dangerously with addiction. Usually it balanced itself out somehow, but I could never allow myself to become complacent. I'd never forgive myself if something happened to her and I wasn't there to help her. It was one of the reasons I always made sure I had time for her, even through my obsession with Naomi. I was so lost in my thoughts, I almost didn't notice my sister leaning up against the side wall of Rita's café, rubbing her temples with her fingertips. Riddle fucking solved.

"What have you done to her this time?" I demanded angrily. Marching up to her.

"Yeah that's right, cause it's always fucking my fault isn't it?" she spat in retaliation. "You always take her side, don't you?"

"She's my best friend," I said. "I care about her."

"I'm your fucking sister, bitch," seethed Katie. "Believe it or not, I have fucking feelings too, you know."

"Why don't you enlighten me?" I said harshly.

"You have no fucking idea, do you?" sighed Katie. "Even your fucking girlfriend is nicer to me than you are."

We glared at each other like angry strangers for a minute or two, until Katie broke the silence.

"So are you going to give me a ride to work or what?" she said.

"Is my name Asif?" I scoffed, unwillingly to let her win.

"Fuck you, Emily," she said with her usual venom, but her eyes filled up and she looked on the verge of tears.

It shocked me. Nobody ever saw Katie Fitch cry. It reminded me that despite my own allegiances, there were always two sides to the story, and though her love was pure, Effy was certainly no saint.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm just in an iffy mood. I'll give you a ride."

"What's up bitch?" said Katie, trying to salvage her dignity. "Blondie not putting out this morning?"

My mind drifted back to me and Naomi at the secret lagoon, and stayed there until I heard Katie laughing.

"You should see your face," she mocked. "It's really kinda gross. I hope you realise how lucky you are."

.

.

.

The next evening I left Naomi catching up with Thomas, and made sure I was around for Effy. If she really was having a wobble, then tonight would be even worse for her. I had tried to get her away from the village to go and see a movie in Swansea or something, but she had insisted she just wanted to go down to the pub and have a normal night. I didn't really know why, but Effy always hated her birthday. She never celebrated it and went to great lengths to conceal it from the others. I always brought her a present for it, but would often save it and give it to her on some other random day so as not to draw attention. Of course she was onto my little game, but she appreciated the effort as long as we kept it between ourselves. A normal night down the pub would probably be the best thing for us. We could just hang out and chat like best mates do, and have a pleasant evening with no drama. We were only about halfway down our first pint when that plan got blown to cock.

Effy was laughing at one of my adorable geeky Naomi stories when all the humour suddenly drained out of her face. I looked up to see Freddie approaching with a flashy bunch of flowers.

"Hi Effy," he said nervously.

"What's the matter, did somebody die?" she said eyeing the gaudy bouquet.

"What these?" said Freddie. "No these are for you."

He reached out his arm to present them to her.

"Happy Birthday," he said pleasantly.

This was not good. This was not good at all.

"Who the fuck told you about it?" hissed Effy.

"Um no one. I just.. I just sort of found out," mumbled Freddie.

"Stalker," said Effy accusingly.

"I just wanted to give you something nice," he said, the hurt showing in his puppy dog eyes.

Oh Freddie, you fuckwit. Never show Effy your pain. She'll only go and twist the knife.

"Then why don't you go and give them to someone who gives a fuck," she said coldly.

She downed the rest of her pint in one, grabbed her cigarettes from the table and headed for the back door.

"Maybe I will," retorted Freddie at her receding back.

"That went well," I sighed. "Face it, Freds. You're never going to be a match for my sister."

I looked up at him only to find that his usual wistful hangdog expression had been replaced by one of anger.

"You know what? Fuck her, just fuck her," he said and stormed off.

I felt like I should have been storming off too just to fit in, but it really would have been a cheat. I was a lucky girl. My obsessive love was completely requited. I finished my pint in silence, hoping that the cigarette would have calmed Effy down and we could get back to our evening. With that in mind I wandered over to the bar, to get us another round of drinks. As I squeezed back out of the crowd at the bar, my mouth dropped open in horror at the sight that unfolded before me. Katie was cooing over the very same bunch of flowers, whilst Freddie leaned in far too close to her to just be being friendly. He was smiling and making eyes at her, and Katie was drinking it all in like it was the finest champagne. Oh twenty thousand levels of fuck. I had to stop Effy from seeing that or she was going to go ballistic. I whirled around with the two pints still in my hands, frantically searching the pub for her, but I was too late. She was barely in the back door, but her eyes were riveted to the spectacle. Emotions were cycling through them like the flash cuts from a horror movie trailer. Fear, anger, betrayal, disbelief, pain and abhorrence blazed through her at a thousand miles an hour as she stood stock still and entranced by her worst fucking nightmare playing out before her. Her adrenalin was amping up inside her, pushing her towards the edge where she would choose between fight or flight.

In the end she just turned and ran. I only hesitated for a second before I shoved both pints towards a confused but grateful Jonno, and started fighting my way out of the pub behind her. But I wasn't quick enough, by the time I made it through the door, Effy was nowhere to be seen. That girl could run like a cheetah when her mood dictated it. I tried her phone, even though I knew she wouldn't answer it, and when the call went through to voicemail, I felt my blood begin to boil. Effy may have chosen to run, but my body was screaming at me to fight. I pushed my way angrily back into the pub, and stormed over to the flirting couple.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" I practically screamed at Katie.

She seemed momentarily shaken by the ferocity of my rage, but quickly recovered herself.

"What does it look like?" she said haughtily. "I'm getting chatted up by a hunky guy."

She flashed her eyes at Freddie when she said the words 'hunky guy', and he grinned back at her sheepishly. I was sick of the whole fucking pantomime.

"How the fuck could you do this to her?" I said angrily.

Katie's head shot back towards me. At least she had the decency not to pretend she didn't know what I was talking about. She even looked a little guilty.

"It's not my fault I like guys," pouted Katie. "Look, he gave me these lovely flowers."

I took a deep breath, trying to be reasonable, trying to control my rage, but it wasn't really working.

"I know you're not into her," I said. "But do you have to rub it in her face? With him? Jesus Katie, it's her fucking birthday."

Katie's face fell.

"I didn't know," she said apologetically. "She never said."

"And you," I said rounding on Freddie and shoving him in the chest. "How dare you use my fucking sister just to get back at Effy, you cunt."

"Say what?" said Katie, her eyes narrowing dangerously.

"I wasn't. I didn't," stuttered Freddie.

"I was fucking there, you lying knobjockey," I yelled at him.

"What are you talking about, Ems?" said Katie.

"Your precious fucking flowers," I said, flicking contemptuously at the bouquet. "He bought them for Effy, but when she refused them he thought he'd come and try them out on you. Just cause he knew you'd be all over him and it would piss her off. But this isn't just going to piss her off Katie, it's going to send her into fucking meltdown."

Katie looked down at the treacherous blooms as she listened to her dream disintegrating round her ears.

"You have to come and help me look for her. I don't know what the fuck she's going to do," I pleaded.

"Ok," said Katie. "And Freddie pull your trousers up."

He obediently yanked his keks up from where they sat fashionably half way down his arse.

"And Freds, you can pretty much fuck off now," she said grabbing at the front of his baggy jeans, and shoving the flowers down his crotch.

Katie grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the pub.

"Have you tried phoning her?" she said.

"Yeah, but she never fucking answers," I replied.

"Then we better split up. Will she go to the boat?"

"No, cause she won't want me to find her and stop her from fucking herself up."

"OK, I'll go this way," said Katie, turning on her heels and sprinting away.

An hour later and I had found no trace of Effy. I'd had no word from Katie either, and I found myself standing forlornly by the duckpond in the pissing rain. I contemplated widening my search, making a mental list of all of our favourite hangouts, but as I stood there I suddenly realised how cold and tired and wet I was. My adrenalin dropped, and all the life seemed to drain right out of me. I couldn't hold the surge of emotion that washed over me, and I started to cry, unashamedly bawling my eyes out with only the ducks to witness it. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone, speed dialling Katie. I howled in frustration when I got her voicemail, and threw the phone down into the grass. Luckily, I had gotten myself one of those shockproof and damp proof ones to go with my lifestyle, so a few seconds later I had picked it up and was frantically punching at Naomi's contact. I was done with being strong. I needed someone to look after me. I swore openly at the recorded message, before remembering that she had fucked her phone with her impetuous dive into the water. The thought of it made me smile briefly, even through my tears. I searched through my contacts till I found Thomas's number, and prayed they were still together.

By the time he had passed the phone over I could do little more than sob down the line at her. She didn't even try to ask me what was wrong.

"Where are you?" she said.

"Duckpond," I managed to blubber out.

"I'm coming for you," she said.

She continued talking at me as she left the house, saying soothing words and telling me it was going to be alright. I felt like I was drowning out here in the hammering rain, but her voice was a fucking lifeline.

"Emily my love, I'm going to have to put the phone down now," she said calmly. "Cause I'm going to drive very fast, and I will need to concentrate. Stay alive, I will find you."

I stood there, clutching the phone to my chest as if the warmth of her voice was still emanating from it to protect me, and listened for the sound of engines. It only seemed like minutes before I could make out the growling sound of Thomas's beat up car, and then seconds later saw it hurtling towards me. Naomi screeched to a halt, and flung the door open, running towards me and wrapping me tightly in her arms.

"I've got you, I've got you," she said, kissing the top of my head. "I've got you. Everything's going to be ok."

I lost myself in her for a moment. It felt so good to have her. To have someone I could rely on completely. Someone who would let me be weak, and still love me for it. But then I realised that I still had to be that someone for someone else.

"We have to look for Effy," I said.

"What happened?" asked Naomi.

"She caught Freddie flirting like a bastard with Katie, and Katie was loving every minute of it."

"Fuck, she's so stupid," sighed Naomi.

"She can't help who she loves," I said defensively. "If she could get over it, she would have done by now. Freddie was being an arsehole."

"I wasn't talking about Effy," said Naomi, pulling back from the embrace and kissing me lightly on the lips. "Just tell me where you want to go."

"I love you," I said urgently.

It seemed it was unfettered emotion night tonight.

"I love you too," replied Naomi, kissing me again, and before I knew it I had my hands in her hair and was kissing her passionately as though it was the only thing keeping me alive. The rain pelted down around us, drumming into the duckpond and onto the roof of the car. A carload of lads drove past us, tooting their horn and yelling indistinguishable crap out of the window, but nothing could pull me from that kiss. Nothing except the sound of Effy's ringtone buzzing away in my hand.

"Where are you?" I said, repeating Naomi's earlier question, desperate to get to her as fast as I could.

"I'm ok," said Effy.

"Where are you?" I repeated.

"I'm not wasted," replied Effy calmly, and to be fair she sounded completely coherent. "And I'm going to be alright. I'm sorry I worried you."

"What happened?" I asked.

"Nothing," said Effy. "I'm just going to go home now. Everything's cool."

"We'll drive over there and meet you," I said, realising she wasn't going to tell me where she was.

"No, don't," she said. "Honestly, I'm fine. Get that girl of yours to take you home and get warm. I'll talk to you in the morning."

"Are you sure?" I insisted.

"Please Emily," she said. "Just let me chill. I'm sorry I upset you, but I really am going to be ok. I promise you, you don't have to worry about me. I haven't even had a drink."

"Ok," I said reluctantly. "But I'm coming over first thing in the morning."

"Give my love to Naomi," she said, and I could almost feel the smirk coming down the phone. Amazingly this was cool Effy I was talking to, and somehow that fruit machine of emotions I had seen in her earlier had landed on an unexpected jackpot of calm.

Naomi took me back to the cottage. I didn't want to be anywhere near the free for all that was the rest of the Fitch family at a time like this. I had texted Katie to tell her Effy was ok, and got a weirdly Effy-like 'Sweet', in reply. But I had pretty much had enough of the rest of the world and its problems for today. I had my pretty bubble of love and fluffiness, and I was going to wallow in it. Naomi ran me a bath, after telling me that although the drowned rat look was still hot on me she didn't want me to catch pneumonia and go die on her. She had lit candles, and poured something lush and gorgeous smelling into the water, and it only took her seconds after I had gotten in for her to decide to shed her clothes and join me. It was the most perfect fucking feeling, just lying back against her soft body in the candle light with the steam, the hot water and the bubbles creating a gorgeous ambience. Her hand stroked lazily up and down my arm, and she nuzzled her lips against my shoulder and neck. Katie's words from the previous morning came floating back into my head – I hope you realise how lucky you are.

"I'm so glad I found you," I said.

"And now you've found me, are you going to keep me?" smiled Naomi.

"Oh God yes," I said. "You're precious."

"I like that," she replied. "Precious. And I know you're tough as shit and kinda badass, but for moments like this, I'll always be here for you."

I was fucking lucky, and I knew it. Naomi had made a home for my heart. I felt a sudden sadness for all the players in the Gower's longest standing fucked up soap opera love triangle, and hoped that some day that would find a way to stop hurting each other. That some day they'd all be able to find a love like this.

.

.

.

Next morning I crept awake into the dull light of another overcast day. I smiled as I looked at the half open curtains, loving how Naomi had become a creature of the light with me. She had soon learned that she could quite easily sleep through the coming of the dawn, but that she woke up happier if she woke into the light. I left her in the bed and started to collect my clothes.

"Hmmph," I heard from the duvet behind me. "There's an Emily shaped hole in my bed."

"I have to go and check on Effy," I said.

"I know," said Naomi, poking her dishevelled head from under the covers. "Good luck with that. I'm going to sleep, cause _somebody_ kept me awake half the night making sure I knew how much she loves me."

A celestial warmth flooded through the whole of my body as I remembered another night of astonishingly intense and intimate lovemaking.

"I'll never get tired of seeing that particular smile," said my messy headed angel, reading my thoughts. "You are an amazing lover, now go and be a great friend."

"I love you," I told her.

"Seriously, I know," she grinned at me. "My body feels like it's shining."

I felt like I was shining too as I ambled through the harbour to the boat. Despite my best friend's track record after incidents like this, I felt no trepidation. I no longer felt as helpless as I had the night before. My night with Naomi had refuelled me and given me the power to deal with whatever I might find this morning. Or maybe not…

The living quarters were empty so I automatically pushed on through to the bedroom, expecting to jump on into the bed and give a sleepy Effy a cuddle as I had done so many mornings in the past. Except that Effy was not alone. There was someone in the bed with her. A very naked someone. My very naked sister lying propped up on one elbow, gazing down at a naked sleeping Effy with nothing short of adoration.

"The fuck?" I exclaimed in a half whisper.

"Ssshh," mouthed Katie, waving her hand at me. "Don't wake her up. I'll come outside."

She slid out of the bed and I couldn't help but look her up and down. Yep, totally butt naked, with remnants of last night's make up and totally crazy bed hair. No, make that sex hair. I only realised how far my mouth was hanging open, when Katie put her finger under my chin and pushed it shut.

"Come on," she whispered, throwing on one of Effy's big jumpers over her dress, and taking me by the hand. She took me outside and sat me down on the back deck. I could scarcely believe the intimate beauty of the scene I had just witnessed, a perfectly peaceful Effy, her hair scattered gorgeously across the pillows, whilst Katie had watched her with an exquisite tenderness.

"You were naked," I said, grasping onto the only thing I could focus on.

"Yeah," said Katie smugly.

"So was Effy," I added.

"That would be because we slept together," said Katie slowly, as if she was explaining the facts of life to an idiot.

"How?" I stuttered.

"Ems, if I have to explain to you what girls do in bed together then we really are in trouble," she laughed.

"I meant how did it happen?" I said, still in shock.

"I knew where to find her," answered Katie. "She'd gone to our place."

"You have a place?"

"Yeah, that bench in that little aboretum thing behind the church. It's where we go when we want to talk to each other."

"You talk to each other?"

"I'm not a total monster," said Katie. "I always did care about her. I just never thought I could give her what she wanted."

"And now?" I said cautiously.

"You should have told me, Ems," she said.

"Told you what?"

"How beautiful it was. What a fucking incredible person she is."

"I've been telling you for three years," I frowned.

"Yeah ok," admitted Katie. "Well I should have fucking listened."

"So you're ok with this?"

She didn't have the time to answer as we were disturbed by the sound of Effy's distressed voice coming from inside the cabin. Katie shot to her feet as Effy emerged from inside dressed only in a T-shirt.

"Katie?" she cried anxiously.

Katie met her halfway down the steps, wrapped her arms around her and kissed her lovingly on the mouth.

"I'm here," she said soothingly. "It's ok, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. Emily came round and I didn't want to wake you up."

Effy glanced over my sister's shoulder at me, before Katie took her into a deeper and more passionate kiss. I struggled to find some kind of handle on this as I watched them kissing. Kissing like lovers do. My straighter than a Roman road sister and the woman who's passion she had denied since we were eighteen years old.

"You're not leaving me?" said Effy breathlessly.

"No," said Katie, her voice laden with conviction as she gently tucked a strand of hair behind her lover's ear. "So now that we've got that sorted out, who's for breakfast? Cause I am fucking starving."

Katie marched down into the galley and started rifling through Effy's cupboards and fridge. Effy plonked herself down on one of the seats and stared helplessly at the enthusiastic chef, before turning slowly to face me.

"WHAT?" I mouthed at her silently, behind Katie's back.

"I KNOW!" she mouthed back, with a look of sheer incredulity on her face.

Effy reached for my hand under the table as we watched Katie prepare one of her legendary fry-ups, squeezing my fingers tightly as if that could somehow prove that all of this was really happening.

"Effy, do you want to put some coffee on, Babes," said Katie.

"Sure," said Effy, almost falling over herself to comply.

I watched them working together in the tiny space, and saw Katie trail her hand down Effy's back and gently across her arse. I couldn't believe how blasé she was being about this, as if it was just another ordinary day, smiling at Effy as we ate, and constantly touching her with little gestures of affection. Effy didn't normally eat much breakfast, but this one she wolfed down like a true Fitch, simply because it had been prepared for her by the woman she adored.

"Gotta take a shower, hun," said Katie, slugging down the last of her tea, and giving Effy another kiss. "Cause as much as I like it, I don't think my customers would appreciate me stinking of dirty hot lesbo sex."

"Effy. Effy," I said as I tried in vain to distract her attention from where it was glued in the direction of where Katie was taking a shower. In the end I had to physically move her head round to face me.

"Effy, are you ok?" I said.

"She made love to me, said Effy in a daze. "And she doesn't regret it."

"What the fuck happened?" I asked her, but her head had drifted back to the bedroom door, and she stared at it as wistfully and loyally as a puppy left outside a shop.

"Effy," I repeated.

"Huh?" she muttered, as I grabbed her face and turned it back towards me once more. I was about to make another attempt to get some sense out of her, but Katie re-emerged from the bedroom fully dressed and ready to conquer, and I knew all hope was lost.

"Emily, lift," she commanded, and I could see Effy visibly swoon at the authority in her voice.

"Bye bye, beautiful," said Katie, giving Effy another sumptuous kiss. "Come and see me in the shop later, yeah?"

And with that she swept magnificently from the boat.

"I'll be back," I promised Effy, before trundling obediently after my sister, and following the purposeful thunk thunk of her heels against the wooden deck of the jetty.

Yes, Hurricane Katie had struck, leaving us poor sailors shell shocked and shipwrecked in her wake.


	21. A History Of Violence

**And so, seeing as you all asked so nicely…. **

**I don't own Skins, but Effy Stonem owns my heart. Nor do I own the Cronenburg film that inspired the title, but it's a damn fine movie.**

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21. A History Of Violence

Effy

I can tell you to the precise minute exactly the moment when I fell in love. I know because I checked my phone right afterwards, wanting to record the moment for posterity in my head. Because in that moment my whole life had changed completely. I had just witnessed something unimaginable, something I had never witnessed before. Someone had stood up to my mother. The reason that I had never seen it before was that it was usually a life-threatening activity. Those who had dared it in the past had been so summarily dispatched, that others had learned to hold their tongue.

It would be fair to say that my family had a history of violence. My Dad had been an average criminal, certainly not a grunt but not so ambitious as to give his superiors cause for concern. He did his job, and controlled his little slice of their empire with the minimum of fuss. I'm not saying he was a saint. I know he had done questionable things. You wouldn't mess with Jim Stonem, and you wouldn't get in the way of his business, but he had the reputation of being fair rather than vindictive, and he certainly liked to keep the business out of the limelight. He was old school. He had rules.

But on the day of my ninth birthday party he was gunned down in the street in the crossfire of some new turf war, and I had the misfortune to watch it happen. I remember the delighted shouts of the other children at the party playing behind me as I stared eagerly out of the front window waiting for Daddy to come home with the extra special present he had promised me. He had pulled up in front of our house and got out of the car flanked by his two ever-present bodyguards. He looked up to see me waving frantically out of the window at him, and he raised his hand to wave back. Distracted, he didn't notice the other car hurtling down the street until it was too late.

It took only seconds from the moment I started screaming for my mother to be at my side, but as she realised what had happened I watched her concern for me morph into something else entirely. It was like watching a light go out in her eyes, to be replaced with something colder, harder and much, much darker.

I didn't just lose a father that day. I lost a mother too, or at least the one I used to have. Being only nine at the time, I had no idea how involved Mum had been in Dad's business up until then, but it had always seemed that she was there to be a proper mum to me and Tony. But that was the day she stopped being 'Mum' and became Anthea Stonem – a name that was soon to strike terror into the hearts of hardened criminals from here to the Mediterranean.

Anthea took over Jim's slice of the business and her first act in charge was to start a war. She waged a vicious campaign of revenge on the gang who had ordered the hit, soon controlling their stake in the capital as well as her own. The power behind Jim's modest throne had risen clothed in a black fury. She developed a talent for brutality unmatched by her closest competitors, and began making serious waves within the status quo. She used to tell us that she was doing it for the family, so that she could make us safe, and I'm sure that at the beginning her motives were simply to avenge the death of her husband, and destroy the people who had traumatised her little girl. But Anthea was a natural born killer, and she soon grew to love the power. Lesser criminals will always sense a shifting balance, and ally themselves with the strongest force, and soon Anthea's reputation began to hold considerable weight. With less ambition she could have satisfied herself with running the business like Dad did, leaving himself time to have a life outside of work, time to let her children have a stab at a normal life.

But Anthea knew she was better at this than Jim had ever been. In only a few short months she had massively increased her sphere of influence. The higher ups had recognised her talents, but they were concerned she was getting too big for her boots. They sent an influential envoy to reign in her enthusiasm and make sure she toed the line. He never left. Anthea saw this as another threat to her position and her family, so she started a revolution. And won. Anyone with any sense could see where the future lay, and soon she became more powerful still. It took another two bloody years for the dust to settle, but at the end of it, most of Anthea's rivals lay dead and her empire stretched across many international borders. I never did get that extra special birthday present my Dad had promised me, but for my tenth birthday Anthea gave me my first gun.

Anthea never tried to protect us from the harsh realities of our world, in fact she seemed to take it on herself to try to make us as hard as she was. Tony seemed to take to it instinctively, and as young as sixteen, he was already working for the family. It didn't sit so easily with me. It was all I had ever known, and I had watched us grow quite quickly from comfortably well off to super rich. I liked the feeling of money and glamour, and we swopped our London home for life on a luxury yacht. We mixed with pop stars and politicians. We were in Cannes for the film festival and Monaco for the grand prix. I wore fabulous dresses to casinos and fucked any man or woman I liked. Drugs and alcohol were readily available and I never had to worry about going to school. Anthea hired tutors for me, but I was under no obligation to attend their lessons. I was headed for a life of glamorous luxury paid for in other people's blood.

Except somewhere along the line I had somehow developed a conscience. I was surrounded by people who couldn't give a fuck, and I had no idea where this strange concept of morality came from. Maybe it was because I had seen the look of anguish in Dad's eyes as he fell, maybe it was because it was his death that had turned my mother into a monster, but I couldn't even contemplate inflicting that on someone else. But I was still only a teenager and in no way was I strong enough to stand up to the most powerful woman in the criminal underworld. I was even too confused and scared to voice my fears. So I ended up trying to discover what a normal life was like. I started hanging out with the crew of the boat, learning about the different aspects of their work and their lives. When we went ashore I would take the time to slip away from whatever glamorous event we were gracing with our presence, and walk over to the poorer side of town, to sit in local bars and watch the ordinary world go by. I became fascinated by the lives of the waiters and barmen who served us. When my mum first found me in a compromising position with one of the maids on our boat, it became a standing joke between her and Tony that 'Effy likes a bit of rough'. They looked on it as a bit of harmless fun that Effy liked to get jiggy with the help, but this increasing exposure to a normal world was fast leading me to the conclusion that I could never live like them. I didn't want to be responsible for other people's pain.

The problem with all my encounters though, was that my lovers always knew their place. They were always older than me and had a job they wanted to keep or a place they wanted to be. I hadn't spent much time around people my own age. I hadn't been to school since I was nine, so I never encountered regular rebellious teenagers who were still working out who they wanted to be. Rebellion was not a common occurrence around the Stonem family. It was always assumed I would somehow find my place within the family business, or at least under the umbrella of its protection. So whilst my lovers offered me a temporary solace and a way of forgetting for a while, they could never offer me what I really wanted. A way out.

By this time Anthea ran her empire primarily on fear. Her reputation alone would ensure compliance from both her employees and her clients. But every now and again there would be some troublesome new young blood who thought he had the balls to take her on, and occasionally Anthea would even venture back into the field herself to pay the matter her personal attention, just to prove to anyone who might be getting ideas that she was still as dangerous as she had ever been. Which was how we had found ourselves moored up outside a tiny little harbour in some arse end of nowhere village in rural Wales. I declined Anthea's offer of driving up to Cardiff with her and Tony whilst they took care of business and instead decided to explore. I went into a little café on the edge of the harbour and spent the morning chatting with a lovely woman called Rita who ran the place. I could have listened all day to her beautiful sing song accent and her tales of the fishermen and the village, but she persuaded me I had to go and see the beach. She even lent me a bicycle so I could ride over there.

It was a stunningly beautiful place, a long wide sandy bay sparsely populated by dog walkers and surfers. As I walked along the empty sands, I felt a strange sensation of peace, probably for the first time since that fateful birthday party. The people I encountered bid me friendly hellos and I realised that they didn't know or care that I was connected to the infamous Stonem family. I could just be a girl on a beach taking a walk on a breezy spring day. I walked all the way to the other end of the bay and back, unwilling for the simple happiness of that day ever to end. That's why I accepted the offer of a drink from the cheeky boy in the car park where I'd left the bike. With his raggedy edged good looks and his ridiculously forthright chat up lines, he would certainly do as my bit of rough for the night.

Anthea and Tony and their goons reappeared the next day clearly satisfied with whatever it was they had done, and Anthea declared that instead of pissing off in the boat again as I'd expected, we were actually going to hang around for a few days. It amused her no end to playact a normal family seaside holiday, even though we were followed everywhere by the usual bunch of unpleasant looking minders. Though the place itself was still as beautiful as ever, the experience was totally different as we steamrollered our way about with the usual arrogance of the rich. I affected my trademark 'bored with everything' persona to distance myself from Anthea and Tony, and I longed for the gentle calm of that first day and the easy company of people like Rita and Cook. At night we'd go back to the yacht, and I would find myself leaning on the rail of the deck looking back over the harbour, having fantasies about being moored here permanently living a simple life amongst people who weren't afraid of me.

It didn't take long for the novelty to wear off and for Anthea to declare that she was bored. She decided she would take us to dinner at the local pub, and that we would set sail for more interesting waters in the morning. I had to admit that the thought of yet another evening listening to Anthea and Tony banging on about stuff didn't exactly fill me with excitement, so the first thing I did when we got there was head off to the toilets for a monster line of coke. Of course that meant I was hardly in the mood for a big meal, so I picked disinterestedly at a salad, whilst I searched for something else to entertain me.

In typical fashion I started to fixate on the waitress. Even overworked and sweating and slightly grumpy she was stunningly beautiful. She was roughly the same age as me, which was a new and interesting bonus. Her brunette hair was starting to come adrift from where she'd pinned it up for work, and her tight little uniform accentuated a delicious selection of real woman's curves. She had fierce and lively brown eyes, and a magnificent pair of tits a girl could lose herself for days in. Even more impressive was the fact that she seemed totally disinterested in my mother's bullying antics, and my brother's crude attempts to grab her arse every time she came to the table. It looked like she was the only girl on duty that night, and only seemed to want to do her job, and get through her excessive workload as quickly and as fairly as possible, despite how difficult the rest of my family seemed intent on making that for her.

"Back off Tony," I hissed as she deftly manoeuvred herself away from his grasp once more.

"What's up Effykins?" he smirked. "Fancy a piece for yourself do ya? I know you have a thing for the service professions."

I merely glared at him.

"Whatever," he shrugged. "Bitch is all yours. Plenty more Welsh slags where she came from."

I didn't show it, but I was absolutely furious with him. I was used to him talking like that, but for some reason I couldn't stand him bad-mouthing this beautiful, fair, hard-working woman. He was right though. I did want her. Not just because she was gorgeous, but because she offered the chance of one last night with someone honest before I re-entered the sleazy world I reluctantly spent my days in.

We had reached the dessert by the time Anthea finally pushed her too far, loudly demanding that she brought us more wine whilst she was in the middle of serving someone else. She slammed her notebook down and marched over to our table fronting up to my mother like a tiny ball of pure fury. I was stunned. Never in my whole life had I seen anyone give Anthea attitude. She seemed oblivious both to my mother's intimidation tactics, and to the increasingly edgy goons on the tables around her. She knew she was in the right and she was determined to stand her ground. Anthea decided to goad the young woman, deliberately lighting up a fag in defiance of the smoking ban.

"I think you'll find that I can do what the fuck I like," she sneered.

"Not in my fucking pub you can't," retorted the girl. "Now put that fucking fag out or get the fuck out."

I was mesmerised. The fiery-tempered beauty was not going to back down. I felt my adrenalin start to rise. I didn't know what the fuck was going to happen, but I knew I couldn't let any harm come to her.

"Who do you think you are, little girl?" threatened Anthea.

Her tone in itself would have had most people grovelling and begging for forgiveness, but not this magnificent everyday warrior princess. She grabbed the fag from my mother's mouth and stubbed it out in her sticky toffee pudding.

"I'm Katie Fucking Fitch," she said defiantly. "Who the fuck are you?"

And that was the moment that I fell in love. Nine thirteen pm. Three years, two months and eleven days ago. I knew in that moment and in the few seconds standoff that followed it, that I would take a fucking bullet for that girl. Luckily I didn't have to. Somehow my mother managed to see the funny side, and actually admired Katie for her ballsiness. She bought drinks for everybody in the pub, and made sure she left Katie a massive tip. For Anthea it would become an amusing anecdote. Something for her to entertain her cronies with. The story of the little Welsh waitress with the stones to stand up to Anthea Stonem. But for me it was a life-changing epiphany.

I immediately abandoned my plans to get into her pants. Katie Fucking Fitch was far too important to waste on a one night stand. I wanted to woo her. I wanted to love her, and I wanted her to love me back. Her unflinching courage had shown me the way to mine. She had given me a reason to take a stand. She had given me a reason to live.

I went back to the yacht that night, but instead of leaning on the railings wistfully dreaming about the life I could have had, I started packing so I could actually go and live it. I didn't take too much, just a few clothes, a laptop and an iPod. I got one of the boat crew to take me ashore, telling him I was going to see a girl and that I'd be back in the morning. They were so used to me keeping myself to myself, it took them a day and a half to realise I was gone. When Anthea rang me, much to my surprise she didn't lose her rag at me, or immediately dispatch a bunch of goons to fetch me back. She merely laughed, and told me to let her know when I was done shagging the waitress and was ready to come home.

Sadly, my attempts to woo Katie hadn't exactly gone to plan, but I never went back. Home became a small boat in the harbour. I met Emily and the others, and found myself a reasonably happy life. And even though I wasn't with the love of my life, I was near her. Even though Katie hadn't turned out to be the faultless angel I'd imagined her to be, I still loved her, and there was no one who came close to her. For the first year and a half since I revealed my feelings, we had sparred angrily with one another, and I distracted myself with random shags and an extended on/off dalliance with Cook.

But then came that fateful New Year's Eve. The night she kissed me. The night I knew that she felt something too, however deeply it was buried. But she was terrified of it. It was just after that, that she decided to develop her obsession with that wanker Freddie. He had just formed his retarded little band, and in her eyes it seemed to make him suddenly cool. But he wasn't cool. He was a twat. The stupid little fucker had been following me round trying to get into my pants ever since I'd landed, even when I told him I was in love with someone else. In former times I would have retaliated. Gone out and fucked some random right up in her face, but ever since that kiss I knew that no one else could ever satisfy me. Even the thought of someone else touching me became repulsive to me. I promised her I'd wait for her because really, what other choice did I have? Everything I'd ever dreamed of was Katie Fucking Fitch.

Inevitably there were times when I got angry and frustrated. There were days when I cursed myself that I hadn't managed to fall in love with the kind, intelligent, daring, available and beautifully gay Emily instead. There were all those nights when I had to watch Katie throwing herself at yet another useless prick of a man, and all I could do was obliterate my brain with powerful cocktails of drink and drugs. But through all of that I could sense us slowly getting closer until there came a point where we could actually start to consider ourselves friends. Katie started to realise that she could trust me, and sometimes we could even joke about our situation. Unlike the rest of the world who were constantly trying to set me up with Emily, I began to think Katie was secretly flattered that I was sticking to my promise. There were points when I think she actively enjoyed her part in the platonic romantic friendship we had developed.

Bu though I mostly kept it from her for the sake of having her near, there was nothing remotely platonic about most of the Katie inspired thoughts that plummeted around my brain. I thought about her all the time, even dreamed of her at night. I thought about the taste of her lips, and how it felt to have my tongue reaching into her mouth. I thought about the delicious curve of her arse and the way her legs looked so fantastic in her heels. I thought about her open and panting beneath me. I thought about her dominating me, pinning me down and fucking me hard. And of course I would waste away entire days thinking about my face implanted between those beautiful tits.

I knew I drove Emily to distraction. She was convinced that Katie would never fall for my charms, and although she loyally sang my praises to her sister, she was desperate for me to find someone else and move on. I know she did it out of love. She wanted me to be happy, and hated it when I fucked myself up over Katie. But there was nothing I could do. All it took was one flashback to the way she had kissed me in Cardiff, and I knew I was a fucking lost cause.

We had been coasting along in comfortable stalemate for a while until the convenient cat amongst the pigeons that was Cat. I knew who she was even as she was playing her little game in the pub. I knew the Ninjas were sending someone to see me, and I thought it was fucking hilarious the way she chose to find me. Of course I had to fess up to Emily, but I did nothing to dispel the rumours to anyone else. I was interested to see how Katie would react to the possibility of me being with someone else after all this time. And even though I knew there was no chance of anything going on between me and Cat, she was a beautiful and exotic stranger. And I was not above pushing Katie's buttons to see if she took the bait.

I got my answer yesterday morning when she cornered me outside Rita's café. I could see the anger in her eyes as she approached, and she didn't stop until she had slammed me against the wall, her hands almost around my throat. I tried to ignore the rush of desire I felt at her aggression, and waited for her to say her piece.

"So?" she demanded.

"So what, darling?" I said coolly.

"Don't 'darling' me, Effy Stonem," she said angrily. "What the fucking fuck is going on with the fucking blonde?"

I decided not to give in to her too easily.

"Tall, gorgeous, little bit geeky but massively intelligent?" I suggested. "Totally in love with your sister."

"Don't," warned Katie ominously. "A lot of people make the mistake of thinking that I'm stupid. I never thought you'd be one of them."

"Oh, the other one," I conceded. "Shorter, but equally gorgeous. American. Hiring the boat to do some diving…"

"Enough," said Katie, her body still pressed closely against mine. "Is it true what they're saying? Are you fucking her?"

"Would it matter to you if I was?" I asked her.

"Of course it would," snapped Katie. "You're supposed to be in love with me."

"I am in love with you," I admitted. "I've been in love with you since the day I met you. That's not even a question. The question is, are you ready to do something about it?"

Katie stared at me defiantly for a few seconds before lowering her eyes. And then, as if only now realising how closely our bodies were pressed together, she pulled away.

"I don't know," she said glumly.

I let out a sigh of frustration.

"I'm trying ok," she said insistently. "I like you, Effy, but I don't want to fuck up our friendship. I'm not gay."

"Yeah, I think we worked that one out a few years ago," I scoffed.

"I can't pretend to be someone I'm not, Eff," she said. "I can't fucking lie to you."

"And yet the thought of me being with Cat makes you violently jealous?"

"It's fucked up. I know that," she said, shuffling further away from me.

Suddenly the pent up emotion got too much for me and I started smacking my head back into the wall, enjoying the distracting rush I was getting from the pain.

"Stop!" yelled Katie, her eyes wide in alarm. "When are you going to stop doing this to yourself?"

"When are you going to stop throwing yourself at unsuitable men?" I retorted.

"They're not unsuitable," she pouted.

"Oh really?" I questioned her, raising my eyebrows. "Let's see. Freddie – in love with someone else. Thomas – in love with someone else. That hideous bloke from Quicksilver – just plain slimy. Dave Blake – turns out to be married. Carl Evans – only after one thing. Tall Adrian – only after two things."

I stared pointedly at her tits.

"It's almost like you want them to fail," I said aggressively. "Why do you think that is, Katie?"

"Stop it, just stop it," she said, her eyes starting to fill with tears. "I don't fucking know, ok? I don't fucking know. Just leave me alone, Effy. Fuck's sake."

"Your wish is my command," I said bitterly, and stormed off to get wankered.

I spent the day at sea with Naomi, getting pleasantly stoned in front of her fish TV. It was relaxing, and her company was easy. She wasn't one to hassle a girl who clearly wasn't up for hassling, and she was content to drift off into her doubtless Emily filled daydreams. If I'm honest, it was watching their relationship flourishing that was making me feel restless. I couldn't begrudge my best friend her happiness with the beautiful blonde, but I couldn't help but be jealous of it. I was relieved when Emily relinquished her lover for the day to be with me on my birthday. I'd never told her why I hated it so much, but she always did her best to help me through it with the minimum of trauma. I was actually looking forward to spending the night with her at the pub, until that tosspot Freddie showed up with his ridiculous bunch of flowers.

I didn't want to make things any worse, so I just took myself off for a fag, hoping he would get the message and just fuck off and leave me alone. But any hopes of a quiet night had exploded when I'd come back in and seen him all over my Katie. I'd had to run. I'd had to get out of there. Not because of the way Katie was simpering back at him, but because in those few moments I had stared at them, I had actually scared myself. I had been angry before, but what I'd experienced then had been a furiously violent hate. I hadn't been able to control myself. I found myself actually thinking about ordering a hit on him, or even getting my fucking gun and doing it myself. In those few moments it was like I hadn't escaped my history at all. I wasn't the good person I had tried to make myself. Even after all my efforts, I was still Anthea Stonem's daughter and that's all I would ever be. If loving Katie could bring me to this, maybe it was better that I didn't love her at all. I turned on my heels and fled the pub, already half blinded by my tears.

**Sorry Cat, had to sneak a dash of angst in here, but don't worry. It's not going to last.**


	22. A Fear Of Falling

**Two chapters in one day, I hear you ask. Well I couldn't really leave you hanging after the last one. Cat, you don't have to worry about the nurses anymore but be warned…Things might get a leetle bit dutty**.

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22. A Fear Of Falling

Katie

The stupid thing was that I had been so fucking happy. For five short minutes I thought I was about to get everything I'd ever wanted. But when Emily had come back into the pub she had smashed my dream to pieces with a swiftly delivered kick in the tits of truth. Of course Freddie didn't love me. He didn't even really want me, and he'd just made me rip the emotional guts out of the only person that did. The only thing that mattered now was finding her and stopping her from hurting herself again. I knew I'd fucked up badly this time, and it was up to me to sort it. I deliberately sent Emily the wrong way, cause even though I knew she would be worried about her friend, I wanted to be the one to find Effy. I knew I was the only one who could actually stop her from going off the deep end. And there was always the chance that I was wrong about where I thought she'd be, so it would be good to have Ems out there searching for her too. For once, I didn't give a shit that there was mud all over my shoes and the rain was fucking up my perfectly coiffured hair. Effy was all that mattered now.

I made my way straight over to the church. There was a little arboretum thing round the back of it with a high bench built into the wall. It has kind of become mine and Effy's little meeting place. It was where we went when we wanted to hide away from the prying eyes and the gossips. Something that was happening more and more. It was where she took me when she found me upset over Thomas before we ended up back at the boat. It was a place that meant something to us both, and if she wanted me to find her that's where she would be. I just prayed that she wanted me to find her.

Things with Effy had been complicated ever since she had arrived here. At first I just thought she was really cool, and was more than a little jealous that she seemed to have chosen Emily as a best friend. But then came the first bunch of flowers from my 'mystery admirer', swiftly followed by a series of beautiful gifts. I can still remember the thrill I experienced every time there was a new parcel at my door. It didn't feel creepy at all, because the gifts were so tasteful and the messages that accompanied them so beautifully worded. I was sure that when I met this mystery guy, he would turn out to be my Prince Charming. It felt really cute and old-fashioned and romantic to be courted rather than just propositioned, and I could sense my mother getting just as excited as I was, desperate to meet this wonderful gentleman. Emily remained unreservedly tight lipped about the whole thing. At the time I put it down to plain jealousy, but of course it was because she knew exactly who the gifts were coming from and was trying not to prejudice the eventual outcome.

I can remember as clear as if it were yesterday the night that Effy confessed the true identity of my suitor. I behaved like a spoilt child throwing my toys out of the pram, but I was furious that this amazing fantasy guy that I'd built up in my head had turned out to be a girl. Even back then it was because I'd allowed myself to fall for the idea of her, and I was incensed that I had been deceived. Of course, I hadn't really been deceived, I'd just made assumptions that the person who loved me was a guy. Cause it was obvious from the letters that she had sent me that it was love, but I let my anger and my embarrassment blind me to that fact. I never told my mother that it was Effy, simply made up some bullshit about 'him' having to move to Canada to deal with some family emergency, making 'him' out to be all noble and shit sacrificing 'his' own happiness for family duty. Yeah well, she fucking lapped that up, didn't she? She used to sit comforting me, and telling me that maybe one day 'he'd' be able to come back and find me.

That's when Effy and I entered what I like to call the 'Revenge Fucking' period. I was so unnerved, that I would jump on every piece of cock I could find, just to show myself and the world that I wasn't going to end up like my sister. Yes, I was that fucking shallow. Even though Emily was her own woman by then, and hugely popular despite the supposed stigma of being gay, I still couldn't stand to think that because a girl had fancied me, I would be tarred with the same brush. Effy fought back by doing exactly the same thing, except she didn't care whether it was boys or girls that she fucked. It made me mad because it somehow spoiled everything she had told me in those letters, everything that a part of me still wanted to believe. That I was brave, beautiful and amazing and worthy of being loved.

Those were dark days for both of us, with a lot of ill-advised fucking and drowning out the consequences with pills and booze. The thing I had been so terrified of people knowing had somehow become common knowledge anyway. Everyone knew that Effy was in love with me, and that she had been my mystery admirer all along. I tried to stay away from her as much as possible, especially when I had to listen to Cook telling me how good she was in bed and making lewd suggestions that we should get it on and let him watch. But it was hard to avoid her. She was my sister's best friend and she was always turning up at our house. Even Jenna fucking adored her, principally because she _wasn't _sleeping with Emily, I think.

There was a time when I found myself genuinely hoping that she would. The pair of them seemed so close and it would have been a neat little solution. I would get to have Effy in my life without the complications of sex, and Ems would get a beautiful girlfriend who I knew was capable of a deep and abiding love. Except that Effy's deep and abiding love remained stubbornly fixed in my direction, and so the games continued.

Until that night in Cardiff when everything changed. I was high as a fucking kite, fuelled with fluffy love drugs and thinking everyone was beautiful. It wasn't hard. All our drugs came from Effy and she never let me pay for any of them. At first I tried to offer, just so she wouldn't have any hold on me, but she simply refused. Left with the choice of going into Swansea and paying good money for some well dodgy shit, or getting the purest high quality gear for free, I swallowed my pride and took the freebies. To be fair, she never once tried to use it against me, and I knew she never let Ems pay for anything either.

So there we were, the whole gang of us bouncing around the club loving all the pretty things. I caught my sister surreptitiously edging herself closer to dancing with some stunning looking woman in the hopes of a sneaky midnight kiss, and thought about finding a hunky guy to do the same. I didn't fancy getting stuck with Cook or Jonno's tongues down my throat, so I started casting my eyes around and that's when I realised that Effy was missing. For some reason I abandoned my hunky guy search and became obsessed with finding her before the clock struck twelve. Looking back, I knew that whatever excuse I made up at the time, it was really because she was the one I wanted to kiss. I was curious. I'd seen my sister kissing quite a few girls by then, and although I always pretended I was grossed out, I was actually quite intrigued. My stupid fucking mother had always insisted that gay sex wasn't 'proper' sex, and yet Emily and her girls had never seemed bothered by that alleged fact. When I found Effy, I did my best to drag her back down to the gang. That way I could disguise my choice as the best of a bad bunch of options, and have an excuse to break away if it turned out to be weird. But she refused to come down and I stayed with her anyway. It was just a New Years' kiss, right? It didn't mean anything.

Except that it did. I could blame it on the drugs, and afterwards I repeatedly did, but I couldn't hide the fact that kissing Effy was fucking sensational. For a few glorious moments I lost myself in her completely. I simply hadn't expected it to feel that good. It was that, that made me want to run in the end, not the fact that I hated it. If it had been bad or even indifferent, I could have shrugged it off and gone back to how we were. But I felt the sexual pressure of her hips against me, and I knew that if I didn't stop it soon, I would end up sleeping with her. I panicked, but Effy had sensed that something had changed between us. She knew that I had felt something too, and she promised she would wait until I was ready.

A year and a half later and I still wasn't ready. Pathetic I know, but I was scared as hell. I'd developed my little obsession with Freddie as a defence mechanism, and I still behaved appallingly, desperately trying to find the magic prince who would take me away from my confusion. Effy was true to her word. She stopped sleeping with other people from that night onwards, and slowly my fear transformed from the fear of sleeping with another girl to the fear of Effy herself. Fear of this love that was so fucking powerful, all I could ever do would be to disappoint her. The longer she waited for me, the more terrifying it became, but I increasingly grew to like the fact that she was mine. I knew that I was taking her for granted, but it just seemed like I could fuck around as much as I like, and she would always be there for me.

Until the American had come and snatched my comfort blanket away from me. Even though I didn't deserve it, I was furious at the thought that Effy might have broken her promise to me. Which of course she hadn't, and it was stupid of me to doubt her. I was so close to kissing her when I had her up against the wall yesterday morning, but then she cut me with the inconvenient truth about the men I had taken an interest in. Had I really been setting myself up to fail?

It hadn't seemed like it when Freddie showed up with that beautiful bunch of flowers, but as I ran towards the church that night, I realised that the first thought that had shot into my head when he had, was 'this'll show Effy'. It wasn't really about Freddie at all. It was about her. About how over the years she had simply crept into my blood, and now she was a part of me. Whatever I did from this point on would somehow link back to her.

When I rounded the corner to the back of the church, I was relieved that I could hear noises from within the aboretum, but that sense of disbelief quickly dissipated when I realised the noise was of someone crying their fucking heart out. I ran to where Effy came into view and promptly froze. I had expected her to be angry. I had expected her to be wasted. What I hadn't expected was this terrifyingly raw display of pure emotion. Effy was always a hardnut. Effy didn't cry. She certainly didn't cry like this, as if somebody had literally reached in and pulled her heart right from her chest.

"Effy," I said helplessly, completely at a loss as to what to do. I had come here expecting a fight.

"Shit, Katie," she said wiping desperately at her eyes with the heels of her hands. "I'm sorry. You weren't supposed to see me like this."

Instead of going into the shelter of the arboretum, I stood there like a lemon in the rain. _She_ was apologising to me?

"I'm sorry," she said again, still trying to wipe her tears away.

She reached out to the bench beside her and picked up a bottle of vodka, moving to take a large swig. In a second I was stood in front of her.

"Give me that," I commanded, snatching the bottle away from her. "I'm not going to let you fuck yourself up again over me. What have you taken?"

"Nothing, yet," she answered with a teary half smile. "I couldn't seem to stop crying long enough to sort myself out."

"C'mere," I said, putting the bottle down on the floor and moving forward to wrap her in my arms. I was still stood up, but she flung her arms around my waist and pulled me to her.

"We're not going to go down that road tonight, ok?' I said.

"Ok," she murmured into my chest, and clung onto me.

I stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head as her body shook with a final few sobs.

"It's ok, Eff," I assured her. "It's going to be ok. I told him where to shove his stupid flowers. Well actually I shoved them there for him."

I felt the shudder of her laughter against me, but she still didn't relinquish her grip. The trees that were intertwined above our heads protected us from the worst excesses of the rain, and so I just let her stay there, occasionally kissing her soft brown hair.

"Are you ok, Eff?" I asked her after several minutes of silence.

"Mmmhmmm," she murmured, making me move to disentangle from the embrace.

"Are you sure?" I said. "I never wanted to hurt you like that, you know."

"I'm on Cloud Nine, in Seventh Heaven, in Paradise and Shangri Fucking La," she replied.

"You what?" I said in confusion.

"Katie, you do realise where my head is right now?" she said in a tone that told me immediately that she was smirking. "Not about to give that up in a hurry."

I had been so concerned about her state of mind that I hadn't realised that our relative seated and standing positions had left her head planted firmly against my tits.

"Pervert,' I said, pulling away, but almost instantly realising I was missing the contact.

"That was beautiful," smiled Effy, her eyes still red from her tears. "You're beautiful."

"Well you've got good taste, I'll give you that," I smiled down at her, pushing my hands through her hair. Her eyes dropped back down to my tits.

"What?" I said.

"It's just I've never been this close to them before. I was just wondering…"

"What?" I repeated.

"Can I touch them?" she said shyly.

I was the first girl in our year at school to get breasts, and the innocence of her request reminded me of all the little twelve year old boys who used to beg me to grant them the very same favour.

"Well it is your birthday, I suppose," I said.

Effy's eyes went wide with surprise, but she didn't question my answer just in case I changed my mind. Instead she slowly raised her hand and reached for me as reverently as if she had just been granted permission to stroke the Mona Lisa. The first touch of her fingers was so delicate and so sensitive, but its effect still ricocheted through the fabric of my top and into my whole of my upper body. When she gently spread out her fingers and softly explored my texture with her palm, I felt grateful that I already had my arms around her neck for support. I risked a glance down at her, and caught a face that was full of wonder and respect. Her other hand came up to join its partner and she cupped both my breasts and rested her forehead in between them. I could feel my nipples starting to harden, and she glanced her thumbs across me to feel them rise under her touch. She released one side to allow her lips to ghost against me, and I had to let my head fall back, and an involuntary 'fuck' escaped my lips as a surge of arousal flooded through my body. It was always the same the few times I had let her touch me. I found myself immersed in feelings that I never expected to have.

"You ok, Katie?" I heard her whisper, and I looked down to see her gazing up at me, her bloodshot eyes carrying a cocktail of heady lust and love. Her lips were slightly parted, and what I did next came from a place that was stronger than the fear.

I leant down and kissed her, and it was everything I remembered from before. This time I was stone cold sober, but the sensations were every bit as magical. Her lips were so incredibly soft and they danced with mine in a perfect choreography. It was a gentle exploration, soft open mouthed kisses that demanded nothing of either party. Her hands slipped away from my tits and slid down to wrap themselves around my bum as we continued to trade tentative teenage kisses for quite some time. I was still too nervous to go any further and Effy was too nervous to push, not wanting to freak me out and frighten me away. In the end it was me that deepened it. Effy had just let out a little moan into my mouth and it made me want to grab her bottom lip with my teeth and tug at it. So I did just that, eliciting an even sexier groan from her. I released her lip and moved forward again, pushing my tongue into her mouth and feeling hers flick out to meet me. Again, I reigned myself in before I lost it completely, and Effy let me keep us there, snogging sexily, but with each of us holding our raw passion at bay. I knew I couldn't keep kissing her like this forever, but I was reluctant to break the moment. She felt so good with her lips and her tongue starting tiny little fires every time they touched me, that I didn't want to let this go. I realised that all those times I had run from her weren't because I didn't feel anything for her, but because I felt too much.

Effy stood up slowly still kissing me and I felt the familiar panic rising again. I expected to feel her hands start roaming over my body. I expected her to grab my arse and pull me tight. I expected her to turn up the heat, and I was terrified I couldn't handle it. But what she did was pull away and gently cup my face.

"You kiss like a goddess," she told me.

Then she took my hands and stood and waited. She smiled at me adoringly. She was telling me that even though she had waited for me all this time, and even after what had just happened, she was happy to wait for me still. My next words were out of my mouth before my brain had a chance to process them.

"Let's go to the boat," I said.

Effy tried not to show it, but her pupils automatically widened in a mixture of arousal and surprise.

"If that's what you want." She said softly.

"I'm not promising anything," I qualified. "It's just it's getting pretty cold and damp out here."

"Whatever you want, my love," she whispered in my ear as she pulled me into a light embrace. "Whatever you want."

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"Would you like something to drink?" she offered as we walked down the steps into the cabin.

Hell yeah, I wanted a goddamn drink. I knew that coming to the boat had been my idea, but now that we were here I felt more terrified than ever. It wasn't that I didn't trust Effy, I knew she would be the perfect fucking gentleman. I didn't trust myself, and the soggy messed up soup of emotions that were haunting me.

"What have you got?" I attempted nonchalance.

"I was thinking a little champagne," smiled Effy. "Now that every fucker knows about my birthday, I guess I might as well attempt to celebrate it."

"Sounds good to me," I replied.

Once we had settled down with the champagne, Effy reached into the inside pocket of her discarded leather jacket and pulled out a bag of powder.

"Fancy a little coke to go with that?" she asked me.

"Effy Stonem, are you trying to get me wasted so you can have your wicked way with me?" I said cheekily.

"No," she said in alarm. "We don't have to if you don't want to."

I had to admit, I was slightly disappointed at her answer. She went to put the drugs away until I reached out and grabbed her wrist to stop her. A couple of drinks and a couple of lines in and the conversation was obviously starting to flow a lot more freely. We talked about all sorts of nonsense. In fact we talked about anything and everything except what was going on between us, and though I found myself really loving her company, I half wished she would just jump me and get it over with. I wished she would just take the decision out of my terrified shaking hands. But Effy was incredibly strong-willed about that. She was in this for the long game, and I think she needed to know I was coming to her willingly, and consequently she would do nothing to force my hand. Nothing that I could use as an excuse to run from her.

We were chatting about Emily and Naomi when I was suddenly seized by the need for action. I could see what my sister had with her girlfriend, and for all the men that I had shagged, the only person I could imagine being that close to was Effy.

"Scoot up, babes," I said.

Effy shimmied out from behind the table, presuming I just needed the loo or something, but as soon as we were both out in an open part of the bench seat, I surprised her by flipping myself round until I was sitting on her lap straddling her.

"Oh," she said at this new development, and I smirked down at her.

It wasn't often anyone got to surprise Effy, and it made me feel pretty good.

"Tell me who you are, Effy Stonem," I asked her.

"You know me," she replied.

"I don't know you like Emily does," I said. "I bet you tell her everything."

"Almost," said Effy, making me smile. There were ways in which I could know her which even Emily didn't.

"So I'm going to ask you some questions," I informed her. "And for each answer that I'm satisfied with, you get a kiss."

"Fire away," said Effy, grinning back up at me.

"Who's Cat?" I asked.

"She's looking up her family history," replied Effy. "We're helping her dive to find the wreck of her great granddad's boat."

She pursed her lips at me hopefully.

"No kiss for that one," I shrugged. "I said I had to be satisfied with the answer."

"And you weren't?" said Effy.

"I thought she must be something to do with that pipeline," I said triumphantly.

"Pipeline?"

"The one that you and Emily blew up," I stated confidently.

Effy's eyes widened in surprise. I was on a fucking roll tonight.

"Emily told you?" asked Effy.

"In a way," I conceded. "I can feel her you know. It has to be strong emotion, but I can sense her. That night I couldn't sleep. Naomi had already been round in a flap about you and Ems, but I told her you wouldn't cheat on me."

"Technically, I don't think it's cheating if you're not actually in a relationship," said Effy.

"Thing is I knew something was going on with Ems that night. For some reason I got the impression that she was scared, and Emily never gets scared. When I saw the news the next day, I put two and two together."

Effy looked up at me in admiration.

"You're definitely way smarter than most people give you credit for," she grinned. "Cat's a Sea Ninja, and she's here because we're going on another mission."

"Good girl," I said, and rewarded her with a sensual kiss.

Effy tried to follow me upwards when I broke it, but I put my hands on her shoulders and pushed her back down into the bench.

"Next question," she said breathlessly, and I discovered that I really enjoyed seeing her wound up like this.

"What's it like going down on a girl?" I said. "I imagine it can't be that different from blowing a guy. You know, not that great but you have to do it cause it makes them happy."

Effy's answer to that one was to burst into uproarious laughter. It took her several minutes to calm down enough to speak.

"It's completely fucking different," she grinned. "For one thing, it tastes a lot better."

"Tell me about it," I said, screwing my nose up. "Spunk tastes fucking rank."

"So you're a spitter then, Katie?" she smirked. "And you don't like sucking cock? I'm beginning to suspect you're a lot gayer than you're letting on."

"You haven't answered the question," I pouted.

"Well, I haven't had sex with another girl for nearly two years now, so I'm going on memory here, but I seem to recall it was pretty fucking beautiful. And certainly not something I would ever regard as a chore."

I kissed her again, a little deeper this time, guiltily reminded that I was the reason for her self-imposed celibacy. Which led to the next question forming itself in my head.

"Why do you love me so much?"

"For your courage, your spirit, your honesty, your fire," she said. "And your incredibly hot body, of course."

"What courage?" I said despondently. I felt like the biggest coward in the world for the way I had treated her.

"You stood up to my mother," said Effy, suddenly serious. "I'd say that was pretty fucking brave.'

"She was being an asshole," I said.

"Yeah well, most people let her be an asshole," she replied. "No scratch that, _everybody_ lets her be an asshole. They like to go on breathing."

I knew Effy's mum was a bit dodgy, but the gravitas in her tone sent shivers down my spine.

"Is she really that bad?" I asked her.

"She's worse," replied Effy.

This time when I kissed her, it wasn't for part of the game. I wanted to comfort her, and show her that I cared about her. Next to Effy's mum, Jenna seemed like a loved-up hippy.

"Why did you stay here." I asked urgently.

"For you," she replied without hesitation.

"Why me?"

"Because you saved my life," she answered with absolute sincerity. "I always knew I was different from them, and yeah, I enjoyed the money, the glamorous lifestyle and the parties, but it was at a terrible price. You gave me hope. You gave me the strength to leave it all behind."

"To come and hang out in this dump?" I said.

"To do what was right," she replied.

I kissed her again, and I kissed her deep and long. But even as I did it, I knew that she deserved so much more. I wanted to do something beautiful for her, and if her previous answers had been true, I might even enjoy it.

"Next question," demanded Effy, dazed and breathless, when I pulled away from her again. She really was fucking beautiful. I put my finger to her lips.

"No more questions," I said, kissing her again. This time I didn't stop, but merely transferred my affections to the long slender beauty of her neck. She whimpered slightly as she arched her head back, allowing me to feast more easily on her gorgeous, sweet tasting flesh. I moved slowly down her neck and kissed my way across her collar bone, delighting in the increasing raggedness of her breath. I slid my way down her body and off the bench seat until I was kneeling on the floor in front of her. I removed her boots and then slowly slid my hands under the hemline of her dress. I worked my way upwards until my fingers curled around the top of her tights. I started to tug at them and Effy braced her hands down on the seat, raising her hips slightly so I could pull her tights and pants away from her in one go. I pushed her legs apart and moved myself in between them. I curled my hands around her buttocks and dragged her forwards until she was perched at the very edge of the bench.

"Katie, what are you…?" she started, but I soon silenced her as I ran an experimental tongue along her slit. She was already soaking wet, and I found myself getting off on the fact that she wanted me so much. I grazed my tongue slowly against her flesh again. She certainly wasn't wrong about it tasting better.

"Oh fuck," she hissed, as I started to explore her further, her hips rising up to meet me. My tongue searched out her clitoris, and every fear I'd ever had seemed to fade into the distance as I discovered how I could make her moan and gasp with my actions. I experimented further. Light fast flicks, slower longer strokes, tighter circling motions, up and down, side to side. Each new thing I tried seemed to send her into a deeper frenzy. I glanced up to see her with her head thrown back, her chest rising and falling sharply, and her arms out to the side, gripping tightly onto the little brass railing that ran along the backs of the seats. I felt a sudden surge of pride that I was able to give her such obvious pleasure, and instinct drove me even deeper towards her, sucking harder on her clit and being rewarded with a glorious groan of ecstasy.

Somewhere out at sea a vicious storm was beating down onto the ocean, and we could feel the repercussions even in the safety of the harbour, as the boat began to rise and fall with the motions of the waves. It was echoed by the rising and falling of Effy's hips as she strained to give herself over to my touch. Her legs were spread wide open for me and I attacked her deliciously sodden slit with increasing vigour. Every time she cried out in pleasure, I wanted to give her more. Her raw need for me was seriously turning me on, and suddenly this was no longer just about her. I wanted, no, I _needed_ to make her come. Suddenly I could no longer detach myself emotionally or intellectually from what I was doing. Everything was about Effy and me and the beautiful thing we were making together.

I started to push her even harder, moving my tongue even faster and more frantically across her swollen clit. I grabbed hard onto her thighs to give myself more leverage, and I lost all sense of space and time, as I focussed solely on making her scream louder and harder.

"Oh God Katie, Katie,' she cried out my name as every muscle in her body seemed to be at maximum tension. Even though I had never been with a girl before, I knew she had to be close. Much more of this and she would surely explode.

And explode she did, right into my mouth. I felt another burst of wetness flowing out of her as her hips bucked wildly beneath me and she opened her throat to the heavens. The sounds of her release were the most beautiful song I had ever heard. They were a love song written just for me. I kept myself pushing against her, riding her orgasm with her until her body shuddered and her limbs went weak. In the moments it took for me to come to my senses, I was gifted with a revelation. To experience the wonder of the female orgasm for yourself is glorious enough, but to be the cause of one was nothing short of divine.

I rested my head against her thigh, and wiped my dripping chin with the back of my hand. I was totally blown away by the sheer passion and beauty of what I'd just done. I certainly understood Emily a lot better now. She was going to laugh her arse off at this for sure. After she had finished threatening to kick my head in if I ever hurt Effy that was.

"Katie?" came Effy's tentative voice from above me.

I had been so wrapped up in my own amazement, I had forgotten she might be feeling pretty vulnerable right now. It was time to show her that I'd meant every bit of it. I stood up slowly, suddenly aware that that my knees were sore and my back was stiff. I climbed back onto her lap and kissed her slowly, yet passionately. I loved the fact that she was tasting herself on my lips. It was a badge of honour, proving that I had taken her and driven her to the stars. When I pulled back to look at her, her beautiful blue eyes were full of questions, but I knew I had the one response that would silence them all.

"Take me to bed, Effy Stonem," I said.

She took me by the hand and led me to the bedroom. My body rippled with tiny shivers as she stripped me slowly, accompanying each stage with the most exquisite arrays of kisses across each portion of my newly exposed flesh. I trembled with anticipation when she finally removed her own dress, revealing her naked torso underneath. We took the time to really look at each other, filling in the gaps that years of furtive glances had failed to supply. I had always known that she was beautiful, but seeing her exposed like this was making my insides melt. I drew back from my own inquisitive gaze to see Effy's hungry eyes roaming over every inch of me. There was nothing subtle about the way her lust darkened eyes drank me in. And though I sensed that she was still holding herself back so as not to frighten me, I got the definite feeling that if I let her, she would devour me. It was a curious feeling to be so completely desired, and yet to feel so safe in her hands.

"It's time, Effy," I told her. "Come and take what's yours."

Her eyes flared with a deep dark fire, and she pulled me into a desirous kiss, at the same time walking me back towards the bed. When the backs of my knees hit the mattress, she stopped and gestured for me to climb on. She followed me, crawling up my body with deliberate intent. She kissed me hard, pushing her tongue deep into my mouth and lowered herself on top of me. Instinctively, I curled my limbs around her, loving the feel of her naked skin against mine and the weight of her pushing me down into the bed. One of her legs split mine, and she began rubbing her thigh up against me. I watched her eyes drift closed and heard a gasp of delight escape her lips as she savoured the sensation of my wetness against her leg.

"God, you're fucking beautiful," she said, gazing into my eyes whilst continuing to grind slowly against me. "You're the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on."

If my mind held any reasonable doubts, given the glamorous nature of her former lifestyle, they were shattered by the way she kissed me then. It was a kiss that burned right into me and told me that within Effy's universe, I was the most beautiful woman in the world. I felt my pussy spasm and start to tingle, and I wanted nothing more than for her to thrust herself inside of me and fuck me like a devil. But Effy wasn't ready for me yet. She licked and kissed and bit her way across my neck and shoulders, and then travelled down my arm pausing to suck on the sensitive skin inside my elbow. Again my body spasmed and my cunt cried out for her more desperately.

Effy kissed her way down my chest and then stopped, her lips hovering tantalisingly above my breast. She looked up at me with pure mischief in her eyes a she watched me arch my back and push myself towards her in an effort to make her take me.

"I've dreamed for so long about this," she whispered. "I can't quite believe I'm finally about to do it."

"Effy please," I begged her, pushing my breast up towards her face once more.

She smiled and leaned down towards me, taking my nipple in her mouth and drinking from me like a dying man at an oasis in the desert. I thought I'd been horny before, but it had nothing on the pounding furnace of animal desire that repeatedly slammed through me, as her hands and mouth played havoc with my tits, and her now well-lubricated thigh continued to push against my clit. If I didn't get her inside me soon, I would simply die.

"Fucking hell Katie, you're amazing," she told me as she licked a heart shape onto my belly. I grabbed the back of her hair and pulled her head back up so I could meet her eye to eye.

"Please Effy babes, just take me," I implored her, my voice hoarse with desire. "I need you to fuck me."

"I'll do anything you want, my love," she said, trailing her hand down my body and slipping it between my thighs. "I'll do anything for you."

She started to kiss me again, but when she pushed her fingers inside me, I accidentally bit her lip so hard I drew blood.

"Feisty,' she said, running her tongue over the wound before thrusting into me again. Once again my instincts took me over and my hips kicked up off the bed. My whole world became about increasing the glorious sensations of her fucking me. She lowered her head, and started licking and sucking at my tits again. I wrapped one hand into her hair, and pressed the other against her lower back as I tried to pull her closer and harder inside me. Her sensitive fingers explored my cunt with every thrust and I couldn't believe how fucking good she felt. She was teasing me and exciting me and stimulating me in all sorts of ways I wouldn't have dreamed possible with another girl. But Effy continued smashing my expectations into smithereens as she accelerated her addictive attentions. I wanted her so much. I wanted her to pound her way right through me and split me in two before putting me back together again. I dug my nails into her back, causing her to sink her teeth into the under side of my breast.

"I love you," she told me, as she forced herself deeper and deeper inside me.

"Tell me again," I demanded between screams as the sensations from the beautiful friction ripped through every nerve in my body.

"I love you," she told me, her body drenched with sweat and her eyes as black as night.

"Do you like fucking me, baby?" I asked her as I pushed my hips impossibly hard against her hand.

"I never want to fuck anybody else," she gasped, slamming in and out of me until I saw stars. She rocked against me violently until I felt a dark and inevitable pressure rising within me.

"I'm yours, Katie,' she promised me. "I'll always be yours."

I shattered beneath her as a tectonic orgasm came to rip me limb from limb. All my senses became jumbled and I wasn't quite sure what was happening to me, but I knew it felt fucking amazing. Just as the first wave had undone me, the second wave turned me into a lion-hearted girl, and I clawed at Effy, and grabbed onto her tightly, pushing and pushing for further sensation. I heard her screaming from the effort, and I swore harder than a bar full of sailors on a Saturday night, until we finally fell out the other side and collapsed in a tangled sweaty mess onto the bed.

We lay in silence for several minutes, too preoccupied with gasping for breath to think about anything else. Effy had her head buried in my chest. And I lay there with one arm thrown across my forehead and the other flung out to one side.

"Fuck," I said eventually, after I had rediscovered how to use my vocal chords.

"Yeah, fuck,' murmured Effy, raising her head slightly.

"Is that normal?" I asked her with a slight tone of disbelief. "Cause if it is then order me a rainbow T-shirt immediately."

"No," laughed Effy. "All other women are rubbish, and I'm the only one who will be able to satisfy you like that."

"I think you could be right," I said, reaching down to stroke her hair. She hauled herself up until her lips were hovering just above mine.

"Seriously Katie, you were… Shit, I don't have the words," she stuttered. "I never felt… I didn't… Fuck."

She stumbled to a halt and opted for kissing me instead. When she pulled back, she looked like she was on the verge of tears.

"It was beautiful, Effy," I assured her. "Truly fucking beautiful."

I rolled her on her back and kissed her deeply, before enlightening her with the thought that had been growing in the back of my mind ever since I had started to come down.

"And now I want to do it to you."

**I wrote most of these two chapters sitting on top of a gorgeous hill in the beautiful sunshine, and I've decided that I really like writing and could quite happily do it all the time. Somebody get me a literary agent….. ;-)**


	23. When You're Smiling

**This one goes out to all my Muff Monkey Massive. Never let anyone put you down, cause you are awesome just the way you are**.

**I don't own Skins, but when I met it, I knew I was in love.**

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23. When You're Smiling

Naomi

You cannot stop Effy smiling to save your life. Me and Thommo went down to the harbour a bit later that morning to give Ems some time with her friend, and for me to catch up on some sleep. The first thing that told me something was going on was when Cat greeted us at the back of the boat.

"Good morning sailors," she said breezily. "Captain Cat at your service. I shall be driving your boat for today."

"Where's Effy?" I asked before jumping to unpleasant conclusions. "Oh God, has something happened to her?"

From the state I had found Emily in last night, I wasn't expecting great things from Effy.

"Oh, something's definitely happened to her," smirked Cat.

"Is she ok?" asked Thomas.

"See for yourself," replied Cat, nodding towards the roof of the boat."

We clambered up there to find Effy lying on her back staring up at the clouds with a half empty bottle of champagne beside her. She was wearing nothing but a long T-shirt… and a beatific grin as wide as the Pacific Ocean.

"Naomi, Thomas," she said as our presence entered her consciousness. "Have some champagne. We're celebrating."

"We are?" I asked, wondering what could have effected such a miraculous transformation in the angry and aggressive coke monster I'd seen last time we went to sea. It was like she was a different woman. So ok, it was ten thirty in the morning and she was already tipsy, but this was no anguished bender. Her body seemed more relaxed than I think I've ever seen it, and her eyes were positively sparkling. She got up from where she'd been lying and gave Thomas a massive hug.

"Today is the most glorious of days," she told him. "It is a precious jewel of a day, and we must live it to the full."

My eyebrows shot up of their own accord. Effy was not one of life's spontaneous huggers, and yet here she was coming over all Gina Campbell on my ass. And all the while that dazzling smile remained plastered in place. I had seen Effy's wasted grin on more than one occasion by now, but this was a different beast entirely. This was the smile of someone whose soul was fucking dancing. As she reached out to include me in the spontaneous hugfest, it dawned on me that there was only one thing in the world that would make Effy _this_ fucking happy.

"Katie?" I whispered in her ear as she embraced me.

"Hell yeah," replied the joyous brunette, breaking away from me into a full-on arms-wide twirl. "I got Fitched."

Thomas giggled out loud. He was new to the wonderful world of Fitch puns, and clearly found them highly amusing.

"So anyway, Cat's gonna take you out today, cause I got stuff to do," smiled the effervescent Effy. I was finding it unnerving, all this unbridled delight flowing out of the usually cool and emotionless girl.

"Stuff to do or people to do?" laughed Cat from the deck below.

Effy just beamed at her. She climbed down, pulled on her boots and picked up her jacket.

"Have a beautiful day," she saluted us.

"Is that all you're wearing out?" I frowned. She was barely covered up at all.

"Easy access," she shrugged, causing me to blush despite my own spectacular shenanigans of late. She grabbed what looked like a set of car keys from the table.

"Effy, you can't drive. You're drunk," I said.

Who was I, her mother?

"Good point," she consented, before yelling at a young man with a fishing rod who was sat on the opposite jetty. "Hey Russell, wanna earn some money?"

The boy nodded enthusiastically.

"Ok, come and be my chauffeur for the day," smiled Effy. "See ya later, Science Patrol. Wishing you fish."

And with that she swept airily from the boat and headed down the jetty, with the rest of us staring into her cartoon butterfly strewn wake.

"Is she skipping?" said Thomas warily.

"I do believe she is," answered Cat.

"Jesus Fucking Christ," was my contribution to the conversation.

Our day at sea was an uneventful one. The clouds closed in again and dumped yet more rain on our heads. In between our sample taking no one stayed on deck to monitor the video. The creatures of the deep were free to go about their business unobserved as we holed ourselves up in the cabin and tried to entertain ourselves the best we could. Thomas chatted to Cat about her fake search for the imaginary wreck. It felt weird keeping things from my best friend, something I had never felt the need to do before, so I kept quiet whilst Cat span him yarns about their dives. It felt that somehow the closer to Effy you became, the more you absorbed her need for mystery. I still knew hardly anything about her, where she came from or the nature of her 'business', but I was fast coming to accept the local custom that it was best not to ask. It still disturbed me though, and when we got back to shore I couldn't get away from Thomas fast enough. I rang Emily as soon as we were in signal range and arranged to meet her over at the Fitch's. I was feeling slightly deflated from the day and I wanted back in my lovely Emily bubble. That, and I was desperate to find out the gossip on Katie and Effy. I swallowed my guilt at the fact that my association with this band of adventurous women was pulling me away from Thomas, and headed over, promising myself I wouldn't let us drift apart over this secret.

I found Emily semi-crashed out on her bed.

"Hey gorgeous," she said, making the effort to welcome me, but barely raising her head from the pillows. She looked tired, and my protective instincts snapped to attention as she tried to struggle to sitting.

"Stay right where you are," I said firmly, joining her on the bed and opening my arms for her to snuggle into. If I was honest, I had to admit I loved moments like this, moments where my superwoman revealed her human side. Her limbs were heavy as she wrapped them around me, but I cherished the weight of them as she let me be her comfort.

"Sorry Naoms, I'm just a bit wiped for some reason," she said. "Guess with the strain of last night, and then the lack of sleep. Plus those corporate dudes are really fucking demanding, I have to work twice as hard to get through to them."

"It's ok, just relax," I soothed. "Your geek is here to save you."

She sniggered into my chest, and what were solid organs and bones instantaneously liquefied inside me. For all the blazing hot sex, for all the cool heroics (and I'm not saying I minded either of those things), it was this intimacy that fuelled my dependency. I loved looking after her. I loved making her laugh. I loved being the one who saw her with her guard down. I loved just being there for her.

"I am saved," murmured a sleepy Emily. "You save me every day."

If I really was a superhero, my name would have to be The Overthinker, and my special power would be fucking myself up by never allowing myself to live in the moment. Emily's words stimulated thought processes that exploded through my synapses. Any normal person would have just gone with the snuggling and perhaps some gentle making out, but no, I had to suddenly start projecting into the future. We were past the halfway mark on our project now, and soon I _wouldn't_ be there for her. I wouldn't be able to save her every day. The thought of it was horrible. How the fuck was I going to cope without her? Without this body and this presence that had some how become so inextricably linked with mine? How would I get to sleep within the yawning chasm of my empty bed? How would I make it through the day without her smell lingering on some part of me to remind me I was loved? How would my ears adjust to a soundscape that wasn't fuelled by the delicate bass tones of her husky voice? How would I function as relativity played tricks on me, and the arrow of time slowed its inevitable progress to stretch into small eternities the days we were apart? How would…?

"I can hear that brain fucking working from here?" said Emily.

"It's nothing," I lied. "Science problem."

"Yeah?" said Emily. "Tell me all about it."

"Not that interesting really," I attempted to deflect.

"You came here to save me with geekdom," she laughed. "I demand nerdy pontificating."

"I was pondering the paradoxes of surviving an alternate universe," I said. "One that doesn't have you in it."

"What kind of freakish hell is this?" she said, sliding herself more on top of me, increasing that delicious weight of her and making me even more aware of what I was going to be missing.

"Plymouth, in a few weeks time," I said despondently. "I'm gonna miss you so much."

"It's going to be strange," admitted Emily. "Kinda gotten used to having you around."

"Like a piece of the furniture?" I conjectured, attempting some gallows humour.

"Like you're a piece of me," she answered. "A piece that's going to go missing when you're gone."

"Fuck," I sighed.

"I didn't mean to upset you," she said, concern shining deeply in her soft brown eyes.

"I just don't know what I'm going to do," I replied.

"What are you going to do?" said Emily. "In the summer, I mean. There can't be much of term time left when you get back."

"Just a couple of weeks," I said. "Then I'll have to look for a job I guess. It'd be easier to go back to Mum's and then I wouldn't have to pay rent, but I really need to get my diving up to scratch, cause there's a lot of practical modules next year, so I should probably stay in Plymouth. Fuck I don't know."

"So let me get this straight, what you need is to get some work, but at the same time be able to do more diving?"

"Yeah."

"What kind of work?"

"Anything, I guess," I shrugged.

"So you'd be fine with say, an admin job?"

"What are you getting at Emily?" I said. I could tell from the change in her demeanour that she was plotting something.

"Maeve who works in our office is going on maternity leave at the end of June," she said excitedly. "And I don't think we've got anyone to replace her yet. It's simple stuff. Answering the phones, taking bookings, sorting out payments, that kind of thing. I'm sure you could do it in your sleep."

"But isn't that like for a year or something?"

"No, she wants to come back to work as soon as she can, so it's like three months or something. I mean it's only part time, but all Fitchwater employees get access to free lessons, and I hear their diving instructor is kinda hot."

"Yeah, I heard that too. I wonder if I'll be able to pull her."

"Naoms, it's perfect," said Emily. "You'd have everything you need, and we'd get to be together. I'll ask my Dad about it."

"But where would I live?" I asked, unwilling to believe in this sudden dream of a plan. "You said yourself that it's well expensive to rent a place round here."

"With me," she said with a gentle laugh. "You'd live with me. And then I'd get to have you every night."

"I'm not sure your Mum would be too keen on that."

"I never thought I'd see the day," she grinned. "But I think she's kind of getting used to having you around."

My brain did it's usual trick of trying to present every possible future scenario of how this might blow up in my face, but try as it might, it kept getting sidetracked by beautiful images of a whole summer in the arms of my Sea Goddess, and I had to admit I couldn't find fault with her plan. Ems was trying to be cool, but I was becoming an expert at reading the subtext in her eyes, and right now they were practically screaming at me 'please say yes, please say yes, please say yes'. Resistance was useless, there was no way that I could ever hold out against those eyes. I was just about to open my mouth to speak, when there was a loud banging on the door.

"Are you shagging?" came the inimitable sound of the other feisty Fitch.

"No, we're not shagging," shouted Emily. "You're safe to come on in."

"How do I look?" asked Katie, bursting into the room.

Emily and I reluctantly raised our weary heads from the pillows.

"Wow," said Emily and I in unison.

Even on an average day, Katie made more of an effort with her looks than most of us made even for a night out, but this was Katie dressing up to the nines, and the results were breathtaking. Her hair was curled and wrapped up into some elegant twirly bun thing, with a few artfully placed strands tumbling down from it in all the right places. Her carefully applied make up was red carpet gorgeous, subtle purple shadows around her eyes that drew your gaze right into them, and a luscious full dark red temptress lipstick. She wore a dark crimson satin dress that sculpted her already impressive curves into an enchanted landscape with the power to captivate your soul. And the whole effect was perched upon a pair of vertiginous heels that would have lesser beings in need of an oxygen mask. She looked like an airbrushed high fashion photo, but she was real.

"Effy's taking me out somewhere posh for dinner," she explained. "I wanted to look nice for her."

"I don't think nice even comes into it," said Emily. "I mean, you look, just wow…"

"Yeah like wow," I repeated helpfully.

"Wow? That's all I get?" pouted Katie.

"Seriously," grinned Emily. "I don't think Effy's even going to make it as far as wow. Probably just some open-jawed staring and some drooling."

"She may even faint," I laughed.

"So you think she'll like it?" asked Katie, still insecure after three years of unbridled adoration from her girl.

"It's Effy," said Emily. "She'd like it if you turned up in a cerise tracksuit and a lime green puffa jacket, and long as it was you inside them."

Katie scowled at the image that Ems had put in her head.

"Katie, you look stunning," I said to ease her distress. "Effy's going to fall in love with you all over again. And I'm sure she'll appreciate the efforts you've gone to for her. And I'm even more sure she'll be more than willing to show you just how much."

The shy smile that crept across Katie's face told me everything I needed to know about how she felt about her recent liaisons with Effy. When Katie Fitch starts getting all coy on you, you know this shit just got serious. The feelings she had told me about were real, and now that she had let them speak they weren't about to shut up again in a hurry.

"Now go and get your girl," I continued. "But be careful. Don't let her get too close, otherwise you'll never make it to dinner. You look perfect, and I hope you have a perfect evening."

"Thanks," smiled Katie, giving us another excited twirl, until her phone rang in her bag.

"Yeah babes, I'm ready," she breathed into it. "I'll be right out. Can't wait to see you either."

Her eyes were sparkling as she looked back at us. She looked as giddy as a schoolgirl on a first date.

"Be good," said Emily, and was greeted with a sceptical gaze that said being good was the last thing on Katie's mind.

"You're really good with her," said Emily, once Katie had left. "I know she's not always the easiest person to get on with."

"We share a mutual interest," I said. "We both love you. Besides, she must be all over the place right now, confused and dizzy and excited all at the same time. I was just trying to make it easier for her."

"She doesn't seem that confused," said Emily. "In fact she seems disturbingly certain."

"It's been a long time coming," I replied.

"I love you, Naomi," said Ems. "It really feels like you belong here. Not just with me, but I can see you being a part of the family. Come on, let's go and see Dad about the job. I want you to stay here for the summer."

Rob and Jenna were curled up on the sofa together when we were downstairs, and again it struck me how closely knit this family really were, but when I looked at the dark haired woman in front of me, I felt nervous about whether she would ever really accept me. Emily was aware of it too, as she went straight for her more liberal parent.

"Dad, have we found anyone for Maeve's job yet?" she asked him.

"Oh no, I need to get onto that," he said. "Thanks for reminding me. Do you have anyone in mind?"

"How about, Naomi?" suggested Emily, with a look she must have perfected over the years for wrapping her Dad round her little finger.

"I need a summer job when term finishes," I told him.

Rob was nodding his head, as he weighed up the idea.

"Oh, I'm not so sure," piped up Jenna, pulling herself up to a sitting position. "I think we need someone experienced."

"Mum, Naomi's fantastically intelligent," said Ems. "She could probably do the job in her sleep."

"Well, will she be able to handle the computer system?" frowned Jenna.

"Mum," laughed Emily. "She has just designed an incredibly advanced modelling programme that can project the results of her study, and predict the levels of pollution as affected by the currents for years to come. I think she can handle our booking system."

"Brains as well as beauty," grinned Rob. "I think you might want to hang on to this one, Emsy."

"I do," she said, sitting on Rob's knee and putting her arms around his neck, working the daddy's little girl angle like a charm. "Hence the wanting to keep her around."

"Smart move, Emsy. The job's yours, Naomi. Welcome to Fitchwater."

"Thanks Dad," beamed Emily, kissing him on the head.

"Is this really such a good idea?" insisted Jenna.

"Look love," said Rob patiently. "I know you still struggle with the fact that Emily likes girls, but she does, and that's it. I can tell that this one's special. I mean, how could you object to anyone who puts that kind of smile on our little girl's face?"

I had to smile myself. Emily did look radiantly happy.

"But it's business, Rob" persisted Jenna. "I mean what if they fall out, or something?"

"We're not going to fall out," said Emily kindly. "She's amazing and kind and wonderful, and I love her."

"You love her?" said Jenna curiously, as if this was something she had not come across before.

"I do," replied Emily enthusiastically.

"Well then, congratulations, I suppose," sighed Jenna.

Emily leapt off her Dad's knee, and went to give Jenna a hug.

"Just give her a chance, Mum," said Emily. "I'm going to be with her for a while."

Jenna eyed me up and down carefully before she spoke again.

"Well, if she's your partner then you should invite her to the next family dinner," she said.

"Thank you," I said simply, trying not to react to the sheer amazement in Rob and Emily's eyes. Evidently this was some huge leap forward for Jenna, and I wanted her to feel ok about it. I watched her crawl back into her husband's arms as Emily and I left the room. Despite her prejudices, Jenna was a woman who understood love, and maybe that would be her salvation.

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Another woman who understood love was stood next to me at the wheel of her boat, her features still set alight by the smile that hadn't left her face for three days. Last night the four of us girls and Thomas had gone to the arts centre in Swansea to watch some deep and meaningful Argentinean film that Effy and Emily had wanted to see for ages. It was beautiful and yet inevitably tragic. Emily had cried, and even Katie, once she had stopped bitching about the subtitles, had been visibly moved. As we came out afterwards, each one of us was in a somber and reflective mood. All apart from Effy who simply held Katie's hand and appeared to drift along on little pink fluffy clouds, beaming from ear to ear. A whole menagerie of cats could have occupied a cream-making factory and yet they would not have looked a fraction as happy as the brunette seemed to be. Effy had found a new drug, and she was indulging in it even more wantonly than she had consumed the raft of chemicals that had previously sustained her. All at once she managed to look stunned at her good fortune, smugger than a banker on bonus day, and overflowing with a childlike wonder at her brave new world.

This morning Thomas and I had had to wait for twenty minutes of the back deck of the boat for our radiant captain to deign to join us. It wasn't unusual for Effy to still be in bed when we turned up, but I was used to just going on down to the cabin to wake her up. This morning, however, it only took a few seconds of hearing Katie's screams and filthy mouthed exhortations of what she wanted her lover to do to her, to make me turn on my heels and bundle Thomas back up the stairs, where we were forced to listen to the muffled but still unmistakable sounds of viscerally abandoned sex until Effy finally appeared, once again wearing very little apart from her shit-eating grin.

"Sorry," she said, not sounding sorry at all. "You know how it is."

Thing was, I did. I too had been caught in the clutches of an irresistible Fitch. Moments later, Katie emerged with wild hair and not much else on, and she wobbled a little bit when she walked.

"Babes, come back to bed," she growled. "I'm not done with you yet."

"Can't," said Effy apologetically. "Got to go to sea."

"Bollocks," said Katie, catching sight of me and Thomas grinning sheepishly at her, desperately trying to erase the images that the recent earthy soundtrack and her dishevelled appearance had conjured in out heads.

"Do you have to?" she pouted appealingly at Effy. "It's my day off. I wanted to spend it with you."

She tugged at Effy's T-shirt and pulled her into a kiss. A kiss that was filled with promise. Thomas and I were fucked.

"Can't mess up their data, honey," said Effy breathlessly. "It's important."

"You're so good," said Katie proudly. "Always saving the world and shit."

"Come with us," said Effy "We can save the world together."

Effy's current version of saving the world appeared to involve staring at Katie sunbathing on a sunlounger in a bikini, whilst paying scant attention to where she was going.

"Effy, are we on the right course?" I asked her, frowning at her instruments.

"Huh?" said Effy dreamily, still smiling at her curvaceous lover.

"Effy," I said, resorting to waving my hand in front of her face. "We're going the wrong way."

"What?" she blinked, looking down at the controls. "Oh shit, yeah."

Effy turned the wheel, and the lines on her navigation systems aligned themselves again.

"Sorry," she smirked. "Got a bit distracted."

"Yeah, I spotted that one," I said, shaking my head. "Want some coffee to help you focus?"

"Sweet," she replied.

When I returned several minutes later, I found her in exactly the same position, gazing adoringly at the woman on the front of the boat, her hands gripping the wheel but paying no mind to where it was guiding us. Jesus, even fucked off her head on coke she was more competent than this. We were never going to get there at this rate.

"You're fucking it up again," I said in frustration.

Her eyes snapped back round to me and she started to laugh.

"You're right," she said, abandoning the wheel. "You'll have to drive."

"What? No. I can't drive this thing," I said in alarm, grabbing at the wheel in panic anyway.

"Sure you can," she assured me. "Just line this up with this and Bob's your Uncle."

Without a second glance she wandered off and left me to it, going to kneel down beside Katie. I glanced at them occasionally in between keeping my eyes riveted to the navigation device, and once my initial terror had worn off, I found myself softening to the sight before me. The pair of them looked so incredibly in love as they laughed and joked together, hands drifting lightly over each other's skin. They had an infectious chemistry that bubbled up out of them and released itself into the atmosphere, making the world a happier place. I was surprised to witness an incredible tenderness between them too, and realised that Effy's indelible smile was not just about getting laid, it was about finally being able to reach the one person who made sense of her world. I couldn't stay angry at her. It had taken me only a week to get Emily into my bed. I tried to imagine what it would be like if it had taken three years, and decided I couldn't deny Effy that goofy smile a second longer.

On the way back I was sitting looking through the days captures on fish tv with Thomas, when Katie came to join us. She looked at us with a serious intent in her eyes.

"How do you know when you love someone?" she asked.

"When you suddenly find that they're in your heart every moment of the day," smiled Thomas, and I knew he was thinking about Pandora. "When your whole body feels like it is glowing the moment they walk into a room. When the tiniest everyday thought about them makes you smile inside. When you look into the future, and you see them holding out their hand to take you there. When sex becomes a conversation that tells you truths only the two of you can share. When you realise that knowing them has finally allowed you to know yourself."

"Deep shit, Thommo," laughed Katie.

"The deepest," he replied.

"So when did you know you were in love with Emily?" she asked turning to me.

"The moment I saw her," I admitted.

"Really?" she questioned.

"Crazy, I know," I said. "But true. I can't explain it, but I know it was real. She moved me, and I knew I would never be the same again."

"Is it always like that?" frowned Katie. "So instant?"

"I think it's different for everyone," I shrugged.

It's not like I was an expert or anything. It had only happened to me once.

"Sometimes love smacks you in the face and knocks you flying," I said. "Other times I think it just creeps up on you."

"Like a ninja," winked Katie, with a conspiratorial glint in her eye.

I laughed when I realised she was in on the secret. Sometimes she hid it well, but Katie was no fool.

"Yeah, like a ninja," I said.

Katie got up and walked to the prow of the boat. She stared out at the shifting oceans for a moment, before taking a deep breath and turning round.

"Effy Stonem," she yelled above the noise of the Catherine the Great cutting through the waves. "Effy Stonem, I love you. I fucking love you, yeah?"

Effy abandoned her post at the helm in an instant, and practically leapt across the deck towards her. I watched as she flung herself into her lover's arms and they kissed frantically on the brow of the speeding boat, the wind whipping their hair around them. I allowed myself a moment to gaze upon the romantic movie scene playing itself out in front of me, before slowly turning to Thomas.

"Guess that'll be me driving again," I smirked.

Like every good Fitch, Katie's thoughts turned to food the moment we hit shore and she suggested that we all go down the pub for dinner. Her idea met with little resistance, and I texted Emily to let her know our plans.

"Already there," came the reply, complete with little winky smile.

I knew she'd had her last class with the corporate bods today, and was probably in the mood for celebrating. The thought of her getting happily drunk whilst celebrating her freedom made me smile inside. Yep, I was undeniably in love.

There was a definite ripple of interest the moment we walked into the pub. I looked around, and you could see people whispering to each other and nodding in our direction. Some of them were trying to be subtle, but some of them were downright bleeding obvious. I looked back at Katie and Effy as the wheels of the village gossip machine whirred frantically all around them.

"Ignore them, babe," said Effy soothingly, but at the same time releasing her hold on Katie's hand.

"The fuck I will," said Katie, grabbing it back and kissing it.

She marched over to the bar, and much to everyone's surprise she clambered onto a barstool and kept going till she was standing on top of the bar glowering down at the rest of us. All conversations ground quickly to a halt as every person in the pub turned to look at her. She eyed them with an evil grin.

"Now much as though you all know I love being the centre of attention," she said. "The wind from all your flapping tongues could blow a ship off course. So listen very carefully, cause I'll say this only once. Yes, Effy and I are shagging. And you can congratulate me later, cause I am one lucky bitch, but there's no need to work yourselves into a frenzy about it. I fell in love, and that's all there is to it. Thank you, and have a wonderful evening."

"Fuck yeah, Katiekins," yelled Cook, leading a round of applause that soon scattered round the pub.

"Now _that_ was coming out in style," said Emily, suddenly by my side and gazing proudly up at her sister.

"She doesn't do things by halves, does she?" I said, slipping my arm round Emily's waist.

"I don't think she's even aware of the existence of halves," grinned Emily.

"What's going on? What did I miss?" asked Freddie, ambling up to us a few moments later stinking of weed.

"Looks like Emily's army's got a new recruit," laughed Huw, the old guy from the harbour who had told us about Bob's accident. Otherwise known as Mr Tactful. Not.

"What do you mean?" frowned Freddie.

"Effy and Katie," said Huw. "They're having it away, so they are."

Freddie's pint went crashing to the floor as he looked over to where Effy was helping Katie down from the bar.

"Steady on lad," said Huw. "I know it's a sexy image and all that, but there's no need to go wasting good lager over it."

Effy's head had turned round at the sound of splintering glass, and now her penetrating blue eyes had locked with Freddie's. Her special Katie smile spread slowly back across her face, but there was no malice in it. It was the first time I had seen her look at him without hate. She didn't need it any more. She had won. She turned back and kissed her girl to a chorus of cheers from the rugby boys in the corner. The love triangle of doom had been irrevocably smashed apart, and Freddie was the collateral damage. I saw his eyes fill with tears, and he turned and bolted from the pub. Emily watched him go, before she turned back to me questioningly.

"Go," I said. "He's going to need someone."

"Are you really taking over the world," Cook asked me cheekily. "Cause when Katie Fitch goes down, you know we're in trouble."

"Oh, she's been going down," I said smuttily, causing Cook's eyes to roll back into his head at the thought of it.

"We're doomed," he laughed. "Doomed, I tell you."

"Hey," I said, spreading my hands out towards him. "With the Cookie Monster out there, I'm sure there's always hope."

Cook laughed his infectious irreverent laugh.

"I've always like you, Blondie," he grinned.

"There's only one thing this situation calls for," I said with faux seriousness.

Cook's eyes flashed as he cottoned on.

"TEQUIIIIIIIILLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAA!" he yelled to the rafters.

I had a feeling it was going to be a messy night.


	24. Love Is A Riot

**Hello loves. Some new fics you might want to consider reading – 'Some people have real problems' by BlueEyedFrog – a tasty something for all you eco art freaks out there, 'Drifting Blues' by funnypain, cause it's a slow burning piece of gorgeousness, and of course no Effy fan should be without 'Heart of Stone' by lizardwriter - *****goes to the happy place***** Oh, and of course, this one ;-)**

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24. Love Is A Riot

Emily

It took a long time and an industrial amount of weed for Freddie to calm down. If I had a pound for every time I had chased someone out of this pub over this bloody love triangle, I would be a very rich woman indeed. But it was over now. Of all the scenarios I had envisaged for the end of this era, the one that had finally played itself out was the one that I had least expected. Although I knew Effy would never have fallen for the distraught young man in beside me, I thought that maybe one day he might see the light, and go for the available girl instead of the one that hated his guts. That, or they would all just drift away from each other and find other partners. I had honestly never thought that Katie would embrace the rainbow flag with such enthusiasm. Indeed it was his own enduring faith in Katie's unshakable heterosexuality, and her consequent denial of Effy, that had been keeping Freddie afloat, but without that rock to cling to, the poor guy was drowning.

"Oh God, I'll never have her now," he wailed through his tears. "Not now she's got Katie where she wants her."

"Freddie," I said softly, for the umpteenth time. "You never were going to have her. She only ever saw Katie."

"But Katie didn't want her," sighed Freds. "And I thought, well, you know. I'm a good person, and I love her. It should make a difference when someone loves you, shouldn't it? I thought maybe one day she could come to see that, and let me look after her."

Maybe now wasn't the best time to remind him that however waif like she might look on the outside, Effy came from a family of killers and did not need anyone to play protector.

"Maybe that's exactly what Katie came to realise," I said.

We must have talked round in circles for at least a couple of hours, sat on the bench beside the duckpond, before Freddie eventually stopped crying. I hugged him, and listened to him and watched him attempt to drug himself into oblivion. It was strange after all the times I been in this position with Effy over him. Over the years it had sometimes been hard to maintain my neutrality, and not get sucked into Effy's contempt after seeing the pain she had suffered at his innocent hands. But in this time and this place, it was Freddie who was a human being in pain, and I can never stop myself from wanting to help people. Effy was hardly being discreet in her triumph, and what with Katie carrying on like a one woman Pride Parade, Freds was going to need a lot of support. There was nowhere for him to escape in our tiny claustrophobic life, and he was going to have to watch them being in love, and try to find a way to cope with it. I suspected the corresponding increase in Effy's weed sales was going to keep Katie in shoes for the rest of the year.

"Do you want to go back to the pub?" I asked him eventually.

"No, I think I'm just going to go home," he sighed. "I'm tired, and I don't think I can face everyone just yet."

"Well, don't go all stoned hermit on us, yeah?" I told him. "And if you need someone to talk to, just call me."

"Why are you being so nice to me, Emily?" he asked. "I thought you would have been celebrating with your best mate."

"Someone was always going to get hurt over this," I sighed. "And I'll be honest with you, Freddie. I'm glad it's not Effy or my sister, but I'm not so cruel that I actually _want_ you to feel like this. The whole thing sucks, but there was never going to be a neat solution. You're a good looking guy, I'm sure when you've had some time to recover there'll be loads of cute girls interested in you."

"Effy could have had anyone she wanted," countered Freddie. "But she never faltered, did she? She never lost her faith."

I didn't answer. I didn't think I had the strength to start the whole fucking cyclical conversation again. There was no easy fix for this, and Freddie's healing was going to be a long time coming.

"Anyway, I've kept you long enough," he smiled weakly. "Don't you have your own gorgeous girl to get back to?"

"If you're sure you're ok?" I said hesitantly.

"I'll manage for now," he shrugged, and started trudging towards home.

After a few steps he stopped and turned back towards me.

"Thanks Emily," he said. "You're a good person. I hope Naomi appreciates you."

"She does," I smiled, and headed in the opposite direction.

There were still cars in the car park by the time I got back, but the pub itself looked dark. It wasn't as if they had a set closing time. The restaurant stopped serving at nine, but after that they pretty much closed when they felt like it. I was just about to call Naomi to see what the crack was, when the front door opened to let some stragglers out.

"Hey Emily," called Megan, as soon as she saw me.

She was the landlords' daughter, and they were away for the week, leaving her in charge.

"Come on in, love," she said. "Everyone's in the back room."

As soon as I went through the door, I could tell that my first impressions had been wrong. The main lounge of the pub was indeed empty, but the air was thick with the sound of a crowd and a thudding bass coming from the back room.

"What you 'aving?" asked Megan, as she made her way to the door that would take her back behind the bar. "I think you're going to need it."

"Pint of cider," I said, before heading warily towards the noise.

The scene that greeted me when I tugged at the door was like something from one of those post apocalyptic movies where everyone has gone feral, except they still manage to find hair dye for their Mohicans and electricity for their badass sound systems. It was the blast of heat and noise that hit me first, and then the blurry motions of the dancing and frolicking revellers. I blinked and took a deep breath before I could begin to analyse the chaos. The pub's little lighting system, more used to the sedate tones of the occasional wedding reception had been turned up to the max, and was flashing away like it had been set free after years of incarceration for a crime it didn't do. Thomas had plugged his iPad into the sound system and was mixing tunes like a pro. The room was full of adventurous locals of all ages, and a few bewildered yet excited looking tourists and some of the surf crew who were camping up at Llangennith. Everyone was smiling, shouting, leaping and yes, I have to say it, writhing. Naomi and Cook were dancing with each other on the tables. Both of them had their tops off, Cook down to his naked torso and Naomi down to her bra. Effy was on the tiny stage with a microphone in her hand singing, fuck me _singing_, to Katie who was being carried round the room on the shoulders of the rugby boys. The tune was some mental dubstep mash-up of that old tune 'Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You," and every time Effy got to the "I love you, baby' chorus, she was joined by the raucous howlings of the whole fucking room. Megan had been right, I was going to need that pint.

I put my head down and made a beeline for the bar, where Megan had my pint waiting for me. I downed half of it in one before paying her and turning to the one person in the room who could probably tell what the fuck was going on. Sat on a bar stool looking very chilled was a smirking, yet sober-looking Cat.

"What the fuck is this?" I asked her, as Jonno paraded past us with a pair of ladies knickers on his head.

"It's a party," smiled Cat.

"I can see that," I said, as I watched one of the surfer boys doing handstands on the pool table. "What's it doing here?"

"I guess Effy's celebrating," shrugged Cat. "She's been giving out free drugs like they were sweets."

Well that would explain some of the chaos. There was a breakdown in the music, and a section of the crowd started chanting in Cook's direction.

"What do we want? What do we want? What do we want?"

In response, Cook stopped dancing and raised his arms to the sky.

"What do we want?" he asked. "What do we want, Naomikins?"

"WE WANT TEQUIIIIILLLAAAAAA!" yelled my semi-naked girlfriend, and everyone in the room went wild.

Before I knew it, Megan had thrown two bottles into the crowd, and they were passed hand over hand to the two reprobates on the table. Naomi and Cook grabbed a bottle each, and clinked them together before ripping the caps off. Everyone surged forward with shot glasses in their hands and the perpetrators filled them up. When everyone had found themselves some liquor, Naomi instigated a countdown.

"Five, four, three, two, one, SHOT!" she screamed, and everyone downed their glasses, whilst she and Cook slugged straight from the bottles. Thomas cranked the tunes back up, and the mayhem continued anew. I watched as the lads deposited Katie into the arms of her lover, and the pair of them collapsed into each other laughing the laugh of the truly free.

"Fuck's sake," I huffed at Cat. "Nobody turned the pub into Thunderdome when I came out."

"Emily," called Megan, dragging my attention back to the bar. "Effy said if you showed up to give you this."

She handed me a glass plate with a wrap and a couple of pre-racked lines on it.

"So, you're cool with this?" I said with a raised eyebrow, as I took the gift.

"Are you kidding?" grinned Megan. "I'm making a fucking fortune. Mum'll be gobsmacked when she gets back. She'll let me take charge more often, and then we'll have some times. We don't exactly have to tell her _why_ everyone drank so much, do we now?"

She winked at me and turned back to serving the customers clamouring at the bar. Oh well, when in a bacchanalian post-apocalyptic netherworld, do as the post-apocalyptic bacchanalians do, I suppose. I snorted up one of the lines of coke, and offered the plate to Cat.

"Not for me," she smiled back at me.

"Drink?" I shrugged.

"I'm good," she said happily.

"You know, for a hardcore activist and all round international badass, you're pretty clean living," I told her.

"I don't exactly have a choice," she replied.

"How come?"

"I got sick a while back," she said casually. "Very sick. Nearly died a few times. Ended up with a few borrowed bits in me that wouldn't take too kindly to toxins."

"Oh God, I'm sorry," I said, feeling suddenly guilty about attempting to foist my vices upon her.

"Don't be," she said so calmly, you could almost imagine she was kind of high. "I'm still standing, and now every day is precious. When you've been through something like that, you can just get off on life. And this…"

She opened her arms to the revellers as if absorbing their joy.

"This is some kind of hootenanny."

"I keep expecting devils to start emerging from the cellar," I grinned.

"I'll keep an eye out for that," said Cat. "Meanwhile, I think you should go and rescue your girlfriend before she loses anymore clothing."

I looked over to where Naomi was twirling her T-shirt round her head, and Cook's hands were getting a little too wandery for my liking.

"EMILIO!" shouted Cook, as soon as he saw me.

"My beautiful love," exclaimed Naomi with equal enthusiasm. "I've missed you my red goddess. Come and give me a kiss."

As soon as I was close enough, they grabbed an arm each and pulled me up onto the table between them.

"Too many clothes," frowned Naomi, tugging at the hem of my top. "You should take this off."

"Maybe later," I said, before Cook could stick his oar in. "Let's dance."

"Yeah, let's dance," said my shitfaced honey, pulling me to her and starting to grind.

"An excellent idea," said Cook, and came up behind me, sandwiching me between the two of them and joining in the fun.

"You're so fucking beautiful," said Naomi.

Her hot breath in my ear, and her bra clad breasts moving against me, made me forget where I was. She easily drew me into an open-mouthed kiss, which became more passionate by the second. The scenes of wild abandon all around us only fuelled our fire, and my inhibitions started melting in its heat.

"Fuck, you're gorgeous," I said, my hands starting to drift unbidden over her exposed flesh, and the cocaine buzzing round my head starting to put all kinds of filthy ideas into my head, until I got a nasty wake up call, poking into my arse.

"Cook!" I rounded on him.

"What?" he grinned, a picture of innocence.

"Your cock," I said dismissively.

"What about it?" he said.

"Stop poking me with it," I growled. "I don't want it."

"Everybody wants my cock, babe," insisted Cook.

"I don't," said Naomi over my shoulder.

"See," I said.

"My GOD, that's a massive boner," exclaimed Naomi, staring at the bulge in Cook's trousers.

I didn't want to look, but somehow I couldn't stop my eyes from drifting downwards.

"Jesus Cook, did you plant a tree down there or something?" I gasped.

"What's a man to do?" he said, completely unashamed at his very public erection. "I got two of the world's finest females getting all hot and bothered with each other just inches away from me. Nature's gonna take its course."

"Well we can't let that go to waste," giggled Naomi turning to the crowd. "Hey! Anybody need a shag? Cook's got wood."

"Oooh, me, me, me," said Bobby Tan, the son of the family who owned the take away in the next village, waving his hand in the air and jumping up and down.

"Steady on, Bobby," laughed Cook. "I'm not that fucking drunk."

Seconds later, he was dragged from the table by Stella Pemberton, a strikingly attractive blonde in her late thirties. She was a rich lawyer from Birmingham, a second homer who had a cottage not to far from Naomi's. Normally she came down here with her husband, but two weeks ago she turned up here on her own, and every time she came out her eyes were red from crying.

"How about it big boy?" she said. "Wanna help me drown my sorrows?"

"Fuck yeah," said Cook, as ever a willing sinner.

I decided I'd had enough of table dancing, and really fancied another pint. I jumped down and then turned to catch Naomi who tumbled more than stepped down from its heights.

"Lil bit mashed," she smirked at me, attempting to kiss me on the nose but somehow missing and slobbering into my eye. Good job I fucking loved her.

"No shit Sherlock," I said. "Cook is a seriously bad influence on you."

"Yeah, but he's SO much fun," she beamed.

My attempts at a fake severity were doomed form the start. Truth was, I loved seeing her like this. Just like geeky Naomi, sleepy Naomi, shy Naomi and half a dozen other manifestations of my love, wasted Naomi was unfeasibly adorable. I knew her brain spent too much of its time working on overdrive, and it filled my heart to watch her throwing her cares away and just letting go. Her eyes were shining as she steadied herself against me and I wallowed in their magnificent blueness, as if I was diving into a pool filled with sapphires.

"I'm so fucking happy right now," she told me. "I think I might just be the happiest fucking girl in Wales."

"Dunno," I said. "I think you might have some competition."

I turned her round to face the bar, where Effy was standing on top of it with her back to us, arms out in a crucifix position. She let herself fall backwards until she was caught by the crowd, and travelled held aloft on their arms, eyes closed and drifting on the sensation, her permasmile grown even bigger on her face.

"Fuck that's cool," said Naomi in awe. "I wanna do that."

Before I even had time to blink, she was off again, surging through the throng to try to emulate Effy's stunt. I let her go. Naomi deserved every ridiculous bit of happiness she could get. I thought about what Cat said, and she was right. Every moment was precious. There was something looming over us that could change everything. Something we'd been playing at the past couple of weeks, but which we were going to have to face at some point soon. I know I had reconciled it with Naomi, but now maybe Effy would be the one to have second thoughts. The party raged on around me, but for some reason I couldn't lose myself in it like everyone else. Freddie's sadness and my own sense of foreboding were keeping me on edge. I saw Katie sat on the edge of the stage, and wandered over to her.

"Hey little sis," she said, holding her arm out to wrap round me as I sat next to her.

"How's it going?" I asked her.

"I'm not sure," she said. "But I think I might be having the most fun I've ever had in my life."

"Spontaneous parties are always the best," I laughed. "And this is some party."

"I think my girlfriend might have something to do with that," she said, before collapsing in a fit of giggles.

"What's so funny?"

"I have a girlfriend," she said carefully, as though still getting used to the sound of the word in her mouth.

"And how's that going for you?"

"Like this," she said, gesturing to the glorious mayhem all around us. "This is how it feels. It's a fucking riot."

I looked up just in time to see Naomi stage-diving head first off the bar into the waiting arms of the crowd.

"That good, huh?" I smiled.

"Where'd you disappear to anyway?"

"Freddie," I replied. "He's not taking it too well."

"Stupid boy," said Katie, but there was no malice in her voice. "He should have known he was never going to get her. He should have given up and moved on."

"That's what I kept telling Effy," I smiled.

Next thing I knew, Katie had punched me in the arm.

"What?" I frowned at her, rubbing the sore spot.

"You told her to give up on me," said Katie crossly.

"I didn't know you were going to have a sudden revelation," I complained. "I hated seeing her hurting over you, I thought I was trying to help her. She never fucking listened to me anyway. She never gave up on you, not even for a second.

"That's because she knew," said Katie. "Effy always knows. It's not like it was for Freddie, because I liked her back. I liked her for so long, Ems, but I was just too fucking scared to admit it. And I hurt her for no reason. I screwed things up for myself, and now I've hurt Freddie too. I wish I had been brave like you. You never let anyone else's idea of you fuck you around."

I realised then that I had let my friendship with Effy take something from me. That there were whole sides to my sister I didn't even know anymore. Maybe now I would start to get her back.

"So why now?" I asked her, taking hold of her hand.

"When I found her at the church, she was crying. Proper full on uncontrollable crying. I had never seen her like that, and I'd grown used to her fucking attitude. But she was in bits, and it broke my heart when I realised I was the cause of that. I just wanted to look after her. And then when we went back to the boat, we were talking about you and Naomi. I remember making some crack about having to sort Naomi out if she ever hurt you, and Effy just scoffed 'as if I'd ever let anyone hurt Emily.' And that's when I knew, she didn't just care about me, she cared about everything that was precious to me. She still made me feel the way I felt all those years ago when she first used to write to me. I realised that there was no fucking perfect Prince Charming waiting out there for me, because she was right here under my nose. So, I did something about it."

"I had no fucking idea," I said, shaking my head. "That's a hell of a story."

"It's a hell of a happy ending," smiled Katie.

Just then Princess Charming herself, staggered over towards us.

"Wow," she said spacily. "My two favouritist, most gorgeousist, brilliantest women in the world. Come and dance with me."

She grabbed us by the hand and dragged us both to our feet, pulling us into a lazy embrace. But the idea of the three of us dancing quickly faded into Effy and Katie becoming ever more intimate and leaving me out of the picture altogether, as their mouths became locked together and their hands started sliding around each others curves. I decided to leave them to it and go in search of my own princess. I was trying to make my way through the throng, when a girl turned round suddenly in front of me and we all but collided, causing her to spill the drinks she was carrying over her hands.

"Shit," she said, putting the pints down on the nearest table and trying to shake the drips from her fingers.

"I'm sorry," I said anxiously.

"No worries," she smiled back at me. "Accidents will happen, especially in this place."

The first thing I noticed was the Australian accent. And then the gorgeous green eyes, the messily cut bob of natural auburn hair, the toned upper arms of an athletic body, and the cute little smile. Emily Fitch, you are a bad fucking girl.

"I guess," I said lamely.

"Yeah well, I think I've managed to lose most my of dignity. I don't think losing half a pint of beer is gonna add up to much in the grand scheme of things tonight."

"It's not always like this," I said to the stranger. "Mostly dull as dishwater."

"So you live round here?" she asked me.

"Yeah, I teach surfing at the Fitchwater watersports place," I replied.

"Yeah," said the girl, a little more coyly. "I've seen you on the wave. You look pretty good."

"Yeah well, you know," I said dismissively, not wanting to seem arrogant.

"I'm staying up at Llangennith at the campsite. Maybe we should ride together sometime. Girl power and all that. Show the boys how it's done."

It was always nice to surf with other girls, and I was contemplating her offer, when Naomi came riding up towards us on Jonno's back.

"Woah, mighty steed," she cried, and Jonno stopped, making appropriately horse like noises as he did so. I couldn't help but giggle. The pair of them looked ridiculous. At least he'd taken the pants off his head.

"I challenge you to a duel," Naomi slurred at the Australian.

"What?" said the red head, understandably confused.

"You madam, are a thief," said Naomi, jumping from Jonno's back. "And I challenge you to a duel."

"I'm not a thief," countered the girl.

"I put it to you that you are," smiled Naomi manically. "I put it to you that you are attempting to take something from me."

"Why would I be doing that? I don't even know who you are."

"I am Sir Naomi of Bristol…. Slash Plymouth, and you…."

Naomi attempted to point at the girl, but she was having trouble focussing.

"You are trying to steal the heart of my lady," she grinned triumphantly.

I stared at my wobbly blonde avenger and my heart burst wide open, leaking slushy gushy liquid soppiness all over me.

"God, I fucking love you," I told her.

"Yay!" she said sweetly, waving her hands in the air, before lurching forwards and trapping me into a big sloppy kiss.

"She wants to shag you, Ems," she nodded, in a charmingly failed attempt to look serious.

"Not going to happen," I assured her. "You're the only girl for me."

A smile every bit as huge as the one Effy had been wearing for the last three days, exploded across Naomi's face. She turned towards the Aussie chick.

"Mine" she mouthed, tapping herself on the chest. "But I'll let you off the whole duel thing, because my lady's heart is true."

By this time my would-be suitor was smiling too.

"Your girlfriend's cute," she winked at me. "And she was right. But far be it from me to interfere with true love. I'll leave you ladies to it. Maybe, I'll catch you out on the wave sometime."

"Sweet," I said as she waved goodbye.

"Phew," said Naomi, grabbing onto Jonno's shoulder for support. "I'm glad I didn't really have to fight her, cause I don't think I'd be very good at it right now."

The last bit was delivered in a conspiratorial whisper, as if she was actually good at fighting the rest of the time. She was so fucking cute I wanted to eat her up.

"You wanna go home, babe?" I asked her.

She frowned, as if seriously trying to weigh up he pros and cons.

"You gonna be nekkid?" she asked me finally.

"I think that could probably be arranged," I laughed.

"Then yes," she said decisively.

"Cool, where's your top?" I asked her.

She looked down at her bra clad torso as if realising she was semi-naked for the first time, and then patted herself down as if looking for the elusive item of missing clothing.

"Hmmm" she said finally. "Not sure."

"Did you have a jacket?"

"Nope," she said, shaking her head goofily.

Well that was walking home out of the question then, and I was reluctant to subject poor Asif to the temptation of Naomi's flesh. And then I remembered Cat. Non-drinking, non drug-using Cat, who was about to become my toxin-free best friend. As we made our way out to her car, Naomi wrapped her arms around our shoulders and serenaded us with a little song she'd just concocted.

"I'm going to shag my pretty Emileee

She won't shag the surfer, cause she wants to shag me…"

.

.

.

Of course she passed out in the back of the car before we even got home. And she was still passed out when I left to go to sea the next morning. I met Cat at the boat and she already had the coffee on.

"Effy's on her way back," she said. "She had to take Katie to work."

"Oh God, I bet that went down well."

We finished off two pots of coffee and a couple of rounds of toast before Effy reappeared.

"How is she?" I asked her.

"Slumping miserably on the counter of the shop as we speak," smirked Effy. "I pity any customer who dares to disturb her."

"How come you're looking so fresh faced?" asked Cat. "You were completely off your head last night."

"Training," shrugged Effy. "I put in _a lot_ of practice."

There was no indication that today was going to be any different from any of the other days we had messed around at sea constructing our alibi until we reached our destination, when instead of getting ready for a dive, Cat called us round the table.

"I've had a message from Stingray," she said. "They want to start repairs on the pipeline now that the police investigation is over. Our window of opportunity has arrived. If we're going to do this, it has to be next week."

Effy and I stayed silent as the implications of her words sank in. We weren't playing any more. Shit just got serious.

"Emily? Are you still in?" said Cat.

I thought about everything I talked with Naomi about that day at the lagoon.

"Yeah," I said. "I'm in."

"Effy?" said Cat. "I know things have changed for you in the last week. If you're having any doubts, then now's the time to air them."

"I love her _so_ much," said Effy. "The thought of being without her now is almost incomprehensible."

"It's ok," said Cat, putting her hand on Effy's arm. "I understand."

"I don't think you do," replied Effy, a hint of pure steel in her voice that brought out echoes of her mother. "We have to do this, not in spite of the fact that we have people that we love, but _because_ of them."

She was right. A better world was possible, and we all had someone we wanted to share it with. It was time.

"Right then Ninjas," said Cat. "Time to get our stealth on."


	25. It's The Waiting I Can't Stand

**Sorry, it's been a while. I've just started working on two new shows and I don't have a whole heap of free time. But in a way the wait is kind of appropriate given what's to follow here. I hope you enjoy it.**

**I don't own Skins, but I miss it when it isn't there.**

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25. It's The Waiting I Can't Stand

Naomi

It had taken me pretty much two days to shake off the repercussions of Katie's coming out party, though I suspected the embarrassment I was suffering over the way I'd behaved would take a good while longer to shift. Emily was a total sweetheart of course, when is she not? She assured me that she found my drunken antics cute, and that she had been there herself many a time before. There was no time to dwell, for tonight I had to move on to new challenges. I was to be subjected to my first Fitch Family dinner as Emily's official girlfriend, and I was more than a little nervous to say the least. Despite Jenna's appearance of grudging acceptance, I still felt that she would relish any slip up, and welcome any evidence of my unsuitability for her beloved Emily. There was also the ticking time bomb of Effy and Katie's relationship. Katie had managed to get Emily to invite Effy as her best mate, but they were going to have to come clean soon. The whole fucking peninsula must know about them by now, and if she heard about it from idle gossip, Jenna was going to go ballistic. Katie had to have gotten her fiery temperature from somewhere, and it certainly wasn't Rob.

"Alright there, Naomi love?" he asked, pulling me into one of those famous hugs as soon as Emily and I walked into the dining room. "How's all that study going?"

"It's going pretty good," I said, reeling off a bunch of figures that I was fairly certain were going over his head.

"Nice to have a brainbox in the family," he grinned.

My eyes shot involuntarily over towards Jenna. I wasn't sure how well she would take to Rob's arbitrary inclusion of me in their family. Her eyes narrowed slightly, but she left it at that.

"Not just brainy, but well fit too," added James enthusiastically. "I don't suppose you've got a sister?"

"Sorry James," I told him. "I'm one of a kind."

"You can say that again," grinned Emily, wrapping her arm round my shoulders and kissing me on the cheek.

Again my focus slipped over to the matriarch, wondering how much she could handle before she would snap.

"Why don't we all sit down?" she grimaced through her rictus grin. "I've made us a lovely swede and lentil soup to start."

Emily had warned me about her mother's strange ideas on healthy eating, so I made sure I'd had a massive lunch to stock up. Still, I was grateful for the distraction. Effy still had her tell tale smile plastered all over her face, and I knew it wouldn't be long before someone brought it up. She was hardly known for being such a little ray of sunshine. I stood back up and offered to help Jenna dish out the soup, ignoring Emily's smirk at my blatant over-trying.

"You seem very perky today, Effy," said Rob.

"Well life has been rather lovely lately," grinned Effy.

"Glad to hear it," beamed Rob in reply. "You know you're almost like another daughter to me."

My eyes widened in horror as I realised that Effy and Katie were holding hands under the table. It felt like all my senses had gone into overdrive, and time was slowing down the way it does when your car's about to crash making me hyper aware of everything.

Well not quite everything.

"Fuck," I said, as I spilled hot soup on my hand, dropping the bowl I was holding into the soup pot.

Emily was on her feet in an instant.

"Are you alright, babe?" she said, taking my hand and wiping it clean with a napkin.

"No lasting damage," I said, struggling between my adoration for my caring lover, and my need for decorum in front of Jenna.

"Sit down, Naomi," said Jenna, seeming grateful for having a concrete task again. "I'll finish this off."

She waited until everyone was served and had taken their first nervous sips of the dubious concoction in front of them, before dropping her next bomb.

"So Katie," she said, her voice laced with intrigue. "We haven't seen much of you over the last week. Have you got a new love on the horizon?"

Every pair of eyes in the room locked onto the burgundy haired twin, grateful for an excuse to stop eating their soup.

"Aw shucks, you've gone and found me out," replied Katie deadpan.

"Well," said Jenna excitedly, eager for some heterosexual news. "Who is he? When are we going to meet him?"

Katie rolled her eyes, and glanced sideways at Effy, whose lunatic grin told her everything she needed to know about her partners willingness to come clean.

"It's not a he," said Katie, pulling their joined hands from under the table and placing them in plain sight. "It's Effy."

There was a moment's deathly silence, allowing me the time to do a full sweep of the table and take in the various reactions to the news. Emily was smiling supportively at her sister, a calm pillar of strength. James was smirking to himself, his eyes rolling lazily back into his head, no doubt imagining something smutty. Jenna lost her grip on her soup spoon and it clanked noisily as it fell back into the bowl beneath her, whilst her eyes filled with something I couldn't quite put a handle on. Panic maybe? Rob's face registered surprise, followed almost immediately by acceptance.

"No wonder you've been smiling," he said to Effy, punching her affectionately on the arm. "You're a lucky girl, managing to catch yourself a Fitch."

"I know," beamed Effy. "Katie's an amazing woman."

"Well, I would say welcome to the family," replied Rob. "But seeing as you're practically family already, why don't you come and give your old Dad a hug?"

Effy went willingly. Not even enforced parental affection was enough to distract her from her happiness.

"You going to make sure and take care of my little girl now aren't you?" said Rob.

"With my very life," replied Effy, leaving us in no doubt that she meant it.

"Well I think we should get some of the good wine out," said Rob. "Have a proper celebration. What do you think, Jenna love?"

Jenna was staring at the table, her head resting on a bridge of her outstretched fingers. She looked stunned, and kind of broken. On Rob's cue, she raised her head, and looked slowly between Emily and Katie.

"Both of you?" she said hopelessly.

"Effy loves Katie, Mum," said Emily calmly. "Like _really_ loves her. Don't you want Katie to be loved?"

"But, _both_ of you?" repeated Jenna, still stuck firmly in her loop of disbelief."

"I think you're just going to have to face it, Love," said Rob. "Apparently it's quite likely that if one twin is gay then the other will be too."

"Well it's not quite as simple as that," said Effy. "There have been a number of studies done, and the one things they all have in common is that the incidence of a shared homosexuality is much higher in monozygotic twins than in dizygotic twins like Emily and Katie. Initial results showed a rate of sixty five point eight percent for monozygotic and thirty point four for dizygotic, although later studies adjusted the figures downwards due to the likelihood of twins that already had an interest in sexuality being more responsive to surveys on the matter. But several results have implied that the incidence of shared homosexuality are higher amongst female pairs than amongst male pairs."

Effy ground to a halt as she realised almost everyone was snickering at her little lecture.

"Being doing your research, darling?" smirked Katie.

"I may have looked into the subject a little," confessed Effy sheepishly.

"I think it's cute," said Katie, nudging their shoulders together.

I began to wonder if me and Emily looked as fucking soppy as those two, and was about to embark on working out a strategy to change that. Seriously, they looked so fucking sweet together they put strawberries and cream to shame. It was beyond me how anyone could question the wisdom that they belonged together, but Jenna was determined to give it a damn good try.

"So what you're saying is that it's not necessarily a twin thing if they're not identical?" she pressured.

"I don't care about the bloody statistics, Mum," countered Katie. "All I know is that I fell in love."

"Look, I know there's not that many decent blokes round here," sighed Jenna. "But that's no reason to settle for second best."

"Effy's not second best," exploded Katie. "She's fucking wonderful. No bloke's ever made me feel the way she does."

"What about Adam?" said Jenna triumphantly. "You were totally in love with him."

"Who's Adam?" frowned Effy.

Katie oozed with the confidence of a gambler who knows she's got the winning hand.

"My mystery admirer," she grinned. "We didn't know his name so we made one up for him."

"Now he _really_ loved you, Katie darling," said Jenna. "Remember all those beautiful things he wrote to you. I've never seen passion more beautifully expressed."

"You showed your Mum the letters?" said Effy, raising her eyebrows.

"I was eighteen," shrugged Katie. "Emily was off getting her gay on. I wanted to have someone to get excited with."

"Maybe his situation has changed. What if we try to get in touch with him? What if he came back for you?" said Jenna desperately.

"He won't come back for me?" laughed Katie.

"You don't know that," insisted Jenna.

"He won't come back for me, Mum," said Katie. "Because he never left. And he wasn't a he. Adam was Effy, and she's right here for me. Just like she always has been. I freaked out when I found out, and pushed her away. And most of that was cause of the bullshit you'd laid on Emily. It made me believe I couldn't be happy with Effy, when I could have been with her all this time. You're right. I was totally in love with her, and now that I've finally admitted that, I'm damned if I'm going to let you take her away from me again."

"You wrote those letters?" said Jenna, looking like she was falling deeper and deeper into shock.

"I did," said Effy. "And I meant every word."

Clearly Effy was more eloquent on the page than she was in speech, because Jenna looked like she had been affected by her words almost as deeply as Katie had.

"But they were so _beautiful_…" she said, her resistance seeming to collapse in on itself like a red giant imploding to become a white dwarf. "Everything was so perfect."

"It still is," said Katie. "Except now it's real."

"And you?" said Jenna, turning suddenly towards me. "Is that how you feel about Emily?"

I had never read Effy's love letters, but then I didn't need to. She may be a woman of mystery in all her other affairs, but when it came to Katie, she was an open book. I knew that Effy and I were blood sisters in passion, equally captivated and entranced.

"I fell in love with her the moment I saw her," I blurted out enthusiastically. "And every second I spend with her only increases my certainty that she is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with."

"I just don't understand how it works," said Jenna.

"Yeah, you do," said Emily, flicking her eyes over to her Dad.

Dinner was abandoned shortly afterwards, Jenna declaring that she needed some time alone. Rob and James gleefully cooked themselves a frozen pizza, and retired to watch some football, whilst the four of us girls decided on a booze and fags approach to the evening, and found ourselves outside under the solar lights in the back garden, drinking beer and sharing the cheeky spliff that Effy had inevitably produced from about her person.

"Well, that went well," said Emily bemusedly.

I knew from what she had told me that she had dealt with a lot worse from her mother.

"I think I might have broken her," said Katie.

"Mommy's little princess all loved up with evil Effy?" said Emily wryly. "I think that might just about do it."

"It's going to be alright," said Effy.

"You reckon," scoffed Katie.

"She understands," said Effy, meeting with sceptical glances from both the twins.

"It's true," I said. "Deep down she understands what it means to love like this. That's how she knew that 'Adam' loved Katie. She won't be able to pretend that Effy doesn't love her now. Eventually she will have no choice but too accept it."

"So when will 'eventually' be?" said Katie snarkily.

"It took you long enough," shrugged Effy.

"Oh, but I am _so_ going to make that up to you," said Katie, jumping into Effy's lap and kissing her breathless.

I knew something wasn't quite right when Effy pulled away from it, and motioned Katie to sit beside her, instead of collapsing into her desires like she usually did. I noticed the affirming glance that passed between her and Emily, and felt a knot twisting tightly in my stomach.

"I've arranged for Huw to take you and Thomas out to sea tomorrow," said Effy. "I'm gonna be needing the boat. I've got stuff to do."

"Smuggling stuff or Ninja stuff?" said Katie casually, as though either of those things were a perfectly normal activity. God, I hoped it was smuggling stuff. Wait a minute. _Smuggling?_

"I knew it," I exclaimed.

"Knew what?" demanded Katie.

"I _knew_ you were a smuggler," I said to Effy.

All three girls just looked at me as though I'd announced my recent discovery that the sky was blue. Clearly Effy's 'Don't ask, don't tell' policy didn't exclude working it the fuck out for yourself.

"Ninja business," said Effy calmly, and the bottom fell out of my world.

.

.

.

The first strains of light were beginning to show in the sky beyond Emily's open curtains and I hadn't had a wink of sleep. Four in the morning, and I had done exactly the same thing I had done last time she had gone away. Gone to her room to immerse myself in her, the scent of her, the look of her things around me. I had gone to wallow in the essence of her that still lurked in her bed despite the fact she wasn't there. I had tossed and turned the whole of the two hours I had been there, finally turning in after staying up late and smoking myself stupid in the Fitches garden. Katie and I had demolished a few bottles of wine, but the alcohol-induced coma I had been aiming for had eluded me. I had been reduced to scrunching up the duvet and wrapping myself around it as if it were the flawless body of my love. My love, who was God knows where…

I hadn't even said goodbye properly. I don't know why, but it hadn't really struck me as I got up to meet with Huw and Thomas that she would be gone by the time that I got back. I didn't even know how long she was going to be away. They were out of range for mobile signal, and I didn't dare ring Effy's satellite phone in case they were in the middle of something. There was a whole troupe of circus girls tying wonderfully efficient knots in my stomach, and I only lasted a few seconds more before I thrashed about in the bed again and turned to face the door. The door that I was desperate would open and reveal a tiny piece of Fitch sized perfection.

Imagine my surprise when it did just that.

"Oh God," I cried out in relief.

"Keep your vagina on, blondestuff," came Katie's cheeky reply. "I figured you weren't going to be doing much sleeping either."

"Not even a nanosecond," I admitted.

"Well shove up then," said Katie.

She walked over and got into the bed with me, immediately snuggling into my side. Ok, so she wasn't _my_ twin, and I'm guessing I was no Effy either, but it made things feel a little less empty.

"So how big a hole have you got in your heart right now?" she asked me.

I had to admit I was struggling to find an image big enough.

"As big as a really fucking big thing," I said.

Katie laughed affectionately.

"You know for such a fucking smart person, you totally let Emily melt your brain," she said.

"Letting her doesn't even come into it," I said. "She'd do it anyway. Resistance is useless."

"I know how you feel," she sighed.

"You're just better at hiding it," I laughed.

"Well I'm not a soppy-assed dork," she asserted.

"Sure about that?" I teased her.

"You need to shut up," she said, snaking her arm around my waist. "Effy doesn't talk so much."

Slipping into the comforting warmth of our substitute bodies, the pair of us were able to doze restlessly for a couple of hours, but soon enough we found ourselves staring at the ceiling again. This body was so close to Emily's, but it wasn't her, and it wasn't enough. I'm pretty sure Katie was feeling the same way.

"Fuck this shit," she said suddenly. "I'm getting up. Are ya coming?"

I couldn't think of anything better to do, so I went along. Katie made us a couple of bacon sarnies, and then we walked across the fields to the dunes.

The sun was well up revealing a beautiful morning by the time the efficiency of my photographic memory and its automatic triangulation betrayed me.

"What are you smirking at?" said Katie.

I could literally feel my boiling blood as it rushed into my face.

"Ha ha, it's something filthy, isn't it?" teased Katie.

"Emily and me…" I stuttered. "The first time… we…"

"Here?" snorted Katie. "God she's just so fucking outdoorsy."

"It was pissing with rain too," I snickered.

"Jesus, what's so wrong with a nice warm bed?" said Katie, shaking her head.

"I couldn't help myself," I confessed. "She's just so fucking gorgeous. I needed her so badly."

"Well she is a Fitch," said Katie smugly. "Effy's the same. Sometimes she just can't get enough of me. It's beautiful."

I turned to face the sea. Even though it was still just over the horizon, I could hear its song calling to me.

"They are coming back to us, aren't they?" I said urgently, needing some of Katie's ballsy confidence to reassure me.

"Of course they are," she said, taking my hand. "Our girls are fucking badass."

We walked hand in hand towards the waves, cresting the final dune and heading down towards the beach. Neither of us said much as we wandered down to the shore, lost as we were in daydreams of our ocean-going heroines, sending out our love into the vast ever-shifting expanse of the water. My time here had changed me in ways far more subtle than the obvious one. Since being with Emily the ocean had changed its meaning for me. I'd had the edges knocked of my intellectual appreciation, and now I was growing to love it the way Emily and Thomas did. I was learning to understand it on a whole new level. It was becoming a part of me. I'm not even sure how long me and Katie stood there just watching it dance and listening to it sing, but all that time I was offering it a silent prayer to keep my honey safe. I just fucking hoped it was listening.

Without even speaking, Katie and I moved as one when we eventually turned and drifted along the beach. We wasted another couple of hours drinking tea at Cook's shed, but in reality we were just waiting. Everything about today was going to be just waiting. Katie had already called her assistant Carolyn and told her she was looking after the shop today. I don't think she could have focussed on anything today either. I hadn't even thought about attempting to do any work myself. I knew it would be pointless. Much better to spend the day drifting with Katie. At least she knew what I was going through, and I didn't have to lie to her about why I felt so feckless.

Lunchtime was spent sharing yet more wine at the clifftop pub, and then the next couple of hours sat on the cliffs looking out over the Worm's Head, soaking up the sunshine and sharing the occasional spliff. We were nicely buzzed, but we didn't want it to go any further than that, especially as the next phone call we would get might be coming from a police station. Katie started talking about how she wanted to branch out, and start opening shops in other towns, giving her a measure of independence from the loving stranglehold of her family, and about maybe moving out and getting her own place. I listened keenly. Her plans were distracting my mind from locking in on the one thought my brain kept trying to force upon me. What if they got caught? What if Emily wasn't coming back?

By late afternoon we had made our way down to the harbour and were taking afternoon tea at Rita's. All of a sudden I felt Katie's hand close over mine.

"How you holding up, babes?" she said.

She moved her hand, and I looked down at my own to see the napkin I had ripped to shreds.

"I can't stand it," I said, looking into her warm brown eyes that all of a sudden looked way too painfully similar to Emily's. "I can't stand this fucking waiting."

"Get used to it," replied Katie, and I was taken aback by the matter of factness of her tone. "This is who you are now."

"What do you mean?" I frowned.

"Look around you," she said. "You are carrying on a tradition almost as old as humanity itself."

I did as she said and looked around the other customers in the café. Apart from a couple of obviously tourist families, the rest of the clientele were mostly women of varying ages.

"They're waiting for the boats to come in," said Katie. "Wherever there's an ocean, you'll find the women who wait. It's been the same for centuries, women sitting and waiting for their men to come home from the sea. Hoping that they'll be safe, hoping they'll have had a good catch, hoping the weather hasn't taken them. Hoping their lover will come back to them. We're used to thinking that the people who go to sea are the brave ones, but these women are just as brave. Of course it's not the same these days with all the technology to keep people safe, but you can never be one hundred percent certain. Effy and Emily know that, they know never to take the sea for granted, but still. And yet day after day these women find a way to cope, to support their partners, not to let the worry show. That's us now, Naomi. Effy's lived on boats since she was twelve years old. It's who she is. She's not going to change. And Emily, well… you know…"

"Yeah," I said with a wry half smile. "Fish genes."

"It used to share the shit out of me when we first moved here," said Katie. "When she started surfing, and I watched her going into those waves so fearlessly. She looked so tiny against all that angry water, I was terrified it was just going to sweep her away one day. I couldn't stand the thought that I might lose her. But no matter how much I would bitch at her about it, I couldn't keep her away from the water. I had to learn to live with it. And now I'm having to learn it all over again with Effy. It's not easy, but to love her is to understand that she needs this, to fight my fear for her. To give her a reason to come home."

She was right. The women who waited were brave souls indeed, and Katie Fitch was a champion.

Some time later we were sitting on a bench overlooking the harbour. Effy's berth was still empty, and Katie and I were still spending wordless minutes staring out to sea, as we watched the other boats coming home, and the men and women who sailed in them come ashore and return to the bosom of their families. Trying to find other things to do with my hands before I smoked myself into an early grave, I had started playing with my Swiss Army knife. It had started with just absent-mindedly stabbing it into the wood. But then my subconscious had taken over and fifteen minutes later I found myself staring down at the words I had carved into the bench. For Emily. My testament for Emily.

"BE BRAVE."

I felt Katie's eyes upon me, and looked up to see her smiling at me. I smiled back at her, an unspoken sisterhood strengthening between us. No words were needed. We held the gaze for a moment longer, then turned to look back out at the sea.

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**I'm sorry if any of you were expecting some action packed adventure chapter, but I always knew I wanted to write this moment from the perspective of the women who were left behind onshore, cause I think it's a story that needs to be told.**

**I've spent a fair amount of time waiting this year. Waiting for people to wake up, not knowing if they ever will, or if they will be the same person if they do. Miraculously, luck has been on our side, and both Cat and SJ came back. But like so many things in life, recovery is complicated… Cat has had to take a little trip back into the hospital (she's out again now), and SJ will be there for some while yet, so your continued love and support is much appreciated. Cause in the end, that's what this story is all about. It's not about me, it's about two very brave young women that deserve all the love that we can give them. And we're all about the love here on HyperFitchedWorld. Trust me, life's too precious a thing to waste it being mean-spirited and cynical. Keep being beautiful…**


	26. For The Thrill

**Today is my birthday, second one I've had since finding this place. I'm going to work, and then I'm going to drink with some beautiful freaks, but first I'm gonna post this for you all, and for my favourite TigerCat, who is unleashed on the world again.**

**Work/school/granny warning is in full force for this one.**

**I don't own Skins, but it would make me a lovely birthday present, don't you think?**

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26. For The Thrill

Emily

"Well how the fuck are we going to get that ashore?" I said, still stood dripping in my wetsuit, staring at the large chunk of metal currently sat incriminatingly on the dive platform at the back of Effy's boat.

"It's not exactly discreet, is it?" added Cat.

But what it was, was perfect. A section of pipe clearly displaying both the dual core, and a stamped serial number that would match up and corroborate Stingray's electronic evidence. We had taken full advantage of Cat's underwater photography skills to take plenty of shots in situ, but here was a piece of concrete irrefutable evidence in our hands. Our problem now was how to get it to where it was needed next.

The dive itself had gone like clockwork, Cat and I hitting the water at dawn with Effy keeping watch up top. The last time I had been here I'd been carrying explosives, and it was a real challenge to keep my breathing regular, and control the Nitrox mixture I needed to breathe safely at the increased depth. The high I'd gotten from it had been incredible. Being able to release after ruling over myself with an enforced calm I wasn't actually feeling sent me hyper. The dull boom of the underwater explosion when Effy flicked the detonator had me dancing on the roof of the boat. Over the years I had left behind the shy little teenager I had been, and developed into a full on adrenaline junkie, seeking out adventure on the wave, but dicing with real danger like that had been a whole new experience. The buzz had stayed with me the whole of the next day. Perhaps that had been why I had reacted so positively to Naomi's reckless dirty shag behind the Post Office, still wanting to ride the wave of irresponsibility. And why I had found it so easy to tell her I loved her that night, buoyed up on a tide of emotion.

This time it was different. Before there had been more physical danger, but we had had the element of surprise. Although the risk had been there, neither of us had really expected to be caught. This time I had spent the whole time under the water expecting to resurface to the shadow of the coastguard's boat, and find Effy under arrest. The enforced slowness of our ascent from depth had been excruciating, and both Cat and I had to keep each other calm and focussed on our breathing. For the first time the sea had felt like a foreign entity that could betray us. I soon as we breached, I spat out my regulator and ripped my mask off, casting my eyes about wildly seeking out the threat that wasn't there.

The relief had been immense, but it wasn't over yet. We couldn't exactly rock back up into the harbour with this big chunk of pipe without arousing some kind of suspicion amongst the prying eyes of the village.

"So how are we going to get it ashore?" I asked Effy, confident that she had some kind of plan.

"Looks like I'm going to have to reveal some of my secrets," she grinned.

Cat laughed at the look on my face.

"I'm guessing that's not something that happens very often," she said cheekily.

"I would say almost never," I confirmed.

"We all have to make sacrifices for the cause," said Effy, pushing the pipe off the back of the boat so that we could tow it to our destination unseen.

Two hours later we were approaching the shores near home.

"Now might be a good idea to fill us in on the plan," I said.

"We have to wait for the tide," replied Effy. "If we get caught before then, the less you know the better."

I frowned. I knew what she was saying made sense, but I figured we were already in so deep, we should be trusting each other with everything. We had all put ourselves on the line for this after all.

"Don't worry, Emily. All will be revealed," said Effy softly.

I tried to relax after that, mainly because I knew that Effy always kept her promises, but I couldn't settle. The next hour was spent fidgeting and pacing, as much as one could actually pace on a small boat. I could feel Effy's eyes following me round, and I knew she was silently laughing at me.

"How can you stay so fucking calm?" I said, rounding on her.

"You don't want to know," she said with a glint in her eye.

"What have you taken?" I said accusingly. "I thought we agreed we wouldn't take any drugs on this trip."

"I'm clean," replied Eff, holding up her hands. "You don't want to know because it involves thinking about parts of your sister's anatomy you probably don't want to be dwelling on."

"Oh gross," I said in alarm as Effy's special smile lit up her face. When she went to her happy Katie place she became invincible. A whole fleet of coastguards could rock up and it wouldn't stop her smiling. I reckoned she wouldn't even crack under torture, if she had Katie on her mind. Sometimes she looked like she would snap in a hefty breeze, but Effy was pure titanium, and one of the strongest women I knew. The other one was Katie, so maybe they were a perfect match after all.

After another hour, Effy gracefully poured herself out of the deckchair she had been lounging in.

"Its time," she said.

She went to the bridge and fired up the boat. Guiding us along the shore to a rocky section with black jagged cliffs, not entirely dissimilar to the landscape close to my secret lagoon. Effy ignored the warning sign of an unmanned lighthouse perched on top of one of the rocks, and navigated us right into their midst. With anyone else as captain, it would have been a nerve-racking journey, and I could see Cat gripping tightly onto the deck rail, attempting to appear calm, but I trusted Effy completely. In the hands of any skilled craftsperson or artist, their equipment becomes and extension of themselves, and the use of it instinctive. When it came to handling boats Effy was certainly an artist. I don't know many people who could have negotiated a craft of this size through the hazards that this stretch of water presented, but it seemed that Effy knew it intimately, dancing us a delicate pathway between the rocks. Up ahead I spotted the dark entrance to what looked like a cave, and my mouth dropped open as we headed straight for it.

"Your not the only one with a special low tide secret place, you know," she said, as she poked the nose of the boat into the cave.

"How the fuck do you…?" I started to ask her, but gave up halfway through the sentence. There was no way to explain Effy sometimes. She just always fucking knew.

My levels of astonishment grew even higher as Effy manoeuvred the boat deeper into the cave, switching on the searchlights so she could find her way in the dark. The rocks opened out and we entered a larger chamber. In the artificial light it looked spooky and beautiful. Effy moored the boat next to a sturdy metal ladder that was fixed into the wall, and immediately started climbing.

"Give me a minute," she said over her shoulder, leaving me and Cat exchanging amused excited glances back on deck.

"I _so_ want to go up that ladder," grinned Cat.

Suddenly banks of lights set high in the roof of the chamber kicked into life illuminating the whole space. Cat was off up the ladder like a shot, and it didn't take me long to follow. When I got to the top I was greeted by a smug looking Effy.

"Welcome to the office," she said, gesturing to an opening behind her. I passed through a door in the rock, and found myself in another chamber. This one looked like a warehouse, which it effectively was. There were boxes and boxes of booze and fags on the shelves, various high end electrical goods, and even a fancy motorbike. At one end of the shelving, there were several large safes, no doubt containing drugs and money. It was a far slicker operation than I had ever anticipated, she had always seemed so casual and lackadaisical about her affairs. I had always imagined some kind of amateur drug smuggling, mostly to feed her own impressive use and sell to her mates, but it seemed Effy was closer to being her mother's daughter than she liked us to believe.

"You've got an actual smugglers' cave," I said, shaking my head.

"I didn't think it was possible for you to get any cooler, but I think I might need to revise that statement," said Cat.

"A girl's got to earn a crust," shrugged Effy.

"Except you don't, do you Effy?" I said.

One of the secrets Effy had shared with me was that her mother had made sure she had more money than she would ever need. Effy's simple lifestyle meant that she had hardly touched it for her own pleasures, but in some kind of strange ethical money laundering, she used it to invest in and support green businesses, and I knew there was a school somewhere in Mauritania that owed it's existence to Effy's creative usage of her mother's dirty money.

"So why do you do it?" asked Cat.

"For the thrill," replied Effy.

I got it. After my adrenalin-soaked adventures as a Sea Ninja, I could see how the risk could become addictive, especially for someone like Effy, who lived for the thrill. I suddenly became concerned for the welfare of my sister's heart.

"What about Katie?" I asked, sparking off another firecracker of a smile.

"I'd stop it if she asked me to," said Effy.

"You'd do that for her?" I said.

"Don't you know she's the biggest thrill of all?" she grinned.

"I've primed my contact who can get this to the press," said Cat, once we had winched the pipeline up from the boat to the storeroom. "We just need to be able to get it up to London somehow."

"Got it covered," said Effy, with her usual economy of words.

"How?" I asked her to elaborate.

"Rubbish Pete," she replied casually.

Rubbish Pete was a guy who rocked up here from London every now and then. He was some kind of office dude in real life, and he had earned his nickname, because try as he might, he was absolutely crap at surfing. It didn't seem to deter him though, he had a smart looking new van and a range of Katie's finest equipment. But even though he enthusiastically flung himself into the water every time he came here, he never seemed to get any better. I felt so sorry for him, I even offered him some free lessons one time, but his natural incompetence seemed to defeat even my advanced teaching skills. Some of the local dickheads seemed to get annoyed with his amateurishness, but he was a nice enough bloke, and it's not like anyone can own the sea. As long as he was happy in the water, did it really matter that he wasn't any good?

"Are you sure we can trust him?" I questioned Effy. "I didn't know you even knew him that well."

"He may be a rubbish surfer, in fact he actually hates it, but he's an excellent delivery man. He's been working for me for the past two years. Discretion guaranteed," grinned Effy.

"Fuck, I had no idea," I gasped.

"I wanted to protect you, Emily," replied Effy. "But now we're all criminals together so what the hell."

"So when do we meet with him?" said Cat.

"We don't," answered Effy. "That's the beauty of the system. There's a hidden land based entry to this place. He collects the package, we give him a time and a place, and everything is taken care of."

I found myself bursting out into laughter, as the tension of the last week, exploded casually out of my body. If I was going to break the law to save the world, I could do a lot worse than pick a partner with an inherited genius for crime. We were actually going to fucking get away with this, and my head was filled with dangerous urges to do more. Cat must have recognised the glint in my eye.

"Stand down soldier," she told me. "Discretion is the better part of valour. I really hope to work with you and Effy again sometime, but for now you need to lie low."

"So how about we get the fuck out of here before we lose the tide?" said Effy, grabbing a case of the expensive champagne that always seemed to inhabit her fridge from one of the shelves.

"Ninjas, to the sea," said Cat, and headed back to the ladder.

"This isn't over for us, is it Eff?" I said.

All I got back was one of Effy's infuriating stares, but it held a mirror up to me and gave me my own answer. However much we might tell ourselves we were doing it for the planet, there was always going to be a part of us that was doing it for the thrill.

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They were waiting for us when we eventually got back to the harbour, and I was treated to the almost unprecedented sight of Katie running, as the pair of them sprinted down the jetty. She didn't hold my attention for long though. I became rapidly mesmerised by the moving form of my wonderful blonde. She wasn't much more of a natural runner than Katie, but right then she was still pretty much the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. My heart started beating faster as it anticipated the point of impact, when I could throw myself into her arms, and feel that wonderfully addictive body pressed close to mine again. Her long legs easily outpaced Katie, and she somehow managed to leap from the jetty to the boat, before I'd even fixed the ropes or attached the gangplank.

"Wow, that was impressive," I managed to squeeze out, before the air was taken from me in a crushing embrace. She had no words for me, and instead sang me a whole iPod full of passionate love songs in the searching energy of her kiss. As always I had absolutely nothing to fight back with, and I felt myself opening up to her completely in the face of that glorious intensity. I would have let myself be swept away without a trace, were it not for the timely intervention of my sister.

"Oi lezzers, tie the fucking boat up. Not all of us are about to go all Jack Sparrow on your ass," said Katie.

"I'm on it," laughed Cat, throwing the ropes ashore, and jumping after them to moor us to the bollards. Inevitably, my eyes drifted back to Naomi, who began to touch my face as if it were the first time she'd seen it.

"You have no idea how glad I am to see you," she said softly, her blue eyes radiating a shimmering density of emotion.

"I think I might have some idea" I replied, my hand almost shaking as I touched her cheek. What had I been thinking? The idea that I could possibly live without seeing this face every day was ridiculous. It felt like I had survived a car crash or something. During the crisis my body's survival systems had kicked in to keep me calm and in control. But now that I was safe again, the flood of fight chemicals flushed itself through me, making me hyper and more than a little dazed. Our eyes locked, and we tentatively touched each other as if making sure the other was real. The tiniest of those touches held me captive. They held weight. Right now those touches were the most important interactions of the planet. They were more than words, more than poetry or grand gestures of love. And that was where Naomi was different. Her touch was so much more than a surface stimulation. Every tactile moment penetrated right through to my heart.

We were distracted by the sound of a loud thud of to our left, and broke the gaze to see Katie practically manhandling Effy down the stairs, whilst all the while keeping her trapped inside a vicious game of tonsil hockey.

"I guessing that might be our cue to leave," said Cat.

"Sure, yeah," I said. "Do you want to come with us and get something to eat, or something."

"No thanks," she smiled. "All this love in the air is making me seriously miss my honey. I'm gonna go back to my place and Skype her. Besides, I think it might be counted as a crime against humanity to keep you from that blonde a moment longer than necessary."

I watched her go, before turning back to my lover. Strong, brave, beautiful, funny Cat. I was going to miss her, but she would no doubt be happy doing what she did best – loving her girl and saving the fucking planet. Naomi was waiting for me when I turned back to her, her face still alive with passion. She still hadn't said anything, but when she did, it made me tremble.

"I want you," she whispered.

"Where?" I replied breathlessly.

"Anywhere," she told me.

I didn't take her home. I didn't take her back to the cottage. That would have been too normal, and I wasn't ready to give up the adventure just yet. Instead I drove her to the Fitchwater boathouse. All the way over there she had clung to me as tightly as she could manage, her fingers tightening and extending against my stomach. Again, I rejoiced in her touch, in this precious contact that meant so much to me. I used to wonder about falling in love. I'd imagined finding some intellectual soulmate, or some fit adventure girl I could share experiences with, but I had never imagined that so much of love would be about the physical. I'm not just talking about the fucking, though God knows that was spectacular enough. I had just somehow imagined that love would be more ethereal. I had never thought that so much of the emotion would be understood and communicated through touch, that if I were to somehow lose my other senses, I would still know that Naomi loved me.

I let us into the boathouse, and opened up the big boat doors to reveal what I had been hoping to find. The boathouse sat on a small river that opened straight out onto the sea. We were almost at the summer solstice, and despite the lateness of the hour, the sun was still hovering above the horizon, but starting to cast long evening shadows, and lighting up everything with a deliciously warm orangey glow. Naomi came up behind me and wrapped her arms around me from behind, as I looked out at the sun leaving a diamond trail across the water. I turned round to see her beautiful face illuminated in that gorgeous light, and I could contain myself no longer. I grabbed a handful of her top and pulled her to me, trapping her in an open mouthed kiss. A kiss that was a promise. A kiss that was the start of something. She responded immediately, her tongue robbing me of any self control, and dragging me willingly down the path of abandon. I wanted her to overwhelm me.

"I want you to fuck me like last time," I hissed in her ear. "I want you take me over."

Naomi didn't hesitate. She grabbed me, picked me up and threw me over her shoulder. I would have wondered where such a geeky kid got her strength, but Effy once told me that the chemicals that run through our brain when we are in love are more powerful than any drug, that they can make us superhuman. And Naomi was most definitely a woman in love. She set me back down on the jetty, and leapt down into one of Dad's speedboats, immediately turning to reach up her arms and lift me down to join her. Her next passionate kiss steered us towards the padded bench seating at the back of the boat, one hand pressed into the small of my back to push me towards her, the other already pushing away layers of clothing and reaching for my breast.

"Oh fuck," I groaned into her mouth as her hand reached its destination, squeezing me through the fabric of my bra.

"You got that right, angel," she told me, pushing me down onto the seat and attacking my neck with hungry kisses.

I pulled her down on top of me, and rolled my body against hers, already wet and desperate for the feel of her inside me.

"How do you make me want you so much?" I said as she dragged my hoodie from my body.

"I don't know," she replied. "But I'm fucking glad I do."

She pushed my T-shirt up and licked my belly, her hands pushing my thighs apart and shoving her tits against my groin.

"Need to get you nekkid, Ems," she said, undoing the button of my jeans and pulling the zip down with relish. "There's something in here that I want."

And Oh God did I want to give it to her.

I raised my hips to help her as she pulled my jeans away from me, casting aside her own top and bra as she did so, leaving her completely topless and me grasping desperately for that beautiful flesh. She grabbed my wrists, and pushed them back over my head.

"Not so fast, Ms. Fitch," she said, ramming her hip bone between my thighs, and making me gasp. "You're mine now."

I wanted to tell her that I was pretty much going to be hers forever, but I thought it prudent not to interrupt. She seized me with an invasive kiss, still pinning me down and grinding into me with her hip. I opened my mouth and my legs for her. I loved the feeling of her dominating me. I had never let myself go like this for anyone before I met her, and I'm pretty sure Naomi had never been quite such an aggressive sex fiend, but somehow we seemed to inspire it in each other. I let her take me with deep kiss after deep penetrating kiss, wanting to be her prisoner, wanting her to trap me with her weight as she made me wetter and wetter.

"You're fucking beautiful," she told me. "But I need more flesh."

"Take it," I told her. "Take whatever you want."

Her eyes flared with furious lust and she released my wrists so she could pull me to sitting and drag my T-shirt over my head. I wrapped my arms around her back, and closed my mouth around her tit, taking her nipple in my teeth and flicking my tongue rapidly across it. The unbelievably gorgeous sound of her moan, and the way she arched her back into me as she straddled me, made me hungry, and I moved my mouth to her other tit whilst reaching up and grabbing the one I had just abandoned with my hand. I buried myself into her pliant flesh. It never ceased to amaze me how wonderful it felt to taste her like this. The deepening intensity of the light from the setting sun painted itself across her torso, and she writhed in front of me as she let me worship her. I felt my own aggression rising, and I almost turned the tables on us, but I felt Naomi's hand grab into my hair, and seconds later I was yanked away from my feeding frenzy and was held tantalisingly just out of reach of my precious treasure. I attempted to struggle, and wrap my mouth round her once more, but she held me firm.

"Nu huh," she said, as she undid the clasp of my bra with one hand. "My turn.

She pushed me back down onto my back, casually tossing my bra over her head. I think it may have landed in the water, but I had no time to worry about such trivial matters, as Naomi had pinned my hands above my head again, and was licking at my nipples with long, flat strokes of her tongue. My ravenous hips bucked up against her, but she used the full weight of her body to keep me pushed back into the seat whilst she had her way with me. I watched her as she licked, and sucked and bit at my breasts. Every now and again she would raise her head to make sure I was watching her, and to gauge my reaction to each of the countless new pleasures she would inflict upon me. Even with a saucy look she could have me moaning and squirming and pushing myself back up against her. The pleasure was so intense, I wasn't entirely sure I was going to survive her fucking me. But in the end I didn't really have much choice, because I definitely wasn't going to survive if she _didn't_ fuck me.

"Oh fuck, what are you doing to me?" I cried as she kissed her way down to the hem of my knickers, and simultaneously scraped her nails down the inside of my thigh.

"I'm taking you to another dimension in which I rule the world," she quipped. "And on NaomiCampbellWorld pants are illegal. So these…"

She pinged the elastic on my knickers.

"These are going to have to go," she said, sliding the offending garment down my legs.

She slid her hands back up my legs towards my thighs, all the while keeping her eyes focussed on her glistening wet target.

"Oh Fuck, I can't wait any more," she said, entering me with two fingers and pushing deep inside me.

"Fuck, you're beautiful, Ems," she said, with pure honesty in her eyes, and I shuddered under her touch.

"Show me," I begged her, as the friction began to light its beautiful fire inside me.

Naomi was done with words. She needed her mouth for more important tasks. She closed her lips around my breast, sucking me hard. She knew what I wanted and she brought me right to the tipping point between pain and pleasure, attacking my soft flesh with teeth and tongue, whilst she began pumping in and out of me. I was desperate for her, and my body undulated frantically beneath her, not knowing which of her proffered pleasures I was craving the most. Once again, I felt myself becoming wanton in her hands. I was a proud and powerful woman, I was a skilled surfer and a badass eco-warrior, I had control of my own destiny and could do what I wanted, but the thrill of giving myself to Naomi like this was unparalleled. I'll admit I used to sometimes take the piss out of Effy for being such a lovesick wimp over Katie, but just like she always did, Effy had known. Effy had known what it is to love. What she had waited for all those years, was this. This moment of absolute abandon to the one woman with the strength to own you completely and yet whom you could still trust to see you came to no harm. It was the ultimate rush, faster than a rollercoaster and more unpredictable than the wave. It made your heart beat faster than a bungee jump, and took you higher than cocaine. And I wanted all of it, and more.

Naomi's whole focus was upon me. I could feel her, not just in the glorious hard fuck of her thrusts and the savage motions of her mouth. Those were just the beginning. I could feel _her_. Every time she pushed into me I could feel her beautiful spirit. With each breath that strained with the effort, with each of her hungry moans, with each touch of her confident fingers as she claimed her property, with each glance from her desire ravaged eyes. Our sweat-coated bodies slid against each other, the tops of my legs were coated in my juices, and the taste of each other's spit lingered our mouths. We were etching ourselves into each other's flesh with scratches and bruises. This was raw, it was elemental, and yet it spoke of an exquisite emotional intimacy. There was nothing between us anymore. This violent clashing of skin and blood and muscle and bones was nothing less than a fusion of souls. I screamed her name with the volume of an opera singer, and she smiled and fucked me harder. I flung my limbs asunder. I wrapped myself around her. And all the while she pushed me and pushed me relentlessly to get me where she wanted me. To the point where she could look me in the eyes and watch me come. It was getting closer. Naomi the Barbarian was here to ravish me, and I was all for being ravished. Both of us were screaming our heads off, and smashing ourselves against each other. Something had to give before we reached critical mass and set of some crazy nuclear reaction that could devastate the earth.

Successive surges of sensation stared to ripple through my cunt, taking me close but not quite pushing me over. I let them wash over me. It was like waiting for my wave, watching and waiting anticipating and feeling. Waiting for the one. The one I was going to ride all the way home. Then I felt it. My eyes snapped up to meet Naomi's, that were waiting for me, filled with smiles. I gave her what she wanted. I let her throw me off the cliff, and I let her watch me fall, knowing she'd be there to catch me at the other end. I came hard, and came again. I lost myself in the fog of love and it felt like flying. When we shuddered to a halt I started laughing. It was the same laugh as I had laughed the day me and Effy had jumped out of a plane for her twenty-first birthday. A laugh that sprang from the mere joy of living, from the truth of knowing what it felt like on the edge. Naomi collapsed in exhaustion on my chest and joined in with her own laughter.

"Fucking hell, Ems," she said. "What was that?"

"That was us," I shrugged.

"We're kinda awesome, baby," she said, smiling lazily up at me.

"Don't ever forget it, Naoms," I urged her.

"I think that would be pretty much impossible," she assured me.

She peeled herself away from my lazy-limbed body, stood up and offered me her hand. I let her drag me to standing, and then she picked up my discarded hoodie from the floor of the boat, and popped it over my head. We climbed up onto the nose of the speedboat and sat side by side to watch the sun starting to dip below the horizon. She put an arm around my shoulders, and I snuggled into her, as we watched the display of pinks and reds and oranges dance their way across the sky, illuminating the clouds into our very own transitory masterpiece. It was breathtaking, a moment that would etch itself onto my brain forever. When the last fragment of the fiery disc had disappeared beyond the dark sea, Naomi turned to face me.

"I don't really need to say it, do I?" she asked me.

"No you don't," I replied. "I know."

"Don't ever forget it, yeah?" she said.

"Yeah," I nodded, the beginnings of tears in my eyes.

The walls of the boathouse began to glow from the strings of solar powered fairy lights that hung along the walls as the light from outside started to fade. We weren't done here yet. I drew Naomi in towards a tender kiss, but suddenly flipped us, so that I had her trapped her against the deck of the boat.

"Oh yeah?" she looked up at me challengingly.

"Ms Campbell, you are under arrest," I said. "You are not obliged to say anything, but anything you do say may be taken down and used in evidence against you."

"On what charges?" laughed Naomi.

"Well, I'm not sure," I said. "But I'm pretty sure you are harbouring an illegal item under here."

I unzipped her jeans and dragged them down her legs, and then crawled back up her body.

"Much as I expected," I nodded. "Pants. How do you plead?"

"Guilty," smirked Naomi.

"You do realise I am going to have to subject you to the full weight of the law for this?" I grinned.

Can the human eye actually twinkle in real life? Cause I'm pretty sure Naomi's ice blue wonders were doing exactly that.

"Bring it on," she smiled.

.

.

.

I woke up to bright sunlight streaming through the doors of the boathouse. I was lying half naked, practically on top of Naomi, under a couple of the fleecy blankets we kept for when we took passengers out in the speedboats. I lifted my head to find her already awake. I don't know how she does it, but even with messed up hair and make up smudged around her eyes, she managed to look impossibly beautiful. I shuffled up her body till I could tenderly take her lips with mine. We kissed softly, as flashbacks flooded my brain, and stirred a fresh desire that snaked its way through my body. I started to kiss my way down her neck, until I noticed a red mark down the length of her jugular vein. I ran the tips of my fingers slowly down it.

"Was that me?" I said tentatively, but I was shocked by her reply.

"I don't want to ever go through that again," she said seriously.

"What?" I said in confusion. Hadn't last night been beautiful?

"I can't do it," she said, cutting into my soul. "It might work for Katie, but it doesn't work for me. I'll drive the boat. I don't know, I'll even make the fucking sandwiches, but next time I'm coming with you."

My panic subsided and I breathed a sigh of relief when I realised what she was talking about.

"What makes you think there'll be a next time?" I asked her.

She shifted her weight until we were both lying said by side, our eyes only inches apart.

"I know you Emily," she said, playing with the loose strands of my hair. "I _know_ you."

She was right. She knew me more intimately than any other human being on earth. And she knew as well as I did that this wasn't an end to it. Some day I would take to the sea again. For the planet, for my lover. For the thrill.


	27. On A Mission

27. On A Mission

Naomi

I was miserable. I was fucking miserable in fact. It was nearly seven months since the wonder that was Emily Fitch had exploded out of the sea and into my life, heralding the most wonderful set of experiences it had ever been my pleasure to undergo. I had fallen in love in an instant, fallen in with a bad crowd, and found myself propelled headlong into a world of sex, drugs and adventure. It was at once an insanely wild headrush and a profound and tender bubble of intimacy. I had never known anyone like Emily, and I had never known the person I could become under her influence. After a life of insecurity where I had so skilfully honed my cautious loner personality, I found myself surrounded by friends I thought of as family, and had developed a bond so deep with a small Welsh village I had begun to think of it as home.

Thomas and I had returned to uni at the end of the project like two conquering heroes. Our work had been hailed a massive success, and we both passed our year with firsts. But even those two weeks away from her had been agony. I had grown so used to having her there. During the last heady days of my residency after the second pipeline raid, Emily had become ever more affectionate, as if she wanted to prove how much I meant to her in the face of the dangers to come. We had waved goodbye to Cat, but I knew that wouldn't be an end to it. Katie and I were just going to have to get used to the fact that our girlfriends were natural born heroes who were destined to take risks for the things they believed in.

The four of us, plus Thomas and Panda took the boat out for a three day jaunt. It was Effy's special treat, taking us out into the Irish Sea to the heart of the waters where the Minke whales swam, showing us first hand the creatures whose habitat we had been researching. Katie had of course complained at first, asking why we had to sail for so long just to go and look at fish, and whilst Emily had rolled her eyes and tried to explain that they were aquatic mammals, Effy had merely tempted her with drugs and booze and sex, and the fact that she could still do internet shopping thanks to the satellite internet. It was a brilliant trip and a fucking awesome party, even if there were, as Panda put it 'limited opportunities to make monkey' with so many of us squeezed onto the boat.

The morning of my last day there I found it virtually impossible to get out of bed, the thought of no more naked Emily for two weeks was simply to horrific to bear. In the end Thomas had to practically drag my ass to the car, with an eagerly snogging Ems still attached to my lips.

Of course, I was back the very second I could make it, cautiously checking for signs of fit Australians in the room that was to become my new home. I knew in my heart that Ems would never betray me, but a lifetime of assuming the worst of people was hard to shed. But shed it I did during the glorious summer that followed. It was a truly hedonistic Summer of Love spent in the finest of company, and it was hard to cling onto my old ways when I was surrounded by such awesomeness. Gina had rocked up a couple of weeks after I got back, and had charmed the pants of the entire village, especially Effy for whom Gina's cheerful, cuddly maternalism was something of a shock, and she immediately adopted her as a long lost mother figure. Even the human glacier that was Jenna Fitch slowly began to warm towards me the longer I stayed in the house, her natural sense of disapproval being eroded by mine and Emily's infectious happiness. And every time I thought Emily could not possibly become more amazing and gorgeous than she already was, she would astound me with some new act of random kindness or senseless beauty that would take my breath away. I had grown up believing that life never really had any happy ever afters, and yet there I was living and breathing proof of their unlikely existence. It was nothing short of perfect.

And that was the fucking problem.

There was no great drama or shocking revelation that kicked me from my perfectly formed cloud nine. Simply the cold creeping fingers of mundane reality. I had to come back to Plymouth. I had a degree to finish, and work to do in a place that held no Emily. She had work to do too, and our plans of seeing each other as much as we could started to slide through our fingers. Cause the long and the short of it is that West Wales is just really fucking hard to get to from Plymouth. Over four hours and eighty-five quid on the train makes nipping to and fro for a weekend more of a mission than an excursion. I have no car, and Emily can't ride her moped on the motorway, and although Effy offered to help, I know Emily doesn't like relying on her for money.

She did lend her the boat one time, when Effy had taken Katie off on a jaunt to Paris fashion week, and Emily sailed over to North Devon, and we had a wonderful few days in a beautiful place called Croyde filled with snogging, shagging and surfing. Yes, that was another product of the Summer of Love. As well as teaching me some advanced dive skills, Emily had finally gotten me out on a board. Of course I was more on a level with Rubbish Pete than the Sea Goddess herself, but it gave us yet another thing that we could share and enjoy together, and the smile on her face when I stood up for the first time was worth all the gold and diamonds in the world.

It was after that that things began to slide. It wasn't through will or lack of intention, but there was a recession on and times were hard for everyone. At first we would Skype all the time, but it was a poor experience compared to the real thing, and after a while the thought of seeing her without being to touch her became more painful, and less and less appealing. Ours became a cyber relationship of tweets and texts rather than meaningful exchanges, and I felt myself slowly drifting back towards the grumpy Naomi from before. I wasn't helped by Thomas jumping in his car all the time and whizzing up to Bristol, or by Pandora's bouncy bundle of fun when she made it down to Plymouth. Seeing the two of them so happy reminded me of what I was missing and made me feel even worse.

But the bottom really dropped out of my world as the cringefest that was Christmas crept into view. I fucking hate Christmas at the best of times, all that materialism wrapped up in a thin veneer of religion turns my stomach, and the only way I can handle it is to bunker myself down with like-minded people and ignore the whole fucking charade. But one by one my options shattered before me. My Mum had met some new bloke she had really taken a shine to and was dragging him off to Laos with her. Thomas was going back to visit relatives in the Congo for the first time in years. But worst of all was that Katie and Emily were being taken off to the North of Scotland to visit with their maternal grandparents. These were the people who had produced Jenna, and it was made very clear that even though the Ice Momma herself had begun to soften, Effy and I were most definitely not welcome to join them. So whilst the rest of the world was pretending to be jolly, I would be left to feed the howling beast of my melancholy all alone.

We were out on our last field trip of the term, on one of the university boats, sailing over to Cornish waters to do a dive cataloguing undersea coastal vegetation. My bad humour had been slightly punctured, by the fact that my status within the group had gone from dork with bad circulation to hardcore diver thanks to the efforts of my amazingly patient girlfriend and a super insulating wet suit that Katie had found for me, and although I had already been down, I was still in my suit giving some advice to another girl who was about to go under, when I was interrupted by the sound of Thomas laughing. I gave the girl a pat on the back, and wandered over to him.

"What's up Thommo?" I asked him. "Thinking about Panda again?"

Just the mention of her name increased the width of his smile exponentially, but that was not what had amused him.

"Look," he said, pointing over my shoulder and out to sea. "That looks like Effy's boat."

I turned round and stared out over the swell to see a small craft that was heading in our direction. I squinted against the sun and made out the familiar sleek lines of the Catherine The Great.

"Fuck me," I hissed. "That _is_ Effy's boat."

I didn't want to believe it only to have my hopes dashed, but I knew it's contours so intimately, and as it drew closer my heart starting smashing against the confines of my chest like a drunk and angry lunatic I couldn't control. The chance to hold my Emily in my arms again? The prospect was almost too terrifyingly beautiful. It seemed impossible, but if she really was here I feared I would go into meltdown. How could the couple of days she might have to spare for me ever be enough? I chanced a quick glance back over my shoulder at Thomas, and the smirk and cheeky eyes that graced his features was enough to tell me that those sneaky Ninjas had conjured up a plot, and that he had been in on it. It wasn't long before the boat came close enough to prove with out a doubt that it was indeed my girlfriend and her best mate conducting a guerrilla raid on my marine botany class. I felt a light touch on my arm and turned to discover my tutor.

"Naomi, I wonder if you wouldn't mind buddying with Parminder," he said. "She's starting to get nervous again."

But in the moment before he had distracted me, I had caught a glimpse of red hair blowing in the breeze and it drew my gaze back towards her like gravity.

"I'm sorry Charlie," I said, as my eyes locked with hers over an ever-decreasing stretch of water. "I can't."

"Why not?" frowned my tutor.

Old Naomi would never have done what I was about to do. She would have dithered about on the boat, embarrassed and gazing at her shoes, and certainly never brave enough to take a leap of faith. But I was a changed woman now.

"I have to make a fool out of myself for love," I told Charlie. "I have to take the plunge."

And with that, and with the sound of Thomas's cheering ringing in my ears, I climbed up and over the railings of our boat, and dived head first into the dark and wintry waters below.

I resurfaced to the sound of cheers and the chanting of my name by my fellow students. When the fuck did I get cool all of a sudden? I swam powerfully and coolly towards the Catherine the Great, my swimmer's muscles much improved from my summer with Emily. Admittedly I had a long way to go before I attained anything like Fitchtastic shoulders, but the effects of my girlfriend had been profound. She had made me into a better person, not by changing who I was, but by unselfishly releasing my potential. I had matured emotionally, spiritually and most definitely physically, finally shaking off the insecurities of my youth and embracing the beginnings of the woman I would become. A woman with a mission.

Effy pulled the boat to a halt ahead of me, and as I reached the dive platform that skimmed just above the surface of the water at its stern, Emily leapt down from the back deck and hauled me from the water straight into her arms.

"I'm all wet," I protested, but she wouldn't relinquish me.

"Just the way I like you," she husked, dragging me into a soft and yet entirely lustful kiss. I immediately deepened it, seeking out her tongue with mine, as a volley of cheerfully lewd catcalls erupted from the other boat. I raised a triumphant fist into the air without breaking our contact, unabashed and unashamed to show the world how much I loved this woman.

"God, I've missed you so fucking much," said Emily, resting her forehead against mine and tangling her hands in my still dripping hair.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked her.

I know that might not have sounded like the best of greetings for my long absent lover, but in my defence I was still in shock.

"We have a cunning plan," said Effy, lounging on a bench seat and smirking down at us fag in hand.

"Does this plan involve a naked Emily at any stage?"

"It does," replied Effy.

"Then I'm in," I said enthusiastically.

They refused to divulge any further details until I was dressed and settled. I had learned well enough that impatience had no value where Effy and Emily were concerned. There would be no point trying to drag it out of them. Simpler just to wait until all was revealed, a particularly entertaining thought where Emily was concerned. Effy pulled up next to the uni boat, and Thomas chucked down my bag with my gear. A stiff towelling down, a change of clothes and a hearty tot of warming rum later, and the three of us were sat round the table in the cabin. I sat with my knees up against my chest, one of Emily's hands encased in both of mine. Like a tiny child obsessed with a new tactile discovery I could have played with that hand all afternoon, relearning the way it worked, the way in smelt, the way it felt against my flesh. My misery had evaporated, and every gorgeous contour of Emily's hand filled me with an infinite joy. I could feel Effy smirking at me, but I didn't give a damn. She might still attempt to maintain her air of mystery, but I knew she'd be a hopeless wreck without her Katie.

"So," said Emily conspiratorially. "Me and Effy are sailing down to the Canary Islands for Christmas, and we want you to come with us."

"You're doing what?" I spluttered.

"Warmth, the beautiful ocean, naked sunbathing," said Effy temptingly.

Ok, so I got a visual, and it was bloody beautiful. I was long past the point where I became embarrassed when my thoughts turned distinctly carnal, and I had grown kind of fond of the sexy beast Ms. Fitch had released from its cage.

"I'm supposed to study," I said half-heartedly.

"Naoms, if you can't study on a boat, then you might want to re-examine your career choices," giggled Emily.

"I'm sure it's not the boat that's going to distract her," countered Effy.

"Please come, babe," said Emily, those unfeasibly soft brown puppy dog eyes gently crushing any last thought of resistance.

"It's kind of a special voyage," added Effy. "So you really ought to be there."

Sensible Naomi would have poo-pooed such a recklessly spontaneous adventure, citing work and any other number of excuses to decline the trip. But sensible Naomi didn't live here anymore.

"I'll come," I smiled.

"I'll make sure of that," promised Emily in a filthy sex voice that nearly had me coming in my pants right there and then.

"Why a special voyage?" I asked Effy, trying to distract myself from the lust that had overwhelmed my body.

"It's my last voyage as the captain of the Catherine The Great," she said.

"What?" I said in dismay. "How come?"

The smile that broke across Effy's face held no signs of dismay at all. In fact she looked fucking ecstatic.

"Katie's moving in with me," she said, near to bursting with pride and happiness.

"Fuck, that's great," I said, trying to disguise the flash of jealousy that ripped through me.

"Yeah," beamed Effy. "But I'm gonna need a bigger boat. You know, for the shoes and stuff."

"What are you going to do with the Catherine?" I asked.

"Sell it, I guess," she shrugged.

I couldn't quite believe she was being so casual about it. This boat held so many amazing memories for me and I had only known her for a summer, and couldn't imagine letting her go if she had been my home. Still, I guess Effy was looking to the future, speaking of which…

"Where is Katie?" I asked.

"She's got to keep the shop open for pre-Christmas sales," said Effy. "She's flying down to meet us when we get there."

"So what happened to Scotland?" I said.

"Katie happened to Scotland," laughed Emily. "It's fucking typical. All those years I tried maintaining family harmony in spite of my inconvenient sexuality. Katie sleeps with one girl and she turns into a one woman Stonewall Riot."

"I believe her exact words were 'If you think I'm going to waste Christmas trying to appease some homophobic dinosaur in Aberfuckingdeen when I could be in the Canaries with my gorgeous bikini clad girlfriend, you've got another think coming'," said Effy. "She was magnificent."

"Well, I owe her," I said, siding my hand along one of Emily's thighs under the table, to a satisfyingly ragged intake of breath.

"Yeah, well I'm gonna drive us back to Plymouth," smirked Effy. I'll leave you two to 'catch up'."

She had barely reached the bottom step before Emily was dragging me towards the bedroom. Looked like I was going to discover the meaning of festive cheer after all.

.

.

.

I was happy. I was fucking happy in fact. The cunning plan had indeed featured a great deal of naked Emily, and I was beginning to wonder if happiness was an infinite concept, because the more time I spent in her company, the happier I got, each new peak of delight being eclipsed by the next. I was pretty sure my face now sported a permanent grin to rival Effy's. The Bay of Biscay crossing had been kind of rough, but I trusted Effy's sailing skills, and the rewards were more than worth it. We were currently moored up in the harbour at Corralejo, a town in the north of Fuerteventura, with beautiful beaches close by and a funky surf culture as well as great restaurants and bars. Even though it was Christmas day, it was still twenty-five degrees and our Christmas lunch had consisted of an amazing salad made from the local goat's cheese, avocados, and tomatoes. We were all cheerfully tipsy in the sunshine out on the back deck, looking fit and healthy with our tans.

"Got to hand it to you Katie," said Emily, raising her glass of champagne. "This is a hell of a lot better than Aberdeen."

"Bitches are well fit," smirked Katie. "Well, mine is anyway."

"Who's next?" I said, ignoring the wind up from my friend.

We were halfway through the gift giving and I found myself unusually possessed with Christmas spirit.

"My turn," said Effy, sitting up straight and rummaging in the bag beside her, extracting a small box and an envelope. "Normally I would dream of giving a couple a joint present, cause it's unbelievably naff, but in this case I hope you forgive me. Who wants to open it?"

"Me, me," I said excitedly, completely forgetting that I hated Christmas and fidgeting like an overexcited six year old on e-numbers.

Effy pushed the gift across the table. I ignored the envelope and went straight for the box.

I yanked the lid off the gift box, and frowned. Inside was a very ordinary looking key on one of those long silver ball type chains that might house a set of dog tags.

"It's lovely," I said uncertainly, holding it up to the light, but when I looked over at Emily her eyes looked like they were about to explode out of her head.

"You can't be serious," she said incredulously.

"Why not?" grinned Effy. "I want her to go to a good home."

"Want who to go to a good home?" I frowned, not quite sure what was going on with the fucking mystery girls.

"Naomi, that's the key to the boat," said Emily.

"What boat?" I said, doing my dumb smart lady act again.

"This boat, honey," said Emily. "Effy's giving us the Catherine The Great."

"What the fuck?" I said, dropping the key, and tearing open the envelope. And sure enough inside were the papers for the boat, made out in mine and Emily's names. Effy fixed me with a steely glare, effectively silencing any protest I might make.

"Now, whatever piece of the world you end up saving, you'll always have a place where you can be together," she said.

And who was I to argue? I knew how much I had hated being without Emily, and Effy had just given us a home. A home that could take us anywhere in the world.

"I don't know what to say," I said.

"I don't need you to say anything," said Effy. "Just make my best friend happy."

"And don't you dare change the name," laughed Katie.

"I wouldn't dream of it," I smiled at my friend.

A message tone went off in Katie's hands. She had given Effy a new iPhone 4S for Christmas, but had spent most of the morning playing with it herself.

"Ooh, Babes, you got mail," she said, tapping the screen. "Oh, for fuck's sake…"

"Who is it?" asked Effy.

"Just some stupid fucking spam," frowned Katie.

"Let me have a look," said Effy, reaching out her hand.

"Trust me, Babes. You do not need a penis enlargement," laughed Katie.

"Let me see anyway," said Effy.

Katie almost dropped the phone into her outstretched hand, but pulled it away at the last minute.

"Hang on a minute," she said, looking suspiciously between Effy and Emily. "This is fucking Cat, isn't it? It's just her style of humour to send you a coded message in a fucking penis enlargement email. Are you bitches on a mission?"

"Well… we don't have to," said Effy.

"But, there does happen to be a fleet working out of Lanzarote that we know are flouting the ban on bottom trawling around the Canaries," said Emily with a cute little innocent face.

"When?" said Katie.

"Tomorrow," replied Effy. "When everyone's still distracted by Christmas."

"Fine," said Katie, her attempt at faking disapproval completely transparent. "You better have booked me into a nice hotel."

"And I'm supposed to be the mindreader," said Effy, her face radiant with her special Katie smile. "And for you too, Naomi. Unless you want to come with us."

I thought back to the morning after that incredible night in the boathouse when I had made my pledge to Emily. I thought back to all the incredible times we had had, and to everything she had given me. Thomas had been right all along, being careful will only get you so far. Sometimes you have to take the plunge. Emily had turned me into a warrior, and I belonged at her side.

"What do you think, Naoms?" asked Emily gently, trying not to pressure me one way or another, but there was no need. My mind was already made up.

"Just point me to the fucking sandwiches," I smiled.

Bitches on a mission. Saving the fucking planet.

**THE END**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**For beautiful Cat, for whom the adventure is just beginning….**


	28. Author's note

**The Bend In The Wave – Author's Note**

**If you have been paying attention, you will know that I wrote this story for an amazing young woman called Cat. When I started writing it, I honestly didn't know if she would be alive to see it finished, but after a year in hospital and two new livers later, Cat is alive and well and unleashing beautiful chaos upon an unsuspecting world.**

**TigerCat, CatAttack, Catherine the Great – all of the nicknames we have for her are testament to the kind of woman she is – the very embodiment of the words "Be Brave". And in these harshest of times I would like to assure you that real life does sometimes have the most glorious of happy endings. Cat is taking life by storm, reunited with her beautiful girlfriend and getting ready to start university next year – to study marine biology! Trust me, the world is a better place with Cat in it, and the planet will be safer in her hands.**

**So once again I would like to thank you for all of your support and well wishes. I know they helped her a lot when times were bad. And I'm glad so many of you enjoyed the story along with us. I only had one purpose with it, and that was to make Cat happy. I could have gone further with it. I'm very fond of these characters, and I would have loved to have seen what would have happened if I'd reintroduced Anthea into Effy's life for example. But I've decided to end it here for one simple reason – it's someone else's turn.**

**There's another beautiful girl who is still in hospital and likely to be there for a while. There was a point not so long ago where she was in a coma, and I made her friend go in and tell her that if she woke up, I would write a story for her too. And seeing as Hypes never breaks a promise to a lady, it is time to make good on my word.**

**Well two words really – expect Keffy and fireworks (real ones!) – watch this space.**

**And finally to Cat, my friend and my inspiration – I love you, and I'll see you down on the wave some time….**


	29. Because the world needs

Because the world needs more good news stories.

So here's something beautiful for you to start your 2012 with… Cat had another bit of a scare not long after I finished BITW, and had to go back into hospital for a bit, but it did not turn out to be to be too serious and now she's back on track. And I think one of the main reasons she was so upset about it was that she had plans… very special plans.

Luckily, she was able to put those plans into action, but little did she know that her amazing girlfriend who has stood by her through all of her troubles had exactly the same idea. They both proposed to each other on Christmas Eve by the side of an outdoor ice rink, and now the happiness emanating from a certain part of the northern USA is enough to light up half the planet.

True love does exist people, and it can overcome the most difficult of circumstances. There is nobody more deserving such beauty in their lives than these two amazing young woman and I wish them my most heartfelt congratulations. I shall be readying my posh frock for the wedding…

I hope that 2012 sees at least some of your dreams come true.

Spread the love

Hypes xx


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